cassandra's canary (for the girls who can see the storm coming) i would sometimes like to think i am going mad for i sing for everyone seeks for answers and yet my song goes unheard and i am shrunken little bird smaller until nothing at all yet i sing and i am either dead or dying in myself from the fumes, sickly sweet, of Delphi or the soft silence of tunnels that house things i don’t need and will never see save for the glimmers in their hands offerings for something larger that they sing of in a small box or a temple i am equally dead used for the lungs that they destroy with wanton apathy but i sing with another choking breath for the crimes of war the hands around my neck and the thickening air the men’s voices screaming harsh on my ears all noise and no words that i am useless for my song that may yet save them from love of gold bodily greed the breath branching in my chest widens head sways feet stumble as i struggle shaking to move. to sing for them.

Even while working, I like to have music playing in the background to help keep myself in a relaxed state. I often also keep candles burning, and make sure to wear comfortable clothes unless I'm going somewhere that requires otherwise. I take care to stay hydrated, and get enough sleep whenever I can (although I very occasionally have a bout of insomnia). I also take hot showers on a daily basis, and take care to use lotion afterwards so my skin doesn't dry out.

I have always particularly enjoyed both performing and listening to music. I am okay at piano, and know how to play from sheet music (as well as a little by ear). I also sing, and take voice lessons every other week. I used to sing in the choir at my church, and was in choir at my high school all four years I was there. I also enjoy writing original song lyrics, often in the context of my other writings.

I immensely enjoy being around my family - they're my best friends, and they understand me like no one else. I also love music - some of my favorite songs have definitely gotten me through some tough times, and other songs are of great inspiration to me when I write.

I have often been complimented on my smarts and quick wit. I made excellent grades all through high school and performed well on the SAT. I've always been rather voracious for knowledge, and often read fact books cover to cover. I can recite facts on demand - although with jokes it's a little more difficult. I usually have to make them in the flow of the conversation.

I personally value my empathy and creativity. Both are invaluable to me as a writer - creativity for obvious reasons (coming up with original stories, characters, and worlds), and empathy enhances that, helping me to better convey both my own and others' experiences through stories. Empathy and creativity are also helpful in socializing as well - empathy for better understanding others' viewpoints and creativity for being more engaging and better helping others should the need arise for it.

Easier access to mental health resources and treating mental health the same you would physical health. Therapy and counseling should be included in workplace insurance coverage, especially if the job is a particularly stressful one which requires more mental health help. There should also be less of a stigma surrounding mental health and seeking help for it. You wouldn't accuse someone with a broken leg of attention-seeking, so why would you say the same for someone with depression, anxiety, or schizophrenia? We also need more accurate representation in media for those struggling with mental illness. People with mental health issues aren't "dangerous" or people to be reduced to stereotypes or tropes. They need to be presented accurately, and with the dignity they deserve.

I am a writer who plans to not only tell exciting and engaging stories, but to also celebrate other women in horror (specifically gothic) literature (Mary Shelley and Flannery O'Connor come to mind). I'd also like to create work that specifically works against the often used stigma around mental illnesses in horror in general, often discarding other backgrounds and possible motives and just shrugging a villain, hero, or other important character off as having psychosis-type symptoms or being part of a system (DID or otherwise). I've always been interested in the strange and spooky - in middle school, I eagerly devoured volumes of Poe along with typical books on mythology, or whatever reading we did for class. The terror, these oddly intimate struggles, captivated me. It felt oddly so much easier to put myself in the shoes of someone exploring a haunted house than in the shoes of a superhero or plucky protagonist in other stories. Horror is an oddly personal genre - often we pour our own worries, problems from our past and fears for the future into these stories where others can find them, in a way that's more personal than action or fantasy. It isn't escapism, it's a heart to heart conversation with the author. And I want to speak to those who need it the most.

I would like to think of myself as a storyteller - deftly weaving words into tableaus of light and sound and often a ghost or two. But that would be too simplistic, wouldn't it? Everyone is many things - I myself am simultaneously proud of my work and feel awkward showing it to others. I'm both excitable and retiring - willing to ramble on for hours about topics that interest me, but after less than an hour with large crowds and I'm ready to leave. I can misplace my phone while holding it and solve puzzles in minutes. I'm Genevieve.

The most helpful financial advice I've received was from my Personal Finance teacher in sophomore year of high school. "If you can't buy something twice, and feel comfortable with what you still have, you can't afford it." I'm already frugal by nature, but that really helped to let me know when it was okay for me to buy a little something for myself, and to let me know when it's better to wait until next time.

A book that personally inspires me is Ready Player One by Ernest Cline. Its technology-heavy premise speaks to me, as someone who has grown up essentially in the age of the Internet. When I read Cline's novel in the year 2020, I especially related to the protagonist Wade as someone who was also learning remotely and knew a lot about oddly niche subjects, especially movies, video games, and trivia in general. Also the fact that Wade with some help from his friends manages to take on massive corporation IOI (Innovative Online Industries) and succeed is particularly helpful for when I feel overwhelmed by my problems, knowing that even the largest of obstacles can still be overcome in the end. It's also a comforting reassurance that in the end, it doesn't always matter how successful you are according to typical societal standards. It's about your relationships with others, and how you treat them.

When I was younger, I struggled with my mental health a lot. I have severe attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, which caused struggles for me both in the classroom and out of it. I often spaced out during class, or would focus on drawing in my notebooks instead of taking notes, like I was supposed to. Sometimes assignments went undone, or were done incorrectly due to me misunderstanding the instructions. It affected my social life as well. I often had trouble making eye contact with others, especially if I didn't know them all that well; I was awkward in conversations, and often rambled on about subjects most people wouldn't care about in the first place. It was especially difficult in middle school. I had recently come back out of homeschooling, and I was still struggling to adjust. I was more openly bullied for my reserved, sometimes odd nature, and even some of my teachers weren't very nice to me either. But I fought my way through, trying my best and staying committed to my studies. Through hard work (and a change in medicine dosage), I persevered, and things got exponentially better as I entered high school with high grades and a friend group I was close with.

In my mind, the meaning of life is to honor and glorify God through showing love and acceptance to others. It is my goal to show kindness, love, and integrity to everyone I know, regardless of who they are. I not only show love to people in my day-to-day life, but also volunteer at my Sunday school and at other church-related projects to help out wherever I can.

I want to become a published author for a living. I currently specialize in short stories, and would love more than anything to turn my short stories, as well as my poems, into collections for better distribution. My main goal for this, above all else, is to tell lively and engaging stories, with characters that readers can find entertaining, relatable, or both.

I always take care to stay hydrated, and make sure that I have eaten. Self care starts with taking care of your body. I also make a point to take hot showers every day - the temperature relaxes me mentally, and relaxes my muscles to let out any tensions that may have built up throughout the day. I also keep plenty of lotions to help keep my skin from drying out during the winter months. I enjoy keeping scented candles around as well - they are helpful for calming me, as well as setting a relaxing atmosphere for whichever room I am in. Burning incense also helps with this. I enjoy having music playing as well, anything from jazz to classic rock to folk music. I also love having a surplus of blankets and pillows around, even in communal areas, in case I've had a rough day. I even keep a weighted blanket on my bed as well.

Some of my most enjoyed hobbies include drawing (particularly coloring - I have more than a few coloring books), practicing karate, playing the piano, and playing video games. I specifically enjoy playing games on the Nintendo Switch, including Super Monkey Ball, Mario Kart, and Animal Crossing, although my sister plays the latter game far more often than I do. I often enjoy reading as well, specifically books in the horror or mystery genre. I have a particular fondness for Victorian Gothic literature, including the works of Edgar Allan Poe, Mary Shelley, Bram Stoker, and Sheridan Le Fanu. I also love horror and surrealist short stories, and enjoy the Southern Gothic works of Flannery O'Connor. I strive to follow these authors' examples in my own writings. I also enjoy listening to music, primarily songs that fall under the indie and folk genres, and narrative songs in general - the band Lord Huron is a particular favorite of mine.

The key to confidence is self-love. With low self-esteem, you cannot properly appreciate yourself and your actions and thus confidence is all but impossible. So I plan to improve my confidence by focusing specifically on self-love and improving my self-esteem. This starts with self-care. The main issue with this would be adequately pacing my work, since I am particularly sensitive to burnout, and also ensuring I get an adequately productive amount of work done per day, along with ensuring I follow basic self-care routines every day (keeping hydrated, clean, and eating at least three times daily). Positive self-talk is another major component of this. Whenever looking over my work (be it writing, art, or otherwise), I make a point to apply positive comments to it whenever possible. This not only boosts my self-esteem, but also assists in combatting my previous habit of engaging in negative self-talk regarding the quality of my work.

I've currently accomplished learning to play the piano (I've become proficient in both playing from sheet music and by ear), and am currently learning to speak French. I'm also well on my way to achieving a black belt in karate - as of right now I have a purple belt, which is an advanced rank. I do also have on my bucket list the goal of visiting every US state, of which I've visited New York, Ohio, Illinois, Tennessee, Mississippi, Arkansas, Florida, Colorado, and Kansas, so I still have quite a while to go. Also on my list is learning guitar (I have one but do not yet know how to play), visiting Italy (waiting until the current crisis has passed), learning how to cook, going on a return visit to Cedar Point (an amusement park), and joining the local community theater and performing there, since acting has always been something fun to me.

I am proficient in vocal music, and occasionally play piano. I often practice these skills independently, focusing on a set playlist of songs and sheet music that I have. I also take vocal lessons every other week, which helps determine the playlist specifically. I do also enjoy singing karaoke from time to time. However, my main talent is writing. I keep a portfolio of short stories, poems, and song lyrics, usually pertaining to the genres of horror or mystery, and add to it on a regular basis. Most of my drawings (done as a hobby) also feature original characters from these works, either protagonists or monsters/ghosts, which I am particularly fond of designing.

I am currently planning to obtain a Bachelor's degree in Creative Writing and become a published author of short stories, poems, and song lyrics as well. I plan to work on my own terms whenever possible, to have better creative control of my works. My main goal with my work is to tell stories that people will enjoy, and I plan on getting published as soon as possible so my work can gain more exposure and more people can enjoy it.

My sister and I volunteer at the Sunday school at our church every other week. We watch over a classroom of kids while the main service is going on, giving them crafts to do and teaching them about lessons from the Bible, as well as keeping them safe and out of trouble in general. This can be chaotic, considering that we've had as many as thirty two kids in a class, especially around the holidays. It's completely worth it, though. The kids are nice, and it really feels like I'm making a difference. I go out of my way to make the shyer kids feel comfortable in class - often they'll sit by themselves reading of coloring, and not really talking to anyone. As a former shy kid myself, I understand the apprehension of wanting to talk to others but worrying you'll be rejected, so I try to introduce myself to help relieve those worries. Seeing the smiles on their faces lets me know that that small gesture of kindness meant something special to them.

I write, although that may be too simple a word for it. What I strive to create isn't just words sitting on a page, marching simply one after the other like ants dutifully carrying crumbs to the hive, in perfect lock-step. I try for something more than that. I build characters and places through my stories and poems, construct places that hopefully my readers feel free to walk around in. I pull bits and pieces from my life and the lives of people around me, building engaging characters that could hold up their end of a conversation. However, the arts aren't just my career. I doodle on my belongings, small flowers and eyes and faces filling margins of books I've read. My room is strewn with coloring books and pages of drawings, and a guitar and karaoke microphone rest at separate ends of the room. Music speakers and records players sit all around the house, in bedrooms and the living room, as well as a piano. Art and music and poetry are a way of life for my family, and I am proof of that.

1. A few years ago, my family went to see The Nutcracker as performed by a local dance school in the downtown area of my city. My family has always been big on the arts, taking us to art festivals, plays, and musicals performed in the area whenever possible. The show captivated me - it was so much more than just dances, it was quite literally poetry in motion. Part of the reason it meant so much to me at the time is because that was when I had just settled on writing as a career - I was looking specifically at lyric writing and poetry at the time, although I've diversified a little since then. It didn't just blow my mind, it opened my eyes to what I wanted from my writing - graceful, descriptive words that flowed like water, and wove together into a story worth reading. 2. One of the most important teachers in my life was Miss P, my English teacher in sophomore year of high school. She went out of her way to make sure we understood what we were learning, and was always engaging and interactive with her lessons. She was always very understanding of me, and when I doodled in class, she even asked me to make a drawing for her, which she hung up on the whiteboard. Miss P was both a teacher and a friend, and above all else, she taught me to appreciate my own work. 3. The arts are so much more than entertainment. They are crucial for telling the truths the world needs to hear, and providing encouragement or harsh realities in times we need them most. I would choose to host a poetry slam/songwriting contest, spotlighting blues music and poetry about the history and culture of the American South, to give more exposure to poets and songwriters of color, who are often underrepresented in the South itself. 4. In high school, I was in choir for all four years, and one thing I always wanted was to get into the a cappella girls' group. I auditioned for three years, and always tried my best. Unfortunately, I never got in. This caused me to try all the harder at other auditions, and I was accepted into the chamber singers choir at my school senior year, and we sung at graduation. What had been a failure gave me the motivation I needed to achieve success.

A legacy is not found in the material. Things are nice, but they do not determine your lasting influence over the world around you. No - legacy lies in the individual's ideas, how they inspire and are remembered by others - be it mere opinion or actions taken, although the latter leaves a far more monumental impression. Legacy, like manners or morals in general, is best found in the written word, be it fictional or otherwise. My intended legacy is meant to show others hope, as well as showcase the depths and peaks of emotion, and the human experience in general.

My creation of choice is poetry - which may seem like a strange initial choice. Most see poetry (and a lot of writing in general) as a relic, a holdover from childhood and years past. Yet in today's day and age, writing has become more necessary than ever. People need stories - an escape from their current troubles, a lesson they need to learn, a new perspective they can see the world through. My aim with poetry is, above all, to show that kindness is key. My characters are diverse - rich, poor, extravagant, reserved, all kinds of amalgamations of different attributes. Luck is wild, varied, and tragedy is a relatively common outcome for my hapless protagonists. Yet I always attempt to balance it in some way - the last thing that a story or poem needs is a downer ending with no reason to enjoy it. Be it through a glimmer of hope or some strange catharsis, I keep pure pessimism from prevailing. My writings aren't the mere vessels of plot, either - I paint with imagery, making the scene vividly clear for the reader (even though I utilize muted grays and neutral tones should the setting call for it). Heroes are colored in sickly-sweet pastels, or glaring neons as vibrant as their personality, and settings drawn in hazy, impressionistic beauty. Antagonists are outlined in dark, moody colors, or gaudy, harshly bright colors that almost seem to have as much chemistry as their personalities. My fondest wish is to inspire others - that some soul will find themselves in my scribblings, and take heart that all is never lost.

When I was younger, I struggled with self-love - I was pretty shy, and often saw my difficulties making friends as a sign that I was somehow not worthy of companionship. I was bullied fairly often at school, which didn't exactly help matters. Despite the amazing support my family gave me, I only really started coming out of my shell around middle school - I made some friends, developed more interests, and even had my first boyfriend. I learned to express myself more freely, experimenting with drawing, writing, and music. I was finding myself, along with finding friends who shared my interests. I continued to develop in my self-love and self-expression through my freshman, sophomore, and junior year, even to now. I made more friends - I'm part of a group chat now, which seems like a small accomplishment, but would wow my middle school self, who struggled to even say hello to her classmates. The best part of all this? I never changed to meet others' expectations - I only ever changed to feel more comfortable with myself. By letting my true self shine, I not only learned to love myself, but deepened my love for others as well. It's been an incredible, but difficult journey, and it's taken a fair bit of time to get to where I am now. As with all journeys, it started with the smallest of steps - and the help and love of others. Thankfully, as I've progressed, it's gotten so much easier - and now, I can aim for bigger and better things than I ever imagined.

COVID-19 has brought out the incredible kindness, strength, and above all, the inimitable power of the human race in a crisis. Of course, humanity has shown its shortcomings - ignorance, cowardice, and cruelty have never felt more raw, bleeding red and blue and all hues of hate onto the streets, onto the skin of those less fortunate than I. Violence and sickness and isolation have ripped hearts and charred minds, weak and strong alike smote by cruel calamity. Yet, there has been such soft, kind light in the darkness. Sweet souls give food and clothes and masks to the needy. We sing songs, tell stories, give reminders of safety and ears to listen to other's pleas. I, myself, have never been the type to reach out - yet I find my actions kinder, my words gentler, my mind more open. With bad comes good, with misfortune, love to spread to others, lighting mellow flames of light and warmth. They hop from heart to wooden heart, blazing into a unity I have not seen before. The light is blinding, in the most beautiful of ways. Creativity and sweetness burning bright in a night that seemed so cold and hopeless before. As Alexander Pope once said, "Hope springs eternal in the human breast." In the darkest of voids, in a desert so dry and cold and desperate that it can drive one mad, I almost envision a literal spring - glowing water, giving life and love and warm, warm hope. I only hope that the spring lasts until the sun rises once more.

As someone who has struggled with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) all my life, I have always felt like a misfit, from fidgeting to the way I analyze problems. My brain is acutely focused on specific topics, giving me the interest and knowledge needed to achieve excellence in those areas. Words, in particular, have always appealed to me - the idea of painting complex, vivid pictures with simple strings of letters seems like a strange, eccentric magic which is difficult to wield, much less master. Writing has given me an outlet to express, a space where each and every syllable is laid out with all the strategy of a chess master at the board. Stories can be woven, colors of joy and growth and grief expertly sewn by trembling hands that refuse to stay still. Even though my perspective can be viewed as unique, the themes are not. I try to call to attention issues as old as humanity - the constant war against cruelty and corruption which all decent people feel called to undertake. I am one hushed voice, seeking the strength to whisper truth through my fiction, hoping against hope that someday, my song will be counted amongst the others. Not to blend in, of course. That, I know, cannot be. However, a misfit does not denote a lack of community, only a lack of conformity. Conformity to silence, to hiding inner feelings where they do nothing but wait to burst, blowing shrapnel where it can only hurt. As a misfit, I refuse to let my growth be stifled. I could never fit in. I was not meant to. Only by moving an idea from cramped boxes, can it truly flourish.