I found that there were a lot of things in my life that I could live without. “Stuff” like new clothes and technology. Just “stuff”. Also, intangible things such as what others would think if I couldn’t live up to their expectations. The first step in any battle is understanding the beast itself. It was the feeling that I would find happiness once I was accepted and loved by everyone and the only way was through the things I could show off. They proved to do nothing but cripple my growth. They limited the possibilities of my potential. My mind is free now. As it should be. Leaving them behind, will I be lost? Doomed to fall back into this vicious cycle? I have decided to use this newfound freedom to develop my own philosophies. The philosophical side of me values thinking, but feeling was something I always had trouble with until now. I believe that we should all be capable of thinking less and feeling more when it comes to how we understand each other. These thoughts are all new to me, and I don’t know when or if my journey will ever end. Though I’m only nineteen, my mind has aged significantly over the past two years. I’m realizing what’s important to me. I value the connections I make with people more than their opinions on the clothes that I wear.

I’ve always liked drawing but I never had the passion and drive to pursue my interest or tried to take it to the next level. However, someone who has rekindled the flame that is my love for drawing. My favorite visual artist of all time and biggest influence: Kim Jung Gi. Kim Jung Gi is an artist from South Korea who is widely revered as one of the best draughtsmen in the world. He is known for his extremely accurate and detailed drawings and has an uncanny ability to draw any object/thing, in any dimension, in any perspective, straight from his head. When asked how he got so good, he said “I don’t have a photographic memory. It was just years of hard work and consistency”. Hearing him say that made it all click for me. I was never ‘good’ at drawing because I never tried to be. That lazy part of me has died and, through hard work, I have rediscovered my love for drawing. Soon after I got back into drawing and sharing my art on social media, I received a message from someone asking for a commission drawing; the fruits of my labor actually bared. I had just sold my first piece of art. I was never keen on waiting for my work to “pay off”. Seeing my progress was, and always will be, payment enough. I dream of a world where pursuing the arts is a more mainstream career path. I deeply believe that anyone can create. There is art in everything that we do and all it takes is realizing that. For that one shy person to pick up a pencil, open a program, or step up to a machine, is the only requirement to discovering those gifts and talents that they never knew they possessed.

I realized that happiness in minimalism is the secret. I didn’t know where to start until I found an amazing documentary called “Minimalism” by Joshua Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus. They speak about how their lives have changed with the implementation of minimalism. A quote by Millburn is what tied it all together: “Love people, use things. The opposite never works”. This quote was what stuck with me; I knew I was guilty. I loved things too much and when they couldn’t love me back, I searched for ones that could. Though I’ve never been one to use people, I never loved people, even strangers, the way that I should have. I realized what I needed to do, or at least where to start. I found that there were a lot of things in my life that I could live without. “Stuff” like new clothes and technology. Just “stuff”. Also, intangible things such as what others would think if I couldn’t live up to their expectations. The first step in any battle is understanding the beast itself. It was the feeling that I would find happiness once I was accepted and loved by everyone and the only way was through the things I could show off. They proved to do nothing but cripple my growth. They limited the possibilities of my potential. My mind is free now. As it should be. Leaving them behind, will I be lost? Doomed to fall back into this vicious cycle? I have decided to use this newfound freedom to develop my own philosophies. Though I’m only nineteen, my mind has aged significantly over the past two years. I’m realizing what’s important to me. I value the connections I make with people more than their opinions on the clothes that I wear.

I’ve always liked drawing but I never had the passion and drive to pursue my interest or tried to take it to the next level. However, someone who has rekindled the flame that is my love for drawing. My favorite visual artist of all time: Kim Jung Gi. Kim Jung Gi is an artist from South Korea who is widely revered as one of the best draughtsmen in the world. He is known for his extremely accurate and detailed drawings and has an uncanny ability to draw any object/thing, in any dimension, in any perspective, straight from his head. When asked how he got so good, he said “I don’t have a photographic memory. It was just years of hard work and consistency”. Hearing him say that made it all click for me. I was never ‘good’ at drawing because I never tried to be. That lazy part of me has died and, through hard work, I have rediscovered my love for drawing. Soon after I got back into drawing and sharing my art on social media, I received a message from someone asking for a commission drawing; the fruits of my labor actually bared. I had just sold my first piece of art. I was never keen on waiting for my work to “pay off”. Seeing my progress was, and always will be, payment enough. I dream of a world where pursuing the arts is a more mainstream career path. I deeply believe that anyone can create. There is art in everything that we do and all it takes is realizing that. For that one shy person to pick up a pencil, open a program, or step up to a machine, is the only requirement to discovering those gifts and talents that they never knew they possessed.

Attaining, what I believe is, true happiness. “Are you happy?” As I sat at home, with nothing but my thoughts to keep me company, for days and nights on end, I asked myself this question. “Why wouldn’t I be?” I answered as I watched the same day repeat itself over again. I wasn’t “happy” - whatever that means. Is happiness getting up every day with a smile? Is happiness sacrificing everything so that someone else can experience it? If we can’t find it in ourselves, can we find it elsewhere? In money? A new phone? Perhaps I’ll find happiness in a new pair of shoes. I kept searching, looking outwards, for things to keep me content until I grew tired of them and continued looking. Enough was never enough. Contentment is a dangerous feeling. It can disguise itself as many emotions. Contentment deceived me into thinking I was happy. I was just content. Content with living on autopilot. Content with being a side character. Content with just existing. If I slept for the rest of my life, I’d have nothing left behind to show that I was ever awake. If I was going to do anything meaningful going forward, something had to change. Your brain is the most important organ in the body. It is you. Just like any part of the body, It needs the occasional check-up. This is something that no therapist or psychologist can do as effectively as you. This process can take a few weeks or a few years. I didn’t know where to start until I found an amazing documentary called “Minimalism” by Joshua Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus. They speak about how their lives have changed with the implementation of minimalism. A quote by Millburn is what tied it all together: “Love people, use things. The opposite never works”. This quote was what stuck with me; I knew I was guilty. I loved things too much and when they couldn’t love me back, I searched for ones that could. Though I’ve never been one to use people, I never loved people, even strangers, the way that I should have. I realized what I needed to do, or at least where to start. I found that there were a lot of things in my life that I could live without. “Stuff” like new clothes and technology. Just “stuff”. Also, intangible things such as what others would think if I couldn’t live up to their expectations. The first step in any battle is understanding the beast itself. It was the feeling that I would find happiness once I was accepted and loved by everyone and the only way was through the things I could show off. They proved to do nothing but cripple my growth. They limited the possibilities of my potential. My mind is free now. As it should be. Leaving them behind, will I be lost? Doomed to fall back into this vicious cycle? I have decided to use this newfound freedom to develop my own philosophies. The philosophical side of me values thinking, but 'feeling' was something I always had trouble with until now. I believe that we should all be capable of thinking less and feeling more when it comes to how we understand each other. These thoughts are all new to me, and I don’t know when or if my journey will ever end. Though I’m only nineteen, my mind has aged significantly over the past two years. I’m realizing what’s important to me. I value the connections I make with people more than their opinions on the clothes that I wear.

A young boy from Thailand with a dream. Dropped off at a kickboxing gym at seven. A Muay Thai champion with numerous belts and accolades. Buakaw Banchamek,” The White Lotus”, a man once known as “The God of Muay Thai”, didn’t earn this title through luck. To rise to the top in kickboxing takes thousands of hours of brutally hard, bone-breaking work, and enough blood, sweat, and tears to fill an ocean. Buakaw is one of the few who was brave enough and had enough resilience and discipline to make the sacrifices necessary to become what he is today; a champion. Buakaw inspires me because, unlike myself, he came from nothing. No money and only one opportunity. Once chance to escape from poverty and give his family a good life. That being said, perseverance and hard work outmatch anything else. From a young age, he understood this and after watching a Muay Thai match at the age of seven, his journey began. Watching him fight lit the same fire in me that it did in him all those years ago. Now, in 2022, with everything going on in my life and in the world, I can’t afford to train for the same ten hours a day every day that he does, and I am limited by the equipment that I have access to. Though I’ve attended boarding school in the U.S., I live in Antigua, a small island in the Caribbean where kickboxing is not at all popular and therefore a kickboxing gym is something that the island hasn’t had the chance to see as yet. The best that I could do was go to my local gym, which hosts one singular heavy punching bag and some weights. At first, I was discouraged after seeing the limits in opportunities to break out into the sport. Then I thought, “what would Buakaw say?” He would tell me to shut up and work with what I had. There are no excuses. Punching and kicking the air is better than sitting around waiting for someone to open a kickboxing gym. Realizing this, I immediately got to work. Every day I am in the gym, the only person hitting the heavy bag, the only person with aching legs after one thousand kicks, coming home just to do it all over again the next day. Being a kickboxer in Antigua is difficult because no one will spar with you. They’re too afraid of getting hurt. But pain truly is the greatest teacher. I owe my dedication and progress to Buakaw Banchamek. Through unending adversity, he has adapted and overcame it all. This inspires me not only in kickboxing but in everything that I pursue. Nothing worth having comes easy and a dream of being the best in any field is something worth having.

Music runs my world. Though I am no musically gifted savant. Clearly, I prefer the visual arts; drawing especially. Whether I’m working on my game at soccer or kickboxing, conceptualizing a new drawing, or even writing an essay, the right song can put me in a place where I’m able to create things that I never thought were possible. Music has become a tool for me to ignite my creativity. Everything I do is art in and of itself and in my eyes, art helps art. Artists exude creative energy that I find to be contagious. Whenever I’m in desperate need of inspiration, I press play and let my creative side come alive. There are many artists that I am fond of but the one that inspires me the most is Mac Miller. What amazed me the most was seeing Mac evolve over the years. From being a careless kid making loud club music to becoming a thoughtful artist who makes songs for the soul. His most recent albums, in my opinion, are some of his best work. “Swimming”, which I interpreted as myself going through all of the good and bad things in life, and “Circles”, which focused more on the self and coming to terms with who I am. Through his thoughtful lyrics, Mac taught me what it means to be a human being. To be a part of a living, breathing world, and to understand that I do have a place in it. This is what inspires me to keep growing, to push myself beyond what I think is possible, and to be creative in all aspects of life. Mac’s lyrics about self-worth, love, happiness, and peace of mind are what motivate me to pursue these often overlooked qualities every day. After Mac’s passing in September of 2018, I felt like I owed him something for everything that he had given me over the years. I settled on a simple portrait of him. This portrait was based on the final photograph ever taken of him (which I will attach next to the drawing). My process was extremely simple and stress-free, just like he was. He was never a complicated or overthinking guy. He never wanted to be. I wanted to reflect on that in the drawing. It was done in one attempt with no erasing. It was never intended to be perfect. He knew that no one can ever be perfect and that loving who you are and what you do is the key to happiness. When I first completed the drawing, I wanted to go back in and touch it up; make it perfect. Then I said to myself “No, you’re perfect the way you are”. “Let’s get this clear. I am here. I don’t care who got next”. This is a lyric from a Mac Miller song called “Jet Fuel”. These words have become my mantra. To me, this means that it’s my turn. It’s my turn to show what I have to offer. I don’t care who thinks that they can outdo me because I won’t let them. I’m an adult in the real world now and It’s my turn to show that I’m here and that I don’t care who’s got next. What followed this project was a new series in the same style. Many different, simple portraits of other captivating artists.