As ludicrous as this may sound, as a child I always knew that deep down in my heart I was meant to leave behind something significant for the world once I am gone. But I have yet to fully figure it out, however, there are moments when I do know. Those moments occur when I can connect with others on a deeper level. When I can make someone smile after a rough day or be the one to speak up when no one else dares to. In some way, I hope to be an advocate and inspiration to those who have been through hell and feel like they will not make it to see another day. It is said that pain brings wisdom, unfortunately even as a child, I have experienced a get deal of pain. From emotional to sexual abuse, to homelessness, mental illness, and more. I know what it feels like to have both external and internal turmoil, but I have also learned how to rise above it. If I can prevent someone from enduring all that I have gone through or help someone get to the other side, then all the trauma I encountered would be worth it. I hope to leave behind a legacy that is the blueprint for someone else’s survival and success.

I have the luxury of having the same five friends since middle school. As I have gotten older I discovered just how rare this is, at this point I do not even consider them my friends but my sisters by spirit. And the time that I share with them is what genuinely makes my heart full. We are a mesh of different personalities and when we come together it is always a party. Also, we lend each other a shoulder to cry on. We all have very similiar backgrounds of being the children of Haitian immirgrants, who came to this country with nothing. Along with not having as much resources to finance our education,however we still dared to dream and we each have become successful in our own right. There are simply no words to describe the joy I feel when I see one of my sisters succeed. Whether it is walking down the aisle and starting a family, or walking in a commencement ceremony, or having the courage to start their business or traveling the world. But most times it simply being in their presence that is enough for me.We have conquered many battles together, and with every win it brings a new reason to celebrate with my sisters, and thats all the happiness I could hope for.

I can completely understand why someone would not want to go to college, and quite frankly I was one of those people who did not consider going to college myself. To play devil's advocate, there are several valid reasons why some people do not want to go to college. For starters, it can be expensive. It can be time-consuming, especially if you have other obligations outside of school. And third, with platforms like social media, where it has now become possible to become a millionaire overnight. Or occupations like real estate, getting into the stock market, and so forth. People are discovering that you can make a decent living without having a degree. However, we must consider that at any given moment our economy could collapse as it did in 08’. I can recall many of my loved ones, especially my mother scrambling to find work and being turned down because she did not have a college education. It was certainly a tough time for everyone in my family. And those moments of disparity motivated me to go to college and push through while I was in school to finish and get my degree. Investing in higher education is the most important thing that one can do for themselves, you are securing your future. Also, you may lose a job, but you will never lose the knowledge you have gained. Aside from financial and job security, there are some experiences you just will not receive elsewhere. For starters, there is nothing like becoming a part of a student organization. To be able to create lasting bonds with other students is an amazing feeling. Or going to a football, basketball or any other sports event and showing off your school pride. One thing that you can get at college is the opportunity to meet various kinds of people. I recall taking a course on antisemitism, not just learning from a textbook but directly from a Jewish Rabbi and people from the Jewish community in my area. I also took a course called “Healing Through Storytelling,” where I was able to share, hear and connect with my peers through stories. One individual described what it was like to live in a hoarder's home. And another who witnessed her mother nearly committing suicide. These and several other experiences will stay with me for the rest of my life. Besides receiving a formal education, I have gained so much from my college experience. It is one of the best decisions and investments I have made for myself, I would hope if someone has the opportunity to go, to take advantage of it.

During my first years of college, I was battling both severe depression and anxiety, I was under a lot of pressure to succeed academically as well as trying to keep my head above water financially. I was working at a stressful hotel job, where the environment was toxic, and the clients were verbally abusive. Not to mention, my personal life was in turmoil too because I had a pattern of getting into emotionally abusive relationships with men but found myself not being the most pleasant around those I loved. I soon began to feel myself spiraling and found myself having a plethora of mental breakdowns and episodes of depression. I finally realized that I needed help and got into my school’s counseling services. From those sessions, I learned a lot about myself and dug up issues of my past, that had spilled over into my adult life. My childhood consisted of various traumas, that I never processed or received help for what I experienced. I had to come to terms with learning that I was a victim of emotional and sexual abuse. Therefore, I unintentionally held on to guilt and false narratives, which caused me to have these episodes of depression, along with not making the choices when it came to choosing a partner. This experience taught me that because I did not tend to my mental health, all of my internal turmoil began to manifest itself. I had to learn to heal from my past traumas, along with practicing self-care and self-preservation, and make myself a priority. I quit that stressful job and found one that did not compromise my mental health and allowed me to focus on school. I learned to create boundaries with the men I encountered and built stronger relationships with my loved ones. Making these changes was not something that happened overnight, and I am constantly working on myself. It was and still is a lengthy process. However, I became aware of how crucial mental health is and how it is such a stigma for many minority groups, especially in the African American community. This is the reason I decided to major in psychology and become a strong advocate for mental health. There is a tremendous number of people within my community who have dealt with unspeakable trauma, and who never got the opportunity to process and heal from their experiences. And the cycle will continue into the next generation if something is not done. I want to become a resource and provide resources for my community, so we all can experience healing and have a better understanding of ourselves.

There is an African proverb that states, "It takes a village to raise a child.” As a daughter of a single parent of three, my mother played the role of both a mother and father. Unfortunately, there was only so much she could do, and she did the best she could. However, when I look back at my childhood and teenage years, there are so many people I can thank for stepping up when I needed them. Like my neighbor who looked after me while my mother worked and treated me as if I were one of her own. Or another neighbor who stood up and patched me up, when I got into a tussle with some boys in the neighborhood. Or all of the staff members at my local Boys and Girls Club, who dared me to dream and helped build my self-esteem. What community means to me is like having an extended family. It is being surrounded by people who want nothing but the best for you and doing small acts of kindness, which is another way of showing love. I can say with all my heart that I would not be here today if I did not have a supportive community. My childhood was very chaotic, and I encountered various forms of trauma. I lived in a very financially unstable household, experiencing both emotional and sexual abuse, and even depression at such an early age. I would wake up every day questioning if I would be able to see tomorrow? Well, I am blessed to say that I did make it. I am 25, currently going after my bachelor's degree in psychology, it is tough, but I manage to keep a roof over my head, and I am currently in therapy to heal from those past traumas. I could have given up a long time ago, had it not been for my community pouring into me. My way of giving back is volunteering and helping those younger than me, by inspiring and empowering them to believe they can achieve anything they put their minds to. What I see in my future is one where I continue to break generational curses within my family. To be able to have a solid financially, mentally, and healthy family unit. I want to create what I did not have growing up. I want to build up my own children, so they do not experience what I experienced growing up. And to also do the same for someone else's child who may be enduring what I went through. Because its all a cycle, it is a cycle and pattern that will continue if someone does not stand up and make a conscious decision to change it.

The most inspiring book I have ever read was Maya Angelou's "I Know Why the Cage Bird Sings". This book was captivating to me for many different reasons. Ms. Angelou had a way of capturing the innocence and curiosity of a child and how sometimes the people around them can leave an impression on them in both negative and positive ways. Also, this book resonates with me so much, because it was like someone else was reading my life's story back to me. Like, Ms. Angelou, I felt like I was the black sheep in my family, school, and in my community. I was the awkward little black girl, who was always misunderstood, and no one could quite figure me out, so I was cast aside. Another connection we shared was the same traumatic experience of being sexually abused by a family member. The way she expressed, how the experience took her voice and power from her, was so heartbreaking and yet moving at the same time because she found the courage to speak and live in her truth. This book was ahead of its time because at that time it was pulling back the curtain on the family dynamic of African Americans, which even today is hard to discuss because of certain issues like sexual abuse. Another wonderful thing about this book was discussing the missteps of Ms. Angelou and how she overcame and learned from them. Reading this book not only inspired me, but it brought me comfort. Because my childhood was chaotic and there were times, I did not think I would make it this far. But knowing that someone who looks like me and shared the same experiences as I had persevered is something that I will keep with me for the rest of my life.