I was fortunate to have multiple experiences in the operating room (OR) during nursing school and was immediately drawn to surgery and the compelling OR environment. Upon finishing nursing school, I completed my nursing capstone in Kenya and was able to spend more time in the OR observing cesarean sections. Ultimately when I graduated nursing school, I was still unaware of the full scope of a Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetist (CRNA) practice and chose to start my nursing career in the pediatric emergency department. This is where my interest in anesthesia began, and my passion grew. Working in pediatric emergency at a level 1 trauma center, I had the opportunity to perform daily procedural sedations with ketamine for a variety of orthopedic injuries, assist during rapid sequence intubations, manage patients’ pain and hemodynamics, and join a committee working to implement the use of nitrous oxide in our department. Throughout these experiences, I found myself continuously drawn to anesthesia and furthering my understanding of the pathophysiology of my patient’s illness and the pharmacology of the many medications we use in emergency nursing. I thoroughly explored multiple graduate routes, including acute care nurse practitioner, surgery first assist, and CRNA. By the end of my first CRNA shadowing experience I was confident that I had found my path. I began the transition from pediatric emergency nurse to adult surgical intensive care unit (ICU) nurse just one month later. The totality of my ICU experience was colored by the added complexity and suffering that accompanies a global pandemic. These arduous experiences have only served to reinforce my principal motive and enthusiasm for pursuing anesthesia – the ability to alleviate suffering across the lifespan and improve patient outcomes with the use of evidence-based practice. Racial and ethnic disparities in health are well documented and researched. As we continue to search for solutions to these disparities we must address the lack of diversity within the workforce and how it contributes to health disparities. The population of the United States continues to become more diverse, but the diversity of healthcare professionals and leadership roles in academia fail to represent the changing demographics. This lack of representation ultimately leads to poor patient outcomes and gaps in provider education. Along with creating a more diverse workforce we must also focus on creating a more culturally competent workforce. Computer based education, which is often utilized in large healthcare systems and academic teaching centers, is not enough to adequately create cultural competence. We must provide healthcare workers and students with the safe space to explore their implicit biases and provide the opportunity to interact with diverse populations to gain exposure to different beliefs and cultures. With a doctoral degree in nursing I hope to conduct research and advocate for diversity and accountability in our healthcare system.

My entire life and childhood was colored by the complexity of mental health struggles. Although this was not an easy journey, it made me the resilient and compassionate nurse that I am today. My mother spent my entire childhood with undiagnosed borderline personality disorder and substance abuse disorders. It was very confusing for me to learn how to regulate my emotions and navigate life challenges in a healthy way without seeing those behaviors modeled at home. This shaped my understanding of the world in the form of emphasizing the importance of community. I have countless friends, extended family, and neighbors to thank for the ways in which they helped shape me into the confident, well adjusted adult that I am today. In addition, I learned from her what not to do in my interpersonal relationships and helping her through her mental illness made our relationship stronger than I could have ever imagined. Unfortunately my mothers mental health struggles became a crisis while I was trying to pursue my undergraduate degree. During my freshman year of college my mom attempted suicide twice. My younger brother was still at home living with her and this prompted me to drop out of college after my freshman year and move home to support my family. Unfortunately my mothers mental health only continued to decline and after several more suicide attempts she ended up in in-patient psychiatric care for 13 months. During this time I reenrolled in my local community college to pursue a career in nursing and began attending courses through The National Alliance on Mental Illness. These courses taught me how to cope with what I was going through and how to advocate for my mother. I am so happy and proud of my mother for being six years sober and continuing on the healing journey of controlling her borderline personality disorder. Obtaining my bachelors degree in nursing while I had all of this going on was the hardest thing I have ever done but it was the best decision I ever made for myself. Seeing someone I love struggle with mental health inspired me to go into a field where I knew I could make a difference in peoples lives every day. I have been a nurse for 4 years now and spent 2 years working in pediatric emergency and 2 years working in the covid ICU. I have seen countless patients and families struggle with mental health throughout my career and my time at NAMI has helped me be able to navigate these complex situations and emotions. The experiences I have had with mental health throughout my life have taught me to treat my own mental health the same way I do my physical health. I do things to build resiliency like practicing gratitude and working to build strong and meaningful friendships. I view therapy as going to the gym but for the mind. I go to therapy weekly and I am hoping that this scholarship will allow me the financial freedom to continue this practice while I am in graduate school pursing my doctoral degree in nursing.