As a young girl, our perception of the world is shaped by our experiences, but most importantly, by the women in our lives. Our first meaningful connection with womanhood is often formed through the bond with our maternal figure. For some, this relationship is a source of unwavering support, creating a sense of safety as they navigate the murky waters of life, knowing their mother is there to guide them. For me, that certainty was not always present in the way I needed or craved. I speak of my mother not out of critique, but to illustrate how she shaped the woman I’ve become. A single parent raising three children, she embodied resilience—juggling two jobs while pursuing higher education. Her example taught me grit, hard work, and perseverance. With this, I was also taught that emotional support was something I had to cultivate within myself. I hold no resentment for my upbringing; every experience—joyful or painful—has shaped me. Growing up with a strong but emotionally distant maternal figure taught me self-reliance. This fostered a deep sense of self-awareness and accountability. There’s something both terrifying and liberating about realizing you are responsible for your success, happiness, and well-being. This realization gave me the strength to build a beautiful life for myself. Currently, I am a sophomore in undergrad, financially supporting myself through two jobs. I prioritize my mental health, actively heal from trauma, and create a safe space within myself. While the journey is nonlinear, I am grateful to be able to navigate life's murky waters with an unconditional support system rooted within myself. This internal navigation has allowed me to extend that space to others as well. Holding myself accountable for my actions, responsibilities, and mistakes has been both challenging and rewarding. My greatest lesson has been learning to balance self-accountability with grace. Letting go of unrealistic expectations and embracing who I am each day has allowed me to show up as my authentic self. I’ve learned to distribute my energy more effectively, taking on what I can while recognizing when I need rest. Accountability means not only recognizing how we show up for ourselves but also acknowledging our impact on others. Growing up in an emotionally neglectful environment taught me to be receptive to feedback and open-minded about how my actions affect others. This has deepened my accountability in relationships and my capacity to validate others’ experiences. This journey of accountability has also redefined my idea of success. We are often fed societal expectations, especially as women, of what success should look like. For a long time, I pushed myself to excel academically, striving for validation through external achievements. However, I realized that these accomplishments didn’t fulfill me. Today, I define success as maintaining peace amid chaos and living purposefully. This newfound definition of success fuels my passion for serving others—people and the planet. As an Environmental Science student, I am dedicated to protecting natural habitats and advocating for ecosystems that cannot speak for themselves. As a yoga instructor, I create a safe space for college students to connect with their inner selves. Through my work at the Office of Social Justice and Diversity, I serve marginalized communities on campus, advocating for their rights and building inclusive spaces. I’ve understood that success is not measured by external accolades but by the peace and purpose we cultivate within and share with the world. I am committed to using my resilience, self-reliance, and sense of accountability to create positive change, both within myself and in the communities I serve.

Growing up, I witnessed firsthand the changes in my environment. I was raised in a low-income apartment complex, navigating the difficulties of a toxic household that often left me feeling isolated and unworthy. My escape was the lush woods surrounding the complex—a place where others saw danger, but I found sanctuary. In the canopy of trees, I cultivated a deep love and respect for the ecosystems around me. Those woods became my refuge, nurturing my connection with nature and inspiring me to become a tree hugger, a bug lover, and ultimately, an aspiring environmental scientist. Over time, however, I watched these ecosystems vanish, replaced by luxury housing developments that not only destroyed my natural haven but also drove up the cost of living, making it harder for my mother to support us. This experience ignited my passion for both ecosystem preservation and social equality. While this was the start of my journey, my dedication has only grown. As I learned more about the devastating impact humanity has on the environment and how our actions threaten countless species, I felt called to take action. This is why I am pursuing a degree in Environmental Science with a minor in Biology—to equip myself with the knowledge and tools to not only advocate but also conduct research that contributes to the fight against climate change. My goal is to protect not just the species we are endangering but also humanity itself. Mother Nature has been my protector since childhood; now, it’s my turn to protect her. When I first began learning about global warming as an adolescent, I was terrified and overwhelmed. But instead of succumbing to fear, I channeled it into action, researching ways to reduce my carbon footprint. I’ve been a vegetarian for six years, which has significantly reduced my environmental impact—vegetarian diets cut carbon emissions by about 50%. I also began to make more mindful choices in my daily life, from reducing energy consumption by being conscious of power and water usage to embracing recycling and upcycling. I stopped wasting clothes, choosing instead to donate or repurpose them, and I now shop exclusively at second-hand stores. Not only is this sustainable, but it has also been a financial lifesaver. I love sharing my favorite plant-based recipes with friends or taking loved ones to thrift stores to introduce them to more sustainable lifestyles. Ultimately, I believe that education is the most powerful tool for change—the more I learn, the more I can share with others. In summary, environmental advocacy is my passion, rooted in a desire for equality. My purpose is to fight for a world where the environment and social justice go hand in hand. Protecting vulnerable ecosystems is as important to me as fighting for the rights of marginalized communities. Both are essential to creating a healthier, more just world.

A Journey of Healing and Alchemizing Pain On the morning of October 14, 2023, I embarked on a significant chapter of my healing journey: I attended my first clinical therapy session. The therapist, a kind-eyed woman with a gentle demeanor, asked me standard questions to gauge my mental health. One question, "Have you ever tried therapy before?" struck a chord. It highlighted how stigmatized mental health had been in my life. I recounted the first time I became aware of therapy and the harsh response I received when I asked my family to attend. Once being greeted by a slap across the face, my father, drunk and dismissive, told me therapy was for rich white people, and my mother warned that sharing family matters with a stranger would be disgraceful. Finally, at eighteen, I could sign myself up for therapy as a legal adult, having waited for this moment since I was seven. Though I had been my own therapist for eleven years, this self-reliance fostered a deep understanding of myself and a resilience that I wouldn't have gained otherwise. I realized early on that my path to success required significant healing. As I delved deeper into self-discovery, I started using the term "alchemizing" instead of healing. Alchemizing (noun): A seemingly magical process of transformation, creation, or combination. In my view, it is a form of spiritual liberation arising from detachment from worldly experiences. It is the process of transforming pain into inspiration and refusing to let trauma define or limit my ability to create a beautiful life. I come from a lineage of men and women burdened with pain and deprived of the tools to transform it into love. As a result, I was taught that love equaled pain and that pain was an inevitable part of life. A higher power seemed to decide that I would bear a seemingly unbearable weight, forcing me to either alchemize my pain or die. While alchemizing was not my innate response, thankfully that same higher power took the second option away from me, giving me a second chance at this beautiful journey that is life. I first learned that self-willed death was an option much too young: the victim who neared such an undeserving death was my mother. I can remember as early as seven, whilst in the kitchen helping my mother make dinner, I began to see her cry. I hugged her for a seemingly infinite moment and stood on my tippy toes, wiping the tears off of her face. I asked her what was wrong. To this day, I can remember the sound of her whisper “I simply want to die”. This wasn't the first or last time I heard those words, and eventually, I echoed them myself. Words have immense power, a truth I underestimated until I saw my mother’s words manifest into action and I was the one fighting between her and that self-induced attempt at death. Through shared strength, my mother and I are still here, and we now find solace in simple joys, like walking in the park together and spotting blue jays. Mental illness can steal joy and destroy lives, but I am determined to restore joy to my mother's heart and help her find the beauty in life. Carrying my family’s pain has been a heavy burden. My parents suffer from untreated mental illness, and as the youngest of eight siblings, I am the only one actively breaking the cycle. I have lost four siblings to generational trauma—one to death, two to drugs, and another to jail. The remaining siblings suppress their pain, risking it manifesting into something destructive. Despite the weight of my family’s pain, it does not define me; my response to it does. My therapist once asked how I maintain hope and love despite enduring so much trauma. The answer lies in finding love in every crevice of life, especially where it is absent. Many situations left me feeling abandoned and unworthy, but instead of personalizing this pain, I chose to alchemize it. Alchemizing has allowed me to detach from past and ongoing traumas and build a beautiful life for myself. During some of the most challenging years of my life, I proudly came out to the world, built a loving relationship with my first girlfriend, excelled academically, got into all of my colleges, and evolved as a human being. Today, as I continue to process my trauma and its impact on my subconscious and mental health, I am proud to maintain a healthy relationship with my girlfriend, surrender to the journey of therapy, nourish myself, and find joy in the simple magic of the human experience. I attribute much of my resilience to actively seeking light in dark times. There is beauty in pain, often found in lessons. Growing up without unconditional love taught me to love others deeply, fostering fulfilling relationships. Financial instability taught me to save and manage money, enabling me to pay for my college education solely with my income and the support of scholarships. The abuse and neglect I faced taught me to be gentle with myself and cater to my needs without relying on others. Watching my family’s struggles taught me to be kind to others, as we never know what burdens they carry themselves. Everyone has a story with chapters of pain they’ve endured, and we are all just trying our best to alchemize our experiences and stay alive. However, my journey has shown me that "staying alive" should not be the standard. We can grow through what we go through and emerge as more vibrant, loving individuals. Our struggles and mental illnesses do not define us. By being open about our challenges, we make room for support to flow in and receive tools to create a beautiful life for ourselves beyond mere survival. We all deserve to restore joy in our hearts and thrive.