Disney means so much to me, and anyone who knows me knows that. My love of Disney Princess' is what started my passion for all things Disney, and it carries into adulthood. Each magical story lets my mind wander to make-believe and fairytale endings. Imagining what I would do if each Princess I watched, learned the songs word for word. As a young girl, that is what we all enjoyed, it was ‘normal’ for everyone to have a favorite Princess and wear tiaras. Frankly, I loved them all, appreciating little things about every one of them. All my friends had Princesses’ they looked like, that they could dress up as for Halloween, whereas I never felt connected that way to any of them. I formed my connections to their personalities and traits, and my favorite songs. Then, in 2016 everything changed for me. I was 16 at this point, well past the age most girls were into Princess’, but my love to daydream about magical worlds, extravagant lives and overcoming challenges, never ceased. I heard all the stories about the new Latina Princess, Elena of Avalor, that would be coming to Disney. The first time I saw her, a part of my inner little girl healed, the 16-year-old me was excited for all the young tan-skin, dark-haired Latinas who could have a pretty princess to look up to, and me now still is so proud of the character that represents so many cultures. Since I was a young girl, I longed for representation, because I saw how beautiful it was, but the lack thereof did not stop my love for the stories and magic. And then, at age 16, it was all healed for me. I had my Princess. Being part Mexican, growing up I was darker than most of my peers, had way more hair and talked of foods they didn't know of. Elena helped me feel proud of where I come from and brought forth a beautiful example to show a little about Latinx culture. She is bold, caring, family-oriented, and all things I felt connected to. Her world is filled with magic, animals, friends, challenges, and so many parts of my culture that I was so happy to see represented by my favorite storytellers. I watched her show as much as I could, just appreciating the wonderfulness that it is. Now, I know Elena like the back of my hand. I never falter to tell people about my favorite Princess, the first Latina Princess and how much good her story did for me and all the other little girls out there that look like her.

This piece labeled The Faces of Grief is a digital drawing remake I made from a hand-drawn piece. It was something I created amid deep sadness, remembering and mourning the loss of my Mom, nearing her anniversary of when she took her own life on September 17th, 2020. The day also happens to fall upon my father's birthday (they have been divorced since I was a child). When she passed, I moved in with my aunt and uncle for a year and then, later on, to live on my own. My whole life changed at 20 years old, just barely an adult still figuring out life. After her passing, I felt there was a grace period when people understood that I would be unwell. Most people in my life reached out to me in that first year, they were gentle and attentive. And then time went on, and everyone's wounds and worries seemed to heal. While mine are ever so fresh, with each holiday, birthday, anniversary and moment that a girl needs her Mom, insignificant or life-changing things that remind me of the hole in my heart that she left. I created this when I was struggling with feeling like everyone I loved expected me to be fine, now that it had been over a year. Art is often my way to calm myself down from feeling low, it gives my brain something to focus on and simultaneously allows me to process how Im feeling without having to say it out loud. During this time I was being treated carelessly by some family and friends and did not know what else to do other than to put on a brave face and deal with my emotions on my own, no matter how much it hurt to do in the process. Each part of these feelings is represented in my drawing. My face is the one that is drawn, looking up towards my own hands and reaching out from all the words and phrases I think and feel; this part of the piece is a cut version of the original hand-drawn, to really emphasize how personal and internal it is. My hands are grabbing onto the barbed wire frame, to showcase how painful it is to leave all my feelings and emotions inside, to reach out to pick a face that I must put on for the world. The day my mother died, a part of me went with her. My entire life I will have to consistently tend to that wound, as grief is never linear and I am ever learning how to deal with it. Losing a mother so young, in such a harsh and gruesome, is not something I have found others to relate to (bitter-sweetly). One way that I help myself feel understood is through my art, often being a moment of solace to look back on when I realize it helped me through a difficult day.