One of the best things that I have found is trying out new hobbies and sticking to ones that give routine. For me, a lot of my anxiety and depression came from not having a set schedule or routine for an extended period of time because I constantly feel like I should be doing something. Finding something that I could do in my free time that I actually enjoyed really helped. Also having that hobby be doing something physical such as crocheting, or going outside for a bit really helps reset the mind. I tried guided meditations for a bit and they were nice, especially when it is nice outside. I personally find sitting outside to be calming sometimes because it helps me get some fresh air into my system because most of the time I am stuck in a house or a building so I don't often get to spend time outside. Or doing a combination of being outside while participating in a personal hobby. Having a hobby that you do by yourself and for yourself is really important because it separates the other aspects of your life such as work or school from your own personal life. It is something that you do for only you, not anyone else, it is okay to be selfish sometimes, especially when it comes to your mental health. I know a lot of people cannot afford to go to therapy or counseling, but making time for yourself is honestly the best way I can suggest getting through some of the tough times.

Truthfully, I am not sure where to begin on my mental health journey. I feel like I have always had some sort of anxiety, but when COVID-19 hit all I had were myself and my own mind which drove me down a rabbit hole of both depression and anxiety, worrying about if I would be okay, or if the people around me would be okay. I began distancing myself from everyone while getting too close to myself, which I do not recommend. I had a few close friends, but I also felt like I was burdensome to those and so I hardly reached out. I was crying everyday over things that I did not understand and I honestly was not sure if I could take it. I started taking out my frustrations and anxious energy on those around me and it severely impacted my relationship with my boyfriend negatively. Then that same year, I lost one of my best friends to his mental health battle. I know that I did not have any clue that it would happen but I couldn't help but blame myself and be angry with him for not letting anyone in. It was truly a sharp turning point in my life. We were not related, but he was my brother and losing him was the worst thing I have experienced. After his death, I put up a wall and even now I am terrified of engaging in close relationships, so I haven't and I am not sure when I will. I am naturally introverted around strangers, probably because of my anxiety and the fear I have of people judging me, so I never really was too amazing at making friends, but I was comfortable with the few close friends that I did have. Emphasis on was. As of lately, I haven't been terribly confident in myself in constant fear of judgement and saying the wrong thing and not fitting in anywhere. I have always been worried about my future; doing things on a certain timeline, how I would survive in this world, what career I would choose; I was never too sure about anything except being in the medical field, but honestly that was not really my own choice, at least at first. I have grown to love the idea of working in the medical field somehow, I find science interesting, but even more so, medicine. I have always been anxiously and cautiously driven, which has its benefits in some aspects, such as I have heavily considered all of my options and have essentially played out specific pros and cons of certain careers. Since my anxiety has worsened, I have had a lot of time to really consider what I want to do and what is reasonable to do with all my concerns. As for my beliefs, my mental health has not truly altered my core beliefs, however it has made me more passionate about the things that I believe in. My main beliefs are that people should be able to express themselves and do what they want without judgement, obviously to an extent, but that is the general concept. I am always so concerned about judgement to myself, I really never want to make others feel that way, although I am sure not everyone shares the same worries that I do in that aspect, but I think that is one way that my anxiety has shaped how I view others and life.