In the past few years, I have had major struggles with depression, anxiety, and mental abuse from a partner. All three of these have pushed me deep into a hole where I thought there was no light. It left me gasping for air under crushing pressure. I haven't been able to seek help for these issues although that can be bad. It has led me to be an independent, strong young woman.
Having these mental health issues has led me to believe in a lot of things about the world, as well as myself. When I first started struggling, I believed everything in the world was dark and I was alone in it- often, my teachers would ask if I was okay, which is how plain my stress was. I avoided friends and family, opting for solitude. I thought that they weren't interested in me anyway. I avoided many club activities because I was scared of being around people, and even more scared of failing at them. Once I started managing it better, though, I learned that I was able to handle it.
Attempting to manage these issues on my own affected many of my relationships. It made ties between my immediate family stretch- we didn't see eye to eye on many things and it caused some problems. Despite that, family is family and when I needed something, they were there for me. That is the reason I manage it so much better today. As for friendships, I never had many in general. I was the quiet kid in the back of the classroom with my nose in a book, swallowed up in a magical fantasy realm that was much more bright and colorful than the dull world I saw before me. That changed, though. In my last year of middle school, I met a girl who never stopped laughing at something and always had a smile (if she had her coffee, that is). She was the complete opposite of me- where I was dark and annoyed, she was bright and bubbly. she is also one of the reasons I manage things so well. She has offered me a space to talk about how I feel and she has always accepted me as I am. Even though I have those strong, helpful relationships in my life, I did also have more negative interactions that may have set e back in my progress. I was involved in a relationship with a guy who can be considered a narcissistic abuser- he made me mistrust every step I took and every word I take. He pushed things on me and made threats after he broke up with me, and that caused a serious spike in my mental health.
As for a career path, I gravitated toward psychology because of my own personal struggles. The aspects of the mind, how it works, and how it affects people have always been a fascination of mine. Initially, I thought I would go towards therapy, but I was introduced to the forensic aspect and I fell in love with it. Seeing mental disorders such as DID, schizophrenia, and psychosis intrigued me, and learning and working in this field would be one of the most exciting things of my life.