My name is Ella DeSpain, and I am pursuing a degree in English Literature at the University of North Texas in Denton. I am incredibly passionate about literature, especially in the way it shapes our perceptions and communal awareness of the world. When we take classes on British Literature or American Literature, or any English class at all, there is a canonically correct idea that students are given. Most of the time, the voice heard in these classes that has the strongest influence on us is white and male. Speaking from personal experience, my Texas English classes taught Shakespeare, Henry David Thoreau, Charles Dickens, and more. Though these texts are good and valuable, they don't represent a comprehensive worldview and therefore stunt students not only in their education, but in their real-world compassion for and understanding of others. At the University of North Texas, I have been lucky enough to study many minority writers including voices of those who have been colonized and suffered from imperialism, victims of racism in America, and so much more. This has made me realize what a disservice my education has done for me and the massive need for change. By allowing unheard voices in for the first time, we completely change our own perception, and eventually change the culture around us. I am interested in how it is decided who gets published, what voices are allowed to have the majority of our collective attention. There are institutional barriers which prevent people of color, women, LGBTQIA people, and other minorities from publishing their voices and shaping their societies. This is an issue of the past especially, as texts from colonized peoples are erased or nonexistent. As Literary education majorly focuses on literature of the past, this leads to an incomplete understanding of history and of the human experience. In my career, I hope to bring attention to formerly marginalized voices in order to create a more loving and compassionate world. There are firsthand accounts that offer a worldview contrary to the popular beliefs of the time that should be brought to light. Even in the current day, all voices are important and deserve publication. I believe that literature is how we understand ourselves and the world around us, and that allowing a more diverse literary landscape will benefit everyone. After civilizations are gone, we understand them by their art and especially by their writing. The popular voice that our civilization has chosen is one that is wealthy, white, and male. While this kind of voice certainly does deserve representation in the public sphere, it should not be allowed the majority of it, especially as it does not accurately represent the population. In order to foster love and understanding, as well as just historical accuracy, I will work in my career toward publishing minority voices.

In the years I have spent waiting tables while in college, I have served thousands of exhausted women who cut their toddlers’ food into pieces while their husbands enjoy hot meals. I have listened in classes where ignorant young men lead conversations about Silvia Plath and Virginia Wolfe. I have sat in cross-legged circles with my female friends and fought tears while we share the kind of stories we all have. The experience of womanhood is often accompanied by the knowledge that the men that surround us will never understand, and the fear that they may never try to. I am passionate about female empowerment because my sister stays awake through the night to feed her newborn and then goes to work in the morning. I am passionate because I taught a kindergarten class where little girls were spoken over every day. I am passionate because I know that a new generation of young women will change the way the world thinks and operates, and I feel a responsibility to help make that change. My senior year of high school, I was accepted into an internship program that was initially meant to help me volunteer in gynecology clinics, helping women gain control of their health and fertility. This was my passion, showing women that their health matters and that there are healthcare professionals who think so. However, a global pandemic led to the clinics in my hometown of Amarillo, Texas closing down, and I was left with an internship in a kindergarten classroom. Initially displeased, I spent a year making the best of it and discovering a passion for education and teaching children to be open hearted as well open minded. I am currently pursuing a degree in English at the University of North Texas to pursue that passion. I believe that literature is the basis of how we form ideas about ourselves and the world around us. It is the medium through which we learn all information and are inspired to think for ourselves. I plan to use literature to show young women those who have come before them and how that can inform their futures. Even focusing on female characters and highlighting female authors will be a change in our school systems and a step toward a world where women feel comfortable enough to take back some power. I have been so lucky to have been educated by brilliant women who have overcome the struggles that befell them and are able to share their perspectives with me. These women grade papers harder than any others, but they are the ones who have helped me grow and have showed me the need for each of us to prepare to make a change. I hope to be that kind of shaping force in young women’s lives and will take care to make sure that the actions I take every day will reflect that. Texas is known to be a red zone for the war on women. Our governors, our mayors, our judges, these men all look the same and think the same way. Now more than ever there is fear surrounding womanhood in Texas, and this fear is meant to keep us oppressed and out of positions of power. While it is at times frightening to be a woman in the state of Texas, I feel a loyalty to this area and a need to make change. The weight I feel is the weight that every woman feels, and I am excited to have an opportunity to influence young girls before they feel that weight.