I don't get to make my own decisions. When illness takes over a person's life, that is the main subject that their life is planned around. My mental health has been the biggest challenge that I have faced in my life. Having struggled with mental illness since I was in the third grade, I do not remember life without that constant dark cloud looming over me. It has caused me to learn more about myself than I would like to have. Because of this forced maturity, my experience with mental health has changed what I thought the course of my life would be. It has altered it for better and for worse. While it has made me stronger it has also robbed me of my innocence and naivety. I had to grow up faster than I would have liked and didn't get to do all the things I wanted to do. My OCD made it difficult to make friends and go out in public, my anxiety made it hard to function throughout the school day and in performances, and the fatigue caused by my depression robbed me of memories I could have made and countless hours with my friends and family. Overall, I missed out on a lot because of my mental illnesses, but it has made me a stronger person and a more fierce advocate for the mental health conversation. When deciding on my career path, I knew that I needed to do something to help others. The connection that I have to psychology is unique and I feel that I have an advantage when speaking with others about their struggles. I have something to compare and relate back to so that I can better understand where they are coming from. Working in the mental health field feels like such a perfect fit for someone in my situation. Knowing what struggling feels like is a strong motivator to do everything that I can for others. My goals are to help as many people as I possibly can throughout my life and to use my struggles to aid in the healing of others. I want to use the battles that I have been through and make them serve a purpose. Being able to take my previous captor and conquer it for the benefit of others is an empowering process that I want to strive toward throughout my whole life. Mental illness is a hindrance in relationships, to say the least. The isolation and fatigue that it causes have made friendships and romantic relationships impossible to manage at times. These struggles have revealed to me which friendships are strong enough to endure neglect. It reveals that the friends in these relationships love me enough to stay even when they are not gaining anything from the friendship. Mental illness is such a lonely disease because, by nature, it causes the victim to push others away. In my experience, in order to keep friendships, I have to fake happiness enough to make the other members comfortable. This works until there is a strong enough blow by my mental illnesses to overpower the acting that is taking place. It is a blessing and a curse, in a way, to lose certain friendships because of mental illness. It has made the relationships that have persevered stronger and made me wiser when choosing which relationships to put my time into. Nothing in the world is given for free, you have to work for it all. I sincerely wish that it wasn't this way, but there needs to be a lot of change before it isn't. When your entire worth is put into what you can do for others, those suffering from mental illness are cast aside. The debilitation that comes can take a person out of society completely and hinder them from making any progress. For me, striving to keep up with my peers is like running a race with a 25-pound weight while everyone else runs free. Putting twice the effort in to just barely keep up has been a constant battle throughout my life. The world is unforgiving to people that can't do things for others. It is not a place that is going to be understanding of circumstances or struggles. That is why I am such a strong advocate for support for those who are struggling. It is not the victim's fault that they are behind and it is unfair to treat everyone equally. Equity is what we need to strive for to make the world a more loving place. It is not just leveling the playing field anymore. It is giving everyone what they need to have the abilities to reach the same goals, even if some are getting more than others. Those that are struggling need more help than others and it should not be something that is shameful or degrading, rather, it should be out of love for one another that we are willing to give more. Mental health awareness is necessary for countless reasons. For those that do not understand what it is like to go through a mental illness, it is difficult to understand why victims can't do the things that they can with the same ease. My goals throughout my life have been shaped greatly by my mental health. I have realized that in order to make real change, I need to be brave and open with what I have gone through so that others can learn from me. I have had to go through trials that others have not, but I will not let those stop me from doing everything that I can to help those like me who need support.

Most times, the best solutions to problems are the most simple ones. In the case of mental health, I believe that the best way to help more people is to simply talk about it. Far too often I have seen those I love that struggle and be ashamed of what they are going through. Shame and fear are two things that a person struggling with a mental illness does not need to add to their worries. The more mental illness is talked about, the more the stigma around it dissipates. I have had the blessing of struggling with mental illness for most of my life. In the past, I saw my struggles as a curse. Now, I see what I have gone through as a tool to help others. The more I have opened up about my mental health, the more love and support I have received. While I have has the occasional heckler, my openness about my struggles has brought me so much freedom. It has also made others more comfortable asking questions about mental illness and asking for my help when they are struggling. I have had the opportunity to help so many of my peers because of my bravery and willingness to discuss my mental health. People are always so quick to shed a tear for those who have lost their lives to suicide but do not want to listen to those who are struggling. They dismiss their pain as a cry for attention or view them as a disgrace. The more the conversation around mental health grows, the less shame the victims feel and the more compassion they receive. Just having the knowledge of what a person is struggling with can make all the difference in how people treat them.

I don't get to make my own decisions. When illness takes over a person's life, that is the main subject that their life is planned around. My mental health has been the biggest challenge that I have faced in my life. Having struggled with mental illness since I was in the third grade, I do not remember life without that constant dark cloud looming over me. It has caused me to learn more about myself than I would like to have. Because of this forced maturity, my experience with mental health has changed what I thought the course of my life would be. It has altered it for better and for worse. While it has made me stronger it has also robbed me of my innocence and naivety. I had to grow up faster than I would have liked and didn't get to do all the things I wanted to do. My OCD made it difficult to make friends and go out in public, my anxiety made it hard to function throughout the school day and in performances, and the fatigue caused by my depression robbed me of memories I could have made and countless hours with my friends and family. Overall, I missed out on a lot because of my mental illnesses, but it has made me a stronger person and a more fierce advocate for the mental health conversation. When deciding on my career path, I knew that I needed to do something to help others. The connection that I have to psychology is unique and I feel that I have an advantage when speaking with others about their struggles. I have something to compare and relate back to so that I can better understand where they are coming from. Working in the mental health field feels like such a perfect fit for someone in my situation. Knowing what struggling feels like is a strong motivator to do everything that I can for others. My goals are to help as many people as I possibly can throughout my life and to use my struggles to aid in the healing of others. I want to use the battles that I have been through and make them serve a purpose. Being able to take my previous captor and conquer it for the benefit of others is an empowering process that I want to strive toward throughout my whole life. Mental illness is a hindrance in relationships, to say the least. The isolation and fatigue that it causes have made friendships and romantic relationships impossible to manage at times. These struggles have revealed to me which friendships are strong enough to endure neglect. It reveals that the friends in these relationships love me enough to stay even when they are not gaining anything from the friendship. Mental illness is such a lonely disease because, by nature, it causes the victim to push others away. In my experience, in order to keep friendships, I have to fake happiness enough to make the other members comfortable. This works until there is a strong enough blow by my mental illnesses to overpower the acting that is taking place. It is a blessing and a curse, in a way, to lose certain friendships because of mental illness. It has made the relationships that have persevered stronger and made me wiser when choosing which relationships to put my time into. Nothing in the world is given for free, you have to work for it all. I sincerely wish that it wasn't this way, but there needs to be a lot of change before it isn't. When your entire worth is put into what you can do for others, those suffering from mental illness are cast aside. The debilitation that comes can take a person out of society completely and hinder them from making any progress. For me, striving to keep up with my peers is like running a race with a 25-pound weight while everyone else runs free. Putting twice the effort in to just barely keep up has been a constant battle throughout my life. The world is unforgiving to people that can't do things for others. It is not a place that is going to be understanding of circumstances or struggles. That is why I am such a strong advocate for support for those who are struggling. It is not the victim's fault that they are behind and it is unfair to treat everyone equally. Equity is what we need to strive for to make the world a more loving place. It is not just leveling the playing field anymore. It is giving everyone what they need to have the abilities to reach the same goals, even if some are getting more than others. Those that are struggling need more help than others and it should not be something that is shameful or degrading, rather, it should be out of love for one another that we are willing to give more. Mental health awareness is necessary for countless reasons. For those that do not understand what it is like to go through a mental illness, it is difficult to understand why victims can't do the things that they can with the same ease. My goals throughout my life have been shaped greatly by my mental health. I have realized that in order to make real change, I need to be brave and open with what I have gone through so that others can learn from me. I have had to go through trials that others have not, but I will not let those stop me from doing everything that I can to help those like me who need support.