The lyrics from Olivia Rodrigo's song the grudge that resonate with me are, "It takes strength to forgive, but I'm not quite sure I'm there yet." I connect with these lyrics because I believe that personal growth is not always a straightforward process. Sometimes we experience situations that challenge our confidence, our sense of belonging, and the way we perceive ourselves. Even when we move forward, those experiences can continue to influence the decisions we make and the people we become. When I began my teaching career, I struggled with asking for help because I worried that others would perceive me as incompetent. As a new special education teacher, I was learning how to navigate the responsibilities of the profession while also trying to establish confidence in my abilities. My early experiences with mentorship did not always provide the supportive environment I needed. Looking back, I recognize how those experiences influenced my willingness to be vulnerable and ask questions. Rodrigo's lyrics remind me that acknowledging the impact of a difficult experience does not mean allowing it to define my future. I have learned that I can recognize the ways an experience affected me while also making intentional decisions about what I want to do differently. I do not believe that growth requires us to forget the challenges we experienced. Instead, I believe those experiences can provide opportunities for reflection and change. Today, I am pursuing a Ph.D. in Innovation in Curriculum and Instruction, and my research interests center on mentorship for early-career special education teachers. I hope to develop an online platform that connects new teachers with experienced educators outside their immediate school communities. My goal is to create opportunities for teachers to ask questions, receive guidance, and develop confidence without fearing that their challenges will negatively influence how others perceive their competence. One of my personal triumphs has been recognizing that I can use experiences that once made me question my abilities to inform work that may support others. Pursuing doctoral studies while continuing to teach has also challenged me to become more comfortable with uncertainty, recognize my limitations, and remain open to learning. For me, Rodrigo's lyrics represent the complexity of personal growth. I may not always have complete closure regarding difficult experiences, but I can decide how I respond to them. My journey has taught me that resilience does not mean pretending challenges did not exist. It means acknowledging their impact and finding ways to move forward with purpose. Ultimately, I hope my experiences will allow me to contribute to a profession where educators feel supported, valued, and comfortable learning from one another.

One thing I hope to build is an online mentorship platform that connects early-career teachers with experienced educators outside of their immediate school communities. As a special education teacher and doctoral student studying innovation in curriculum and instruction, I have become increasingly interested in how mentorship can influence teachers' professional confidence, sense of belonging, and decisions to remain in education. My interest in building this platform comes from my own experiences as a new teacher. During my first year, I often hesitated to ask questions because I worried that admitting I did not know something would cause others to question my competence. Teaching is personal, and the way educators perceive their professional abilities can influence their willingness to seek support. Looking back, I recognize that I would have benefited from having access to an experienced educator who was not directly connected to my school or responsible for evaluating my performance. I envision creating a platform where new teachers can connect with tenured educators who understand their specific teaching assignments and professional challenges. For example, an early-career special education teacher could receive guidance from an experienced special educator who understands individualized education programs, classroom management, and the responsibilities associated with supporting students with disabilities. Mentors would provide guidance, share resources, and help teachers reflect on challenges without making them feel that asking for assistance is a professional weakness. An important feature of this platform would be its emphasis on confidentiality, accessibility, and non-evaluative relationships. I want teachers to feel comfortable asking questions they might otherwise avoid discussing within their school communities. I also hope to create opportunities for experienced educators to share their knowledge while receiving compensation for their time and expertise. In this way, the platform would recognize that mentorship should be reciprocal and that experienced teachers have valuable professional knowledge to contribute. My long-term goal is to develop and research this model to better understand what teachers need from mentorship relationships and whether this approach can strengthen their professional experiences. I recognize that building an effective platform will require listening to educators, examining existing research, and remaining open to feedback from the communities it is intended to serve. Ultimately, I hope to build something that extends beyond an online resource. I want to contribute to a professional community where educators feel supported rather than isolated. When teachers have access to meaningful guidance, they may be better positioned to remain in the profession, strengthen their instructional practices, and support the students and families they serve. For me, building this platform is an opportunity to connect my personal experiences, professional responsibilities, and doctoral research to a larger commitment to improving educational experiences for both teachers and students.

I believe that teaching requires educators to recognize that students come into the classroom with different experiences, interests, and learning needs. As a special education teacher, I have learned that creativity is not simply about making lessons engaging, but about finding ways to make learning accessible and meaningful to students. I believe that when educators take the time to understand students as individuals, they can create learning experiences that encourage curiosity, confidence, and a genuine interest in learning. One experience that continues to shape my approach to teaching involves a student I taught in kindergarten in a 12:1:1 special education classroom. This student had a love for learning, but also had individual learning needs that required me to think creatively about instruction. One of the things I noticed early on was their interest in drawing and art. Rather than treating this interest as something separate from academics, I began incorporating it into our lessons. For example, when we worked on sequencing events in stories, I used storyboards that allowed the student to draw what happened in the beginning, middle, and end. This provided an opportunity for the student to demonstrate their understanding of a story without relying exclusively on written responses. I also incorporated multisensory approaches that allowed the student to engage with content in different ways. These instructional decisions were intentional because I wanted to maintain academic expectations while providing opportunities for the student to learn through their strengths and interests. This student is now in fourth grade and attends a gifted and talented class. They self-identify as an artist and recently shared that they want to become an illustrator when they grow up. I recognize that their academic journey is the result of their own efforts and the support of many educators. However, their experience reminds me of the importance of not allowing a student's current educational placement or learning needs to determine our expectations of what they are capable of achieving. Recently, during a school assembly, this same student expressed that they cared about me. This was particularly meaningful because it reminded me that teaching is relational. While I value academic growth, I also believe that students need to feel seen, respected, and supported in order to develop the confidence to take risks in their learning. Moving forward, I want to continue designing learning experiences that provide students with opportunities to explore their interests while developing academic skills. I plan to incorporate student choice, inquiry-based learning, multisensory instruction, and opportunities for students to demonstrate their understanding in different ways. I also want students to see their identities and experiences reflected in the curriculum, rather than feeling that they must separate who they are from how they learn. Ultimately, I believe that creative teaching requires us to examine our assumptions about students and remain open to different ways of approaching instruction. My goal is to create a learning environment where students feel that their ideas are valued, their needs are understood, and their potential is not limited by how they are initially perceived. I want students to leave my classroom not only having developed academic skills, but also feeling excited about what they are capable of learning and becoming.

Joy is Different A 32-Page Children’s Picture Book Manuscript [Page 1] Joy loved getting dressed. It was her favorite part of the entire day because clothing was her playground. [Page 2] Every morning, she mixed and matched colors, textures, and seasons. When she looked in the mirror, she saw something that felt like pure joy—something beautifully different. [Page 3] One Monday, her mom called up the stairs, "Come down, Joy! It’s time to go!" Joy bounced down the steps like a tornado of patterns: shorts over tights, plaid mixed with paisley. "Amazing," Joy whispered to herself. [Page 4] "Are you ready for school?" her mom asked. Joy nodded proudly. She wore her lucky tutu and her favorite sparkly jelly shoes. It was her first day of kindergarten, and she couldn’t wait to make the biggest, brightest impression. [Page 5] As her mom dropped her off, she shared a piece of wisdom: "Be a leader, not a follower, Joy. Do the things that make you happy." That was exactly what Joy intended to do. [Page 6] But when Joy walked into the classroom, her eyes went wide. She saw only gray, black, white, and dark blue. No fun colors. No wild textures. Everything looked completely monochrome. [Page 7] Some kids pointed and laughed. Others whispered as she walked past. Joy felt her sparkles dulling. Her color faded, and her happiness drifted away. For the first time in her life, Joy realized she was different—and it hurt. [Page 8] The next day, Joy decided to try a new experiment. She tried her best to look like everyone else. [Page 9] She pulled on a plain gray shirt, standard jeans, and gray sneakers. Looking in the mirror, she felt none of her usual excitement, but she thought this was the price of fitting in. [Page 10] At school, Joy waited. She waited for someone to notice that she was just like them now. But in her gray outfit, she simply vanished into the background. There was nothing colorful or special left. [Page 11] When Joy got home, she marched straight to her room. She looked at her vibrant closet and remembered her mother's words. I am a leader, Joy thought. I am different, and I have to do what makes me happy. [Page 12] The next morning, Joy came downstairs in the most colorful, sparkly, fluffiest outfit she could imagine. Her heart sang. She was different, and she was Joy. [Page 13] She walked through the school doors ready for the whispers, ready for the stares, and completely ready to be herself. [Page 14] To her surprise, when she entered the classroom, she spotted new pops of color. Bianca wore bright pink boots, and Rome wore a rainbow hat. [Page 15] Bianca gave a tiny wave and pointed to her boots. Rome flashed a big grin, tipping his hat. Joy wasn't the only one who loved color after all. [Page 16] During circle time, Bianca leaned over. "I wore these because I saw your sparkly shoes on Monday," she whispered. "I was too scared to wear them before." [Page 17] Joy’s heart did a little twirl. Being herself hadn't just made her feel brave—it gave her classmates permission to shine, too. [Page 18] By Friday, the classroom was transformed. It became a buzzing canvas of stripes, polka dots, mismatched socks, and bright yellow capes. [Page 19] The playground turned into a celebration of pure imagination. [Page 20] Joy wore dinosaur wings over a neon floral tutu. She moved through the day like a joyful hurricane of self-expression. [Page 21] Some children still preferred simple gray and blue, and Joy smiled warmly at them too. Being yourself meant letting everyone choose their own rhythm. [Page 22] When it was time for art, the teacher laid out giant sheets of paper for self-portraits. [Page 23] Joy grabbed magenta, turquoise, gold, and lime crayons, letting her hands dance across the page. [Page 24] "Is that really what you look like inside?" a classmate asked, staring at the explosion of shapes. [Page 25] "It’s how I feel," Joy said proudly. "Big, bright, and completely me." [Page 26] When the final bell rang, Joy bounded out the front doors to meet her mom. [Page 27] "How was school today, my leader?" her mom asked with a warm hug. [Page 28] Joy twirled, her jelly shoes catching the sunlight. [Page 29] "I didn't fit in, Mom," Joy beamed. "I stood out! And I helped my friends find their sparkles, too." [Page 30] Her mom squeezed her tight. "That’s the magic, Joy. When you don't shrink yourself, you give the whole world room to bloom." [Page 31] Joy looked down at her wild, patterned, wonderful outfit. [Page 32] She was different. She was free. She was pure Joy.Storytelling and the Power of Unfettered Expression The core message of Joy is Different focuses on creative resilience and authentic self-expression. Early childhood is often the first moment children encounter social pressures toward conformity. Entering school requires navigating peer judgment, gender norms, and implicit dress codes that encourage blending in. I chose to highlight Joy’s journey of non-conformity—touching on themes of queer joy, fashion as identity, and emotional autonomy—to show young readers that shrinking oneself to fit someone else’s comfort zone is a sacrifice of one's personal magic. Joy’s brief attempt to wear gray demonstrates that "fitting in" often leads to invisibility, whereas standing firmly in one's uniqueness creates space for true belonging. Storytelling serves as both a mirror and a window for developing minds. As a mirror, Joy’s story validates children who feel different, expressive, or outside the mainstream, reinforcing that their individuality is a strength rather than a flaw. As a window, the narrative allows conformist or hesitant children to witness the beauty of self-expression, fostering empathy and reducing the impulse to judge peers who present differently. Using color and texture as visual metaphors translates complex emotional themes—like anxiety, peer pressure, and self-confidence—into concrete concepts that young children can easily grasp. When Joy's clothing dulls to gray, children visually understand emotional withdrawal; when the classroom fills with color, they visually experience community transformation. By showing that Joy’s bravery gives her peers permission to wear their own "pops of color," the story demonstrates leadership in its purest form: inspiring others simply by daring to exist authentically. Storytelling equips young audiences with the language, empathy, and courage needed to navigate their own worlds without dimming their light.

The first time I watched a student realize, “Wait, I can read this,” I understood why special education became more than my profession. It became part of my purpose. To me, Harold Bloom’s statement means that teaching is not only about giving students information. Teaching is about helping students recognize themselves as capable, valuable, and present in the world. When Bloom says that the purpose of teaching is to bring a student to a sense of their own presence, I believe he means that education should help a student understand, I am here. I matter. I can learn. I have a voice. This belief is the reason I am passionate about special education. Many students with disabilities move through school being reminded of what is difficult for them. They may know their reading level, their testing accommodations, their service minutes, or the skills they have not mastered yet. While these supports are important, they should never become the whole story of who a child is. Special education should not make students feel smaller. When done with care, it should help students feel seen, supported, and powerful. As a special education teacher, I have worked with students who were afraid to read aloud, hesitant to write, or quick to say, “I don’t know,” before they even tried. I have seen students shut down because they were used to feeling behind. I have also seen what happens when instruction is patient, explicit, and rooted in belief. A student sounds out a word they used to skip. A student writes one sentence and then proudly adds another. A student solves a math problem step by step and looks surprised because they did it independently. These moments may seem small, but they are life-changing for a child who is learning to trust themselves. Equity is central to why I do this work. To me, equity means making sure students receive what they need in order to access learning with dignity. It means recognizing that not every child learns the same way, communicates the same way, or shows understanding in the same way. It also means refusing to lower expectations simply because a student has a disability. My mission is to create learning spaces where students with disabilities have access to strong instruction, meaningful support, and opportunities to see themselves as thinkers, readers, writers, problem-solvers, and leaders. Technology is also an important part of my mission. I believe technology, when used thoughtfully and ethically, can help remove barriers for students and teachers. Tools such as text-to-speech, speech-to-text, visual supports, adaptive programs, and AI-supported planning can help make learning more accessible. Technology should never replace the relationship between a teacher and student, but it can help teachers differentiate instruction, reduce workload, and create more responsive supports. I am especially interested in how ethical technology and AI can support new special education teachers so they feel more prepared, less overwhelmed, and better able to serve their students. This interest connects directly to my doctoral work. I am interested in special education teacher preparation, teacher attrition, workload demands, and how technology can support educators entering the field. I believe that if we want students with disabilities to feel fully seen, we must also prepare and support the teachers who serve them. Special education teachers carry instructional, legal, emotional, and administrative responsibilities. When teachers are not prepared for those realities, both teachers and students are affected. My goal is to contribute to research and practical solutions that strengthen teacher preparation, improve retention, and advance equity for students with disabilities. If I imagined my mission as a fairy tale, I would be a teacher walking into a classroom that others had mistaken for a locked tower. Inside were students who had been told in quiet and loud ways that learning was not really for them. I would not arrive with magic. I would arrive with patience, structure, books, visuals, decodable texts, sentence starters, technology tools, encouragement, and belief. Little by little, the students would discover that the tower had never truly been locked. The door opened each time a child said, “I can try,” “I understand,” or “I have something to say.” That is why I am passionate about special education. It is not only about helping students access lessons. It is about helping them access confidence, voice, independence, and belonging. My goal is to guide students toward the moment when they understand that their presence matters in the classroom, in their communities, and in the world.