Mental health became a concern after entering higher education. The juggling act I had held together in high school started to fall apart. I realized that I had to start to treat my body and mind with more patience and kindness, or there would be consequences. However, the consequences arrived all the same. An extreme wall of burnout hit me like a ton of bricks. This wall was so heavy I could hardly handle it by myself. I had to reach out to others like professors and loved ones to make them aware of this immense pressure. There was also guilt due to not having the tools to help myself even though I was studying to have the tools to help others with their mental health. This took a lot to get over, and it is a continuous battle. I had to slowly chip away at the wall by accepting myself and all the accomplishments I had already succeeded in. I had the privilege to start working fewer hours to focus more on school. I stopped isolating myself from others and rather gave myself time allowances so I no longer felt overwhelming guilt while being away from my studies. There were different imaginary liquids that I could use to fill my cup. Physical activities help my body get the movement it needs. Yummy foods to satisfy my stomach's cravings. Specific sitcoms to allow myself time to laugh. Time with friends to energize myself. I made a list of all these things so that when I was feeling low, I had a visual list I could pick from and help myself attack the wall slowly but surely. Now that I am over that period of burnout and in grad school I continue these practices. They have become habits that keep me on track. With the addition of my therapist, these methods truly help me have a rounded approach to taking care of my mental health. Mental health is all-encompassing. This is why there is not just one thing that can make you feel less burned out, but a plethora of items that can help refill your cup. It is vital to know when to advocate for yourself. Sometimes it is required that you cancel plans or switch things around so that you can make time for your mental health. In the long run, you are your greatest asset. I truly hope we all learn to treat ourselves with kindness.

My cheeks and the tip of my nose were bright red and stunk with cold as my mom ushered my brother and me into a Starbucks on the campus of the University of Minnesota. We were there because my mother had to take my brother to a medical appointment. The warm air hit our faces while the smell of coffee and pastries wafted into our nostrils. This was an exciting treat! We did not normally have money to treat all of us so this was special. Students were in every corner of this building. Either alone with headphones on to block out the world or with groups having highly animated conversations about recent lectures. As a twelve-year-old, all the hustle, bustle, and noise sent a thrill of excitement through me. My mother made an executive decision for my brother and me and bought two tall, salted caramel hot chocolates. A scene from You’ve Got Mail flashed in my head. Cups of coffee were no longer $2.95 (Ephron, 1998). My brother and I walked out with our hot chocolates in hand, our cheeks starting to gain feeling again. We both melted at the first taste of the salted caramel hot cocoa. My mother relives this moment frequently when the fall drinks drop at Starbucks, as one of the most embarrassing times in her life due to the absolute ecstatic excitement we portrayed due to the mere hot cocoa. However, I remember it as a defining moment of the changing of seasons. Summer was definitely over. Fall's harsh windy times were upon me, and winter would soon be closing in. This was also when I knew I wanted to go to college. I constantly remember seeing all those college students studying in that tiny coffee shop with the hordes of people walking in and out on their way to class. I wanted to feel the rush and importance of high education, as corny as it sounds. As a homeschooler, it gave me a glimpse at the way I wanted to feel during the beginning of my college career. The last few years have been hard not being able to order a salted caramel mocha when the fall season hits. During my high school and college years, it always gave me the boost of energy and excitement I needed to begin classes again. It helped me romanticize the process of classes and lectures that would become so mundane by the end of the year. Ordering a salted caramel mocha begins my descent into the fall season. Out come the sweaters, boots, and hats. Out comes the planner to freshen up my organization for the academic year. Out comes the memory of the first salted caramel hot cocoa on that bitterly cold fall day. I remember to slow myself down and take time to make those small memories with my family. To never take for granted even the simplest of moments. Even just a mere hot cocoa can make a difference in our lives in so many special ways. References Ephron, N. (Director). (1998) You’ve Got Mail. [Film]. Warner Brothers.

As a young child, I held a lot of regrets. You could call it “fear of missing out,” however, as a kid, I knew it was more than that. I would severely regret saying no to something because of my anxiety, or lack of knowledge of what would happen if I said yes. I couldn’t relinquish control, even at five years old. I can clearly remember repeating to myself under my breath at the playground, “do it, or you will regret it.” This is how I live bravely to this day. I cannot get rid of my fear, the anxiety, but I can still push through the fear. This has given me the ability to garnish true friendships, fulfilling jobs, and a life filled with joy. If I had not started this self-awareness at a young age, I know I would have struggled to step out of my shell and live bravely. This self-awareness has given me the ability to become a first-generation college student. This shows that a simple phrase can encourage you to live a brave and bold life; Be scared and do it anyway.

With numerous films on the books, including a 2022 rendition put out by Disney plus, it's hard to find someone who has never heard of Cheaper by the Dozen. However, this is not the book that has inspired me from my freshman of high school until now. It's the story behind the happy-go-lucky books. The incredible woman who did all she could for her children. That book is "Lillian Gilbreth: Redefining Domesticity" by Julie Des Jardins. In this biography, Des Jardins goes on to tell Lillian's story of determination. As a young woman, Lillian fought to be her own person. This tenacity gave her the opportunity to be one of the first women allowed to attend Berkeley University as well as the first woman to be allowed to give a commencement speech at her graduation. She never gave up on continuing her education either. After marriage and during the birth of her twelve children, Lillian attended graduate school to explore her curiosity in psychology and engineering. After her husband's death, she became the sole provider for her children. The engineering industry was less than welcoming to a woman, especially a mother of twelve. Lillian was not only able to keep her children provided for, but she was also able to put them all through university. This book gave me someone to admire. I had finally found a woman I desired to mirror in my life choices. She would not allow the stereotypes of her day set her back or hinder her goals. It pains me to think that she will only ever be known as the mother from Cheaper by the Dozen. However, maybe someday, she will be given the spotlight she deserves. An inspiration to a generation of women to never let anyone other than yourself define your worth.