Just like the changing seasons, I’m constantly evolving. As my high school experience is coming to a close, I can now reflect on the lessons I’ve learned. High school has taught me a lot about myself, and for that, I’ll forever be grateful. It’s given me the perfect opportunity to grow as a person and explore my interests. I used to be a reserved, shy, and self-conscious girl who wouldn’t dare raise her hand in class. I would never speak what was on my mind, for fear that my peers might judge or criticize me. Now, I’m no longer afraid to voice my opinion and use my voice to advocate for social change. Over these past four years, I’ve grown to become more open with my feelings and I’ve finally come to love myself for who I am, inside and out.
As an active user of social media, I’m constantly exposed to images of flat-tummy teas and women with ‘slim-thick’ bodies. While it’s not illegal to get plastic surgery, filler enhancements, or use the occasional Snapchat filter, all these images made me question myself, was I pretty enough? The Kardashians were constantly getting praised for their curves and small stomachs, this made me believe their image was the ideal body type. Feeling pressured to fit this curvy mold prompted me to change my daily routine. I started to pay more attention to my weight and I started following the tutorials of women who had managed to increase their curves. These adjustments didn’t change my body in the way I’d hoped, and they only made me feel worse about my image.
In the fall of 2021, media giant Facebook was exposed for purposely implementing an algorithm that was prone to increasing the rates of anxiety, depression, and suicide in teens. This discovery encouraged me to take a social media break. During this time I learned how important it is to look at the world around you. Everyone is looking for a sense of belonging, and social media was meant to be a tool that made the world feel more connected, but it turns out we’re more separated than ever. I have since returned to Instagram, only this time, I’m following and supporting women who inspire me to become more self-confident, without the weight loss pills or the Brazilian butt lift. People such as Lizzo and Jameela Jamil have been at the forefront of the body positivity movement. Both women use their platforms to advocate against fatphobia and call for more diversity in the model industry. I was inspired by them to create an inclusive, shame-free conversational space for me and my friends and to unpack our relationships with body image and self-worth.
On my journey of self-discovery, I have learned that regardless of if I’m blessed with the discount code for Iggy Azalea’s personal trainer, nutritionist, makeup artist, or plastic surgeon, I don’t need to change anything about myself. I’ve finally learned to accept myself, and thus letting go of these unattainable beauty standards, allowed me to develop a sense of inner peace. I began to celebrate my individuality. These stretch marks, hip dips, and acne make me unique. I’ve learned that when it comes to self-acceptance there isn’t a one size fits all answer. As long as you keep moving forwards, you’ll eventually find what you’re looking for.