My name is Christine Tominiko and I am an independent Samoan woman pursuing a higher education. As a Samoan, I feel that pacific islanders are highly underrepresented in STEM majors and especially as a woman I feel I must represent those within this field by going as far as I can with my educational journey. Over the years several Pacific islands in the Pacific have been victim to sea level rise, coral reef loss, native species extinction, and increased storm frequency. I want to become a well-trained scientist who will help the community with conservation without interfering with the cultures of indigenous people. My first real experience of learning to care for the land came from trade high school where my trade was agriculture. We learned how to sow seeds and to propagate the land and it was within this time I learned the importance that we as people have on the land. I loved the feeling of watching something that I put into the ground grow and prosper. That inspired me to pursue Agriculture for my associates, but I also wanted to explore the animal side of agriculture and am now pursuing Animal Health and Management for my bachelor's. Still, I knew that I would pursue my masters in a program that involves conservation. That is why I am currently enrolled in Tropical Conservation Biology and Environmental Science graduate program. In my past undergraduate years, I have always participated in summer internships. These internships ranged from observational to research and research internships were my favorite since I had the chance to learn and apply the scientific method. One internship was held this past Summer of 2022 and was memorable because it was structured differently from the rest. This internship stood out from the rest was how it incorporated the Hawaiian community and the Hawaiian culture within the program This internship was funded by the National Science Foundation, and it was a research experience for undergraduates that focused on Environmental Biology for Pacific IslandersMy long-term goal is to be in an occupation where I contribute my services to conserving natural native resources and animals somewhere in the Pacific. This graduate program Tropical Conservation Biology and Environmental Science (TCBES) purpose is to provide graduate training in conservation biology and environmental science to those with baccalaureate degrees. This is my main goal to be well educated and trained so that I can apply my skills as a Pacific Islander back into my community, “O le ala i le pule o le tautua” The path to leadership is service. With saying all of those I should receive this scholarship because it is obvious I would contribute to my journey and I certainly have shown I have a passion for representing Pacific Islanders, especially my Samoan people in the field of science. Not a lot of people have families that can support their childrens education and this accounts and I am one of those so it would help if I was awarded this scholarship.

I don't remember a day when I wasn't a Christian and being one of course I attended church various times. Growing up I was used to praying day and night to Jesus to help me get straight As in school or help me to become a valedictorian. Of course, I trusted him and my prayers were answered. Few years after high school I lost connection to Jesus and I noticed that my prayers have become empty and repetitive and I was just saying a prayer just to say I prayed. What I realized was that I was selfish in my prayers and I was only asking more than thanking him and praising his name for all the blessings that I received. Yes, I can pray for my wants but what do I give back to Jesus in return, nothing. As I realized that I cried to myself that Jesus gave his life on the cross for our sins to be forgiven and yet we never give him enough praise or love for he is the reason why we are alive and still have a chance to go to the kingdom of heaven. I have always believed in Jesus but being a Christian is not easy there are so many things that we shouldn't do because it is sinful in His eyes. Yet even with all those, we are continually blessed with his grace and I have started to trust in Him again for I once went astray. I noticed, looking back now when I went astray everything went so wrong in my life. I fell into a deep depression that no matter what I did could never climb out of. The next thing I know is I stopped going to church and looked for excuses not to go and so I didn't. After depression was self-hate and I hated everything about myself that I was at a point suicidal. I kept comparing myself to other people and found flaws in myself and I hated it. These thoughts filled my head and whispered I wasn't good enough and people don't love me because of it. There were sudden moments when tears would run down my face because that's how strong the voices in my head and it made me feel worthless. During this time I tried to distract myself with other things to not think or fall into a state of deep depression and one of those things was scrolling through tik tok. It's incredible how the Lord speaks to us in various forms. I was watching this certain tik tok and it said "Why should we be sad when we were created wonderfully and fearfully made in the image of God". That right then opened my eyes to question myself as to why am I sad. I might think I am ugly and unworthy but Jesus says I am beautiful and I am worthy. Jesus rescued me and saved me from performing an unforgivable act. I as a Christian forgot that my life is not my own and it belongs to God. He gave us this life and it would be disrespectful to get rid of it. Jesus talked to me and said I am worthy and it's ok if I am not perfect for he is and he can make up for our flaws. He saved my life and changed it for the better because not only do I go to church but I pray every night and day to not only give thanks, praise, repent but also pray for the things we want in life. Prayers don't just come true right away but you have to trust His process and His timing, have faith and everything you prayed for will come in God's timing. That's because the best timing is God's. Amen.

Growing up in the islands it wasn't easy to grasp the feeling of wanting to go to school. Most adults around me had jobs and they didn't even go to college. That's why I thought it doesn't matter whether I further my education or not. That mindset lingered in my mind for the first three years of high school until I hit my senior year. It's funny how life makes you think of 'What ifs' or 'I wanna be...' ,but the only way to make those thoughts a reality I have to pursue a higher education in a field that I love. In my Samoan culture we have strict but loving parents and they want us to do well in school but they have an odd way of saying it and me being the first of my immediate family, I felt the burden of having to be the first in my family to graduate from college. Two years later, although a community college I graduated with my Associates and I am pursuing my Bachelors but before the success was a road of struggles that I had to go through to get to the present. The journey to where I am now is not without obstacles and trials. It was a battle because I was the first and I think every first had to learn everything so they can help the next in line. With no help I struggled mentally and physically trying to keep up expectations and standards put upon me, being the first generation in college. It felt as the whole world has put its weight on me and I was put on supervision 24/7. My community, church and family have their hopes high for me to be something, something great. High school was rough since I was not exactly the popular type but I still managed to have great friends. I limited my time and plans for hanging out with my friends just to focus on my studies because I had the fear of being a failure and that would make my family sad and disappointed. My family means everything to me so of course their thoughts have a great impact on the decisions and the emotions that I go through. Ending high school as a valedictorian, I thought would feel like a great victory but the feeling didn't last as I realized, what is the point of being a valedictorian. Good grades don't automatically prove you're smart. Then it came that I gave it my all the good grades that I got showed that I worked hard and I strived for the best. I may not be the smartest student but I am a hard working and I strive to be the best in whatever I do. My mind and my body were tools enslaved to do school work and becoming a college student I had to level up because the standards were raised as I was not in high school anymore. I had to invest more of my abilities and enhance it to meet the college standards. To study for tests I had to lose sleep because I felt that if I didn't study all night I might get a mistake on the test and if I failed (which I have) I would get angry and think 'I'm not smart enough', 'why am I so stupid'. Questions that mentally abused me filled my head and I fall into a state of depression that takes me a while to get out of. Mental depression comes with physical fatigue, where you just feel tire of everything and want to quit and drop out because it would be so much easier. Of course I didn't give up as I am writing this essay to apply for a scholarship that I so need because financial aid just does not cut it. I found my motivation of being in school, my family especially my younger sibling. 'Family is everything' is an overused phrase because it's true without family I would have given up. I am the oldest of my siblings and they look to me as an example and I want to be a great and positive example. An example that shows them that it does not matter where you come from or how smart you are but what matters is perseverance and having a good healthy mind and body to help you strive for your goals. I may have had mental and physical abuse throughout my education but that comes with the battle. I know it's hard to push yourself in the academic environment but you have to do the hard things in life so that you will live an easy life later on. We want to get things in life but that will not happen unless you give, you can not just be on the receiving end. You have to give your all, your mind and body you have to give it to your goals. Put in the work that is needed to reach them. Only then will you feel the outmost achievement at the end of all of it. The feeling of being mentally and physically tired will not matter once you get that degree that you so wanted and I hope to feel that a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. I want to make my family proud of me and of course my self. So again, sacrificing your mind and body to something that will feel so rewarding in the end will so be worth it. The struggles is not something I try to hide and stray from but something I want to tackle and so I would get stronger in the end.