Being a first generation college graduate will mean fulfilling my immigrant father's wishes of actually having a better life than him. He's sacrificed everything to immigrate here from Turkey in the late 1980s and has worked tirelessly since in mundane office jobs that feel torturous to him, simply to put food on the table. He never went to college or even finished high school, for that matter, so he's always reiterated to my brother and I how important education was. If we complained about school, like any teenager does, he'd say, "I know it must be hard, but stick it out. You have to be better than me, and the only way to do that is to go further than me." While my older brother never really had any interest in school, even to this day, I was the complete opposite. His encouragement pushed me to be the best I could be academically, get the best grades I possibly could, and strive to be at least top 5 in the class. While I don't have the flashiest grades, didn't take all AP's in high school, I have always and consistently done my best, which my father has said time and time again is more than enough. He always says that he's proud of me solely for graduating high school, but I want to make him even prouder. My ultimate goal is to go to med-school and become an MD. Eventually, after residency, I want to be a dermatologist for three reasons. First, I absolutely adore skin. I actually got my NYS esthetics license before graduation high school through BOCES. Second, I've always wanted to be a doctor of some sort. I never quite knew what specialty, but now, after taking my esthetics course, I do. Third, I wish to be able to take care of my father. He's never really known financial stability, neither have I, but his main reason for us to keep going with education is that so my brother and I can finally be comfortable financially with the 'big, cushy job', as he puts it, that he was never able to get. All of this has helped shape me into the best scholar I could be. I never skip my classes, as a college freshman, I never miss an assignment, and I always go to office hours. I can't fathom the idea of me skipping the classes that will help me achieve everything I want in life not only for myself, but for the man who's literally sacrificed everything for me. He is the reason I force myself to class on days I don't truly have motivation, he's the reason for late-night study sessions so I can get the highest score I possibly can manage on my exams, he's the reason I go above and beyond to help my classmates with studying so that it helps me solidify my understanding as well. The classes are difficult, and I find myself questioning if I even belong in the same room as students who have high school credits to high heaven, AP's I couldn't even dream about, and internships already under their belts as freshman. However, whenever I question 'what am I doing here?', I remember my goals, I remember the dinnerless nights because my father had to pay a certain bill on time, I remember the countless toys I had to put down in the toy store so that money could go to a bill or to groceries. I remember my Baba. And I remember that I'm the only one who can make it happen.

Ever since I was little, I've always wanted to be a doctor. Most children wanted to be pop stars or astronauts, but not me. I loved science, and it always came easy to me, but that wasn't what drove me towards medicine. I have always been the 'medically challenged' one in my family. Especially ever since 2018. I had developed a rare anxiety-based neurological disorder, Functional Movement Disorder. But, I didn't get diagnosed until late 2020. For two years, I experienced violent body tremors, tremors that handicapped and completely altered my life, with not even the slightest notion as to why they occurred. My family and I were helpless as we searched for relief, consulting with doctor after doctor, going to hospital after hospital. Yet nobody could give us the results we needed, the answers we desperately searched for. Until one doctor sent us upstate. Finally getting that diagnosis was everything to me. It was a feeling that not many could understand. But I could. And every other sick child with disorders and syndromes like mine could understand. We could all understand the desperate, frantic search for respite, the countless medical bills stacking up and looming over a family. The doctor who diagnosed me finally gave my family and me the answer to the question that had been looming over us like a dark, shadow-like cloud: Why is this happening? I want to be that person. I want to be the doctor who answers the question and swats that dark cloud away from families. So, at the ripe age of thirteen, I had made my decision. I became hellbent on pursuing a medical education, and nothing could stop me. I've been the patient on the bed before, the scared, overwhelmed, utterly exhausted patient who simply wanted an answer. But now? In the future? I want to be on the other side of the bed. I want to be the doctor who comforts that patient's fears and worries. The doctor who changes that patient's life, who supports and encourages their patient, who reminds them that they're much more than whatever is holding them back. This life experience has shaped me in many ways and has helped me appreciate the little things we often take for granted. And this life experience set my future in stone. I will be a doctor someday. And I will help countless individuals. While I don't exactly know what specialty I plan to achieve this through, I do know that I will be the one to change the course of someone's life, the same way that one doctor altered the course of mine.

Ever since I was little, I've always wanted to be a doctor. Most children wanted to be pop stars or astronauts, but not me. I loved science, and it always came easy to me, but that wasn't what drove me towards medicine. I have always been the 'medically challenged' one in my family. Especially ever since 2018. I had developed a rare anxiety-based neurological disorder, Functional Movement Disorder. But, I didn't get diagnosed until late 2020. For two years, I experienced violent body tremors, tremors that handicapped and completely altered my life, with not even the slightest notion as to why they occurred. My family and I were helpless as we searched for relief, consulting with doctor after doctor, going to hospital after hospital. Yet nobody could give us the results we needed, the answers we desperately searched for. Until one doctor sent us upstate. Finally getting that diagnosis was everything to me. It was a feeling that not many could understand. But I could. And every other sick child with disorders and syndromes like mine could understand. We could all understand the desperate, frantic search for respite, the countless medical bills stacking up and looming over a family. The doctor who diagnosed me finally gave my family and me the answer to the question that had been looming over us like a dark shadow-like cloud: Why is this happening? I want to be that person. I want to be the doctor who answers the question and swats that dark cloud away from families. So, at the ripe age of thirteen, I had made my decision. I became hellbent on pursuing a medical education and nothing could possibly stop me. I've been the patient on the bed before, the scared, overwhelmed, utterly exhausted patient who simply wanted an answer. But now? In the future? I want to be on the other side of the bed. I want to be the doctor who comforts that patient's fears and worries. The doctor who changes that patient's life, who supports and encourages their patient, who reminds them that they're much more than whatever is holding them back. This life experience has shaped me in many ways and has helped me appreciate the little things we often take for granted. And this life experience set my future in stone. I will be a doctor someday. And I will help countless individuals. While I don't exactly know what specialty I plan to achieve this through, I do know that I will be the one to change the course of someone's life, the same way that one doctor altered the course of mine.

Ever since I was little, I've always wanted to be a doctor. Most children wanted to be pop stars or astronauts, but not me. I loved science, and it always came easy to me, but that wasn't what drove me towards medicine. I have always been the 'medically challenged' one in my family. Especially ever since 2018. I had developed a rare anxiety-based neurological disorder, Functional Movement Disorder. But, I didn't get diagnosed until late 2020. For two years, I experienced violent body tremors, tremors that handicapped and completely altered my life, with not even the slightest notion as to why they occurred. My family and I were helpless as we searched for relief, consulting with doctor after doctor, going to hospital after hospital. Yet nobody could give us the results we needed, the answers we desperately searched for. Until one doctor sent us upstate. Finally getting that diagnosis was everything to me. It was a feeling that not many could understand. But I could. And every other sick child with disorders and syndromes like mine could understand. We could all understand the desperate, frantic search for respite, the countless medical bills stacking up and looming over a family. The doctor who diagnosed me finally gave my family and me the answer to the question that had been looming over us like a dark shadow-like cloud: Why is this happening? I want to be that person. I want to be the doctor who answers the question and swats that dark cloud away from families. So, at the ripe age of thirteen, I had made my decision. I became hellbent on pursuing a medical education and nothing could possibly stop me. I've been the patient on the bed before, the scared, overwhelmed, utterly exhausted patient who simply wanted an answer. But now? In the future? I want to be on the other side of the bed. I want to be the doctor who comforts that patient's fears and worries. The doctor who changes that patient's life, who supports and encourages their patient, who reminds them that they're much more than whatever is holding them back. This life experience has shaped me in many ways and has helped me appreciate the little things we often take for granted. And this life experience set my future in stone. I will be a doctor someday. And I will help countless individuals. While I don't exactly know what specialty I plan to achieve this through, I do know that I will be the one to change the course of someone's life, the same way that one doctor altered the course of mine.