My dream version of my future self is one who lets the scars of my past shine a light for others to follow to better themselves with patience and love to a united voice for future generations to overcome pain and self-hatred.

My name is Heavenly Thompson and I feel like I have yet to impact the world. With this said, I believe the world has had an extreme impact on me and my future endeavors. My path has been one of sadness and heartbreak. Losing my mother at an immature age has taught me that life must go on and I can show others that there is love in this world. Past the cobwebs of darkness, we sometimes live in. As a high school senior in Arkansas, I found that life can be one of carefree empathy and love. We do not have to resort to violence, bullying, and keeping each other down by the heel of our boots. This past year taught me to stand up for myself and others like me. I started to voice my opinion on antibullying and how fine arts can help young Americans with mental instability. These two go hand in hand. My family has guided me to stand up for what is right. To show others that I will not be another pawn in the game of chess called life. I have spoken at the Arkansas Capitol about bullying and the technological applications that promote this sort of behavior. I do not like to speak in front of others but on that day, I stepped up to the microphone and voiced my opinion to over one hundred patrons. How my ideas will benefit the next generation. Facing my fears on this day allowed me to solidify my desire to reach out to others like me that have been victimized at the hands of technology, drugs, and violence. I will not let my voice be sequestered by the law of man and the injustices that are raging in our society. Someone must stand up and say, “It is not okay.” I plan to continue on this path by obtaining a degree as a double major in business management and creative writing. Along the way, I will obtain grants for children of traumatic events and open a psychological arts center for them. This center will give them back the voice that they are fighting so hard to find through arts and music while also providing them with a mental outlet that is lacking in our country. I will not be pushed back down into the streets of despair, and neither should they. While working with law enforcement and government officials I will make sure that the youth can once again trust and give their full worth to our society by helping it flourish in the future. Government officials must hear their voices to fight for what they want and not what the past dictates needs be done. So you see my goal is to impact the future and not to worry about who impacts me. My bravery and courage will be in the hands of tomorrow’s youth as they struggle to find their mark in the world. Giving them a place to come to and not having to worry about being judged or just being able to talk to someone without being made to can give them the confidence that I had to find on my own. Martin Luther King had his dream, but I want to take that dream and make it my reality. Mother Teresa once said, “I alone cannot change the world, but I can cast a stone across the waters and create many ripples.” I believe I did cast my stone that day in front of those people and now I am watching as it starts to ripple the waters.

Ukraine is fighting with Russia, while North Korea sits and watches the United States and makes weapons of mass destruction. Countries want to be in each other’s business. For example, the United States politicians are more worried about being in the Ukrainian disruption with Russia than dealing with the problems on our soil. One of these problems is the violence in our youth. Youth violence in the United States has been an uphill battle to climb over the past decade. This is partly due to race, gender equality, peer pressure, and what is in the media. We are taught as young Americans to hate or dislike someone just because they look different than us. An example would be: A young black man who walks down the street, society automatically looks at him as a gang banger because of his skin color, how he walks, the manner he talks in, and the way that he chooses to dress. How about the white female who dates another race? She becomes a dirty drug addict. It does not matter that they are at the top of their class, has chosen to accept others like themselves, or that are just trying to find their voice in the world dictated by hatred. This is where violence stems from a lack of knowledge and respect for the average person. Past generations have overflowed their basket of hate onto the present generation. One category for youth violence is the amount of school crime. Bullying, victimization, assault, and rape all fall under this category. Students that come from tragedy tend to be in the generational loop of either being a victim or the aggressor. How would I know? I am one of those students, a victim of the world of social anguish with having to face another day of not being good enough for society generations before we built. Bullying has taken over our school because of social media and the ease of being able to hide behind a screen while taking out aggression on others. While teachers look away, students will use technology to constantly spread rumors and pry at those less fortunate. I believe students should be taught in classrooms instead of on computer screens. Students should be given a chance to flourish with their minds in positive ways. My plan has been set in motion by the loss of my mother through a crime that she could not escape, so she decided to end all the pain. I plan to attend a four-year accredited university while pursuing a double major in business management and creative writing. Creative writing has been my outlet for pain for the past two years. While I am pursuing these degrees, I will secure government grants along with working with state government officials to open an all-inclusive center for the youth of tragedy and violence. I plan on offering counseling and educational training as well as exploring the passions of the younger generation (arts, crafts, music, poetry, literature, etc.). I would like it to be a haven for teenagers that feel like they have no place to go when they cannot express themselves. This will not be like a community center because it will be founded around pride and self-esteem along with working with law enforcement. I would like for the youth to start to trust in the law again and help combat violence within their social circles. I would like for them to take pride in themselves and their communities and be the generation to set a new path for the future.

My name is Heavenly Thompson, a senior at Mountain View High School in Mountain View, Arkansas. I grew up in a small town in Illinois. When I was not in school, I was doing housework, budgeting finances, and shopping to keep my siblings fed while making sure my mother was not drowning from her lack of willpower. I was only ten when I started to become the “at-home mom.” My dad remarried and worked three jobs to pay child support that would be squandered away on drugs and alcohol. Many times, we went without food, water, and electricity. We lived in a car and asked for charity from those around us. I was bullied and teased most of my life. We did not have the most up-to-date clothes or it would be days before we could shower. My only solace was putting my head and heart into my studies. Covid impacted my world like any other American. The only difference is that my mother would end up taking her life with drugs and alcohol minutes after I left for school. I would end up going to live with my dad and stepmom. They did what I guess you would say “normal” parents do. They let me filter through my feelings and let me be a kid. My stepmother would eventually lose her job that had worked after 11 years of trying to protect my brothers and me. It was then we decided to move to Arkansas for a fresh start for the whole family. My stepmom worked four jobs just to give us everything we needed. I started a new school (Mountain View High School) and with her advice let down my guard. I am now a thriving student with a 3.6 GPA. I won the Freedom of Speech contest and got to attend Arkansas Governor’s school. I have been accepted into Arkansas Tech for the Fall of 2023. I will be an Honor Graduate in May and have broken all barriers of self-denial and mental anguish. I plan on continuing to volunteer for my community during the summers and also studying the arts to help showcase to other children like me that there is an outlet for your pain. My career goal is to work with law enforcement to open a center for the youth of tragedies to get mental help through the fine arts. Many times our youth get caught up in our negative society that they forget who they are or what they are passionate about. There is so much going on in our world with gender equality, racial profiling, demographics, social media, etc that we lose sight of who we are. My goal for the future is to secure as many scholarships because not only did my parents take on just me but five others. I watch the struggle each day as they come home tired from working over a hundred hours a week and that is just my mom(stepmom), and still struggle. They have supported every endeavor and put their own needs aside. Why do I need this scholarship? Honestly, I don't but my parents do. They need to learn to breathe again. They need to take time to enjoy the life that is in front of them and not worry about the future. This would be my way to repay them for all the structure and love they have put into my life and the life of my siblings. Though I know that this is not what most applicants write about. It is mine and my path from the past to the future.

What do you think of when you see a thin blonde girl with blue eyes? Most people think she is a cheerleader and has been given so much in her life. I am here to prove you wrong on all accounts. Life has been the worst roller-coaster ride you could ever imagine. My name is Heavenly Thompson, a senior at Mountain View High School in Mountain View, Arkansas. Yes, I do have blonde hair and blue eyes but if you look deep into them, you will see the sadness, loss, and abandonment of a small child. I grew up in a small town in Illinois where my mother thought it was best to give into the life of being wild and free. When I was not in school, I was doing housework, budgeting finances, shopping to keep my siblings fed while making sure my mother was not drowning from her lack of willpower. I was only ten when I started to become the “at home mom.” My dad remarried and worked three jobs to pay child support that would be squandered away on drugs and alcohol. Many times, we went without food, water, and electricity. We lived in a car and have asked for charity from those around us. School would be another experience in itself. I was bullied and teased most of my life. We did not have the most up to date clothes or it would be days before we could shower. My only solace was putting my head and heart into my studies. It always bothered me hearing the hurtful words of other students. “Her dad must be in town because she finally took a shower and look, she has new clothes to wear.’ Though these words were spoken, it did not make me love my mother any less. Covid impacted my world like any other American. The only difference is that my mother would end up taking her life with drugs and alcohol minutes after I left for school. Police officers and Department of Human Services did not help my want to fit in with my peers. Sitting in an office I tried to process what had happened. I realized my universe was about to shift. But this time it was going to shift for the better than what I have had. I would end up going to live with my dad and stepmom. They did what I guess you would say “normal” parents do. Though I was not sure at the time there was a such thing as normal for my life. They let me filter through my feelings and let me be a kid. My stepmother would eventually lose her job that she had worked at after 11 years for trying to protect my brothers and I, but she did not let that get to her. It was then we decided to move to Arkansas for a fresh start for the whole family. Arkansas is where my dad stayed home, and my stepmom worked four jobs to give us everything we needed. I started a new school (Mountain View High School) and with her advice let down my guard. I am now a thriving student with a 3.6 gpa. I won the Freedom of Speech contest and got to attend Arkansas Governor’s school. I have been accepted into Arkansas Tech for the Fall of 2023. I will be an Honor Graduate in May and have broke all barriers of self denial and mental anguish. Mountain View gave me a chance to shine and really find my true calling in life and that is helping others. I plan on continuing to volunteer for my community during the summers and also studying the arts to help showcase to other children like me that there is an outlet for your pain. My career goal is to work with law enforcement to open a center for youth of tragedies to get mental help through the fine arts. So many times our youth get caught up in our negative society that they forget who they are or what they are passionate for. We have to much of trying to be someone that we are not. There is so much going on in our world with gender equality, racial profiling, demographics, social media,etc that we lose sight of who we are. My goal for the future is to secure as many scholarships because not only did my parents take on just me but five others. I watch the struggle each day as they come home tired from working over a hundred hours a week and that is just my mom(stepmom), and still struggle through bills and food. I see the pain on their faces as they fall asleep on the couch from worry and I cover them with a blanket. They have supported every endevor and put their owns needs aside. I want to relieve some of that burden. Why do I need this scholarship? Honestly, I don't but my parents do. They need to learn to breathe again. They need to take time to enjoy the life that is in front of them and not worry about the future. This would be my way to repay them for all the structure and love they have put into my life and the life of my siblings. Though I know that this is not what most applicants write about. It is mine and my path through the past to the future. Our paths are not guaranteed to be straight and perfect but how we navigate them and help others will always lead to the destination that we seek.

Honestly, I do not know why writing is important to me. I could give you a million distinct reasons why I do it but to pinpoint one single act of why I cannot. Why do we have so many beliefs on the right religion or the fact that so many people are still segregating themselves by the color of their skin? There is no real reason. I will say that writing has been an outlet for me and my feelings these past couple of years. I could have been one of those dramatic teenagers that looks at life as if it has nothing to offer me and had taken a different path than I am on now. It has helped me gain emotional strength and let me see my version of the world in a new light. Writing to me is so fluid and helps me understand those moments of anxiety and discomfort. You can say that it is my safe zone. When I think of putting pen to paper or the tap of a keyboard it is like feeding my soul one word at a time and feeling fulfilled with what I have created. My views on life are not always easy to understand. I am a seventeen-year-old female that has seen more horror than a Freddy Krueger marathon and writing is my way of escaping the horrors of my past. Though I am young and have experienced more than others, it does not mean that I am at a loss for words. I just use my words to keep the bad at bay and the good at the forefront of my mind. You may say that writing is my healing elixir but to me, it is just a coping mechanism. My writing is a way to push for the future and has helped me become socially relevant among my peers. I have gone from the shy girl wearing all black at the back of the class to now I am graduating with honors and am going to be the first in my family to attend college. Am I scared of what the future may hold for me? My answer would have to be no because I have a weapon that I can use to get through tough times. That weapon is writing and the inspiration I now get with the world that revolves around me. So, I guess you can say writing is my sidekick in life.

My passion is in volunteer work. I work at the visitor center on the weekends and during festival days. This gives me a chance to meet people from all walks of life and to be part of a community that has been so giving to my family during some difficult times. This has given me a sense of purpose and joy. I want to follow in the footsteps of the many great leaders that have come before me. Martin Luther King gave his time to the youth of Atlanta, John F. Kennedy gave to veterans his time and love and I would love to be able to put my name among these great men. What the future holds for me is a way to give back to the students that are like I was. I went through the death of my mother from addiction. I only was able to endure this hardship with the help of people that were there to listen to me and guide me through the bitterness. I want to open a community center for children that have been through similar situations. It would be centered around the arts by using them to emit emotions whether it be bright, happy or dark and reserved. I struggled with my emotions and did not know how to show my feelings. It was then that I was handed my first journal and was asked to write a story that would showcase them. My family gave me paints and an easel. I was asked to put my emotions on the canvas with no judging of whether it made sense or not. I feel like others like myself need an outlet to conquer the fears, sadness, or demons of emotions. The facility that I want to open would provide counselors and provide positive reinforcement. I plan to work with the Arkansas Board of Education and lawmakers in Arkansas to create a law against bullying in the school system. Instead of just letting them stay in the class and continue to pressure other students, there needs to be a consequence to their actions. Something as simple as being able to talk to a counselor each day about what is going on to make them take out their aggression on others. I have already started working on a plan of action for the law and who I need to talk with on this subject and I also have started researching grants for an art mental center for youth to help them work through their issue. I believe that if I can help the youth at their most vulnerable moments then we can also help curb the drug problem of the nation and also help with the prison system. If we could help the youth with positivity then they would be less prone to resort to other ways to dull their feelings.

My passion is volunteer work. I work at the visitor center for the city's Chamber of Commerce on the weekends and during festival days. This gives me a chance to meet people from all walks of life and to be part of a community that has been so giving to my family during some difficult times. This has given me a sense of purpose and joy. In the beginning, I wasn't sure that I wanted to give up my weekends for nonpaid work but now I look forward to it. I believe that volunteering has been a blessing in my life because it gave me a chance to overcome my fears and doubts about being able to socialize with a society that would judge me. I want to follow in the footsteps of the many great leaders that have come before me. Martin Luther King gave his time to the youth of Atlanta, John F. Kennedy gave to veterans his time and love. I would love to be able to put my name among these great men and say that I was a shining spot in someone's day or that I was the difference that they needed going forward. What the future holds for me is a way to give back to the students that are like I was. I went through the death of my mother from addiction. Young adults are the most vulnerable to being tempted into drug addiction because of a tragedy. They need an outlet for someone to listen to whether it be vocal or visual. I only was able to endure this hardship with the help of people that were there to listen to me and guide me through the bitterness. It was hard for me to break free of that dark world but volunteering for people that see so much potential in me lightens that heaviness in my heart. I want to open a community center for children that have been through similar situations and are having a hard time accepting the reality of the situation. It would be centered around the arts to emit emotions whether it be bright, happy or dark and reserved. Art has been a way for me to show my emotions without feeling like I was being constantly misunderstood. The feeling of putting words on a page or the stroke of the brush against a canvas let me push my emotions to a sense of release that made my burden easier to handle. Other young adults need that release and I want to be able to guide them through that process without feeling pressured to. My struggle with emotions could have taken a dark turn but the community rallied around me and helped lead me in the right direction. It was then that I was given my first journal and was asked to write a story that would showcase those harbored feelings. My family gave me paints and an easel to release the pain. I was asked to put my emotions on the canvas with no judging of whether it made sense or not. Others like myself need an outlet to conquer the fears, sadness, or demons of emotions. The facility that I want to open would provide counselors and provide positive reinforcement. I believe that if I can help the youth at their most vulnerable moments then we can also help curb the drug problem of the nation and also help with the prison system. If we could help the youth with positivity then they would be less prone to resort to other ways to dull their feelings.

My passion is volunteer work. I work at the visitor center on the weekends and during festival days. This gives me a chance to meet people from all walks of life and to be part of a community that has been so giving to my family during some difficult times. This has given me a sense of purpose and joy. I want to follow in the footsteps of the many great leaders that have come before me. Martin Luther King gave his time to the youth of Atlanta, John F. Kennedy gave to veterans his time and love and I would love to be able to put my name among these great men. What the future holds for me is a way to give back to the students that are like I was. I went through the death of my mother from addiction. I only was able to endure this hardship with the help of people that were there to listen to me and guide me through the bitterness. I want to open a community center for children that have been through similar situations. It would be centered around the arts by using them to emit emotions whether it be bright, happy or dark and reserved. I want to be able to be involved in my community with the younger generation and also to implement their faith back into a critical mindset of society. This would allow them to see that the world is not just what they have seen but what they can help others see in themselves. I struggled with my emotions and did not know how to show my feelings. It was then that I was handed my first journal and was asked to write a story that would showcase them. My family gave me paints and an easel. I was asked to put my emotions on the canvas with no judging of whether it made sense or not. I feel like others like myself need an outlet to conquer the fears, sadness, or demons of emotions. The facility that I want to open would provide counselors and provide positive reinforcement. I believe that if I can help the youth at their most vulnerable moments then we can also help curb the drug problem of the nation and also help with the prison system. If we could help the youth with positivity then they would be less prone to resort to other ways to dull their feelings.

Integrity is the ability to showcase one's nature demeanor without having to lie to oneself. My integrity lies in the truth of knowing that I am doing what is right not only for myself but for the others that are around me. George Eliot stated, "Keep true, never be ashamed of doing right, decide on what you think is right and stick to it." Honesty and Integrity are the foundation on which I base my life. Growing up in a life where everyone around me would use lies and social injustices as a way to gain social standing made me realize that I did not want to be that way. As a senior in high school, I have used honesty as a founding block for my future. I have spoken out against bullying at school and the Arkansas capitol while also making sure that my fellow students knew where I stand on the subject of lies and deception. I am honest in my classes and with my family so that they know where I stand on the subject. High school is hard enough with all of the bullying and backbiting. Some days it feels like I am in a political cage. Politicians have shown that to get what you want you have to sacrifice integrity. This is a lie and they usually end up reaping what they have sown. Voicing my opinion on a topic does not mean I have to stoop to their level. I will use my integrity to try to shape a better future for all.

Racial profiling in the United States has grown substantially over the past several decades. Although we live in a world that is made up of many different people, stereotype is always in the background. Literature has been a way to open the minds and actions of many of these diverse groups. When I think of books, I think of freedom. The freedom to express thoughts and how our feelings are intertwined with those images in the mind. It is also the freedom of speech that our country was founded on. The number one freedom that it gives us is the freedom to point out differences and problems within the boundaries of races. One book comes to mind that I believe every person should read, To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee. Harper Lee took to the pages and pointed out through the eyes of a female child how harsh can be on people of another race. She was a white female that stood up for the injustices of the black community. The main character, Scout Finch, was the daughter of a lawyer that would take on cases for any race just to prove the social injustices. It was set in Alabama which at the time the book was written (1960) was in the middle of its own voice against race. Harper Lee wanted to highlight what was going on at the time through the voice of a child to make readers understand that there is more to what is being presented in front of them. It was about making sure that everyone is treated fairly and not jumping to conclusions just because someone is not the same hue as you may be. This was the first book that spoke to my soul as an individual. It is also part of the reason that I have been working on a plan to implement for the future. Scout was understanding and wanted to make sure that citizens were treated equally, and I want to use that as a foundation for my career choice. I would like to follow in Harper Lee’s preverbal footsteps and use my writing skills to call out injustices that I see around me along with creating a foundation for youth to develop their love of one another through the arts. Harper Lee was a brave woman of her time so I must be one too by continuing towards the goal of speaking out on the issue of cyber-bullying and the effects that it has on the youth of tomorrow. I plan to create a safe creative space for young Americans where they can showcase their diversity while also healing them mentally through any scars they may have from bullying, tragedy, peer pressure or life in general. I want to use Harper Lee and her character of Scout to show that no matter what life shows you to be true does not mean you cannot rise and be a better person. So how does this book impact me? I think it impacted the world at a time when people needed to hear it. It showed that love is universal and that we can make our path to help others. We do not have to mimic the past if we want to make a more accepting future.

Racial profiling in the United States has grown substantially over the past several decades. Although we live in a world that is made up of many different people, stereotype is always in the background. Literature has been a way to open the minds and actions of many of these diverse groups. When I think of books, I think of freedom. The freedom to express thoughts and how our feelings are intertwined with those images in the mind. It is also the freedom of speech that our country was founded on. The number one freedom that it gives us is the freedom to point out differences and problems within the boundaries of races. One book comes to mind that I believe every person should read, To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee. Harper Lee took to the pages and pointed out through the eyes of a female child how harsh can be on people of another race. She was a white female that stood up for the injustices of the black community. The main character, Scout Finch, was the daughter of a lawyer that would take on cases for any race just to prove the social injustices. It was set in Alabama which at the time the book was written (1960) was in the middle of its own voice against race. Harper Lee wanted to highlight what was going on at the time through the voice of a child to make readers understand that there is more to what is being presented in front of them. It was about making sure that everyone is treated fairly and not jumping to conclusions just because someone is not the same hue as you may be. This was the first book that spoke to my soul as an individual. It is also part of the reason that I have been working on a plan to implement for the future. Scout was understanding and wanted to make sure that citizens were treated equally, and I want to use that as a foundation for my career choice. I would like to follow in Harper Lee’s preverbal footsteps and use my writing skills to call out injustices that I see around me along with creating a foundation for youth to develop their love of one another through the arts. Harper Lee was a brave woman of her time so I must be one too.

My name is Heavenly Thompson. I am a Mountain View senior at High School with a plan to attend Arkansas Tech University in Russellville, Arkansas in the fall of 2023. My aspirations for higher education in creative writing led me to choose this university. Arkansas Tech gives me a chance to have my voice heard along with pushing my creativity. My career vision also includes a minor in business management and administration and one day I plan on being an advocate for children of tragedy since I can relate to them on a personal level. Children that have had to go through heartbreak do not have as many resources as they should. I believe in connecting to them, and that others like them have overcome and succeeded in life just as I will. I believe that my journey to higher education, though bumpy and hard-pressed, can benefit my compassionate demeanor along with helping me heal my wounds. Education has become a great friend to me, and I would cherish continuing this friendship into a higher establishment of learning. My passion for creative writing will give me a chance to connect with others that are too afraid to talk about their past. Creative writing has become my source of inspiration and continues to be my outlet for my personal development. I would like to combine creative writing with business to be able to aid communities needing additional help with today’s youth. Furthermore, I would like to give back to the community that has wrapped its arms around me and accepted me despite the preverbal bruises that were sitting underneath the surface, I would like to open an artistic psychological center for teenage youth so that they can relay their own emotions. In doing so I would like to team up with local law enforcement and government agencies to help prepare the discarded youth for what the future may bring to them. My time sitting in government offices waiting for someone to come and show me compassion, while watching others that no one shows up for, had a deep impact on my choice of career fields. Children should not be a pawn of the system but should be nurtured, Cold hard benches are not always going to be in their future. I plan to be that bridge in the middle. Life brings curves and bumps but whether we slow down for them or take them full steam ahead depends on us. My path is full steam ahead and would like to be considered for this scholarship. I would appreciate any help in my goal to be a liaison to the youth of tomorrow by working toward my future today. I am committed to working hard for not only my future but what I can bring to the future generations that follow behind me. I would like your help in making this dream another accomplishment.

My name is Heavenly Thompson and I want to tell you about a disease that I struggle with on a daily basis. It is my mental health. To look at me now you would think that there is nothing wrong but, in all reality, I am battling the pain in the cobwebs of darkness. It all begins with my mother who was sick in many ways. Not only would she succumb to her addictions, but she would begin to fight the demons in her mind. This would end with her taking her own life at the age of 35. No one knows what it is like to struggle with the pain and torment of memories and shadows of times gone past. The day that she decided to end it all would be the first day of my struggle with my mental demons. My mental health was a dark hole of uncertainty and panic. The pain, heartbreak and just an unknown future would torment my dreams. I would wake up in a sweaty panic that would lead me down the road to addiction to sleeping pills. I was only 15 at the time and I could not see that I was slipping into the same swamp that she had just lost her battle with. It would take my stepmother being caring and understanding to show me the way. She would come to sleep in my bed to keep the demons at bay while reading me stories of love and understanding. She encouraged my love of writing no matter how dark and gloomy it was just to get my feelings onto paper. My turning point was when she asked me to gather up all my negative writings and come outside. She had started a fire and told me to throw them away. As I watched the ashes float to the sky her words would resonant with me. “Feelings come and go but only you can change the fire inside yourself.” Since throwing away the past I have been a thriving 3.5 GPA student with a chance to go to college as a first-generation student. My passion for the future is to help other young students that are on that treacherous path. I plan to open a creative arts center for mental health students that have no one to show them that their fire is not destined by what is inside their heads but by what is inside their hearts.

My name is Heavenly Thompson and I want to tell you about a disease that I struggle with on a daily basis. It is my mental health. To look at me now you would think that there is nothing wrong but, in all reality, I am battling the pain in the cobwebs of darkness. It all begins with my mother who was sick in many ways. Not only would she succumb to her addictions, but she would begin to fight the demons in her mind. This would end with her taking her own life at the age of 35. No one knows what it is like to struggle with the pain and torment of memories and shadows of times gone past. The day that she decided to end it all would be the first day of my struggle with my mental demons. My mental health was a dark hole of uncertainty and panic. The pain, heartbreak and just an unknown future would torment my dreams. I would wake up in a sweaty panic that would lead me down the road to addiction to sleeping pills. I was only 15 at the time and I could not see that I was slipping into the same swamp that she had just lost her battle with. It would take my stepmother being caring and understanding to show me the way. She would come to sleep in my bed to keep the demons at bay while reading me stories of love and understanding. She encouraged my love of writing no matter how dark and gloomy it was just to get my feelings onto paper. My turning point was when she asked me to gather up all my negative writings and come outside. She had started a fire and told me to throw them away. As I watched the ashes float to the sky her words would resonant with me. “Feelings come and go but only you can change the fire inside yourself.” Since throwing away the past I have been a thriving 3.5 GPA student with a chance to go to college as a first-generation student. My passion for the future is to help other young students that are on that treacherous path. I plan to open a creative arts center for mental health students that have no one to show them that their fire is not destined by what is inside their heads but by what is inside their hearts.

My name is Heavenly Thompson and I want to tell you about a disease that I struggle with on a daily basis. It is my mental health. To look at me now you would think that there is nothing wrong but, in all reality, I am battling the pain in the cobwebs of darkness. It all begins with my mother who was sick in many ways. Not only would she succumb to her addictions, but she would begin to fight the demons in her mind. This would end with her taking her own life at the age of 35. No one knows what it is like to struggle with the pain and torment of memories and shadows of times gone past. The day that she decided to end it all would be the first day of my struggle with my own mental demons. My mental health was a dark hole of uncertainty and panic. The pain, heartbreak and just an unknown future would torment my dreams. I would wake up in a sweaty panic that would lead me down the road to addiction to sleeping pills. I was only 15 at the time and I could not see that I was slipping into the same swamp that she had just lost her battle with. It would take my stepmother being caring and understanding to show me the way. She would come to sleep in my bed to keep the demons at bay while reading me stories of love and understanding. She encouraged my love of writing no matter how dark and gloomy it was just to get my feelings onto paper. My turning point was when she asked me to gather up all my negative writings and come outside. She had started a fire and told me to throw them away. As I watched the ashes float to the sky her words would resonant with me. “Feelings come and go but only you can change the fire inside yourself.” Since throwing away the past I have been a thriving 3.5 GPA student with a chance to go to college as a first-generation student. My passion for the future is to help other young students that are on that treacherous path. I then plan to open a creative arts center for mental health students that have no one to show them that their fire is not destined by what is inside their heads but by what is inside their hearts.

What do you think of when you see a thin blonde girl with blue eyes? Most people think she is a cheerleader and has been given so much in her life. I am here to prove you wrong on all accounts. Life has been the worst roller-coaster ride you could ever imagine. My name is Heavenly Thompson, a senior at Mountain View High School in Mountain View, Arkansas. Yes, I do have blonde hair and blue eyes but if you look deep into them, you will see the sadness, loss, and abandonment of a small child. I grew up in a small town in Illinois where my mother thought it was best to give in the life of being wild and free. When I was not in school, I was doing housework, budgeting finances, and shopping to keep my siblings fed while making sure my mother was not drowning from her lack of willpower. I was only ten when I started to become the “at-home mom.” My dad remarried and worked three jobs to pay child support that would be squandered away on drugs and alcohol. Many times, we went without food, water, and electricity. We lived in a car and asked for charity from those around us. School would be another experience in itself. I was bullied and teased most of my life. We did not have the most up-to-date clothes or it would be days before we could shower. My only solace was putting my head and heart into my studies. It always bothered me to hear the hurtful words of other students. “Her dad must be in town because she finally took a shower and look, she has new clothes to wear.’ Though these words were spoken, they did not make me love my mother any less. Covid impacted my world like any other American. The only difference is that my mother would end up taking her life with drugs and alcohol minutes after I left for school. Police officers and the Department of Human Services did not help my want to fit in with my peers. Sitting in an office I tried to process what had happened. I realized my universe was about to shift. I would end up going to live with my dad and stepmom. They did what I guess you would say “normal” parents do. They let me filter through my feelings and let me be a kid. My stepmother would lose her job for trying to protect my brothers and me, but she did not let that get to her. It was then we decided to move to Arkansas for a fresh start for the whole family. Arkansas is where my dad stayed home, and my stepmom worked four jobs to give us everything we needed. I started a new school and with her advice let down my guard. I am now a thriving student with a 3.5 GPA. I won the Freedom of Speech contest and got to attend Arkansas Governor’s school. I have been accepted into Arkansas Tech for the Fall of 2023. I plan on continuing to volunteer for my community during the summers and also studying the arts to help showcase to other children like me that there is an outlet for your pain. My career goal is to work with law enforcement to open a center for the youth of tragedies to get mental help through the fine arts. Our paths are not guaranteed to be straight and perfect but how we navigate them and help others will always lead to the destination that we seek.

My name is Heavenly Thompson and I feel like I have yet to make an impact on the world. With this said, I believe the world has had an extreme impact on me and my future endeavors. My path has been one of sadness and heartbreak. Losing my mother at an immature age has taught me that life must go on and that I can show others that there is love in this world past the cobwebs of darkness that we sometimes live in. As a high school senior in Arkansas, I have found that life can be one of carefree empathy and love. We do not have to resort to violence, bullying and keeping each other down with the heel of our boots. This past year taught me to stand up for myself and others like me. I started to voice my opinion on antibullying and how fine arts can help young Americans with mental instability. These two-go hand in hand. My family has guided and pushed me to stand up for what is right and to show others that I will not be another pawn in this game of chess. I have spoken at the Arkansas capitol about bullying and the technological apps that promote this sort of behavior. I do not like to speak in front of others but on that day, I took the microphone and voiced my opinion to over one hundred patrons about my ideas and how they will help the next generation. Facing my fears on that day allowed me to solidify my desire to reach out to others like me that have been victimized at the hands of technology, drugs, and violence. I will not let my voice be sequestered by the law of man and the injustices that are raging in our society. Someone needs to stand up and say, “It is not okay.” I plan to continue this path by obtaining a degree as a double major in business management and creative writing. I plan to obtain grants for children of traumatic events and open a psychological arts center for them. This center will give them back the voice that they are fighting so hard to find through arts and music while also providing them with a mental outlet that is lacking in our country. I will not be pushed back down into the streets of despair, and neither should they. While working with law enforcement and government officials I will make sure that the youth can once again trust and give their full worth to our society by helping it flourish in the future. Government officials must hear their voices to fight for what they want and not what the past dictates need be done. So, you see my goal is to impact the future and not to worry about who impacts me. My bravery and courage will be in the hands of tomorrow’s youth to find their mark in the world. By giving them a place to come to and not having to worry about being judged while being able to talk to someone without being made to, can give them the confidence that I had to find on my own. Martin Luther King had his dream, but I want to take that dream and make it my reality. Mother Teresa once said, “I alone cannot change the world, but I can cast a stone across the waters and create many ripples.” I believe I did cast my stone that day in front of those people and now I am watching as it starts to ripple the waters.

My name is Heavenly Thompson and I feel like I have yet to make an impact on the world. With this said, I believe the world has had an extreme impact on me and my future endeavors. My path has been one of sadness and heartbreak. Losing my mother at an immature age has taught me that life must go on and that I can show others that there is love in this world past the cobwebs of darkness that we sometimes live in. As a high school senior in Arkansas, I have found that life can be one of carefree empathy and love. We do not have to resort to violence, bullying and keeping each other down with the heel of our boots. This past year taught me to stand up for myself and others like me. I started to voice my opinion on antibullying and how fine arts can help young Americans with mental instability. These two-go hand in hand. My family has guided and pushed me to stand up for what is right and to show others that I will not be another pawn in the game of chess called life. I have spoken at the Arkansas capitol about bullying and the technological apps that promote this sort of behavior. I do not like to speak in front of others but on that day, I stepped up to the microphone and voiced my opinion to over one hundred patrons about my ideas and how they will help the next generation. Facing my fears on this day allowed me to solidify my desire to reach out to others like me that have been victimized at the hands of technology, drugs, and violence. I will not let my voice be sequestered by the law of man and the injustices that are raging in our society. Someone needs to stand up and say, “It is not okay.” I plan to continue this path by obtaining a degree as a double major in business management and creative writing. Along the way, I will obtain grants for children of traumatic events and open a psychological arts center for them. This center will give them back the voice that they are fighting so hard to find through arts and music while also providing them with a mental outlet that is lacking in our country. I will not be pushed back down into the streets of despair, and neither should they. While working with law enforcement and government officials I will make sure that the youth can once again trust and give their full worth to our society by helping it flourish in the future. Government officials must hear their voices to fight for what they want and not what the past dictates need be done. So, you see my goal is to impact the future and not to worry about who impacts me. My bravery and courage will be in the hands of tomorrow’s youth as they struggle to find their mark in the world. By giving them a place to come to and not having to worry about being judged or just being able to talk to someone without being made to can give them the confidence that I had to find on my own. Martin Luther King had his dream, but I want to take that dream and make it my reality. Mother Teresa once said, “I alone cannot change the world, but I can cast a stone across the waters and create many ripples.” I believe I did cast my stone that day in front of those people and now I am watching as it starts to ripple the waters.

Ukraine is fighting with Russia, while North Korea sits and watches the United States and makes weapons of mass destruction. Countries want to be in each other’s business. For example, the United States politicians are more worried about being in the Ukrainian disruption with Russia than dealing with the problems on our own soil. One of these problems is the violence in our youth. Youth violence in the United States has been an uphill battle to climb over the past decade. This is partly due to race, gender equality, peer pressure and what is in the media. We are taught as young Americans to hate or dislike someone just because they look different than us. An example would be A young black man who walks down the street, society automatically looks at him as a gang banger because of his skin color, how he walks, the manner he talks in, and the way that he chooses to dress. How about the white female that dates another race? She becomes a dirty drug addict. It does not matter that they are at the top of their class, has chosen to accept others like themselves or that they are just trying to find their voice in the world dictated by hatred. This is where violence stems from a lack of knowledge and respect for the average person. Past generations have overflowed their basket of hate onto the present generation. One category for youth violence is the amount of school crime. Bullying, victimization, assault, and rape all fall under this category. Students that come from tragedy tend to be in the generational loop of either being a victim or the aggressor. How would I know? I am one of those students, a victim of the world of social anguish with having to face another day of not being good enough for society generations before us built. Bullying has taken over our school because of social media and the ease of being able to hide behind a screen while taking out aggression on others. While teachers look away, students will use technology to constantly spread rumors and pry at those less fortunate. I believe students should be taught in classrooms instead of on computer screens. Students should be given a chance to flourish with their minds in positive ways. My plan has been set in motion by the loss of my mother through a crime that she could not escape, so she decided to end all the pain. I plan to attend a four-year accredited university while pursuing a double major in business management and creative writing. Creative writing has been my outlet for pain for the past two years. While I am pursuing these degrees, I will secure government grants along with working with state government officials to open an all-inclusive center for the youth of tragedy and violence. I plan on offering counseling and educational training as well as exploring the passions of the younger generation (arts, crafts, music, poetry, literature, etc.). I would like it to be a haven for teenagers that feel like they have no place to go when they cannot express themselves. This will not be like a community center because it will be founded around pride and self-esteem along with working with law enforcement. I would like for the youth to start to trust in the law again and help combat violence within their own social circles. I would like for them to take pride in themselves and their communities and be the generation to set a new path for the future.

What do you think of when you see a thin blonde girl with blue eyes? Most people think she is a cheerleader and has been given so much in her life. I am here to prove you wrong on all accounts. Life has been the worst roller-coaster ride you could ever imagine. My name is Heavenly Thompson, a senior at Mountain View High School in Mountain View, Arkansas. Yes, I do have blonde hair and blue eyes but if you look deep into them, you will see the sadness, loss, and abandonment of a small child. I grew up in a small town in Illinois where my mother thought it was best to give into the life of being wild and free. When I was not in school, I was doing housework, budgeting finances, and shopping to keep my siblings fed while making sure my mother was not drowning from a lack of willpower. I was only ten when I started becoming the “at-home mom.” My dad remarried and worked three jobs to pay child support that would be squandered away on drugs and alcohol. Often we went without food, water, and electricity. We lived in a car and asked for charity from those around us. School would be another experience in itself. I was bullied and teased most of my life. We did not have the most up-to-date clothes or it would be days before we could shower. My only solace was putting my head and heart into my studies. It always bothered me to hear the hurtful words of other students. “Her dad must be in town because she finally took a shower and look, she has new clothes to wear.’ Though these words were spoken, they did not make me love my mother any less. Covid impacted my world like any other American. The only difference is that my mother would end up taking her life with drugs and alcohol minutes after I left for school. Police officers and the Department of Human Services did not help my want to fit in with my peers. Sitting in an office I tried to process what had happened. I realized my universe was about to shift. I would end up going to live with my dad and stepmom. They did what I guess you would say “normal” parents do. They let me filter through my feelings and let me be a kid. My stepmother would lose her job for trying to protect my brothers and me, but she did not let that get to her. It was then we decided to move to Arkansas for a fresh start for the whole family. Arkansas is where my dad stayed home, and my stepmom worked four jobs to give us everything we needed. I started a new school and with her advice let down my guard. I am now a thriving student with a 3.5 GPA. I won the Freedom of Speech contest and got to attend Arkansas Governor’s school. I have been accepted into Arkansas Tech for the Fall of 2023. I plan on continuing to volunteer for my community during the summers and also studying the arts to help showcase to other children like me that there is an outlet for your pain. My career goal is to work with law enforcement to open a center for the youth of tragedies to get mental help through the fine arts. Our paths are not guaranteed to be straight and perfect but how we navigate them and help others will always lead to the destination that we seek.

My name is Heavenly Thompson. I am a Mountain View senior at High School with a plan to attend Arkansas Tech University in Russellville, Arkansas in the fall of 2023. My aspirations for higher education in creative writing led me to choose this university. Arkansas Tech gives me a chance to have my voice heard along with pushing my creativity. My career vision also includes a minor in business management and administration and one day I plan on being an advocate for children of tragedy since I can relate to them on a personal level. Children that have had to go through heartbreak do not have as many resources as they should. I believe in connecting to them, and that others like them have overcome and succeeded in life just as I will. I believe that my journey to higher education, though bumpy and hard-pressed, can benefit my compassionate demeanor along with helping me heal my wounds. Education has become a great friend to me, and I would cherish continuing this friendship into a higher establishment of learning. My passion for creative writing will give me a chance to connect with others that are too afraid to talk about their past. Creative writing has become my source of inspiration and continues to be my outlet for my personal development. I would like to combine creative writing with business to be able to aid communities needing additional help with today’s youth. Furthermore, I would like to give back to the community that has wrapped its arms around me and accepted me despite the preverbal bruises that were sitting underneath the surface, I would like to open an artistic psychological center for teenage youth so that they can relay their own emotions. In doing so I would like to team up with local law enforcement and government agencies to help prepare the discarded youth for what the future may bring to them. My time sitting in government offices waiting for someone to come and show me compassion, while watching others that no one shows up for, had a deep impact on my choice of career fields. Children should not be a pawn of the system but should be nurtured, Cold hard benches are not always going to be in their future. I plan to be that bridge in the middle. Life brings curves and bumps but whether we slow down for them or take them full steam ahead depends on us. My path is full steam ahead and would like to be considered for this scholarship. I would appreciate any help in my goal to be a liaison to the youth of tomorrow by working toward my future today. I am committed to working hard for not only my future but what I can bring to the future generations that follow behind me. I would like your help in making this dream another accomplishment.

My name is Heavenly Thompson. I am a Mountain View senior at High School with a plan to attend Arkansas Tech University in Russellville, Arkansas in the fall of 2023. My aspirations for higher education in creative writing led me to choose this university. Arkansas Tech gives me a chance to have my voice heard along with pushing my creativity. My career vision also includes a minor in business management and administration and one day I plan on being an advocate for children of tragedy since I can relate to them on a personal level. Children that have had to go through heartbreak do not have as many resources as they should. I believe in connecting to them, and that others like them have overcome and succeeded in life just as I will. I believe that my journey to higher education, though bumpy and hard-pressed, can benefit my compassionate demeanor along with helping me heal my wounds. Education has become a great friend to me, and I would cherish continuing this friendship into a higher establishment of learning. My passion for creative writing will give me a chance to connect with others that are too afraid to talk about their past. Creative writing has become my source of inspiration and continues to be my outlet for my personal development. I would like to combine creative writing with business to be able to aid communities needing additional help with today’s youth. Furthermore, I would like to give back to the community that has wrapped its arms around me and accepted me despite the preverbal bruises that were sitting underneath the surface, I would like to open an artistic psychological center for teenage youth so that they can relay their own emotions. In doing so I would like to team up with local law enforcement and government agencies to help prepare the discarded youth for what the future may bring to them. My time sitting in government offices waiting for someone to come and show me compassion, while watching others that no one shows up for, had a deep impact on my choice of career fields. Children should not be a pawn of the system but should be nurtured, Cold hard benches are not always going to be in their future. I plan to be that bridge in the middle. Life brings curves and bumps but whether we slow down for them or take them full steam ahead depends on us. My path is full steam ahead and would like to be considered for this scholarship. I would appreciate any help in my goal to be a liaison to the youth of tomorrow by working toward my future today. I am committed to working hard for not only my future but what I can bring to the future generations that follow behind me. I would like your help in making this dream another accomplishment.

President John F. Kennedy 1963 stood in front of political leaders from around the world in Paulskirche, Frankfurt and delivered a speech about change and its future of it. “Change is the law of life. And those who look only to the past or present are certain to miss the future.” President Kennedy was ahead of his time with his ideology and thoughts. He would put thoughts in the political minds of how mankind could look to the future in everything from technology to acceptance of others. Human society has been caught up in the past and what is happening in the present they forget to look to the future. We must look to the future to progress so as not to get stuck in an endless loop of chaos and bitterness. The future is man’s chance to show a developed mind and society. Many things need to change for the future to hold a significant contribution to a new generation. After much thought, one of the changes that I would like to see would be more people volunteering and helping others without the expectation of money. The time that we are currently living in has become reliant on money and greed. We should support one another without having to receive something for it. Picking up trash, taking our elderly to doctor’s appointments or just out, or visiting our wounded veterans are just a few of the ways that we can give back to the community. I believe that if we can show love to our fellow man then we will counteract some of the hatred that has driven mankind to imprison the love we used to have. This may not be a significant change that most people think of but it is one that we can take and utilize as a stepping stone to larger and greater things. I have already started by doing volunteer work for my local visitor center. It is a way of meeting new and unique people from all over the country. We put on local events so that the community can come together as one and enjoy each other’s company. I will continue to carry on my love of volunteerism into college and my plans. According to Google, “70 percent of volunteer work is done informally.” People would rather give money to say that they have volunteered but that defeats the purpose of getting to know the people that are around us. In my opinion, this is not considered volunteer work but more like paying to be socially accepted. People post on social media the funds that they have donated to charities to be deemed, good people. Instead of giving out money they donate their time and get to know the people that they are funding. They may make a new friend or be able to make an even more significant change in someone’s life. After college, I plan on opening a community center for children that have been affected by tragedy or hardship. This center will focus on the arts such as painting, writing, and music, or just a place to come and talk with counselors about what is going on in their life. This will provide a safe place for them to come to escape the darkness in their mind and hopefully instill in them the joy of volunteer work. As my career progresses I would like to open up more of these centers across the country and give hope to the future generation that is coming up through a world that is plagued with hatred and racism. These centers will accept everyone no matter what race, sexuality, or religious beliefs. I believe that if we can curb the mindset of the young then we can slowly change our older generation from returning to our past.

Have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror and thought about the life changes that you want to be able to do? "Man in the Mirror" by Michael Jackson is a song that speaks to me in this way. I never understood what it was going to take to change my life until my mom died. It took my stepmom telling me to believe in myself and to take charge of my own life for it to become apparent that I am the leader of my destiny. When I listen to this song in a way I am listening to my own story. I have to ask myself to change daily to make a difference not only in my life but in the lives of others that are around me. Our lives are constantly changing each day that we wake up. Nothing is ever the same and even though you may feel like you are in a redundant rut there are little pieces of the world that have changed from the day before making it different. Michael Jackson speaks to the human soul of how we can all want change but until we do something about it then it will not happen. I had to look at myself and say I want to be the change, I want to be the one to make a difference in my life to become the best that it can be.

My confidant As tears roll down my face, I feel you lay your head next to mine. You know that I am struggling with the hidden fears inside my head. You don’t have to ask questions or need to know the answers, you just want me to know that you are there for me. Ever since mom did what she did, I have struggled with the pain of having to understand why drugs mattered more than her own children. You lay beside me as I wrap my arms around you and smother your soft fur with my waterfall of sorrow. As I begin to fall asleep, you nudge closer to me and let me know that you are there and that there is nothing to be afraid of. I know that if the nightmares of the past creep in you will be there to chase them away. I awake with a startle because the haunting eyes of the past have invaded my sleep yet again. They have taken away my peaceful dreams and replaced them with shadows of doubt and frustration. As I open my eyes, I see you staring at me waiting to understand that you have never left and would be by my side through all the demons of the past. I pull you closer and the black smoke of insecurities shy away to the corners of my mind. It is like they know you are there to stand guard and protect me against the evil villains of self doubt. Sometimes I wonder if you are not a hero in disguise waiting to pounce on the first tentacle of deception and worry. As the new day dawns, I awake to a kiss and dance around the room. You like showing off that you have protected me through another night of sleeplessness and I thank you for all the love and joy you share with me each day. You have become my biggest fan and strongest confidant in the days that I feel like I am all alone. You stand your ground against the negativity and make sure that I know that you are there to fight my battle with me. I know that you will carry me through any storm because you will always be a soft bed of fur to curl up to and a compassionate listener to cry with. You have made a bed in the softness of my heart and like a dragon dared for anyone to break it. You are not considered a pet to me, but my best friend and family.

It’s Been a Long Journey Covid 2020 and all that came with it was a toll on many people’s lives. My life was no different than your average student. I was a sophomore in high school struggling to understand the online work with little to no internet much less electricity. I just wanted to be in school and do the work with my friends around. I just wanted to be normal. This would also be the year unbeknownst by me that I would lose someone important in my life, my mother. My mother struggled with addiction. She did what she could to help us get through the pandemic but it continued to consume her and eventually we would lose her to the darkness. How do you go from kissing her forehead in the morning and then being pulled out of class an hour later to being told she was gone? My world spun and I lost all footing of what it was like to be on what I thought was the right path. I would soon find out this was not the path for me. My stepmother got the call early in the morning while at work three states away. She dropped everything she was doing and rushed the six and a half hours to be there for us kids. She never thought of anything else but to get to us. The moment she arrived and wrapped her arms around me I felt safe again. It was hard to say goodbye to everything I had known for my entire life and to move leaving it all behind. She would end up losing her job because of being there for me and my siblings but that never diminished her spirit. This was a time for new beginnings for everyone. We would end up moving again to Arkansas, my stepmother’s home state but it would be the change that would alter everything I believed in. She worked four jobs to make sure that we were fed and taken care of. No matter how tired she was I always knew that I could find comfort and strength in her arms. Starting a new school is never easy no matter what financial situation you are in but it was worse for me without my mother. I did have peace in knowing that my stepmom would be there for me each and everyday waiting. She would stay up days with no sleep to make sure all our homework was done and that we were on the right track. I think she believed in us more than we ever could. I started my senior year as a good student but she kept pushing me to try new things and to break the bonds of my silence, my grief. When I finally saw what she did it was like all the chains of burden were ripped away from me and that I was finally going to achieve my dreams thanks to her. She has stayed up endless nights helping me research papers, essays, and any topic that was of interest to me not what she wanted me to be interested in. She has pushed me and I have succeeded in everything. I know that this is because I know I have her behind me like a crazed cheerleader rooting for my success. I will attend college in the fall, the first in our family and I believe it is because I have someone that is standing behind me making sure that even if I fall it will be in her arms supporting me back on my feet.

The spirit of giving is something that we all have inside of us. I have had many people help me out throughout my life and I thank them for that . I want to be one of those people that can give back just like I was given to. I want to be the first in my family to go to college, to be able to give back to my community. I lost my mother last year due to an overdose along with medical issues. This was a turning point in my life. I want to be able to not only make my dad and my stepmother proud but also get past the prejudice of how my mother died. I want to show others that you can rise above the ashes of pain and make it a positive experience. I want to be a beacon for other students like me that are struggling through the pain and keeping our heads held high to make a difference in the world that we are living in today. Our society makes my generation out to be “dumb and irresponsible.” I want to change that mindset and prove them wrong. I am a 17 year old female that could have given up on that dreaded day but I chose to push forward with my dream of going to college and being a better me. I want to be able to write about my experiences in life and to show that there is a life outside of the world of addictions. I loved my mother and who she was as a person but I also want to show the struggle that I had to go through. I am a 3.5 gpa student that excels with good classwork and the demands of school. I would like to one day own my own business where children that fall into the same category as I am can come and write about their experiences and get help for their struggles. I would like to be able to help children in the foster system get past the anger and grief by giving them channels to see the goodness there is in the world. Many children today that are left to the system feel like they have no one that cares or that they can talk to about problems. We need a system that will let them be themselves but show them that it is not all bad. My goal is to create a “no judging, no bullying, you matter system.” Yes I am young but I believe if I start now with an education and continue to speak towards a solution then we will one day have resolved with some of the injustice that is inside our system. So you asked me how this scholarship will benefit me, it will give me a chance to start towards a solution. It will enable me to go to college that my parents (dad and stepmom) are working extra hours just to afford. It will also give me a chance to let them be able to rest for a moment to be able to focus on my little brother. I believe I can do the world well, if I am only given the chance at it and it starts with me focusing on pursuing my dreams.

Can you believe it? I slipped on a banana peel again. My little brother has a bad habit of missing the waste bucket. He is like so many other teenagers these days everything goes in the trash. I have to constantly remind him that we have a waste bucket for all food products. He doesn't understand the concept that the reason we have pretty flowers is not because of the dirt that so many people buy at the store. Mom and I use the left over food to make a compost with worms so that the natural nutrients that are in the food can feed our garden. Not only does this cut down on waste in our landfills but it also helps with the produce that is on our table. There are times that our garden produces an abundance of items and we use them to take to the homeless or some of the elderly that cannot afford it because of rising costs of goods. Our nation's landfills are filled with items that can be reused and repurposed. There are so many food items that are thrown away daily that could feed many of our homeless patrons. People are so used to buying and throwing things away. They do not see the impact that they are putting on our Earth. This is one of the issues with climate change. The items that are in the landfills are creating a layer barrier on the crust of the Earth. In the summer time it is building up radiating heat. This heat is heating up the layers in the crust to the point that it is lifting up and cutting through parts of the ozone. This is what is causing the oceans to wash on land which then takes the trash out to sea. This is a direct effect on the climate of the ocean and the sea life that lives within it. How can we combat the ever growing climate change? First, use any old food as a compost for flower beds and gardens. Second, any food in cans that are about to expire donate them to a homeless shelter or food pantry. Third, recycle your cans and plastics. Really how much television do you watch in a day. Can you not cut into that time and separate a few cans or do it while you are cooking for those of you that do cook. Fourth, take a weekend and go to your local landfill and educate your children at the buildup of garbage that our generation has built up. Maybe they will help with the change of tides to help restore some of our climate by cleaning up their community. Lastly, climate change is going to be an ever lasting battle but you don't have to speed up the process when you have the ability to start to reverse it.

Another needle, another high, or was it another bottle in your hand that helped you deal with the thoughts in your mind. Thoughts that you felt like you could not control. You told me that you loved me in the daylight but in the darkness you fell back to the demon that took you from me. You didn’t even see it, the pain that was in my voice each time I tried to help. I sat and watched as the light in your eyes that was so vibrant and young, started to dim. You would sit and stare off in the distance as I tried to tell you what I was feeling. I knew that I had lost you for another minute, hour, day which would all end up being months lost without you. Could you not hear me screaming for a minute of your time? Could you not let me into your world to try and draw you out of the darkness. Why did you have to push me away? Now you are gone and I have to be the one that stays behind picking up the pieces of shattered dreams. We had so many plans and like puzzle pieces they are scattered around my room. I search them out to put it all back together. I sit and stare at your picture and wonder where it all went wrong. My tears were not enough to keep us together and now I want to know did I even matter? Today as I watch the news or listen to my stepmom talk about how many people that she deals with on a daily basis that chose addiction, my mind floats back to you, mom. I understand that it was the way out for you but why did you have to let it get so bad. Dad tried to help you but you pushed him away. Dad gave up his addiction to be there for us but you just could not let go. Could you? Today too many people like you have given into the joy of the high at the moment. What you didn't understand is that when you came off that high, it was still sitting there lurking to come to light. You were just another statistic. Another failed attempt at being there because we were not enough in your mind to step away from the evil of addiction. I just wish you would have listened. You should have reached your hand out to anyone because we all had a flashlight to lead you to the other side of your pain and darkness. Why could you not admit to being in that state and? We all saw it and we tried to cover it up for you. Now I look at your grave and wonder where I went wrong. I could easily slip into that world but I have reached my hand out and have talked about what I am feeling. Now I am talking to you mom. I will not fall into that category as another teenager that followed in their parents footsteps. I will succeed and will work with other at-risk youth to tell our story. I will make sure that we start to combat the many kids that are left behind because of their parents' addiction. I do not hate you but want you to know that I will not be defined by what I had to go through. I will not let others fall into the same category. I know that I matter whether anyone else thinks so or not. I will continue to succeed.

Crossing the tracks Have you ever felt like you are being watched because you “come from the wrong side of town.” This was my daily life growing up in a situation where the only money that we had coming in was each week when my dad’s child support payment would come in. My mom was a good mom but she had some not so good habits and for that I was always looked down on. The wrong side of the tracks for me was one of poverty, drugs, partying, and just not good choices. If you would look at me today you would judge me because I am not your typical poverty child. I don’t look like someone that would have to struggle for anything but I am here to prove you wrong. You are probably wondering how that relates to my most valued characteristic and the answer is true grit. I learned to rely on myself and my siblings to make it through each day. I value this because it showed me that I could survive and be successful. This grit would follow me to school where my success showed with my grades and achievements through hard work and dedication. I have been judged because of my name, the goodwill clothes that I wore and sometimes there wasn’t always water or electricity. The snickering behind my back, the bullying making me want to hide in the bathroom was just another reason I pushed through because I knew not everyday would be like this. But you know what! I survived despite it all even though my mother didn’t. We had no clue what was going to happen but we knew we would be put under another thumb of judgment. I held my head as high as the tears would allow and knew with my true inner grit we were going to be okay. My dad and stepmother stepped in and pushed for me to use that grit and follow my dream which is also a promise to my late mother, to keep going. They have nourished a love of writing and showing others my feelings. We still get judged by what happened that has led me to the point I am at now in my life but just like my parents, I am using my grit to keep pushing through. I believe this characteristic that has been instilled in me from a young age will carry me through some difficult situations that will be in the coming future. I want to further my education in order to be a symbol for other young adults in the future that just because you “come from the wrong side of the tracks,” doesn’t mean you have to give up. We have let society dictate for too long whether or not we can go to college. I want to prove that just like Rosa Parks on a bus who stood her ground, I will stand my ground as well and push my way through.

My Journey As I hold your hand and tell you goodbye, I didn’t realize this would be the last time. The last time I love you mom, of being able to hug you, the last time to see your face and to kiss your cheek. You would be gone by the time that I got home from school and I would not be able to tell you how my day had gone. Your face will be a lingering memory in my mind of that day. Tears roll down my face to prove that I am going to live my dream, our promise to each other before you went away. A promise to go to college and to be the first in our family to make it out. I want to prove that the society that has judged you would not have a chance to judge me. I want to break away from the stigma of a depressional societal downcline with our economy and the hardships that it takes with it. I want to be that light so when you look down on my accomplishments in Heaven you can say that “I am proud of you.” Mom, with you gone I have kept my promise and Dad has worked hard to finance the dream that you have wanted for all of your children, the dream of college. It started with a new school, new opportunities, and a drive to push further than I ever thought possible. As I finish my senior year, reflections of the past creep into my mind. I believe that your passing put me on a path that I have never thought was possible, the path to a higher education. This path of enlightenment will give me the options to my societal views and the views of society towards me. This will give me the opportunity to give back to my family that has had to live paycheck to paycheck just to put me through to my goals and dreams. I believe in the education system and the ability to change lives and give students to strive towards achievements they never thought were possible. Why do I believe that your college is the right one for me? Being the child of a struggling family I never thought it was possible to be a student after high school. After being the recipient of The Arkansas Governor's school and winning the Peace week essay contest, I began to research the schools that had a higher graduation rate and that worked with students that had a need along with a yearning for higher education. Your school gave me those answers that were left unanswered and opened my eyes to endless possibilities. I want to be heard. I want to study creative writing and show the world there is a better way through pain than just giving in to the social norm. I want to be that beacon of light that I believe your campus can give me. I am reaching my hand through the darkness and hoping that you will pull me into the light of success.

My Journey As I hold your hand and tell you goodbye, I didn’t realize this would be the last time. The last time I love you mom, of being able to hug you, the last time to see your face and to kiss your cheek. You would be gone by the time that I got home from school and I would not be able to tell you how my day had gone. Your face will be a lingering memory in my mind of that day. Tears roll down my face to prove that I am going to live my dream, our promise to each other before you went away. A promise to go to college and to be the first in our family to make it out. I want to prove that the society that has judged you would not have a chance to judge me. I want to break away from the stigma of a depressional societal downcline with our economy and the hardships that it takes with it. I want to be that light so when you look down on my accomplishments in Heaven you can say that “I am proud of you.” Mom, with you gone I have kept my promise and Dad has worked hard to finance the dream that you have wanted for all of your children, the dream of college. It started with a new school, new opportunities, and a drive to push further than I ever thought possible. As I finish my senior year, reflections of the past creep into my mind. I believe that your passing put me on a path that I have never thought was possible, the path to a higher education. This path of enlightenment will give me the options to my societal views and the views of society towards me. This will give me the opportunity to give back to my family that has had to live paycheck to paycheck just to put me through to my goals and dreams. I believe in the education system and the ability to change lives and give students to strive towards achievements they never thought were possible. Why do I believe that your college is the right one for me? Being the child of a struggling family I never thought it was possible to be a student after high school. After being the recipient of The Arkansas Governor's school and winning the Peace week essay contest, I began to research the schools that had a higher graduation rate and that worked with students that had a need along with a yearning for higher education. Your school gave me those answers that were left unanswered and opened my eyes to endless possibilities. I want to be heard. I do not want to give up fighting for my dream and what the dream my mom had for me. I want to study creative writing and show the world there is a better way through pain than just giving in to the social norm. I want to be that beacon of light that I believe can give myself and others around me. I am reaching my hand through the darkness and hoping that you will pull me into the light of success.