I remember my first day of band camp like it was yesterday. I stood on the back hash mark, the right corner of our block. I had a senior to my left, the only person in my field of vision. I felt anxious, and alone in that moment. I felt that way for most of my freshman year. At the time, I was struggling with an eating disorder, and as a result I spent freshman year with constant brain fog, barely functioning day to day. Somehow, though, band always remained a safe space. As the year went on, I managed to connect with more Regiment members, and I made friends who truly cared about me. Most of my memories from freshman year feel just as foggy as when I was living them, but the few memories that do remain, crisp and clear, are from band. One of the seniors donning a gilly suit for practice, singing Bohemian Rhapsody on a bus ride, senior circles, meeting my now boyfriend on a weekend trip, eating dinners together during band camp, listening to seniors commentate for the football game even though none of us knew the rules, the campfire at our section sleepover. I know I’ll never get my freshman year back, but I’m forever grateful that band allowed me to keep even a fraction of that time. Sophomore year, COVID was in full swing. Our section had dwindled from seven to three. Still, we were on the field three times a week. We played music and stuck through it. That was the year I began recovery. With my eating disorder making less of an impact, I started to gain a sense of myself. The rehearsals of that year mimicked the resiliency that recovery took for me. I had to show up for myself, so I could show up for the band. By my Junior year, I was the most senior member of my section, and took on the role of section leader. That year, we managed to grow into a four person section. For the first time, my section clicked in a way we never had before. I gained confidence, and got a lot more talkative during rehearsals. I planned the flute sleepover that year, and a sophomore and I compiled supplies to make our own section shirts, since ordering them never seemed to work out. We made shirts, and cut each other's hair. I gained back the confidence my eating disorder had stolen, and learned how to organize and effectively teach my section. By the end of that season, my section was united again, and I was excited to see where the next year would take us. As I’m writing this, we are three weeks from the end of my senior year’s season. We head to prelims this weekend, where we’ll qualify for state for the second time in Panther Regiment history. Tonight, it’s year two of another new tradition: Karaoke night. We’ll eat pizza and steal Mr Nicholas’ field mic to sing in the band room. Most of the band refers to it as family dinner, and I think those two simple words sum up what the band means to me. I’ve gained confidence and organizational skills through leadership as a section lead and woodwind captain. I’ve learned how to manage people and honed my conflict resolution skills. But above all, I have found a family in the band program. I have a place to go where I will always be incredibly loved, and that chosen family is healing.