On May 22nd, 2019, I lost my eldest brother Chance to an overdose. My brother was the perfect older brother. He helped me learn how to ride a bike, tie my shoes, and help me when I needed it. I was 14 when my brother passed but even though I was not a kid, I still needed my older brother. He was one of the sweetest and kindest people I knew. He made friends wherever he went and anyone who knew him would say the same thing, “Chance was just a ball of light and joy”. Ever since Chance was 15, he had struggled with drug abuse. There were several times he attempted to quit but he ended up relapsing. After two failed rehab attempts, he tried again in 2017. During his time in rehab, you could see just how much he was trying to become sober. He left rehab after several months and moved to California. For a year, Chance was sober. He had a job, and friends and he loved to travel. During his year of sobriety, he continued to help others to become sober. We assume that maybe he had a rough day and he used again. He used the same amount he used to use before he was sober but because he had been sober for so long, he ended up overdosing. If I were to start a business with Chance, it would be to continue the work he did to help people who suffered from drug abuse. We would start a rehab to help those who wanted to stop but didn’t know how. My brother knew the pain of being addicted and wanted to help those become sober. I saw the brightness and light in my brother when he became sober and I know I would want to help others to see that same light in them. My brother wanted nothing more than to help people and I would continue to do so by helping people rehabilitate after drug use with him. We would work with people, step by step, and one foot in front of the other. My brother would offer his support and sympathy by relating to the difficulty of becoming sober. My brother would be satisfied with his life if he knew that he had helped people become clean just like he did.

On May 22nd, 2019, I returned home from school, and I found my mother sitting on the couch. You could physically feel the depressing aura in the air. I immediately knew something was wrong, but I wasn't prepared for exactly how tragic the news was. My mother sat me down on the couch and told me that my eldest brother, Chance, had passed away. When I first heard the news, I thought she was joking. I thought there was no way she was telling me the truth, so my brain just assumed it was a joke. I needed it to be a joke. Chance was 22 when he died, and he passed away from an overdose. My brother has always been my perfect older brother; he taught me to ride a bike, tie my shoes, and help me when needed. I was 14 when my brother died and even though I was older, I still needed my older brother. He was one of the funniest and kindest people I have ever known, and I couldn't believe he was gone. On March 29th, 2023, I was in my Zoology class in my junior year of high school. I was told that I was being sent home early and that my parent was waiting outside. With a joyful smile, I walked down the halls of my school, thrilled that I could leave early. When I got outside, I saw my father’s car. My father had never once called me out of school before, so I was automatically confused. When I entered his car, I immediately felt the same depressing aura I felt the day Chance died. I asked my father what was wrong, and he told me that my other older brother, Gage, had died. I remember when I found out I didn't cry at first, I didn’t think it was a joke like last time. All I said was, “Again?”. I only thought how unfair it was that most people don’t even lose one sibling but the fact I had lost two was cruel. When Chance had passed, I remember that Gage and I grieved the loss of our brother together but now that Gage had died, who was I going to grieve with now? Gage died of suicide at the age of 20. He passed away a day before his 21st birthday. My family and I had plans with Gage to celebrate his 21st birthday together. The days after his death were harder than Chance’s because we were all thinking the same thing together, how does this happen again? Chance and Gage were my only two older brothers and all I thought while grieving Gage’s death was the fact that older brothers are meant to protect and guide their younger sister. What am I meant to do now without my brothers? Neither Gage nor Chance got a high school degree or even went to college. I was the first out of my three older siblings to graduate high school, and I remember when I graduated high school, I knew my brothers were proud of me. Their deaths encouraged me to live a life and pursue a career that would make me happy. I know when I finally receive my college degree, I will feel my brothers clapping for me in the crowd.