When I explain to my therapist that my moms mental illness doesn’t control my life, I’m forcing myself to believe that, not because it’s true. The reality is that in fifth grade, my moms schizoaffective disorder started to fester. As it worsened, it affected my grades all throughout middle school, some nights she would kick me out of the house, blinded by delusions. And the times I wasn't being kicked out, I was being abused, and not only did this affect me physically it left scars mentally as well. This burden that I carried seeped into my life outside of home, I became distant from friends who I was close with, volleyball which was a sport I was very passionate about, I lost my motivation to even go to practice. A mental illness that wasn’t my own was consuming every aspect of my life. In seventh grade my parents got divorced, my dad moved out, and my mom got full custody. The stress and new court orders became overwhelming for my mom also meaning that it increased the growth rate of her illness. What was already overbearing only became increasingly overwhelming, as time went on to my eighth grade year too many cases caused by my mom that were considered child endangerment caused her to lose full custody. Her illness had dismantled my entire world but my dad rebuilt it from scratch starting with absolutely nothing. He had a rental home forty minutes away from where we originally lived that fit two people, and a job he couldn’t risk taking breaks from. With the new court orders he had to find another job and fit me and my two siblings in a house only meant for him. He knew that the one job he had at the time wasn’t enough to sustain all of us so he found another job and rejoined the military. When he joined he signed up for Sapper training at a time when most people his age would be trying to live comfortably in order to become elite in combat engineering, also gain advanced knowledge in explosives, and also pushing far past his physical and mental limits with a 50% to 60% fail rate. Even with all odds against him during this course he was able to graduate, along with that his battalion commander assessing him giving my dad the #1 spot in his battalion. Unfortunately, with this upgrade in our lives it came at a price, with all the physical labor he had to do in both military work and jobs he had to get cervical disk replacement causing him to have limited movement in his whole body and also limiting the amount of work he can do. After he got his surgery he told me that he always wants to be the best 100% of the time and always be the top 10% of the best, and that’s all he’s shown me since my mom has been sick. We went from having four people living in a rental home meant for one, to a rental meant for three, and now as I'm a senior in high school living in a real house meant for four and he still continues to push himself in work and military training all because he pushes himself above and beyond in everything he does. My moms illness may have controlled the first chapter of my life but my dad allowed me to gain it back and with that I plan to continue his ambition for every chapter that follows.

Laws are meant to maintain order, promote justice, and regulate specific behavior. But for me, the court hearings that determined my life made me feel like I was drowning; the rules that were supposed to protect me became waves pushing me back under, forcing me to fight to breathe again. As the oldest of three, rules have been my way of life; I was the example and also protected them from what we couldn’t control. Our mom had schizoaffective disorder, meaning she had delusions, depression, and bipolar disorder. My relationship with her mental illness involved sleepless nights caring for her and my siblings when she couldn't find the motivation to get out of bed for days on end, physical and mental abuse, and helping differentiate between reality and her hallucinations. Eventually, it became too much for my family, and my dad divorced her in 2020. During the court hearing, my mom was granted full custody, while my siblings and I were allowed to visit my dad. Over time, I could see that her illness was worsening, especially under the stress of the divorce. The battle between reality and her mind intensified, and with it, my responsibilities grew heavier. Things deteriorated to the point where she became a public disturbance, leading to police involvement and yet another custody hearing. Even then, custody was given to her, and she grew to resent me after I fought against her in court. As a result of this, I suffered academically and also mentally. I was forced to miss multiple days of school because I was either kicked out of my house or she wouldn’t take me to school as a protest of her unresolved anger towards me. The cycle of abuse and her manic episodes continued until it once again became a public matter, bringing me back to the courtroom. My experiences have led me to realize how flawed our legal system is and how, sometimes, the rules meant to protect the vulnerable end up failing them entirely. Though my mom’s illness and the failure of the legal system hurt me deeply, they also sparked growth on my path towards law. It became a start for my personal development, helping me discover a career that truly connects with my story and what I love to do. Her illness taught me skills like how to listen to people in difficult situations, stay calm in chaos, find logic in the midst of confusion, and to make decisions that balance emotions with reason. These are the same skills that a lawyer represents with their clients, whose lives depend on being heard. Not only that, but going through the process of the court system multiple times for my parents' divorce, my mom's illness, and also talking to lawyers taught me the importance of detail. I began to take notice of how every word I spoke to lawyers mattered, how a lack of understanding could cost my safety, and how easily my evidence could be twisted. This sparked a growing curiosity in me to better understand the legal system and make it fair under my authority. Studying law would allow me to understand the system that shaped my childhood, changing force where some families may feel seen or unheard. In college, I plan to study pre-law, political science, and join organizations that focus on youth advocacy. All of my experiences have encouraged me to pursue law with my goal to ensure that others are heard, protected, and not harmed by the system. I want to change the law so no one else will drown the way I did.