I can confidently say that the lowest point in my life was between September and October of 2020. I've never thought of myself as having been a popular person at my school, or within any aspect of my socialization with others. I feel as if my friends only seem to care for me when they can find the time to remember that I exist. Like many individuals my age, I was completely isolated during the initial period of quarantine. In many instances I would ask every single person that I knew if they would like to go do something, anything, so that we could escape from our virtual lives. Unfortunately, I was often met with excuses, disregard, last minute cancellations or the all too common white lie to avoid social activities. While I understand that safety is imperative in the age of Covid-19, even safe socializing seemed aberrant. During that period of isolation from the world, I started to degrade mentally. Being surrounded by death, I was constantly reminded of my own deep seeded fears regarding mortality. One notable experience that really challenged my perspective on mortality was after I finished NBC’s “The Good Place.” In essence, the show provides its viewers with the thought provoking question: “what is the purpose of living a morally sound life?” We as humans are supposed to spend our whole lives doing the correct things to end up in the best possible place after death, but what's the point if we are just trapped and there is no more struggle left? All these ideas wore at me, and I started to “fall down the rabbit hole” within my mind. The most disturbing thing that started to affect me was the fact that my thought processes were being impeded and consumed by the idea of my eventual death every single second of every day. I felt dehumanized. That was the first time I really contemplated suicide. I thought, “what's the point of playing out this game if it's going to end anyway?” But then I had a couple simple experiences that changed my views for the better. I started reaching out to musicians that truly inspired me with their art. I candidly sent emails to Chuck Salamone and Chris Ballew, composer of the computer game Hylics 2 and lead man of the alternative rock group The Presidents of the United States of America respectively. I received great information from them both and later became Chuck Salamone’s student. The process of talking to these great musicians inspired me to take on my own artistic endeavor, my album “Aberration.” Putting my emotions into sound was the cure. I created a world where the beauty of the Ocean could be contemplated and experienced aurally. I created life within sound, and a story that the listener can become a part of. When I completed the project I had found that my calling is music. When I return to my music with the intent to analyze, I am captivated. Perhaps I subconsciously structured my narrative after the thoughts I was having within my period of depression? In conclusion, I realized what I needed was within me from the start. I needed to unearth a passion that was dormant. In the future I want to create more art, whether it be musical or visual. Having received mentorship from Chuck and Chris, I intend to become an influential individual for young artists that may be experiencing a similar war within.

I can confidently say that the lowest point in my life was between September and October of 2020. I've never thought of myself as having been a popular person at my school, or within any aspect of my socialization with others. I feel as if my friends only seem to care for me when they can find the time to remember that I exist. Like many individuals my age, I was completely isolated during the initial period of quarantine. In many instances I would ask every single person that I knew if they would like to go do something, anything, so that we could escape from our virtual lives. Unfortunately, I was often met with excuses, disregard, last minute cancellations or the all too common white lie to avoid social activities. While I understand that safety is imperative in the age of Covid-19, even safe socializing seemed aberrant. During that period of isolation from the world, I started to degrade mentally. Being surrounded by death, I was constantly reminded of my own deep seeded fears regarding mortality. One notable experience that really challenged my perspective on mortality was after I finished NBC’s “The Good Place.” In essence, the show provides its viewers with the thought provoking question: “what is the purpose of living a morally sound life?” We as humans are supposed to spend our whole lives doing the correct things to end up in the best possible place after death, but what's the point if we are just trapped and there is no more struggle left? All these ideas wore at me, and I started to “fall down the rabbit hole” within my mind. The most disturbing thing that started to affect me was the fact that my thought processes were being impeded and consumed by the idea of my eventual death every single second of every day. I felt dehumanized. That was the first time I really contemplated suicide. I thought, “what's the point of playing out this game if it's going to end anyway?” But then I had a couple simple experiences that changed my views for the better. I started reaching out to musicians that truly inspired me with their art. I candidly sent emails to Chuck Salamone and Chris Ballew, composer of the computer game Hylics 2 and lead man of the alternative rock group The Presidents of the United States of America respectively. I received great information from them both and later became Chuck Salamone’s student. The process of talking to these great musicians inspired me to take on my own artistic endeavor, my album “Aberration.” Putting my emotions into sound was the cure. I created a world where the beauty of the Ocean could be contemplated and experienced aurally. I created life within sound, and a story that the listener can become a part of. When I completed the project I had found that my calling is music. When I return to my music with the intent to analyze, I am captivated. Perhaps I subconsciously structured my narrative after the thoughts I was having within my period of depression? In conclusion, I realized what I needed was within me from the start. I needed to unearth a passion that was dormant. In the future I want to create more art, whether it be musical or visual. Having received mentorship from Chuck and Chris, I intend to become an influential individual for young artists that may be experiencing a similar war within.

I can confidently say that the lowest point in my life was between September and October of 2020. I've never thought of myself as having been a popular person at my school, or within any aspect of my socialization with others. I feel as if my friends only seem to care for me when they can find the time to remember that I exist. Like many individuals my age, I was completely isolated during the initial period of quarantine. In many instances I would ask every single person that I knew if they would like to go do something, anything, so that we could escape from our virtual lives. Unfortunately, I was often met with excuses, disregard, last minute cancellations or the all too common white lie to avoid social activities. While I understand that safety is imperative in the age of Covid-19, even safe socializing seemed aberrant. During that period of isolation from the world, I started to degrade mentally. Being surrounded by death, I was constantly reminded of my own deep seeded fears regarding mortality. One notable experience that really challenged my perspective on mortality was after I finished NBC’s “The Good Place.” In essence, the show provides its viewers with the thought provoking question: “what is the purpose of living a morally sound life?” We as humans are supposed to spend our whole lives doing the correct things to end up in the best possible place after death, but what's the point if we are just trapped and there is no more struggle left? All these ideas wore at me, and I started to “fall down the rabbit hole” within my mind. The most disturbing thing that started to affect me was the fact that my thought processes were being impeded and consumed by the idea of my eventual death every single second of every day. I felt dehumanized. That was the first time I really contemplated suicide. I thought, “what's the point of playing out this game if it's going to end anyway?” But then I had a couple simple experiences that changed my views for the better. I started reaching out to musicians that truly inspired me with their art. I candidly sent emails to Chuck Salamone and Chris Ballew, composer of the computer game Hylics 2 and lead man of the alternative rock group The Presidents of the United States of America respectively. I received great information from them both and later became Chuck Salamone’s student. The process of talking to these great musicians inspired me to take on my own artistic endeavor, my album “Aberration.” Putting my emotions into sound was the cure. I created a world where the beauty of the Ocean could be contemplated and experienced aurally. I created life within sound, and a story that the listener can become a part of. When I completed the project I had found that my calling is music. When I return to my music with the intent to analyze, I am captivated. Perhaps I subconsciously structured my narrative after the thoughts I was having within my period of depression? In conclusion, I realized what I needed was within me from the start. I needed to unearth a passion that was dormant. In the future I want to create more art, whether it be musical or visual. Having received mentorship from Chuck and Chris, I intend to become an influential individual for young artists that may be experiencing a similar war within.

I can confidently say that the lowest point in my life was between September and October of 2020. I've never thought of myself as having been a popular person at my school, or within any aspect of my socialization with others. I feel as if my friends only seem to care for me when they can find the time to remember that I exist. Like many individuals my age, I was completely isolated during the initial period of quarantine. In many instances I would ask every single person that I knew if they would like to go do something, anything, so that we could escape from our virtual lives. Unfortunately, I was often met with excuses, disregard, last minute cancellations or the all too common white lie to avoid social activities. While I understand that safety is imperative in the age of Covid-19, even safe socializing seemed aberrant. During that period of isolation from the world, I started to degrade mentally. Being surrounded by death, I was constantly reminded of my own deep seeded fears regarding mortality. One notable experience that really challenged my perspective on mortality was after I finished NBC’s “The Good Place.” In essence, the show provides its viewers with the thought provoking question: “what is the purpose of living a morally sound life?” We as humans are supposed to spend our whole lives doing the correct things to end up in the best possible place after death, but what's the point if we are just trapped and there is no more struggle left? All these ideas wore at me, and I started to “fall down the rabbit hole” within my mind. The most disturbing thing that started to affect me was the fact that my thought processes were being impeded and consumed by the idea of my eventual death every single second of every day. I felt dehumanized. That was the first time I really contemplated suicide. I thought, “what's the point of playing out this game if it's going to end anyway?” But then I had a couple simple experiences that changed my views for the better. I started reaching out to musicians that truly inspired me with their art. I candidly sent emails to Chuck Salamone and Chris Ballew, composer of the computer game Hylics 2 and lead man of the alternative rock group The Presidents of the United States of America respectively. I received great information from them both and later became Chuck Salamone’s student. The process of talking to these great musicians inspired me to take on my own artistic endeavor, my album “Aberration.” Putting my emotions into sound was the cure. I created a world where the beauty of the Ocean could be contemplated and experienced aurally. I created life within sound, and a story that the listener can become a part of. When I completed the project I had found that my calling is music. When I return to my music with the intent to analyze, I am captivated. Perhaps I subconsciously structured my narrative after the thoughts I was having within my period of depression? In conclusion, I realized what I needed was within me from the start. I needed to unearth a passion that was dormant. In the future I want to create more art, whether it be musical or visual. Having received mentorship from Chuck and Chris, I intend to become an influential individual for young artists that may be experiencing a similar war within.

I was in a 3 month long bout of clinical depression and escaping it was nearly impossible. I would spend every night hearing a voice reminding me of the constant reality of death, and how I would eventually lose my family because of time. As an escape I would drive out to the ocean at night and stare into the waves. It gave me a sense of comfort to think about how we essentially all came from the ocean and one day I would return in one way or another. When it came time for me to make my first musical production, I wanted to express the emotions and the life of the ocean to other people. So I made a story out of sound.