The quality that I value the most in myself is my character. I try my hardest to be the most studious I can be and to treat everyone as equals. I strive to be the nicest person I can be so that no one has to feel the same pain I have. This quality developed due to the lack of kindness I received or felt from my peers. It hurt me deep inside to see everyone else treated with kindness when others couldn't even talk to me. I decided that the pain that I feel is something that no one should have to go through. I planned on ignoring the things said to me that were hurtful and only project kindness from my being. This led to more people being nice to me and ultimately helped me get to where I am today. All in all, this sort of quality or characteristic is something that many should consider developing in their lives. It has helped me to move forward and push myself beyond my limits. I discovered many things about myself and the way I influence those around me. By being kind to everyone, it has helped me to be someone that my peers can rely on. This quality that manifested itself at an early age has helped me to grow as a person. I hope to keep this characteristic a part of me for as long as I am able.

When I was 14 years old, I was diagnosed with both anxiety and bipolar disorder. These two make for an incredibly volatile combination. Each can either increase or decrease the effects of the other. Since then, I have struggled with making friends, meeting new people, and making any attempt to find someone to share the rest of my life with. It has made school very difficult for me. I have struggled to even give speeches in front of the kids that I grew up with. These two mental illnesses have shaped the way that I will further my education. It made me decide to go into the field of computer science. In the dark times, computers and video games helped to bring me out. The few relationships that I managed to have throughout high school were definitely difficult, especially with me struggling with anxiety and bipolar. Although it hurt quite a bit, it showed me that I wasn't with the right person. The right person is there to help you and work with you, and I'm still searching for that one person. From a young age, I have known that the world isn't the best place. It can be very harsh and try to put you down. Although, there are those people and places that make it better. My mental illness hasn't changed my view all that much from what it once was. The only thing that has changed is my view of who is a good person and who is just putting on a mask.

Imagine your sitting at your desk listening to your teacher. Everything is going perfectly fine until suddenly, you start to take deep breaths and start to panic. For what? Not even you can seem to figure that out. You stop and take a few deep breaths and begin to calm down. Now, you can pay attention. This is what it's like to live with anxiety, at least when you have it as bad as I do. There are times when I begin to panic and have an anxiety attack for no reason at all. It has made school difficult in the areas of paying attention and associating myself with my peers. With anxiety, you tend to disassociate with those around you and become quite introverted. I've managed to overcome that obstacle and learn to live with it. I started to take medications last summer in order to help with that. It has been very hard to put myself out there and meet new people. Even giving a speech in front of those I grew up with is difficult. Family-wise, however, is much more different. It's almost like I am a completely different person. Anxiety hasn't affected my family life and I hope that it never will. Alongside my anxiety, I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. Most know what this is and how it can affect people, but some don't. Bipolar disorder is when someone's mood can change in the blink of an eye. One moment they are happy as can be and the next, they're sad about nothing and everything. This, coupled with my anxiety, has made it extremely difficult to make friends throughout school. Those friends I have found are some of the greatest friends one could ask for. These two mental illnesses make for a very dangerous combination. I have learned to work through them and push myself farther than I ever thought I would have thought. I have overcome these obstacles and am working and improving my well-being. I have learned to not take everything said to me to heart and to ignore those who try to put you down. With these instructions imprinted in my brain, I hope to lessen the impact these two mental illnesses have on my life.