Growing up in Brockton, MA, as the daughter of a drug-addicted father, I was able to overcome a mountain of adversity. While I understand that a lack of melanin in my skin gives me an incredibly unfair vantage point, I still have faced struggles. At two, my mother was able to get us out of a violent and dangerous situation. I have to live with the knowledge that it was the man who was supposed to be my father who had nearly driven himself, my mother, his son, and myself into a tree. This was a man who had stolen from our already very-low diaper stash to get a fix in - because drugs had been more important than taking care of a child he helped create. When I was eight, he tried to see me via the court system. My mother was able to let me choose what I felt was right, but also made sure to let me know that he could not tell the judge how old I was. For this reason, I felt there was no reason to see someone who couldn't even remember how long ago he had fathered a child. There are stories after stories about how my father would bring me home soaked in urine, or offer my brother marijuana in public when he was merely 8 years old. This was a man I knew was no benefit to my life. Still, the memories haunt me. The stories stay with me. His son, my brother, was in my mother's custody for many years until he adamantly left to live with his mother. During the pandemic, he initiated reconnection. I found out I had nieces and nephews, some of which I will never meet, and the others, I fear I will never see again. I could not understand why he left when I was younger; I blamed myself. When he mentioned his eldest daughter, he made sure to tell me her name was Kayleigh, after me, Haleigh. Words cannot describe having blood family be so connected to you and yet so physically far. I am 27 now and I am still unsure how to cope with loving an addict who is pretty much a distant memory. With all of these factors affecting my upbringing, my mother made sure I knew I was loved, supported, and taken care of no matter what had to be done. We are very much a paycheck-to-paycheck family, but I would not trade it for the world. I do not have a parent who can financially assist me in any way - but that's okay. How do I repay the favor of getting us out of a dangerous situation; for putting me first even at the cost of herself? If there was one thing she drilled into me, it is the fact that we can wallow in the pain and hurt of what has happened to us, or we can use these lessons to help us grow. I like to think of it as a boat and water analogy I had seen online - a ship floats on water, but will sink if water enters and floods the boat; negativity and hardships are the water while you are the ship - You can survive and reach your destiny with all this negativity and adversity around you, but as soon as you let it consume you, there may be irreparable damage that can take a village to fix. I am nearing the end of my Bachelor's in Criminal Justice: Victimology and hope to use the information to help others in need.