In the future I am a courageous, standout leader and advocate for women in my career field!

For as long as I can remember, books have been a place of comfort for me. A solace in times of anxiety, doubt, and sadness. There is no escape like a good novel. As I assume many book readers are, I am an introvert and I found what I was missing through literature, connection. Being an avid reader my entire life I have found what type of novels I am drawn to and most of them happen to be character-driven novels. In these types of novels, I find myself thinking deeply about the human experience and what it means to go through the world, essentially, in your own head. Every person on the planet is living a unique life, with intimate struggles and thoughts that affect their actions. In particularly well-written novels I begin to feel like I develop a friendship with the characters as they come to life, keen to all their thoughts, relationships, and actions. With a spectator's eye, I see the motivations behind their actions and how this leads to an outcome, whether that be conflict, resolution, or misunderstanding. I have learned through reading, to relate and reflect, but mostly to empathize. Although these characters are fictitious, they are written by an author who in developing these characters, is bearing their vulnerability, and offering an intimate look into themself. There is a quote by Ernest Hemingway in his book Death in the Afternoon that stays with me: “When writing a novel a writer should create living people; people not characters. A character is a caricature.” I believe this creation of “real” people aids in empathy. I see myself in the characters, I see my sister, my mother, my father, my aunt. I see a set of circumstances that have happened in my life, I see characters react the way I would and I see them react the exact opposite. It is a gift to see yourself mirrored on a page and have the ability to learn from a situation that has never happened. Human beings and all their complexities are chaotic, unpredictable, and sometimes vulgar, yet from reading I have a deeper understanding and ability to take a step back and place myself in their shoes. Through worlds formed by words, sentences, and paragraphs, I have learned to become more present and connected in the real world. Reading has affected my life in more ways than I can count, but truly it has made me realize how much I want to inspire and impact people. There is a period right after I finish a book where, with the risk of sounding like a cliche, everything seems possible. There are a handful of books that I can say have unquestionably changed my life and the way I think, they have moved me in the purest sense. I find myself thinking about these books at random or pulling from them to relate to a conversation I am having. That is my goal for my life. I want to impact people, I want to influence the way they think, what they believe. I want to encapsulate a world and give it to people.

Today, the climate crisis and state of the earth should be alarming to anyone who is paying attention. A paralyzing anxiety creates a helpless attitude by many who believe that they do not hold the capacity to make a surmountable change but this is not a productive way of thinking. Although, yes, it is true that it will take large corporations around the globe to adjust their practices, there are vast sustainable changes we as individuals can implement into our daily lives that reduce our carbon footprint. In recent years I became dedicated to living a cleaner lifestyle and began researching routine changes that would reduce my carbon footprint. The first realization I made was the amount of plastic my family and I were expending. I found the amount of single-use plastic my one household was producing alarming. I decided to start small, we replaced our sandwich bags with glass containers, we began to use reusable grocery totes, and we stopped buying bottled waters. Progressively, I continued making small alterations to my daily routines. I take the time to ensure all lights and electronics are off when we leave our house, I reduce my time in the shower, and try to keep the house at reasonable temperatures without the over use of A/C. I began telling my friends about this as well and suggesting they take the time to understand how they can reduce their energy consumption. Furthermore, my consumption of goods became the focus. Overconsumption is something we all easily fall victim to, especially with the influence of social media, however, I aim to buy used products and second hand clothing. There is an unbelievable amount of clothes and items in thrift stores and resale shops that can be reused and repurposed. With that being said, when there are items I cannot buy used, I ensure that they are quality items that will last the test of time rather than ending up in a landfill in a few years. My biggest life change was attempting to drastically decrease the amount of meat I was consuming. In my research, I was appalled to see the effects the meat industry has on the environment. I tend to eat plant-based as often as possible, as well as locally based produce. There is no denying the climate crisis is overwhelming and one can easily spiral into a negative outlook on the ordeal. However, in taking a step back I realized I can do my part and in that I am making a difference. I think it’s crucial we do our part in aiding the revival of the environment rather than contributing to the larger problem.

If I could have everyone read one book it would be the novel Another Country by James Baldwin. It is suffocating, erratic, and anxiety-inducing, yet after reading comes a profound sense of clarity and reflection. The driving force behind this book is an exploration of human nature and the atrocities we do to the people we love and in turn, to ourselves. Controversial for the time it was published, this novel addresses what it means to be black and the grueling consequences of a society that does not accept you and the guilt, anger and violence that is created and aimed inward as a result. Baldwin’s use of his white characters is particularly effective in calling out the performative progressiveness and a white savior complex that is used not to do good, but to display your goodness and receive praise for it. In addition to race, sexuality further isolates and creates separate, unique guilt. Baldwin displays queerness in its true form, a spectrum of discovery. What does it mean to be gay? What does it mean to be straight? The set-in-stone labels are challenged and turn fluid. As a reader, you begin to associate traits of these characters with yourself, however, in identifying with them, you do not know who plays the role of protagonist or antagonist. It begs the question: why do we act as we do and how does it define us and our relationships? How much does society play an impact? Are our biases always blatant or subconscious? These are the questions you leave this book with. I believe this book is a must-read and although this book was published over 60 years ago, it remains just as relevant. It encapsulates a deeply ingrained culture and allows the audience to take a step back and reflect, not just on themselves but on society and their role in the everyday biases that still affect marginalized groups to this day. The persistent violence and conflict within makes this a difficult but wholly necessary read.

When I was a young girl in school, I went to the nurse's office at least once a week because I always felt overwhelmed in my class, especially if we were doing presentations. There was never an adequate description of how I felt, I lacked the words. Growing up, this feeling followed me into my teenage years which I eventually learned was anxiety. In your teenage years, you start to become aware of who you are and around this time I learned I was gay. I lived in a small town in Texas, where mental health struggles and expressions of queerness are not welcomed in the slightest. I felt more alone than ever, which eventually led to depression. Anxiety and depression single-handedly defined my younger years. As I grew up and left my hometown, I was suddenly exposed to communities that identified with my struggles and I found solace in this. This exposure gave me the courage to speak up and talk about my mental health for the first time and my life was transformed. In reaching out I learned self-soothing techniques, methods of identifying triggers that I could bring up in therapy, and most of all, I felt that I wasn't alone. My mental health is important because when I neglected it, I was lost. I felt I had no purpose and I would never be defined by anything but my struggles. With my experience now I realize my mental health is the most important aspect of myself. Strengthening and caring about my mental wellness allows me to prosper and flourish without being held back. When I began addressing my mental health and allowing myself to express my needs without feeling shame, my quality of life was completely transformed. It gave me a new outlook on life, my situation, and the ability to feel like a renewed person. With the rapid rise of social media apps and unfettered access to news stories, our brains are constantly bombarded with every current event in the world. The constant influx of new information, especially in times of crisis such as the pandemic, caused me to participate in "doom scrolling" which is continuously reading about something that is causing me a great deal of stress and anxiety. Eventually, I began to realize that the habit of constantly being exposed to social media and checking my phone for updates was causing me so much stress and anxiety it was manifesting itself in physical ailments such as headaches. I knew I needed to do what was best for my mental health so I began to cut down my screen time. Slowly, I began to replace screen time with new hobbies. I picked up knitting and crocheting. I became an avid reader, which is how I pass most of my free time now. The change in my mental wellness was drastic, and I felt myself begin to truly enjoy my life and feel comfortable with who I am. I began journaling and expressing my feelings through words. I try to meditate at least twice a week to alleviate any built-up stress. Implementing these small changes to my routine allows me to become the best version of myself and assure that I value and nurture my mental health.