In many ways, my life has been defined by the challenges I’ve faced and the ways I’ve learned to live through them—not just survive, but live with intention, care, and community. As someone who has navigated ADHD, anxiety, hypochondria, panic attacks, and alcoholism, I understand the depth of what it means to fight battles that no one else can see. These experiences shaped not only who I am but also how I approach my academic and personal goals. They’ve taught me resilience, self-awareness, and the value of choosing to show up for myself every day, even when it feels impossibly hard.
During my undergraduate years, I used alcohol as a way to cope with the overwhelming pressures of life and school. It became a way to numb the anxiety and silence the voice of perfectionism that never seemed satisfied. But what began as a coping mechanism spiraled into something far more destructive. Eventually, I was diagnosed with fatty liver disease and type 2 diabetes, health conditions that forced me to confront the damage I was doing to my body. The choice was stark: continue on this path and risk losing my health entirely, or stop and begin the long, messy work of recovery.
Sobriety wasn’t easy. It required unlearning the habits I’d built to shield myself from pain and replacing them with healthier, more sustainable ways of coping. Therapy became a cornerstone of my recovery, helping me address the root causes of my mental health challenges and substance use. I also began incorporating mindfulness practices into my daily routine, including meditation and somatic check-ins, which grounded me in the present moment and helped me build a more compassionate relationship with my body. Recovery, for me, became about more than just abstaining from alcohol—it became about learning how to live fully and authentically, even when life feels uncertain or overwhelming.
These experiences deeply inform my academic goals. I am currently pursuing work that centers QTBIPOC (queer, trans, Black, Indigenous, people of color) individuals, particularly those navigating chronic illness, disability, and mental health challenges. My goal is to write a memoir and book of essays about my own journey, using storytelling as a tool to empower others to reclaim their narratives. Through my writing, I want to provide a roadmap for those who feel like their identities and experiences make them invisible, showing that it’s possible to carve out space for ourselves even in systems that often work against us.
In addition to writing, I am committed to expanding the workshops I currently facilitate on topics like crisis planning, grief transitions, and access needs. These workshops provide practical tools for resource-building and self-advocacy, particularly for those in marginalized communities. My vision is to create a digital library of accessible resources that can serve as a lifeline for individuals navigating similar struggles.
Recovery remains an ongoing process. I manage my mental health through a combination of therapy, mindfulness practices, and setting boundaries that protect my time and energy. I’ve learned to prioritize rest and slowness, resisting the societal pressure to always be productive. Instead, I measure success by how present I can be—for myself, for my loved ones, and for the communities I serve. I also stay deeply connected to my support system, which includes friends, chosen family, and mentors who remind me that it’s okay to ask for help.
Ella’s story resonates with me because it reflects the kind of fighting spirit I see in myself and in the people I work with. Her determination to “do better” mirrors my own commitment to continue growing—not just academically but as a person who believes in the transformative power of care, both for ourselves and for each other. This scholarship would allow me to further my goals by supporting my writing and workshops, providing me with the resources I need to continue my recovery while giving back to others.
My journey has taught me that resilience isn’t about never falling—it’s about getting back up, again and again, no matter how hard it feels. It’s about holding space for growth, even when it’s uncomfortable or slow. And it’s about learning to carry both joy and pain in the same hands, knowing that neither defines us entirely but both shape who we are.
Thank you for considering my story and for honoring Ella’s legacy by supporting those of us who are still fighting to live fully, fiercely, and authentically.