To start I will open up with a bit of a story, I am not comfortable with going into the details, but around mid-October of 2023, I had undergone a traumatic experience. I had been degraded in a very intense way and had lost my appetite for days losing 5 pounds within a week. I have also been known to have a pattern of catastrophic thinking which has led me to a mental space that has always led to death in some way or another. I had begun to take up meditation techniques to cope with my mental struggles, which helped, but it never seemed to be enough. Eventually, I was so suicidal to the point that I had intimate plans to go through with the deed, but luckily, I got into contact with my friend who had happened to be off work that day, and I let him know that I needed help. For context, he has also struggled with these thoughts himself and is making good progress in therapy, so I decided to talk to him about my feelings. We then took a drive to the next town over, where we discussed the situation, and he had put away my feelings of guilt and self-blame for the time being. We then had one of the most enjoyable days of our entire friendship to round off the night. That previous story may have made it sound like I found reassurance, and to a degree that was the case, but the guilt had not fully gone away. This had led to me abusing substances to feel something to get me through the pain. Unfortunately, this just created more feelings of guilt, and I ended up in a cycle where I would feel guilty, and then abuse substances to numb my mind, but the pain and guilt would immediately follow when I did this. My suicidal thoughts had gotten worse despite my friends and parents always bringing me back to where I ought to be mentally. Eventually, this addiction started to affect my health in a way that woke me up to its true nature, and I took measures to stop my addiction to this specific substance. I unfortunately had also been addicted to suicidal thoughts in the sense that just thinking about the topic would give me reasons to take those actions. I imagined it would be better if I just forced all of my problems to go away. But thankfully as of recently I am coming up on three months free of my substance addiction, and as a result, the greater mental clarity and confidence have put me in a more stable, long-term peace of mind that makes getting up in the morning and doing what is demanded of me substantially easier. I am also more aware of my triggers, and how to deal with them in a way that makes it so that I can move on if I have an intrusive thought that might cause my anxiety to throttle into overdrive. Overall having access to a good circle of people who care about you is essential as a human being, as they can make you realize the inner good that you may possess, even if your mind is telling you the opposite. But it is also required of the individual that they do the best they can with the resources available, and that they find healthy and constructive ways to cope with their situations.

"1. When you find yourself, in a morning, averse to rise, have this thought at hand: I arise to the proper business of a man: And shall I be averse to set about that work for which I was born, and for which I was brought into the universe? Have I this constitution and furniture of soul granted me by nature, that I may lie among bed-cloths and keep myself warm? But, say you, This state is the pleasanter. Were you then formed for pleasure, and not at all for action, and exercising your powers?" (Aurelius) Second Century Stoic philosopher and Statesman Marcus Aurelius penned the meditations, and this passage illustrates man's unwillingness to confront uncomfortably when necessary. Each sentence of this passage at the beginning of Book Five of The Meditations demonstrates Marcus's attitude toward what is uncomfortable, in opposition to what is necessary in a way that all human beings can relate to. The struggle to drag ourselves out of bed and do our duty, even in the face of discomfort. In the first sentence, Marcus encourages the reader to "[Keep his words in mind]." (Aurelius) regarding one's ability to get out of bed and immediately get to work, describing this behavior as "proper" and questions whether we ought to "be averse" to getting up immediately. His rebuttal to this question comes later in the passage, but for now, we get a taste of his philosophy regarding the nature of work and duty. Many people in the modern age may attribute this quote to waking up for a job and dragging yourself out of bed in time to start your shift. But when it comes to long-term principles, you will always be working on something, as in a way having nothing to do in life is just as bad as being overworked. Therefore we might apply this to our personal goals that we are putting off due to their difficulty, but doing them regardless, whether that be starting a new diet, or learning a language in our spare time. The following sentence is Marcus once again questioning whether laying in bed is better than actively working on something. The tail end of the quote mentions the fact that when we wake up from deep sleep we are warm. This is due to how our blood is gathering inside our bodies, in reaction to the sheets, and as we all know springing out of bed immediately challenges our comfort by making us feel the chill on our skin. He also mentions his "constitution" in the form of a question, implying that everyone has the capability of lying in bed too long after awakening, and is thus not conducting, "...the proper business of a man" (Aurelius). We then receive a rebuttal from an unknown character asking Marcus if the state of feeling warmth is more pleasurable, to which Marcus essentially questions the unknown individual as to whether he deserves to feel good, versus accomplishing something that day. Here Marcus makes his stance clear, illustrating that pleasure is an illusion that may get in the way of an individual reaching their goals. And though I do not imagine Marcus was referring to addictions, I can personally see parallels in the philosophy of the individual Marcus speaks with, and an addict. Both crave easy pleasures that anyone may fall victim to, and justify it with feeling pleasant. Whereas Marcus knows that though the action of immediately rising is an uncomfortable one, it was what man was made for. I'm sure the majority of people can relate to the feeling of wasting a day in bed because they were distracted by short-form content and felt terrible, for getting up so late. In opposition to a day where we have immediately gotten up and accomplished all of our most annoying tasks first, and feel incredible. Those unwilling to face the uncomfortable tasks of life that are inherent to its very experience will flounder in mediocrity to chase easy pleasures. This is once again in opposition to those who do things that suck in the moment, and have the motivation to do what is difficult when life presents the challenge. Ultimately, though the school of Stoicism existed at a time in history that had been particularly difficult for the average person to live through, these lessons of steely virtue will persist and be relevant as long as there are those who awake from their slumber.

Education will change my path forward in life by allowing me to get the credentials/ certification I need to work in the historical field. Since I was a sophomore in high school I had an epiphany that I would eventually like to work in history. Whether that be teaching, being a historian, or archivist. By obtaining further education in this field, and the methods of research beyond my two years of college I will be able to potentially get a job working at an institution where I have access to the necessary resources to conduct said research. And though not as important as the actual knowledge itself, in a more selfish, and career-oriented way, receiving an education, and the doctoral degree associated with history will enhance the credibility of whatever I am working on. Having a high-level degree like a doctorate, will also more than likely open up further career opportunities and higher pay at said careers. As far as giving back to society is concerned, people must have access to the knowledge of history, not necessarily to prevent something bad from happening prematurely, but to have a better understanding of how human societies function and interact in the world. Undoubtedly having a better understanding of the human condition, on both micro and macro scales in the world is as useful as it is interesting. For example, while the Thirty Years War may have happened several centuries ago, due to the brutality of this war especially in Germany, Europe had to adopt the idea of religious tolerance to keep a degree of stability on the continent. Something as simple as respecting someone else's beliefs regarding the divine may seem intuitive to us who grew up in the Western Culture, but of course, that was not always the case, and it is important to know where, and why these collective inactions of social contracts originated from. By collaborating with other historians, and specialist researchers I hope to one day contribute to the collective knowledge that is available to us currently. As far as enactment of the distribution of this knowledge is concerned; I intend to either teach, write for academic journals, and or publish a book on the subject of history. By using previous research, collaborating with other historians, and utilizing primary sources I will be able to approach my goals of spreading knowledge of the past realistically, and perhaps have my work consulted by those who require insight for research projects of their own.

On the topic of mental health, and suicide, in the past couple of years, me and a close friend of mine, have required each other’s assistance, when it comes to the topic of mental health and suicide specifically. The last time he tried I was approaching the end of the fall semester of my sophomore year of college. I had tried my best to talk him out of it, but thankfully his sister caught him trying to hang himself from the ceiling fan and saved him just in time. After that, he began to attend therapy and has noticeably made progress through that medium. I, on the other hand, had experienced a traumatic event that occurred in October of last year, and, without going into the details; I had concluded that the only way to get out of this mental situation was to take my own life. I had probably spent around 4 months milling over this idea, not being able to eat some days, in addition to getting so nervous and shaky that I vomited one time. Eventually, I decided that I would do it on a certain day, and I was incredibly worried about actually committing the act. Thankfully I had reached out to the friend I had previously mentioned and picked him up from a mutual friend/ co-worker’s house. Thankfully he was able to de-escalate me, whilst we drove to a nearby town to get garlic knots. After actually speaking about my issue, we ended up having one of the best days of our friendship and leaving on a really good note. That being said, we both still struggle with these thoughts from time to time, but we are both improving constantly and helping each other where we can. We’ve recognized that a trigger for getting onto these negative thought patterns is the desire to disappear, so I am forever grateful that I have someone like him (and my parents) in my life to promote a more upbeat and less extreme view of life and the human experience. For the most part, I have been sticking to mindfulness, and meditation to ease my catastrophic thoughts, though my parents have mentioned the idea of going to therapy on multiple occasions, and I am considering it as an option for myself once I move to Minnesota. I will continue to keep in good contact with my friend, as talking to someone is what has saved my life, and undoubtedly the lives of others before me.

What a time to be reflecting on these things, since I intend on visiting the people who performed at the first show I attended; Embryonic Devourment. This is especially fun for me as the first time I interacted with this band, it was entirely unintentional, yet I had already known them in a way. At the time I and the frontman's girlfreind had both worked at the same grocery store, and I noticed that she had a shirt from the first album by the Tampa Florida death metal band Death. From there we found out that we had a very similar taste in music and the various sub-genres of metal music. Further along into that year, I had been walking the town and encountered a poster displaying that local death metal bands would be performing at an axe throwing range that had recently opened up. I invited some friends who are not as into metal as I am to the show. Regardless we piled into this crowded room with fog, strobes, and lasers going. But I was taken by surprise, as I ran into my friend who told me that her boyfriend was the frontman for the opening band, and introduced me to him. After that interaction, I met back up with my friends to enjoy some Roy Rogers, as we were all 18 at the time, and listen to the pounding music. It was awesome for me to be at an event where I was around people who shared my interest in extreme metal and head-banging to the beat despite my lack of long hair. I was in a place I had been mentally picturing being at as a teenager headbanging and air guitaring when I thought my parents weren’t looking to Slayer, Death, and Venom among other bands. Despite being a small venue, there was a mosh pit that had opened in front of the stage, and it was expected to be popping off for the last band Narcotic Wasteland to play, as they were filming a music video, which I was briefly in at the last second. A lot of anticipation had been building in my mind, as to whether or not I should get into the pit and risk getting injured, or not. At the time I was 6 '2, and 140 pounds, so there was no way I was going to be able to push anyone around, but I eventually made my way into the pit, and it enhanced my experience so much. Despite how sweaty it got, and how bruised up and sore I was the next day at work, the fun of shoving, and bumping into other people + the wall of death made it so entertaining. At work that next day I reconnected with my friend, and she was genuinely so happy, that a band she is heavily involved in had been playing at my first metal show experience, and as a result, our friendship drew ever closer.

I am interested in pursuing history because it is a topic that is a series of tubes, and rabbit holes that one can easily fall into, and embrace. To be more specific, when I had to lock in during my stint at my local community college in multiple history classes I was required to use a set number of primary sources, and peer-reviewed journal articles to meet the parameters for a project. Often I would find links to primary sources within these academic pieces, and I could see how different authors had interpreted the primary sources, and why they were significant, and thus get a better picture of the situation. The last major project I worked on for college involved the opium trade in the early modern period, and it was interesting to see the different uses, laws, and trade records that had been involved in India and China during this period. In addition to the external players that the two states shared, and the issues that had been brought on by these foreign adversaries, the two cultures differed significantly in their use of the poppy. That being a bit of a tangent in its own right gets my point across, since a single very specific topic such as the one mentioned above demonstrates that evidence and sources relating to events can reveal the bigger picture regarding, why events in history occur, why they can/ and will likely happen again when similar components to an event are replicated unintentionally, due the nature of humanity’s imperfect condition. By bringing both my current and future skillset, in addition to my evident passion for the subject of history, I hope to one day educate one way or another. Whether that be archiving and museum work, being a professor, or if I may be so bold, eventually writing a book about a particular subject that I had taken the time to achieve expert status in. Related to history is the field of linguistics, which I plan to use as a motivator to become proficient in multiple languages. I am primarily interested in the Abrahamic Religions, so looking into languages like Arabic, Aramaic, Hebrew, and Greek would be worth my while. Once I have all of the necessary skills, and have established an expert status in the area of history which I decide to base my career around, I expect to get an insane amount of personal fulfillment knowing that the work I am doing is benefiting the common knowledge of humanity and creating a more aware populous.

The career path that I have begun on since my sophomore year of high school was the goal of being a research historian. The current steps I have taken toward this goal were to attend community college in my home in Mendocino County California to get enough transferable credits in my chosen field of history. Through the course work and education I received at Mendocino College I learned some things about the actual topics (I knew a lot already since watching documentaries and videos about history is a big hobby of mine) but I felt that I learned more in terms of applicable skills like being able to differentiate between primary, secondary, and tertiary sources when working on projects. In addition to being able to find primary sources for topics through the internet, a task that is oftentimes easier said than done. I still practice some of these skills whenever I get the inclination regarding a people group or a particular period and region that I need to brush up on. For example, I found a source written by a Jewish Spaniard regarding a nomadic group in Eurasia called the Kahzars originally published in the 12th century. These skills are also useful when you don’t feel like paying for a compiled work that is beyond copyright law. For example, for a time I had accessed the works of the Sufi mystic Jahulladin Rumi, and seeing his Persian poetry translated into English is a marvel. Though these skills will undoubtedly help me in a future historical job, I will likely have to learn new languages to do higher-level historical work. Since I have a bit of a fascination with the history of the Abrahamic religions, I hope to one day learn a passable amount of Hebrew, Greek, and Arabic, in addition to continuing my education in Spanish. Through this knowledge of other languages, I will have a broader template of perspectives to work with while reading primary sources, and it may open up future endeavors to work and research internationally. Not to mention the personal fulfillment that I will get out of such a career regardless of the pay, or even if I were to work in a small museum like the one that exists in my hometown I would feel incredibly blessed. To summarize, this field has and will likely continue to supply me with applicable skills that will help me in a future historical career.

It is a small-scale thing, but recently I have been helping a couple of my friends talk things out regarding their depressive thoughts and anxious tendencies. For the friend with depressive thoughts what seems to be the best thing we can do for each other is to talk it out. He goes to therapy now and has had suicidal inclinations in the past, so helping each other is a big deal whenever we do hang out, and the topic directs itself to these feelings. My other friend on the other hand has had major anxiety attacks throughout his life, and while it doesn't work for everyone, I recommended meditation and journaling as forms of expression that have previously helped me put my feelings into perspective. However, this does not go one way, as they have both helped me through tough mental situations in the past. While my intentions for my future career are not in the psychological fields, I do hope that if I were to at some point become a father I would be able to provide for my child if they have run into similar issues as me, and want to seek out therapy and medication as a way to manage their negative mental health.

I met my best friend Caleb in the fall semester of 2008, we were both 5 years old and in kindergarten. Growing up going to church I happened to only have friends that were girls, so I decided to walk up to every girl in my class and ask if they wanted to be my friend. I got turned down every time, so I decided to ask the first guy I saw if he wanted to be my friend, and it happened to be Caleb. From then on we started hanging out at school, but didn’t truly visit each other's houses till we were 10. I also happened to be friends with his cousin so we spent some time with him as well. We would often play video games around this time and just enjoy each other's company. Our favorites were Lego Batman, Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas, and Farcry 4. We had also seen each other at church every Sunday and would have long talks waiting for our parents to take us home. Our dads are also friends, so that played a big role in how we regarded and communicated the similarities with the relationships we have with our dads. His Dad worked the night shift at a pallet mill for a time, and so it was difficult for them to visit growing up. My Dad to this day will spend the summer away from me and my Mom falling trees within California’s fires, so we had that shared struggle in the sense of missing our Dad’s for long portions of time. This cycle continued for several years till February 2021 when he turned 18, and was able to drive us around due to having a license. We had both gotten our separate retail jobs at the time and were taking these drives while talking about life, and where it was taking us, in addition to this our conversations matured. Well at least in theory they did. Essentially this friendship means a lot to me because of the time investment that we both put into it. Of course, we had some pretty major disagreements with each other, over the long run, but we’ve always made up. We’ve always been there for each other, whether it was for advice, having to help run garbage to the local dump, split wood, fix vehicle issues, etc. Though it was never really said until recently while I was leaving early from a New Year's Eve party, the man had drunkenly told me that, “[I] was the little brother that he never had.” That meant a lot to me personally, even though I hadn’t said it to him that night, and that the feeling was mutual.

One area of my life that I am constantly fixated on, even while I am just going about my menial tasks at work or winding down for the day is fitness and nutrition. I am always thinking about how a certain type of training would benefit my hypertrophic response, and help put size onto my frame. Relating to this is how I manage my bulks, what I plan on doing after I've built enough fat and muscle, how hard I'll have to cut .ect. I also enjoy learning about the more scientific aspects of nutrition work. Like what foods increase testosterone, what supplements like D3 help decrease myostatin, and how slowing the eccentric motion of an exercise will give you a bigger growth stimulus as opposed to just dropping the weight Besides these aspects of this hobby that I find interesting, it has helped me feel more purposeful and mentally healthy. I also originally started training about one year ago with a group of friends from work, and this shared interest helped us grow closer together. Learning from each other and pushing ourselves to do better after every session. Eventually, we had to go down separate paths due to scheduling conflicts. However, I got another group of friends to start weight training and used my knowledge about workout splits to get them into the swing of things. I had even gone supplement shopping with one of the guys to get pre-workout and protein powder because he wanted me to help him pick one out. To lean a little more about the personal aspects of developing this physique, I had always been weak before I had started a proper bulk. In tandem with the "newbie gains" that I retained, I blew up over a year, gaining about 40 pounds overall. Though I have a bit of fat on the lower part of my stomach, all I see is future potential. While it's a bit corny it is about the journey more so than the destination for me, and I wish to continue progressing in this area of life as long as I possibly can

I believe that the ultimate path to success is knowing what personal discipline is, and holding yourself accountable to those standards. What I would describe as a discipline would be doing things that you’d maybe rather not do at that moment, but trying anyway. A lot of factors work in tandem with discipline, but I think that work ethic, consistency, and what the author Brian Tracey would call, “Eating the Frog” are all involved in discipline. These factors influence discipline and help pave the path to success for all individuals. Though specifically for me, I will give an example for each category so that I may hopefully show that this opportunity won’t be wasted on me. The first is work ethic. Work ethic is giving your absolute best effort to any given situation even if the results aren’t immediately evident. People who give their all in the gym will have the greatest physique outcomes. People who give it their all at their job will get promoted, and people who try their best at learning new things inside or outside of education will have a greater understanding compared to people who might only give half or three-quarters of the effort. All three are examples that have come up in my life, but I believe that the educational accomplishments that I have achieved in college prove how this opportunity can help me since I bring quality work to all of my assignments, and as a result, have a 3.9 GPA that reflects this fact. Through this opportunity, I can continue my work on getting my BA, MA, and eventually future career in history. Next is consistency. Consistency is the practice of doing something while holding a high standard for yourself habitually. I believe hearing from someone I know that it takes 66 days for an activity to become habitual. In reality, doing anything for that amount of time is realistic for most people to achieve if they put their mind to it. Doing repeated activities also builds a level of expertise that will compound the effects of these consistent efforts. Through making activities habitual, and repeated practice I have progressed in my efficiency both at work and in the gym. Becoming faster and more efficient at my job, and watching the number on the weights I use go up show that if I keep pushing myself I can keep achieving success despite the challenges that may arise. Lastly is “eating the frog.” This concept purports that doing the most difficult task on any given day first will be the best decision since you won't be bothered by that task being on your mind while you try to do smaller tasks. This is a productivity enhancer that I discovered post-community college, so I haven’t quite gotten the opportunity to use it in an educational sense, but it is still quite useful. Applying for colleges and scholarships can be a very draining process, but when I just wake up, and get them done I feel like I’ve conquered a major goal, and made a very good decision for the day. These factors of discipline I believe make me a perfect candidate for this opportunity to put these funds toward education and cause my success objectives to snowball.

One of the websites that I use on occasion to sharpen my skills in finding primary sources is Fordham University's “Internet History Sourcebooks Project.” This tool allows me to sort through various eras of history and find primary sources for specific civilizations, or descriptions of civilizations. I’m sure that I have at some point used it in my community college courses as part of an assignment, or to complete a project. One window I’ve had open for months but have yet to get around to (I will practice finding information since it is often a tedious process) is the English translation of “The Kuzari” by Judah Haveli, a medieval historian from what is now Spain writing about a nomadic people who lived on the Eurasian Steppe around Ukraine. This sourcebook has led me to other sourcebooks that allowed me to discover The Kuzari in the long and short of it. Another online resource I have used in my studies is the online archive JSTOR. Everything on JSTOR is peer-reviewed so even if there are mostly secondary sources when it comes to academic papers on historical topics they are incredibly useful. JSTOR can also lead me down rabbit holes of sources since the articles’ bibliography section will often have primary sources or other secondary sources that I can interpret on my own, or take on other perspectives regarding a topic to enhance my research papers. Google Scholar is very similar to JSTOR, though you will often have to check the institution’s website to see if the articles and resources you find have been peer-reviewed, but regardless it is still very useful. What I will give Google Scholar the edge over JSTOR is the fact that the articles that get published seem to be more recent, and thus the pictures are often directly uploaded and of higher quality, while JSTOR will usually have scans in black and white. Relating to this, some of the articles may not have information that is necessarily up to date, relative to the modern consensus of historians within the last 10 to 20 years, so not everything you find is entirely useful. Google Books and The Internet Archive are also incredibly useful since they will often be the outcomes of the previous research in search of primary sources since they will have full scans of historical books available for free. From there I can just use the control-f feature on the computer and find the information/ section/ chapter that will be necessary for quotation, or give more context to the research I’ve already done for whatever project I’m working on.

I can relate many tales of personal experience regarding the importance of diversity of thought on college campuses. Part of what had helped was the fact that I and this other student shared the same critical thinking class, so we were both in a fairly philosophical mood. We helped each other with essays, but along the way, we had very productive conversations regarding the nature of history and aspects of society. Multiple times during that particular semester we had to argue points by majority consensus, and the group I had been around had brought up things ranging from what is the best RPG video game to whether or not being wealthy makes you less empathetic. Regardless, of whether or not my opinions changed I feel that these unprompted discussions sharpened me as a person, and without freedom of speech, I would not be able to be open about topics that might be considered taboo. We must preserve this right because, in reality, it boils down to a simple question; Do you want to live under fascism? Seriously, assaults on the people’s ability to congregate peaceably, discuss uncomfortable/ controversial topics, and practice their convictions without infringing on the rights of others is an assault made against the backbone of a democratic system. Under a system with no freedom of speech, there would be no intellectual discussions about the nature of humanity, or societal consequences. The truth would not be something that we can decide amongst ourselves, but rather whatever the party or supreme leader determines to be the truth, regardless of the reality of the situation. While I have not practiced mock trial since I was a high school junior, the case had been designed so that the prosecution and defense could both argue their points depending on how the argument had been argued in a courtroom before a judge. In our efforts to practice, we methodically analyzed the case from every angle and departed rigorously amongst ourselves so that we would be sharp for our designated court appearances. Without deliberation in our court systems, we cannot fairly determine the innocence of a person, which is the point of the jury. Circling back to my question of fascism, free speech, and our courts are inseparable since without these basic principles of freedom every court becomes a kangaroo court. On a more macro-scale, the profession I plan to dedicate my life to is history, and while we might not be able to learn perfectly from the past to prevent a nasty future, it is undoubtedly worth our consideration. While it wouldn’t be my job to declare beliefs based on history as that is the job of a theorist and not a historian. Presenting objective facts to the masses, and overall expanding our knowledge of the flow of power, I believe will make society more aware of the consequences of abandoning free speech, and hopefully allow people to realize how necessary it is.

If I had the option to make everyone in the world read just one book I would have them read The Divine Comedy by Dante Alighieri. The book is three separate books that all combine into one story, Inferno being the most famous, along with Purgatorio and Paradiso. This book is an amazing story that shows the author’s personal biases, reflects the period of multiple states in Italy, and foreshadows the European Renaissance. It is called The Divine Comedy because I believe at the time comedy referred to a story that was predictable rather than something funny. Since Dante in the story was on a mission from God and this was written in the High Middle Ages it makes sense that the story would end with him eventually succeeding. How this book parallels the real-world event of the Renaissance is the blending of elements of Classical Antiquity with Christianity. Dante is guided by the Roman poet Virgil and encounters Charon, and Cerberus from Greek mythology while he is traveling through Hell for example. Though he also encounters Lucifer, Judas, angels, and eventually God at the end of the story. These three stories all have some sort of structure along the way, each of the three levels that Dante travels through has multiple layers with their symbolism, along with Christian and Classical imagery which all coalesce to form aspects of the story throughout. Overall this book is important because it is the written form of a lot of the art that came around during the later Renaissance. The wood block carvings that were later made of the story are also visually stunning and help transport you into that world.

I became interested in history because I had a very good teacher in middle school though I did not initially want to make it my career. I became very political and thought it was a shame that people weren’t learning lessons from history. While I later became less politically active with my interpretations of history, the fascination that I had developed with the past never left me. I began consuming as much media as I could regarding various topics in history. This passion has allowed me to be able to know the interests of the people in my life more intimately and has overall brought me closer to them. Unfortunately, I have realized over the last couple of years of going to my local community college for this field of study that the breadth of what I could find interesting is very broad. I think now though, that I would eventually like to become a researcher for classical history as I find those centuries particularly interesting. The political players, the battles, the political intrigue, and even the day-to-day things that weren’t world-altering regarding what we can learn about people who lived in the past through these primary accounts. That being said I doubt that I can be a historian of the classics in The United States, or live somewhere away from a city while looking at these specific sources. But I don’t mind since I am interested in basically all of history and the world’s cultures and would take great care to read and interpret documents to the best of my ability wherever I end up working. I had volunteered at a local museum in my area to get an internship, as it was a requirement for my general education pre-covid. It was an amazing experience since I got to see the backroom of the museum which had lots of artifacts that weren’t on display in the museum proper. I saw a room with many binders as well and it was a whole other experience even though I never had the chance to read any of them. And even though the work I was doing wasn’t necessarily history-related, painting wood planks while surrounded by all of this local history was amazing. Overall I think that my passion and enthusiasm alone for a variety of topics in history, while broad, will end up helping me secure a position at a museum, or an archive in the future. I am also considering learning new languages, as this would be a great opportunity to eventually expand, and make me a more in demand person to work with. Writing academic articles, and perhaps even a book is also a goal that I might want to go for after about a decade of experience.

One way in which I have improved over the past year is by taking inspiration from my friends in order to further my self-improvement goals. More specifically, I had made a bet with one of my friends who attends the same community college as me that if he had gotten through his first semester of college with only Bs and As, I would push myself to go to the gym. I had only been working out on my periods for winter break and the like since I had believed that I couldn’t engage in exercise while doing school. Through the encouragement of the other people who I would eventually end up going to the gym with, my goal eventually ended up shifting from only paying for one month during my downtime, to eventually just going for it. What has changed is my own effort, and the stress that my muscles endured, in addition to my change in diet, and therefore weight gain. I had always been skinny with a high metabolism, so I had to alter my diet to compensate, this included double portions of food in addition to food that will help me gain weight faster. Foods like avocado, tuna, oatmeal, cream of wheat, and lots of fruit juice and milk. As a result, I gained around five pounds as of the two weeks that I have been bulking for the gym. The stress that my muscles experienced is also notable since I had never experienced the discomfort of that first week, only for the repairs and subsequent sessions to be easier on the muscles (though I just may not be pushing myself enough). One thing that hasn’t changed is my drive. I have always wanted to take the time and bulk up in order to get the body of a Greek God, but my own motivation and self-doubt was hindering me from doing what I felt I needed to do. The support of having multiple people push, and coach me is also a supplement to the continued drive that I have to get in shape. What I have learned even in this short period of time is absolutely insane. How to do various exercises, organize my day around work, the gym, and when I get back into the swing of things schoolwork as well. It was basically the greatest help in pushing me to improve my time management, something I’ve struggled with due to having ADHD. This application of discipline I hope will eventually spread to other aspects of my life in order to help my mental health in tandem with my physical health.

My name is Heath, and I have been interested in studying history in an academic context for the better part of three years at this point. Though after studying history at my community college, I have begun to realize the phrase, “Those who don’t remember history are doomed to repeat it” is somewhat of a moot point since many of the actions that individuals have made throughout history seem to re-occur regardless of their historical knowledge, but I digress. The bottom line is that not only is studying history, poly sci., archeology, and anthropology fascinating, but it gives us a glimpse into our shared human culture, in addition to giving us a better idea of how our ancestors before us had lived. Through my own study of these fields in various ways, I have realized many similarities in aspects of human societies that appear regardless of culture. Recently I had to come up with a project for a world history class that had an end date of 1500 CE. For this specific project, I decided to focus on toys that were around in ancient times. Regardless of the part of the world, in Eastern Europe, Iran, India, Greece, and Central America clay/ terracotta toys with wooden axles and wheels appeared. Some of them were argued to be used for religious purposes depending on the culture, but the overall design was the same across the board. This same class had a mid-term that involved comparing how Rome and China's Han dynasty had experienced similar turmoils based on various factors. Like the introduction of new religions, civil wars, emperors who did not have the experience/ qualifications to rule, usurpers exploiting power vacuums, and attacks from foreign threats that weakened the stability and caused their downfall over a lengthy period of time. These are examples that affected the people in these nations, and times on a much more macro level compared to the toys, but it continues to demonstrate that humanity is capable of once again committing to similar behavior regardless of the culture. These realizations of the shared aspects of humanity will benefit all of us overall if not to prevent negative outcomes in the future, which is not a likely possibility. Then at the very least as individuals, we may hopefully take the time to realize and respect each other as fellow human beings, and in fact see that we aren’t so different even if we act, look, dress, and believe in different ways. These realizations also continue to give us a better basis for writing/ interpreting how we see history in an academic context by finding similarities, and bridging gaps in order to provide all of humanity with a more whole understanding of our own nature of being.

An era of history that I am particularly passionate about is the era of the Roman Empire, the major lesson that we can learn from this era is that representation of the people, with term limits, is valuable because relying on the random chance that the ruler for life turns out good leads to disaster. This doesn't necessarily apply to just The Roman Empire, but the succession system that it implemented created many more issues. The thing is Rome had a bit of an insidious tradition of military leaders marching on its capital and declaring themselves Dictator/ Emperor. Sulla, Julius Caesar, Octavian/ Agustus, and Constantine were all notable leaders who made the decision to march on Rome and took power from what they had believed to be either ineffective senators, corrupt leadership, rival usurpers, or a mix of all three. Though they were all men who had incredible experience in the military, were beloved by their men, and had the administrative capabilities to match their military prowess. That being said, when this was not the case it had nearly torn the empire asunder, had it not been for the efforts of Aurelian during the third century (Roman Empire .net). Usurpers like Maximenos Thrax, Pupienos, Ballbinus, Zenobia, and Postumus, just to name a few, had taken power in different regions of the empire after the death of Severus Alexander, a relatively young emperor who had been manipulated by his mother. (Livius: Land: Wasson). The crisis of the third century is the prime example of why this succession issue is so pronounced because it nearly caused the end of the empire 200 years early. Through the efforts once again of Aurelian, Diocletian, and Constantine (Roman Empire .net: Piranesi in Rome: Hatch). would give the empire those extra couple centuries of life due to their own capabilities. Once again this is why a system where the people have the option to decide on their own leadership is so important because if something akin to these circumstances were to occur in the United States for example the results would be catastrophic. This is precisely what advocates for strong militaristic or even fascistic systems of government are blatantly ignorant of. Who will succeed as a good leader? Will they even be able to hold a candle to their capabilities? While our systems of democracy/ constitutional republicanism can be incredibly flawed, drawn out, and strapped down by red tape, relying on capable people that only come about through the perfect circumstances is not a recipe for long-term stability. Works Cited: Hatch, Mark. “Constantine.” Romanarmy.net, http://www.romanarmy.net/constantine.shtml. Accessed 10 Dec. 2022. Land, Graham. “The Year of the 6 Emperors.” History Hit, https://www.historyhit.com/the-year-of-the-6- emperors/. Accessed 10 Dec. 2022. Lendering, Jona. “Gallic Empire.” Livius.org, https://www.livius.org/articles/concept/gallic-empire/. Accessed 10 Dec. 2022. Rees, Roger. Diocletian and the Tetrarchy. Edinburgh University Press, 2004. Wasson, Donald L. “Alexander Severus.” World History Encyclopedia, 2013, https://www.worldhistory.org/Alexander_Severus/. Roman-empire.net, https://roman-empire.net/army/aurelians-campaign-in-the-east/. Accessed 10 Dec. 2022.

To lay out my qualifications for this particular parameter I am 6'2.5" though I don't necessarily fit the big category nearly as much. My size of pants is a 28-width 34-length for comparison. It is incredibly difficult for me to narrow down one definitive example as to when being tall has led to a funny situation in my life (as there have been several). One of these experiences was when I first started to elongate even though I was only 5'11" at the time I had earned the nickname "Wise String Bean" because I had attempted to defuse some drama that a couple of my friends had been going through at the time. Your typical violence is not the answer spiel. Despite the situation not panning out in the most ideal way, to say the least, I was surprised that I had taken a liking to the nickname sting bean since it is typically used to demean people with my build, but I ended up embracing it. Later on in life as my growth spurt was still taking effect I experienced side effects different from many people who are growing at an accelerated rate. Whilst I was growing into the 6'0-1" height range, instead of feeling growing pains, I'm going to guess I just wasn't accustomed to the new size yet. I believe this because there were multiple times at which I would get up to fast and feel the blood in my calves and thighs moving up throughout my body, which would make me feel lightheaded and stumble around. I had even fallen over and hit my floor with a loud thud. Naturally, this made my parents concerned, but I just sat up and laughed it off. Just recently I had another incident where my height had been used as a joke by someone I was in contact with. At my place of work, I had to help put up these giant stuffed plushies as part of a display for Halloween. I had to climb on top of a freezer end-cap (the section of an isle between two different isles) and place the ones that were tossed up to me till it was full. One of them ended up falling into this massive gap between one of the freezers and the end cap. In my estimation, this gap was probably about eight feet deep, but I was determined to just get this done. So I made my way down as easily as I could, tossed it out of the gap, and did a tricep pull-up to get out. Once I got down one of the people that was helping told me, "Good thing you're like six-eight." That made me chuckle when I first heard it. After that, I told him my actual height after he had asked, and decided that it was a good time for a break.