Being five years old and living in a homeless shelter is an experience that I wouldn't wish on my greatest enemy. Especially when before that, you had the taste of financial freedom. In my childhood, my earlier memories were of a big house, dolls, and trying on my mom's expensive jewelry. Then, the memories blur as I begin to move from place to place and count quarters to buy a happy meal. I did not understand what was happening until I grew up. It'e only then that I understood, that money is a terrible master but an excellent servant. The trauma begins with my family. My father had an excellent-paying job that kept our family comfortable. While my mother stayed at home and took care of my siblings and me. Unfortunately, due to extreme levels of stress (both professional and personal kinds) my father became deathly sick and had to quit his job. My mother cared for the family but did not know how to manage finances. After that, a crisis ensued, and we went from well-off to homeless in a matter of two years. Throughout the years, there were still many financial highs and lows. I was never comfortable in the highs, because we would soon be low. Therefore, I concluded that I would never allow myself to be financially unstable. Due to my past, money, or the lack thereof, is terrifying. I planned my life according to what would make me more money rather than what would make me happy. Security was far more enticing than happiness; happiness would not get me a house and car. The hardest about accepting this plan was my parents. Despite our situation, my parents always encouraged me to follow my dreams. If I wanted to be a writer, singer, or doctor, they were going to find a way to support me. This broke my heart because I couldn't tell them the reason I wouldn't is because I didn't want to end up like them. I never wanted my children to feel the uncertainty I did. These thoughts kept me up at night when I was as young as 10. It wasn't until I got older that I realized throughout these struggles, my parents never stopped investing. They paid what they could (responsibly) but they also found a way to get me vocal lessons, to invest in their dreams, and the ones of my brothers. They had never stopped dreaming, while I didn't allow myself the thought. They used money as a servant, while money had become the master of my life. So, I took a chance on myself. I was only afraid of what I did not know, so I started learning how finance works. I'm taking a personal financial literacy class. It teaches from what a dollar is worth to filing taxes, managing my accounts, and even how mortgages work. I made a plan with my brother to get the best credit possible. And, I'm applying for scholarships to save money for college, to pursue my real dreams. I am still naive, and nowhere near a financial expert. But, every time I have a question, I look for an answer. When there's a problem, I find a solution. The same goes for my finances. I'm well aware that I will more than likely go through financial struggles. However, I also know that by learning from my parent's experience and my research, I will be okay. It will all be worth it.

The first person to ever tell me I could be great was a Venezuelan woman in her early forties, in a tiny room after my first audition ever. Her name is Monica Rodriguez and I sincerely think that she changed the course of my life forever. I was a little girl, just turned twelve and I had(still have) the dream of being a musician. However, lessons were expensive, and I was left to my own devices to learn how to sing, something I had been praised for my whole life. My parents knew this, and we had the money, surprised me on Christmas Eve, that I would start taking lessons with a teacher, but first I had to audition. I was anxious, the good and bad kind, but it was a step in the right direction. The most embarrassing part was that I was completely unprepared. I arrived at the audition with the song, "Fix a Heart," difficult for my level, barely practiced with karaoke, because I thought I would do acapella for some reason. Still, I did it, with tears in my eyes, thinking I'd be rejected. And, then she asked If I had ever taken lessons before and I said no. Monica said, with the biggest smile, that I had once in a generation voice, and she was so happy that she'd get to be my first teacher. The best way I can describe Monica is as a force of nature. The next two years,she would be a teacher, mentor, and therapist. Music gets you to the most vulnerable parts of yourself, during these one-hour lessons, they'd show a lot. I had so many insecurities and doubts about myself and my future, that would come during these one-hour lessons. Monica talked me through every single one, and I would be revived. She helped me grieve when an old family friend died. And, when a song or a note, or a riff was too hard for me, Monica would find a way to teach me. When her lessons raised from thirty-five per hour to eighty, and I couldn't afford it? She kept the price the same for me. She made me a better singer, but she also made me a better human being. Those doubts and insecurities always made me see music as a hobby, even when I knew, it wasn't in my heart. Monica, ever patient and ever kind, told me that I could do as I please, but she knew that I'd end up somewhere in music, that it was my destiny. I didn't pay much attention but her words rang true, even after I stopped taking lessons with her. It was sad; but due to the pandemic and financial issues, we lost connection and I could no longer afford lessons. She was right, of course. I'm learning guitar and piano, and majoring in Music Technology after graduation. I love Monica, I always will, she pushed me in a way that I had never pushed. My future wherever it leads in music, is thanks to her.

My favorite thing about Disney is how it taught me what hope is in the most traumitizing PG way possible. These films are made for children but there is no lack of mature themes in Disney movies, one that I overlooked when I was younger. Now, I know they're based on stories from Shakespeare or the Grimm Brothers, and that's where they get their darker origins. However, I didn't know that one day; I would relate to characters like a lion, a demi-god, and a lost princess. These stories would get me through the hardest times in my life. The Lion King, a masterpiece; one of the greatest movies of all time, targeted towards children; has a son watching his dad die in front of him. While my dad thankfully isn't dead, I saw him lose full mobility of his legs over a week and rushed to the emergency room. Tumors touching his spine cord and they would soon touch his lungs. I wasn't as young as Simba; I was twelve. But, suddenly, reality hit; I had to grow up. With my mom in the hospital taking care of my dad; it was me and my two older brothers. They served something like Timon and Pumba roles. And, I was trying my best to Hakuna Matata my way through everything. Thankfully, my father healed and he's currently in remission. Still, I needed to face my challenges, like the future. I was stuck being psychology, something I liked, that was stable. Or music, the original love of my life, something that Disney helped grow as I sang their songs over the years. And, one day, after class, I decided to rewatch Hercules and sobbed. The song "Go the Distance," touched me, it was about someone who knew they were meant more than settling, knew the odds against them, and decided to face the world anyway. Something I didn't dare to do, yet. With time, I reached the same conclusion as Hercules, I can go the distance, but I need to take the first step. Then, I sprained my ankle before I could even take the first step as the pandemic hit. I was online from 8th grade to my sophomore year of high school. Every day inside, the same routine, with no one to talk to, and wanting to do so much, I was going crazy. Naturally, I did a parody of "When Will My Life Begin," from Tangled. Waiting for my chance, for my situation to be over, for freedom like Rapunzel was something that marked me for life. Like her, though, any new experience was marvelous as it was terrifying. And like her, I was free eventually and went to my current high school, which changed my life. My favorite thing about Disney is how they unknowingly prepared me for what was to come and taught me how to hope. Kid movies are misunderstood if I say so myself. They're for "kids" so, it's not "serious". But, the difference between how a Disney movie and an adult film deals with its trauma, is that Disney dares to always find happiness at the end. I love Disney for allowing me to hope through the struggles like its characters did, and to me? I owe it my life.