Winter had never been a good time at my school. A tight-knit community of students and teachers, when something shook our school's web, everyone felt it. Come January junior year, the web was shaken with such ferocity that it threatened to snap entirely.
Mac was the principal's son. He came when his mother secured the job in my seventh grade year, his ninth. Despite his repute as the principal's son, he had about him a sense of individuality, humility, and kindness that could not be ignored. Nor did he want it to be. Mac quickly wove himself into this web, becoming a central thread. He befriended anyone and everyone with whom he conversed, teacher and student alike. He joined a number of clubs, many of which he would come to lead.
Between my sophomore and junior year, Mac and I embarked on an extracurricular trip abroad. Throughout this trip, we, who had had a few classes together and been in the same clubs, got much closer. We shared meals and secrets; I saw a side of him that I felt oh-so privileged to know: the side of Mac that was not perfect. I saw a portion of him that, I presumed, he kept reserved for his closest friends. I was ecstatic, being real friends with this amiable and handsome freshly-minted college student.
When we got home, the travel group remained close. I saw Mac a few more times, texted him more. He imparted unto me his responsibility to assist an older woman with taking care of her cats before he left for college- ever the giving type, he jumped at opportunities to help those in need. Being in his proximity for much of the summer, I started emulating his behaviors. Confidence, wit, sociability, supportiveness- everything a young student admired. Once the school year started and he went off to college, I put these efforts to work. I relinquished fears of rejection and marched into junior year a changed person.
And truly, I had changed. I initiated meaningful new friendships, took on leadership roles in clubs, spoke more maturely with teachers, and was as eleemosynary as possible. For the first time, I felt a sense of self. Beyond that, I was content with the way things were going. I had long struggled depression, but my new behavior, borrowed from Mac, was changing things for the better. I was hopeful. It was a new feeling.
In January of 2019, I got a phone call during the listless activities I partook in preceding a family dinner, as I did every mundane Sunday. But this call was far from mundane. It was from a school friend, Sky, who I seldom texted, much less called. I picked up to an unusually tremulous voice. He asked me if I was alone- I was. Then he delivered that fateful news.
'Mac killed himself'
A pause.
'Are you shitting me?'
I could think of nothing else to say.
'Um... no'
This wasn't funny. Sky was known for his sardonic and sometimes offensive humor, but this was too far. Repeatedly, I refuted it, there was no way. Mac was the first person to talk you off a ledge, the last person to jump off of it.
His mother naturally took a leave of absence from her position as principal. At the same time, teacher strikes were taking place in the city. For a full week, school was at a standstill, the student body was trying to cope with the death of a dear friend, and our devoted teachers couldn't be there to mourn with us.
My mental health took a turn for the worse as my newfound world was uprooted and the boy who built my new identity left the earth for good. My grades avalanched downward- I saw no purpose in doing anything for my future. Surely if the convivial Mac could not manage past 18, I was just as hopeless.
As I spiraled downward, my partying antics exponentiated. I sought to drown out all of the bad feelings with no regard for how it would impact me or my relationships. That inebriated mean streak persisted until well past the end of my senior year. I was a shell of a person, living up to the definition of my bipolar depression. When the end of my senior year was taken from me, too, by the pitiless pandemic, I felt wholly bereft of further endurance. I hadn't gotten into my dream schools, so I was dedicated now to a school with decent financial aid but worlds away from my aspirations, I had no ability to maintain the one good thing of the preceding two years- my social life- and I was charged with the responsibility of keeping my immunocompromised father safe amid the world's ailments.
Cue the most self-destructive, careless behavior I never care to know again.
There was a small voice in my head, growing more diminutive by the day, that told me I must take care of myself. On the rare occasion that I listened, I would write down my goals and meditate on them. Manifest them. Whenever that proved fruitless, I lost more precious hope. Then one day, on the drive back from a weekend in the mountains, I'd just regained cellphone service when an email from the Pratt Institute popped up on my screen. My number one choice in school, where I was waitlisted- my heart threatened to leave my body.
And I was in.
The despondence of the previous months, years, promised to melt away with the sweet assurance that things could indeed get better. My family was thrilled for me- despite our family's hefty student debt, my parents resolved to send me there.
While I still have trepidation about what my schooling may cost my parents in the long-term, I more often live my life confident that things can, and will, get better. I regained the hope Mac imbued me with, but it is now my own. I now hope persistently, with perserverence.