My name is Elisabeth. I am a 30-year-old full-time single mom, working full-time and attending school full-time to earn my Bachelor's degree in Marine Biology. My son, Jev Alister, is the reason I wake up in the morning and why I am pursuing a degree. He is the absolute light of my life, and I don't know where I would be without him. His existence has saved me more times than I can count, and I honestly cannot say who is luckier to have in their life, me or him. I have regrets in my life, but having him has never been one of them. Jev is 5 years old now, and if you had told me after he was born that he would still be here, thriving, and starting Kindergarten, I'm not sure I would have believed you. I was told by my doctor throughout my entire pregnancy that I was going to have a healthy baby, everything was fine, and his father and I would be able to take him home after the standard time. After going through 18 hours of labor and feeling my entire C-section, he was finally born! After waking up in recovery, I was told that he was admitted into the NICU and was in terrible shape. Once I was transported to my room, a team of doctors came in to have me sign multiple forms for various purposes. He needed frozen platelets because his blood wasn't clotting. He had a very severe heart murmur. After an echo, they found four holes in his heart and coarctation of his aorta. His right lung had collapsed with his first cry; he was intubated immediately after birth, and a chest tube was inserted. He ended up having his first open heart surgery at 3 days old and his second at 3 months old. He got his g-tube at 1 month old and his tracheostomy at 6 months old. I quit my job, and when Jev was 2 weeks old, I moved into the hospital so I could be more involved and to be there for him in case he took a turn for the worse, which happened often in the beginning, since the hospital was 4 hours away from our house. As Jev's parents, we made the difficult decision to get him transferred to the Children's Hospital of Philadelphia from Norton Children's in Louisville, Kentucky, since they would be able to take care of his growing list of diagnoses. We were told that CHOP was the only hospital in the country that could care for him because he was so complex. Jev spent the first year and a half of his life in the hospital having more than 20 different surgeries and procedures, and I was by his side for everything. I learned so much about being a medical mom and how to be a fantastic advocate for him. I have moved Heaven and Earth for him, I have gone head-to-head with doctors and nurses, and I have moved states away from family to make sure he has had the best care possible. I divorced his dad so I could be a happier mom for him, to be the mom he deserves. I have become a stronger, more assertive person. I am taking better care of myself so I can make sure I am here for as long as I can be to take care of him. I have had to be his physical therapist, his speech therapist, his nurse, and his doctor, in addition to being his mom, but I wouldn't change a single thing.

After spending many years with an abusive stepfather, I was more at ease and happier when my mom became single. I would take wearing hand-me-down clothes, once-a-month trips to McDonald's to get a $1 ice cream cone and a happy meal, no piano lessons, and being responsible for keeping the house clean and cooking dinner almost every day, over my mom being with an angry and controlling man. As a single mom myself, I have gained a deeper understanding of the sacrifices she made. I realize how much sleep she lost and how many days she went without food to ensure that we were clean, fed, and had a roof over our heads. She even managed to meet some of our wants, not just our needs. I can only imagine the number of nights she cried herself to sleep, worrying about how she would get through the next day and pay the bills. My childhood has shaped me in ways I am still uncovering. Every day spent with my son, as I do everything I can for him and learn more about who he is as a person, deepens my understanding of unconditional love. I genuinely believe that my mom did her best, but I also recognize that she could have done much better. I definitely could use some therapy, but I know I am a stronger person because I didn't have a choice to be anything else. I'm not saying my experiences were all good or all bad; there was a lot of both. There were moments I wished I could have experienced more of, like going fishing, camping, or having fun with my family. However, there are also many moments I wish hadn't happened at all, such as the different men coming in and out of our lives, the neglect from my mom, and the abuse from my brother. My son will not have a mom who chooses not to keep him safe and protected, who doesn't want to take him to the doctor or dentist, or a mom who doesn't encourage his dreams, wants, and desires. As I prove that it's possible to raise a child who is like me, just with some added medical complications, in a happy and loving environment, I have the fantastic opportunity to watch him thrive in every way possible. I am doing my best, and I get validation for my efforts when I get positive feedback from his teachers, nurses, and doctors on his progress. I am far from the perfect mom. I lose my temper, and I get overstimulated often, but my son feels safe and loved, and that's more than I can say for me at his age of 5. My mom chose to be single and raise her children alone, and as much as I love her and respect her for that choice, my childhood was still difficult. It was not an easy decision, but her taking that initiative made it a lot easier for me to follow in her path and put my child before a relationship with someone. If I didn't grow up with a single mom, I would not be the mom I am today, and I am grateful that my son is getting this version of me, because he deserves every opportunity in life, and I will be there to help him with that.