On January 24th, 2021, my grandmother, Amajji, passed away in India. At 76, she was not just a grandmother but a second maternal figure in my life. Her guiding principle, “To live for others, you must live for yourself first,” shaped her actions, from riding rollercoasters in her later years to offering me unwavering support through my struggles. Losing her felt like losing a part of myself.
Her death created a mental and emotional burden I wasn’t prepared for. My family and I couldn’t attend her funeral in India, which deepened our grief. It was the first time I saw my mother break down, openly grieving in a way that shocked me. My father, who tried to be the pillar for the rest of us, couldn’t hold back his own sorrow. Despite his efforts to stay composed, I saw cracks in his strength. I, too, tried to be resilient, but the emotional weight was overwhelming. Grief, paired with the helplessness of being so far away, plunged me into an internal struggle.
In the months after Amajji’s passing, my mental health deteriorated. I watched my mother retreat into a state of quiet despair, while my sister and father clung to small reminders of her presence—like her favorite snacks or magazines. We were each trying to cope, but none of us could truly express the depth of our pain. I found myself sinking into bed, reliving memories of her and feeling increasingly lost. The emotional numbness was the most difficult challenge I had faced, and for a while, I wasn’t sure how to move forward.
Eventually, I realized I needed to take care of my mental health to support my family, just as Amajji had always said. I began weightlifting as a way to channel my grief, finding strength not just in my body but in my mind. Each personal record I broke felt like a small victory over the sadness I carried. I also pushed myself to engage with others, joining Interaxon as a writer and mentoring students in neuroscience, which gave me purpose.
Helping others, especially through mentorship, brought me back to life. It allowed me to rebuild connections with my family, encouraging deeper conversations about our feelings. Through these discussions, I found healing—not just for myself, but for my mother and sister, who had quietly endured their own mental health struggles. Even small actions, like helping my mother cook or supporting my sister with homework, opened the door for us to share more openly.
In the summer of 2021, I volunteered at Riverside Community Hospital, further applying Amajji’s philosophy. Working with patients battling serious illnesses, I listened to their stories and saw how deeply mental and emotional struggles are intertwined with physical health. This experience deepened my understanding of mental health challenges and the power of simply being present for others. I felt like I was carrying forward Amajji’s legacy by offering patients the empathy she had always shown me.
Amajji’s death forced me to confront mental health issues head-on, but it also taught me how to heal. Moving forward, I’m committed to supporting others who face similar struggles. I plan to raise awareness about mental health by engaging in open conversations, both in my personal life and professionally, as I pursue a career in medicine. Mental health, I’ve learned, is not something to overcome alone. I want to be there for others as a listener, mentor, and caregiver, just as Amajji was for me. Her legacy lives on in my commitment to mental health advocacy, and I hope to help others find the resilience I discovered within myself.