It goes without saying that Western culture places great value on material things, superficial qualities like appearance, socioeconomic status, and beliefs rise social platforms have unintendedly highlighted these issues for our younger generations. Personally, I’ve struggled with self-acceptance and self-love having grown up as a first-generation American and during the rise of social media I was constantly conscious of the amount of likes my photos got. Unfortunately, the only way I sought immediate relief was to not participate with social media platforms at all for a while and to work on the internal factors that were causing my unhappiness. I began to use exercise as an outlet going for a run helped clear my head. Self-love is not simply exercising and eating healthy, however, it’s the voice inside our head which dictates how we view ourselves. Ironically what began my journey to self-acceptance was an app that texted me kind reminders to be kind to myself, I bought a self-care journal at Barnes and Noble that forced me to write everyday things I did right and to express how I contributed positively to others that day. Through the daily practice of self-love those around me noticed a difference in my behavior I was more positive, happy, and patient with others. Ultimately happiness those of individuals and all people comes from within all of us we really do absorb each other’s energy when someone is kind in a public place to a complete stranger those are more inclined to spread kindness. My mother always had a saying, “leave a place better than you found it.” I know now this comes from within we need to bring the energy we want to receive. My plan is to continue to practice self-love daily and to bring these principals of positive energy in to my profession.

Late January of 2021 my mother passed away after a two-week fight with COVID-19 she was only 46. However, this wasn’t her first health battle, my mother had been fighting for her health since she was diagnosed with End-stage renal disease at the age of 22. Growing up with a chronically ill parent taught me to be a fighter early on to have grit, however, losing my mother has proved uniquely because it feels as though a part of me also died with her. I always had her in my corner inspiring me to push through hardship and now I had to look deep within myself to fight on my own without her physical presence. My mother’s death forced me to view my whole life in a new perspective, I had not been placing my education at the forefront I’d been sacrificing my dreams. Suddenly, it dawned on me that if life is not being lived happy it’s not being lived you’re just going through the motions and from this point I decided I would do everything in my power to prioritize the things that mattered to me the most, spending more time with my three year old son, time to finish my Bachelor’s degree to achieve my goal. Although my mother is not here with me physically I can feel her embrace when I choose happiness over sadness, I can feel her warmth when I watch my son reach a milestone, and I will fight to make her proud of me when I graduate college Summer of 2022.

“Daughter, growing up in America will feel like having to walk an uphill and treacherous trail while watching others take the scenic route paved trail, but the difference will be that when you all get to the destination your legs will be stronger because of the hardship you faced.” These words were my father’s response to me when I confided in him about feeling stressed due to racism going on in my high school. As a first-generation Mexican American my cultural experience has brought both enrichment and challenges to my life that have equally shaped the way I envision my future and the future of my children. One of my first challenges was that I learned Spanish as a first language and entered school not knowing any English, I experienced a complete immersion of culture at kindergarten. I was exposed to a whole new language and social norms different from what I learned at home. While it was a challenge to learn English later in the end, I had the advantage of becoming bilingual which would allow me a passport into fully understanding Mexican and American Culture. Both my parents taught me norms of Mexican culture, which shifted slightly from the different regions they were from. My father is from Jalisco, Mexico were Mariachi music rules, in Mexico music is a very important part of culture. There was always Mariachi playing in my home whether we were celebrating or mourning. My mother was a cooking enthusiastic, so my home always had fresh salsa made from scratch to go with a variety of dishes and her staple was making tamales for virtually all holidays different from the usual thanksgiving set up with turkey and mashed potatoes. After moving from a diverse Bay Area to a small farming community in Butte County, California I first experienced direct racism at a diner my family and I walked in and a silence fell over the restaurant, I noticed we were the only people of color in the entire restaurant and we got quite a few mean looks but because I was 13 I didn’t completely understand this was racism and I hadn’t done nothing wrong instead what was done to me was wrong. There was another instance when I was walking down my street and I was called a racial slur by some teenage boys in a red truck with a confederate flag, I knew what they did was wrong, however, as a 15 year old girl in that short instant I wished I wasn’t Mexican, I thought, "my life would be easier if I wasn't different". Thankfully, this mindset changed with time and even with higher education. My college courses taught me a great deal about how racism stems from fear and from systems with a means to control power. Racism both direct and implicit is perhaps the hardest challenge of being a first-generation American feeling like your identity is little bit harder to find or justify because many see you as a foreigner in your own birthplace. Its the way individuals or even the media make fun of cultural norms that make it challenging for immigrants and first generation Americans to feel confident and succeed in many areas of life. Experiencing racism has been a formative experience for me and has helped shaped me today, I chose to enter a profession in education because of my experience and I’m passionate about preserving my Mexican culture and it’s integrity for my children. I'm proud to say I'm a first-generation Mexican American and I'm happy to share my culture and embrace the culture of others. My vision for the future is that I will see a United States strengthened by our differences and not divided. Thank you for your consideration.

From as early as I can remember my parents struggled with financial adversity, as Mexican immigrants they often worked low wage jobs to make sure we had enough to eat and a roof over our heads. In the beginning I felt shame to not be wearing the name brand shoes every other kid was wearing at school and to live in a small apartment, however, as I began to change my mindset and began to appreciate the sacrifices my parents made so that I could have a better life than they did, everything for me changed. I began to view my financial adversity as a sort of life lesson, instead of a curse, I started to focus my energy on schoolwork and other hobbies and to focus on what I had versus what I didn’t have. I started to take an interest to learn about Mexican heritage on a deeper level, it’s literature, music, and popular culture when I turned 17 and finally visited family members that lived in Mexico I had an enriching experience one I wouldn’t have had if I hadn’t began to appreciate my culture. Growing up in financial hardship also meant I had to work a full-time job while attending college to support myself while many of my peers were going off to college dorm rooms I was submitting resumes to dozens of clinics to get a job. A sense of urgency always kept me going and I found a great full-time job and continued my college education part-time. Along the way both paying for school and carving out enough time for studies has not always been easy, but I always knew that if I kept my mindset clear, had faith in my ability, and persevered through my adversity it could actually be my greatest strength. If my parents could come to a new country with no money in their pockets, learn a whole new language and culture and thrive, I would not make excuses and I would attend and finish college. Presently, I have no plans of giving up on my dreams and I’m very proud of my roots I’m proud to come from an immigrant family and ironically I’m happy I experience financial adversity growing up it made me who I am today a more humbled and appreciative person because of it. The experience of financial adversity also shaped my ability to be resilient and once my bachelor’s degree of science is complete Summer of 2022, I plan to attend graduate school and realize our American Dream.

Resilience, the dictionary defines resilience as the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties, toughness. Growing up as a first generation Mexican American I learned early that resilience was paramount to personal success and the resilience we display during difficulty carries a positive impact in our personal lives and in our community, an impact so strong that it can ripple out into the world. During my most formative years, I watched how my mother struggled with a physically debilitating disease every day, but still managed to smile and push through the physical pain with grace and determination. The experience of having my mother diagnosed with End-stage renal disease when I was only two years of age shaped my understanding of myself and ultimately impacted how I view the world. Once I reached the age of 10 I began translating for my mother during her medical appointments, here I began to notice the positive impact my bilingual and bicultural ability made for my mother and the impact it made on her health for the first time I felt important and had a purpose. The experience of having my mother battle a chronic illness for the majority of my life has shaped me in a sense that I’ve placed a great value on maintaining my personal health avoiding the use of any illicit substances, eating a healthy well balanced diet, and exercising and more importantly working on my mental health. Part of resilience is the ability to recover during hardship and I’ve found that when I practice self-care a simple five-minute meditation or writing in my journal allows me to recharge and take care of myself and others better. There were always set-backs in my mom’s condition, affordability of healthcare services, ineffectiveness of medication, and inequitable healthcare received because of her Hispanic heritage, however, in spite all of this my mother remained the most grateful and fun loving person I ever knew. Because of her disease I chose a career helping others, I first attended technical school after High School graduation and became a Medical Assistant, helping doctors from all specialties meet their mission of providing patients quality healthcare, I was always met with Latin-x patients that thanked me for my translation and empathy for delivering “quality care,” I always knew the reason I am so passionate in my profession was because of my ability to be resilient in the face of difficulty and adversity. When there were changes at work and my colleagues complained I always tried to look for the bright side of change, when many of my peers told me it was too difficult to get my degree and work and full-time job, I stayed up late nights and early mornings studying. Resilience has gotten me here and resilience kept my mother alive for many more years than statistics stated. Unfortunately, my mother passed away this year succumbing to a lifelong struggle with health, however, my experience of being her daughter and learning from her resilience from a young age taught me we all have a purpose, we all choose to be happy in spite any challenges we may face, we determine how we react to what happens to us and things will not always come easy, however, our resilience will allow us to see the light and perhaps be a light to show others a way through to make a meaningful impact in the world.