My name is Iris and I am a 19-year-old art and design studio major at Eastern Kentucky University. I have always been interested in art as both of my parents are artists. I am still trying to find out what I want to do as a career, and it has changed a lot over the past year and a half that I have been in school. When I was younger I wanted to become a game designer, and although I am not studying for it, I am currently making a game and it has come a long way! I do not think it is something I want to do as a career, but I have enjoyed it. After taking all the art prerequisites, I have found that jewelry and metalsmithing is what I want to do the most. I have made jewelry on my own for about a year before I took a class for it. I have found that jewelry-making allows me to express myself in a more positive way than painting or drawing has done. I use painting as a means to let out all my emotions, but jewelry-making takes a new part of me that I desperately want to share with others. Once I get in the creative zone, I make an excess of jewelry that I do and probably will not wear. I would love to graduate with a degree that allows me to work in or own a jewelry shop. This scholarship money will allow me to get closer to paying off the last bit of my debt that loans do not cover. I still owe about $980 and if I do not get it paid off by the end of the spring semester, then I cannot come back in the fall. I work at the library on campus and most of my money has gone to on-campus and in-class expenses, but I am still short. The scholarships and loans I do have do not cover the cost of going to school, let alone other living expenses. I would love to continue my education, but I am afraid that I will not have the financial means to keep going. I have had five friends who have dropped out since I started going to college, all because they cannot afford it anymore. I want to prove to myself that I can make it in life and have the career I want. I want to pursue art and have a degree I can be proud of. I know most of my friends are struggling with that and now have a lot of debt and not much to show for it. I want to keep going in school and this scholarship will help me in doing that.

1. I have been an art student pretty much all of my life. Both of my parents were artists and I have found that the best way to release my thoughts and express myself is in my art. My mental health has been a huge negative aspect of my life, but being able to release my brain into something beautiful or relieving has been like therapy to me. Other people relating to my artwork have also given me a new drive for art. Whenever I go to start a new piece, I think about the recovering addicts my nana works with. She has my art hanging in her office, and when the patients she works with see my art, it is easier for them to express how they are feeling to her since there is a physical reference for them. Their words drive me to keep going. 2. I want to better my skills and have a step up when it comes to finding a career in the arts. I am not confident in finding a career without a degree. I want to be able to put my skills and my passion into works that I can live off of. Pursuing an education in art has already taught me a lot in the first year and a half, and I am excited to learn more. I also want to learn how to make jewelry in a professional setting. I have only recently begun learning how to do jewelry making and metalsmithing and taking classes on it has made me want to pursue it as a career. Although it is something I have been learning at home, metalsmithing is something that requires classes to be done properly. It also allows me to have access to materials I cannot afford on my own. 3. I already do! Within the past couple of years, I have learned to do digital art and realized that makes it easier to have an online platform if I make digital art. I have done a few digital commissions for friends and people who just enjoyed my art. I believe digital art is something I could make a career in, but I do not know if it is something I want to pursue. I enjoy the hands-on aspect of traditional art since it grounds me in my offline life. I love doing both traditional and digital art and what each medium allows me to do.

Although I have personal experiences with all three, mental health is by far the most impactful. Mental health is a big part of my family as bipolar, depression, anxiety, and ADHD are commonly found in my family. Unfortunately, I have three of the four. However, I am fortunate that I am not bipolar. My mother is, and so is my aunt and great-grandmother. Their manic episodes have destroyed their lives and have traumatized the lives of others. I lived with my mother until I was 14 and was no longer allowed in her care after that. Her bipolar and depression caused her to abuse drugs, which caused her to abuse her kids. She tore most of her house down to rebuild it while being in a manic episode, but the episode ended before she started to rebuild it. My mother is unstable and refuses to admit there is a problem so she cannot get help for it. My aunt handles her bipolar and depression by hanging out with friends, which causes her to neglect her kids. She also has ADHD but is medicated for it. The biggest thing I have noticed with my mom and aunt in their episodes is how aggressive they both get. They blame their own actions on other people, no matter their relationship to whom they are blaming. They also start and continue arguments and say how the other person is the problem. Both are manipulative in their behavior and find it easy to get people to sympathize with them. Their mental health has greatly affected mine. I have PTSD, depression, and anxiety from being in that living situation. Although these are not the only mental illnesses or disabilities I have, they do stem from being in an environment with people who are like my aunt and mother. The difference is that I have my grandmother to help me improve. I used to have severe panic attacks, triggered for whatever reason. It set me back a lot in my day-to-day life in multiple ways. The main issue currently is the difficulty finding a job since I was unable to work or get a driver's license in high school. So, I have no experience, and I'm limited in what I can apply for. However, I now rarely have panic attacks and find it easy to do things to get the experience I am looking for. I am hopeful for my future, and I am learning how to have as positive mental health as I can because I have seen how it hurts people. I know I can have the tendencies that the adults who looked after me had, but I also recognize that I cannot expect myself to handle it on my own. My grandmother, who also struggles with PTSD, has shown me that I can take control of my mental health even if I do have hard days.

I have always loved expressing myself through my jewelry. I love the gothic style but it felt financially out of reach, so it was hard to get nice jewelry that I thought suited me. After realizing I could take things I already owned, like old jewelry or toys, and recycle my findings into something I could be proud to wear. I found that I can a variety of objects and combine them into something beautiful. I became even more passionate about the jewelry I made whenever my sister and her friends were excited to get something I made. Whenever friends of mine and my sister were excited to see another set of jewelry or showed off the pieces they had gotten from me to other people, it made me feel like jewelry making was something I could pursue and succeed in. Getting complimented by people who do not know me on my jewelry is a big motivator for me as well. It shows me that what I make is something I can be proud of and that other people can be proud of. After taking a 3D design I realized that jewelry design is something I am excited to do and will focus my career towards. I enjoy doing it, and I have already made pieces people are really interested in. I am passionate about what else I can create and how people will react to my creation. I want to make jewelry that feels unique to what is already out there. I currently focus on earrings, but I am learning to branch out. I try to find ways to combine and recycle old objects or cheaper materials into something cool or attractive. I want to prove that jewelry does not need to be expensive to be beautiful. I have taken objects from gumball machines to Halloween decorations and have made them into long-term jewelry that I still actively wear. I also have recycled jewelry I already owned and gave it new life into something that I like and hope that other people would also enjoy. I also want to make jewelry that makes an impact on people. My professor, Felicia Szorad, made beautiful pieces that I saw in a gallery my freshman year that I still think about. I want to have a similar impact on those who see what I can create because I know I am capable of making incredible pieces. I like finding unique jewelry and hope to be the creator of unique jewelry that people are excited to wear.

My favorite piece of art is twitter user @percytion's piece "Friend..?" that is a redraw of @SAD-ist "Hog Hunt" animatic on YouTube. The piece interprets the character is a soft and saddened way that makes the onlooker hard to look away from the piece. The background is subtle yet detailed, and the colors all go together in a way that makes the piece perfectly come together. The dark yet soft colors makes the piece feel emotionally heavy, something that is also conveyed in the original animatic. I love the style and design of the artwork, and go back to it often to look at it. The artist and this piece specifically inspire me to make pieces that give off a similar emotionally dark vibe. When asked what my favorite art piece is, @percytion's piece always comes to mind. It's beautiful and satisfying to look at, and not enough people have seen it.