I kind of froze up with this question because how can I narrow down the possibility of there being just one hero? In my story, there is a lot of heroes. There's my hero from social services that saved me, there's my aunt who got custody of me, and there's my cousin who is a social worker, she helps me with my anxiety, depression. My cousin, Adiba, has been a social worker for 8 years now. I believe inspiration creates motivation and everyone lives on motivation, and this motivation can be bad or good depending on whom you look up to for guidance in life. My motivation to acquire higher education to become a social worker comes from Adiba. She has given me the motivation I've been needing, to flourish. Without her, I don't think I would be where I am now. In reality, a true hero doesn't receive recognition for their acts; they just live their lives while unknowingly inspiring others. My cousin is one of those hero's, I came to that realization once I arrived at her doorstep. Since I was 3, I had lived with my aunt and her daughter, I called her daughter my sister. My sister had three young children, ages 1, 2, and 15. A year ago sister suddenly passed away and my cousin Adiba came to get the children the same week my sister passed away to live with her because she saw that our aunt was too unstable to take care of them, she invited me to stay with her as well, so I went with them. Even though I was 18, I couldn’t do it alone. A year ago, I didn't understand the importance of minorities, so If the topic of discussion was college, It sounded like a foreign language. Most people in my family refused to get a degree, and that was the environment I grew up in, so being that those were the adults I looked up to, growing up, I always thought college was something smart people in urban areas don't do. After I moved to Adiba's house, she changed that mindset I had, now I want nothing but a successful life. The story of my past still makes the hairs on my arms stand up. The story starts with my mom's mother who had Bipolar Disorder. She abused my mom continuously her whole life. After my mom got pregnant with me at 17 she left her mom's house and was homeless with my dad, then at 18, I was born. My mom started to show symptoms of schizophrenia after my birth. While I was with them, my biological mom had a babysitter for me for 2 years and during that time, the babysitter was abusing me. My mom knew, but she was pleased with it because that's what her mom did with her. It was only a miracle I survived all of that. In conclusion, my cousin Adiba is my hero. She showed me a different way of life and to aspire to be my greatest self. My life has been a rollercoaster ride full of ups, downs, twists, and turns. I survived my trauma and have learned and grown from it. I am more than thankful for my cousin. Her inspiration has motivated me to be more, I'm am now 19, and I want to go to Stockton University to become a Therapist to help people in need. Lastly, for anyone reading this, it is important to look for connections in your everyday life, they bring clarification, and a greater understanding of reality.

January 2020, covid-19 struck the United States. All in panic, every business, school, and some hospitals shut down. Children were out of school for months and left without education, and working citizens were out of a job for months. When the world closed and locked its doors, It felt like I was in the middle of a street, and I was alone, and I had to drop everything and run. That was a moment of realization that I took a lot of aspects of life for granted. Mental illness played a big part in my pandemic experience. Let's say I am not known to be the most optimistic person. I couldn't leave my house without constant fear of catching the virus and giving it to others. I couldn't live with the idea of catching the virus and family members passing away because of me. When my mind wondered, any time I went outside my home, that's what I would think. I thrive on joy and happiness, and during the pandemic, I didn't get that because I was struggling to cope, as were they, so I was constantly depressed. The pandemic led me to struggle with anxiety and depression. I struggled with this mostly the whole pandemic. Additionally, I reminisced about all the times when I had the opportunity to live. During the pandemic, I had no life; I was and still am just in the house. It hindered my natural way of life, but I can say the pandemic has made me more active with the family, It also made me open up to doing more things like making music and family activities. I had to waste a year + of my life because of covid. I look at older people and dream about how exciting their life must have been before the pandemic because I'm only 19, my life hasn't even started yet. Furthermore, during the pandemic, April 16th of 2020, my sister passed away. We weren't able to bury her till a month later. We couldn't bury her due to high deaths from covid. The funeral home told us numerous lies, and this is something I will never forget. I had to look at my sister in a casket, and she didn't look not one inch herself. She had three children, a 1, 2, and a 15-year-old, and they didn't and still don't have any father figures in their life. They had to move away to someone in the family who is more suitable for taking care of them, and when they left, I left with them. This shaped my plans for the future by encouraging me to go to college. My sister didn't get the chance to go to college, and it was rare that any family members went to college. So I want to do what she couldn't. I want to pursue her dreams by doing what others in the family didn't do. I want to make her and everybody else proud to see their cousin, daughter, and niece walk across that graduation stage. In conclusion, I learned that I have a pessimistic personality when things scare me. I learned that growing up is all about self-discovery, and most of the time, it's through unexpected ways. Covid-19 was definitely unexpected; while it was in motion, I broke myself down way too many times, and I came out a better person. During this time, without me knowing, I found things in my everyday life that made my lonely life worth living. I did things like sewing, designing things, family activities, painting, making music, and even took months off social media and focused on the essential things during this time of instability, and that's self-reflection and grief.

On April 16th of 2020, I got the call that my sister passed away. The boldest thing I’ve ever done was having to say goodbye to her in a casket and she didn’t look herself. She had to be kept above ground for a month before she could be buried because the deaths were high due to Covid. She left behind me, her 1, 2, and 15 year old son. She didn’t get the chance to go to college, so I’m trying to make her proud by doing what she couldn’t.