I wish I was Vietnamese. Having almost all of my friends being Vietnamese, the words of not being “Asian enough” rang in my ears. Insecurity seeped through my mind filling it with anxiety as my Vietnamese friends would never fully accept my identity of being a Filipino-American as Asian. They have the ability to strengthen their mastery of the Vietnamese language through classes to keep intact with their culture and various Vietnamese students to confine in solidarity. Confronted with my feelings of wanting to fit in, an agonizing ultimatum weighed my shoulders, to decide whether I would force myself to assimilate into their culture or embrace my identity as a Filipino-American. If I chose the former–leaving my culture behind–I would have to adopt aspects of Vietnamese culture to be “more like them.” The constant presence of Vietnamese friends has led me to feel a sense of paranoia in our friendships. My Vietnamese friends alienated me, as they held secrets from me, walked at a distance from me, and spoke Vietnamese while I could only smile and nod, just to keep people around me. I stood by them anxiously, knowing that they were the only people I had. Witnessing their actions of pushing me aside, I felt the desire to be accepted by those in the same ethnic group as me. Consequently, I started learning bits and pieces of their language and familiarizing myself with their traditions, Lunar New Year, Ao Dai, foods, and lion dancing. The more I immersed myself in their culture, the more my sense of Filipino culture started slipping away from my identity. At times, I felt prideful when I was mistaken for Vietnamese. Seeing it as a sign that my efforts of assimilation were working, I realized I would be losing my identity as a Filipino. As I progressed into high school, my identity would be struck by a moment of vulnerability. Dealing with the persisting stress of social adequacy, I would lose all composure in an instance from a student saying “You’re childish, just grow up,” causing me to break into a panic attack. The day following the incident, Ms. Dano, a Filipino teacher, pulled me out of class to comfort me after finding out what occurred. As she spoke to me, tears rolled down my face as she told me “Us Filipinos need to stick out for each other, if you need someone I’m always here.” Ms.Dano would drive a passion for me to reconnect with my culture, after seeing how she’s willing to support me because we share similarities. This would drive my passion for ensuring inclusion with others, and in doing so I would become a founding officer of the organization AAPISA. In the organization, we accepted everyone from all backgrounds to join us to expand their knowledge of the different AAPI nations. Welcoming a diverse demographic of students allowed me to strive for countless of them to feel appreciated so they wouldn’t feel alienated. Though it was our first year, we were able to create an impact through club advertisements bringing our club to 50 students. Here these members would be exposed to celebrations, cultural practices, and foods so that we can recognize the numerous nations within Asia. Introduction to these cultures through events fuels student engagement to be eager to join us. Seeing how people are enthusiastic to expose themselves to different cultures made me feel less of an outsider, and more of someone who appreciates what's around me. Having people willing to educate themselves, developed a personal newfound sense of identity and independence. I don’t need to force myself to assimilate to hold friendships with others. Which provided me the confidence to rekindle my friendships with my Vietnamese friends, and no longer have to mold my identity into theirs but have my own. To belong with others is for me to fully accept the person I am and find those who want to be around me. That all these cultural practices between each culture are cherished, and help form one's identity. I realize how beautiful and unique my culture is with its Kamayan, Filpinanas, and lechon, which make us distinct from others and should be embraced. Having all these countless aspects to call a culture mine makes me proud to say I am Filipino.

I wish I was Vietnamese. Having almost all of my friends being Vietnamese, the words of not being “Asian enough” rang in my ears. My Vietnamese friends would never accept my identity of being a Filipino-American as Asian. They have the ability to strengthen their mastery of the Vietnamese language through classes to keep intact with their culture and various Vietnamese students to confine in solidarity. Confronted with my feelings of wanting to fit in, an agonizing ultimatum weighed my shoulders, to decide whether I would force myself to assimilate into their culture or embrace my identity as a Filipino-American. If I chose the former–leaving my culture behind–I would have to adopt aspects of Vietnamese culture to be “more like them.” The constant presence of Vietnamese friends has led me to feel a sense of disconnect in our friendships. My Vietnamese friends alienated me, as they held secrets from me, walked at a distance from me, and spoke Vietnamese while I could only smile and nod, just to keep people around me. Witnessing their actions of pushing me aside, I felt the desire to be accepted by those in the same ethnic group as me. Consequently, I started learning bits and pieces of their language and familiarizing myself with their traditions, Lunar New Year, Ao Dai, foods, and lion dancing. At times, I felt prideful when I was mistaken for Vietnamese. Seeing it as a sign that my efforts of assimilation were working, I realized I would be losing my identity as a Filipino. As I progressed into high school, my identity would be struck by a moment of vulnerability. Dealing with the persisting stress of social adequacy, I would lose all composure in an instance from a student saying “You’re childish, just grow up.” The day following the incident, Ms. Dano, a Filipino teacher, pulled me out of class to comfort me after finding out what occurred. As she spoke to me, tears rolled down my face as she told me “Us Filipinos need to stick out for each other, if you need someone I’m always here.” Ms.Dano would drive a passion for me to reconnect with my culture, after seeing how she’s willing to support me because we share similarities. This would drive my passion for ensuring inclusion with others, and in doing so I would become a founding officer of the organization AAPISA. Welcoming a diverse demographic of students allowed me to strive for countless of them to feel appreciated so they wouldn’t feel alienated. Though it was our first year, we were able to create an impact through club advertisements bringing our club to 50 students. Here these members would be exposed to celebrations, cultural practices, recognizing the numerous nations within Asia. Introduction to these cultures through events fuels student engagement to be eager to join us. Seeing how people are enthusiastic to expose themselves to different cultures made me feel less of an outsider, and more of someone who appreciates what's around me. Having people willing to educate themselves, developed a personal newfound sense of identity and independence. I don’t need to force myself to assimilate to hold friendships with others. Which provided me the confidence to rekindle my friendships with my Vietnamese friends, and no longer have to mold my identity into theirs but have my own. I realize how beautiful and unique my culture is with its Kamayan, Filpinanas, and lechon, which make us distinct from others and should be embraced. Having all these countless aspects to call a culture mine makes me proud to say I am Filipino.

I wish I was Vietnamese. Having almost all of my friends being Vietnamese, the words of not being “Asian enough” rang in my ears. My Vietnamese friends would never accept my identity of being a Filipino-American as Asian. They have the ability to strengthen their mastery of the Vietnamese language through classes to keep intact with their culture and various Vietnamese students to confine in solidarity. Confronted with my feelings of wanting to fit in, an agonizing ultimatum weighed my shoulders, to decide whether I would force myself to assimilate into their culture or embrace my identity as a Filipino-American. If I chose the former–leaving my culture behind–I would have to adopt aspects of Vietnamese culture to be “more like them.” The constant presence of Vietnamese friends has led me to feel a sense of disconnect in our friendships. My Vietnamese friends alienated me, as they held secrets from me, walked at a distance from me, and spoke Vietnamese while I could only smile and nod, just to keep people around me. Witnessing their actions of pushing me aside, I felt the desire to be accepted by those in the same ethnic group as me. Consequently, I started learning bits and pieces of their language and familiarizing myself with their traditions, Lunar New Year, Ao Dai, foods, and lion dancing. At times, I felt prideful when I was mistaken for Vietnamese. Seeing it as a sign that my efforts of assimilation were working, I realized I would be losing my identity as a Filipino. As I progressed into high school, my identity would be struck by a moment of vulnerability. Dealing with the persisting stress of social adequacy, I would lose all composure in an instance from a student saying “You’re childish, just grow up.” The day following the incident, Ms. Dano, a Filipino teacher, pulled me out of class to comfort me after finding out what occurred. As she spoke to me, tears rolled down my face as she told me “Us Filipinos need to stick out for each other, if you need someone I’m always here.” Ms.Dano would drive a passion for me to reconnect with my culture, after seeing how she’s willing to support me because we share similarities. This would drive my passion for ensuring inclusion with others, and in doing so I would become a founding officer of the organization AAPISA. Welcoming a diverse demographic of students allowed me to strive for countless of them to feel appreciated so they wouldn’t feel alienated. Though it was our first year, we were able to create an impact through club advertisements bringing our club to 50 students. Here these members would be exposed to celebrations, cultural practices, recognizing the numerous nations within Asia. Introduction to these cultures through events fuels student engagement to be eager to join us. Seeing how people are enthusiastic to expose themselves to different cultures made me feel less of an outsider, and more of someone who appreciates what's around me. Having people willing to educate themselves, developed a personal newfound sense of identity and independence. I don’t need to force myself to assimilate to hold friendships with others. Which provided me the confidence to rekindle my friendships with my Vietnamese friends, and no longer have to mold my identity into theirs but have my own. The insecurity of identity fades once you find peace in yourself. Find any spec of love for yourself because you’re so beautiful and blooming with life. It’s your first and only life so appreciate what’s around and grow from your experiences. Life is more than fitting in.

I wish I was Vietnamese. Having almost all of my friends being Vietnamese, the words of not being “Asian enough” rang in my ears. My Vietnamese friends would never accept my identity of being a Filipino-American as Asian. They have the ability to strengthen their mastery of the Vietnamese language through classes to keep intact with their culture and various Vietnamese students to confine in solidarity. Confronted with my feelings of wanting to fit in, an agonizing ultimatum weighed my shoulders, to decide whether I would force myself to assimilate into their culture or embrace my identity as a Filipino-American. If I chose the former–leaving my culture behind–I would have to adopt aspects of Vietnamese culture to be “more like them.” The constant presence of Vietnamese friends has led me to feel a sense of disconnect in our friendships. My Vietnamese friends alienated me, as they held secrets from me, walked at a distance from me, and spoke Vietnamese while I could only smile and nod, just to keep people around me. Witnessing their actions of pushing me aside, I felt the desire to be accepted by those in the same ethnic group as me. Consequently, I started learning bits and pieces of their language and familiarizing myself with their traditions, Lunar New Year, Ao Dai, foods, and lion dancing. At times, I felt prideful when I was mistaken for Vietnamese. Seeing it as a sign that my efforts of assimilation were working, I realized I would be losing my identity as a Filipino. As I progressed into high school, my identity would be struck by a moment of vulnerability. Dealing with the persisting stress of social adequacy, I would lose all composure in an instance from a student saying “You’re childish, just grow up.” The day following the incident, Ms. Dano, a Filipino teacher, pulled me out of class to comfort me after finding out what occurred. As she spoke to me, tears rolled down my face as she told me “Us Filipinos need to stick out for each other, if you need someone I’m always here.” Ms.Dano would drive a passion for me to reconnect with my culture, after seeing how she’s willing to support me because we share similarities. This would drive my passion for ensuring inclusion with others, and in doing so I would become a founding officer of the organization AAPISA. Welcoming a diverse demographic of students allowed me to strive for countless of them to feel appreciated so they wouldn’t feel alienated. Though it was our first year, we were able to create an impact through club advertisements bringing our club to 50 students. Here these members would be exposed to celebrations, cultural practices, recognizing the numerous nations within Asia. Introduction to these cultures through events fuels student engagement to be eager to join us. Seeing how people are enthusiastic to expose themselves to different cultures made me feel less of an outsider, and more of someone who appreciates what's around me. Having people willing to educate themselves, developed a personal newfound sense of identity and independence. I don’t need to force myself to assimilate to hold friendships with others. Which provided me the confidence to rekindle my friendships with my Vietnamese friends, and no longer have to mold my identity into theirs but have my own. I realize how beautiful and unique my culture is with its Kamayan, Filpinanas, and lechon, which make us distinct from others and should be embraced. Having all these countless aspects to call a culture mine makes me proud to say I am Filipino.

Sacrificing his dreams for his family; depriving his dreams of building his own house; and destroying his aspirations for his future self just so he could allow his brothers to go to college. My father was forced to slash his desires at a young age, leaving his home in the Philippines to seek employment in another country. Consequently, he would leave my eldest brother in the Philippines so his son would be able to have income to foster my brother's education. At the same time, my mother worked in a well-established company to provide for her family of 12. By fate, my parents would meet one another, as they both struggled to make ends meet, and my father was out of a divorce. As they grew close, they soon would get married and my mother would live with my father in Saudi Arabia. Estranged from the Philippines and dwelling in Saudi Arabia, my father would attain a contract in the United States. There, my parents decided to live their lives, knowing they would never see their family in the years of sacrifice that came with the Filipino tradition of putting family first. My parents would be happy knowing that they were working for their children to have a better chance in life and providing for their family back home. Now, my parents continue to work at the ages of 59 and 58 for lengthy hours and endure their professions, just so our family can make an income while providing the opportunity of college for my siblings. With their sacrifices to come to the United States, they strive to support both their families back in the Philippines while cultivating the home they made in the Americas. I admire this sacrifice that my parents made for my family. Though my father is emotionally absent and does not have the best father-daughter dynamic, I owe it to him and my mother who continuously supports my ambitions to succeed. My parents pushed my siblings and me to accomplish, regardless of its outcome, They were happy with the fact that we were trying our hardest. With their bountiful amounts of support, my parents would give me and my siblings as countless possibilities as they can even with a limited amount of money. My parents wanted their children to have access to possibilities to reach their dreams and beyond since they sacrificed their own. Never being able to reach their dreams, I hope to show them all their effort in providing was worth it. That one of their children will go into the horizons of Texas and conquer their goals. My current goal of pursuing education started as a goal to continually achieve high marks in my education. My high grades never felt fulfilling in showing how much I am grateful for what they had to offer, so I set my eyes on colleges. Having the possibility of stepping into a college is a step to my ultimate goal of financially supporting them, their families, and the dreams that still remain. As I reflect upon my parent's journey, their excruciating efforts, and the long sleepless nights. I strive to rise to my best and achieve my own dreams. After all, I owe it all to them.

Sacrificing his dreams for his family; depriving his dreams of building his own house; and destroying his aspirations for his future self just so he could allow his brothers to go to college. My father was forced to slash his desires at a young age, leaving his home in the Philippines to seek employment in another country. Consequently, he would leave my eldest brother in the Philippines so his son would be able to have income to foster my brother's education. At the same time, my mother worked in a well-established company to provide for her family of 12. By fate, my parents would meet one another, as they both struggled to make ends meet, and my father was out of a divorce. As they grew close, they soon would get married and my mother would live with my father in Saudi Arabia. Estranged from the Philippines and dwelling in Saudi Arabia, my father would attain a contract in the United States. There, my parents decided to live their lives, knowing they would never see their family in the years of sacrifice that came with the Filipino tradition of putting family first. My parents would be happy knowing that they were working for their children to have a better chance in life and providing for their family back home. Now, my parents continue to work at the ages of 59 and 58 for lengthy hours and endure their professions, just so our family can make an income while providing the opportunity of college for my siblings. With their sacrifices to come to the United States, they strive to support both their families back in the Philippines while cultivating the home they made in the Americas. I admire this sacrifice that my parents made for my family. Though my father is emotionally absent and does not have the best father-daughter dynamic, I owe it to him and my mother who continuously supports my ambitions to succeed. My parents pushed my siblings and me to accomplish, regardless of its outcome, They were happy with the fact that we were trying our hardest. With their bountiful amounts of support, my parents would give me and my siblings as countless possibilities as they can even with a limited amount of money. My parents wanted their children to have access to possibilities to reach their dreams and beyond since they sacrificed their own. Never being able to reach their dreams, I hope to show them all their effort in providing was worth it. That one of their children will go beyond the horizons of Texas and conquer their goals. My current goal of going beyond Texas for education started as a goal to continually achieve high marks in my education. My high grades never felt fulfilling in showing how much I am grateful for what they had to offer, so I set my eyes on high esteemed colleges. Having the possibility of stepping into an elite college, is a step to my ultimate goal of financially supporting them, their families, and the dreams that still remain. As I reflect upon my parent's journey, their excruciating efforts, and the long sleepless nights. I strive to rise to my best and achieve my own dreams. After all, I owe it all to them.

Sacrificing his dreams for his family; depriving his dreams of building his own house; and destroying his aspirations for his future self just so he could allow his brothers to go to college. My father was forced to slash his desires at a young age, leaving his home in the Philippines to seek employment in another country. Consequently, he would leave my eldest brother in the Philippines to be able to have income to foster my brother's education. At the same time, my mother worked in a well-established company to provide for her family of 12. By fate, my parents would meet one another, as they both struggled to make ends meet. My father was out of a divorce and cared for my older brother. They soon would get married and my mother would live with my father in Saudi Arabia. Estranged from the Philippines and dwelling in Saudi Arabia, my father would attain a contract in the United States. My parents decided to live their lives, knowing they would never see their family in the years of sacrifice that came with the Filipino tradition of putting family first. My parents would be happy knowing that they were working for their children to have a better chance in life and providing for their family back home. Now, they continue to work at the ages of 59 and 58 for lengthy hours and endure their professions, just so our family can make an income while providing the opportunity of college for my siblings. With their sacrifices to come to the United States, they strived to support both their families back in the Philippines while cultivating the home they made in America. I admire this sacrifice that my parents made for my family. Even though my father is emotionally absent, and does not have the best father-daughter dynamic, I owe it to him and my mother who continuously support my ambitions to succeed. My parents pushed my siblings and me to accomplish, regardless of its outcome. They were happy with the fact that we were trying our hardest. With their bountiful amount of support, my parents would give my family as countless possibilities as they can even with a limited amount of money. My parents wanted their children to have access to possibilities to reach their dreams and beyond since they sacrificed their own. They were never able to reach their dreams but I hope to show them all their effort by providing that it was worth it by having one of their children go beyond the horizons of Texas and conquer their goals. My current goal of going beyond Texas for education was to continually achieve high marks in my education. My high grades never felt fulfilling in showing how much I am grateful for what they had to offer, so I set my eyes on selective colleges. The possibility of stepping into an elite college is my ultimate goal of financially supporting them, their families, and the dreams that still remain. After that college, while majoring in chemistry, I want pursue a career of being a chemical research engineer. Having the chances of pursing that career, I’ll be able to provide my parents finance in the dreams that are remaining for them. That they can rest easy without stressing on another on of their kids and their own lives. As I reflect upon my parent's journey, their excruciating efforts, and the long sleepless nights. I strive to rise to my best and achieve my own dreams. After all, I owe it all to them.