Growing up with a single parent has shaped my life in ways I am still discovering. Before my dad left, I felt like I was a different person. It was the summer before seventh grade when he was arrested for committing a felony, and my mom, my younger brothers, and I were left with emotional scars that we will carry forever. Our financial security vanished overnight, and we faced the daunting question of what to do next. I say “we,” but in reality, it was my mom who bore the brunt of the burden. My dad’s departure was not a simple walk out the door and she protected us from knowing the ugly truth of what he did for the longest time. Looking back, I understand why I reacted the way I did. I never questioned my dad’s guilt; my focus was on how my family would cope. I later realized that my relationship with him was merely superficial. He never truly connected with me, as he lacked the skills to build a meaningful bond. Our conversations were meaningless, and he did not know my interests or feelings. This lack of connection made his absence leave me even more confused. After losing a significant source of income, my family underwent a pivotal lifestyle change. My mom was determined that we would not move away for three reasons: the circumstances of her job would expose our personal life, my brothers’ and my education mattered, and we "shouldn't let our lives shut down because of something we didn't do” (her words). So, we stayed. Through financial and emotional turmoil, I learned to pretend everything was fine to avoid unwanted attention, even from my closest friends--living in a gossip-centric community made it imperative to not wash our dirty laundry in public. This led to anxiety and a tangled web of white lies, along with some Oscar-worthy acting moments, if I say so myself. Which led me to my pivotal realization: After learning about the cycle of abuse that runs rampant on my dad’s side of the family, including what he experienced during his childhood, I decided I wanted to take my trauma, lessons learned, and pay it forward. I aspire to be a pediatric psychiatrist, where I can create a safe space where people can let down their walls, breathe, and feel safe away from the cause of their pain. But if the cause turns out to be their own mind, that’s okay too. I want to create a safe space for adolescents and families to be honest with themselves, each other, and heal. My mother supports me wholeheartedly and has given me invaluable advice about knowing what you want in life. The culmination of her sacrifices has taught me that if you hold kindness in one hand and courage in the other, you cannot go wrong. I aspire to use my talents to help others, just as she has helped me. I want to create a supportive environment for those facing challenges, ensuring they know they are not alone.

Charli XCX's song "Apple," from her album brat, captivates me with its themes of generational trauma, introspection, and escapism. Among all the tracks, "Apple" resonates deeply as Charli lays bare her struggles with family dynamics and self-identity, giving voice to feelings that mirror my own experiences. In "Apple," Charli confronts her family history with lyrics like, “I guess the apple don't fall far from the tree / 'Cause I've been looking at you so long / Now I only see me.” As someone who has experienced the effects of generational trauma and watched it wreck my dad’s life completely—and mine by association—the raw lyrics of "Apple" speak to me in more ways than one. Charli's words hit on the familiar pain of seeing aspects of one's parents reflected in oneself, highlighting a cycle that can be difficult to break. This introspective moment in the song captures the haunting effect of generational patterns, showing how family struggles can shape our identities often without us realizing it. Beyond the lyrics, I also love how Charli takes honest words and puts them to a fun beat, musically representing the common behavior of traumatized individuals who use humor to cope. This juxtaposition between dark themes and an upbeat sound perfectly encapsulates the escapist approach many people take to handle unresolved pain, finding solace in music that distracts from the weight of reality. I often return to "Apple" to relive the feeling of 'brat' Summer, because, like a true diva, Charli XCX perfectly blends meaningful lyrics and a sick beat. It’s a track that has the unique power to make me feel seen while offering a cathartic sense of freedom.

The most pivotal moment of my teenage years, unfortunately, was when my family changed forever. I wish these years had typical challenges, like discovering who I will be while enjoying youth. Instead, I cannot think of my teenage years without considering how they began. My dad was arrested when I was twelve years old, and his reckless, thoughtless behavior changed my family’s lives. I think this experience made me more introspective, more likely to search for alternate meanings in art. Often, I hear breakup songs and think of my dad instead. One of the songs that resonates with me is “the grudge” by Olivia Rodrigo. Her lyrics beautifully articulate the complexities of being hurt by someone but not being able to stop thinking about them. When I first heard this song, I felt an immediate connection. The way she blends feelings of pain, longing, and unresolved hurt mirrors much of my experience growing up in the shadow of my dad's actions. The song contains multiple lines that reflect my experience, so I hope you’ll forgive me if I use more than one. The second verse of the song hit me like a train: “The arguments that I have won against you in my head / In the shower, in the car and in the mirror before bed / Yeah I’m so tough when I’m alone and I make you feel so guilty / And I fantasize about a time you’re a little fuckin’ sorry.” This perfectly encapsulates the inner monologue I’ve had with my dad over the years. I’ve imagined him being sorry—truly sorry—for what he did, but I know that moment will never come. The pre-chorus speaks to another part of my struggle, particularly what it’s like trying to analyze the mind of the person who hurt you: “And I try to understand why you would do this all to me / You must be insecure, you must be so unhappy / And I know in my heart, hurt people hurt people.” This line is not only emotionally-intelligent, but brilliant with the use of “hurt” as an adjective and verb. The next line, “And we both drew blood, but man, those cuts were never equal,” also resonates. While I’ve distanced myself from him, the wounds he left on me cut far deeper than anything I could ever inflict on him. The chorus is particularly special because it intensifies as it goes along. Rodrigo sings “And I try to be tough, but I wanna scream / How could anybody do the things you did so easily? And I say I don’t care, I say that I’m fine / But you know I can’t let it go, I’ve tried, I’ve tried, I’ve tried for so long / It takes strength to forgive but I don’t feel strong.” The confession of trying to act tough is exactly how I felt at ages 12-14, then realizing that acting tough is not the same as being strong, and finally realizing that maybe I don’t know how to be strong. The last lyrics of the song are “It takes strength to forgive but / I’m not sure I’m there yet / It takes strength to forgive, but.” She ends the song on an unfinished thought, symbolizing that ever-present notion of ‘not knowing’ that defines the teenage years. The lyrics in “the grudge” perfectly describe how one feels in the moment of being young, trying to get over something, but not knowing how to. The openness and honesty in her lyrics make me feel seen, and I'm reminded that healing is a process, not a destination.

I have been a fan of Sabrina Carpenter for ten years, and my admiration for her has only grown as I have followed her career. I first saw her on the Disney Channel show "Girl Meets World," where she played Maya Hart. From the moment I met her character, I was drawn to Maya's strength, humor, and wit. She was a character who faced challenges head-on, and I remember looking up to her as a kid, wishing I could be as strong and confident as she was. Then, I saw Sabrina portray Jenny Parker in "Further Adventures in Babysitting." Jenny felt like a reflection of myself. She was organized, smart, and good at school, but she also needed the other characters to show her that it was okay to have fun and make mistakes. I loved Jenny not only because she reminded me of my own personality but also because she was so different from Maya. This contrast helped me realize that it is okay not to be perfect because no one is. As I grew older I discovered Sabrina's music, which added another layer to my admiration for her. I remember countless sleepovers with my friends scream-singing her song “Thumbs” over and over; a core memory I’ll cherish forever. In fact, after I saw her music videos for “Smoke and Fire” and “Eyes Wide Open,” I felt inspired to create my own videos as a kid as an attempt to be like Sabrina (though they were not nearly as good as hers!) However, my journey as a fan has not been without its challenges. I watched as Sabrina faced online hate and ostracism, and my heart broke for someone I felt I had known for years. Hearing people at school speak negatively about her was awful, and I often found myself wanting to defend her, but I mostly kept quiet because I didn’t know what to say other than “You’re wrong!” Thankfully, Sabrina's album "emails I can’t send" skyrocketed her career and marked a turning point in her life for the better. Especially after she went on tour and crafted "Nonsense" outros for each town, I loved watching her humor go viral as thousands of people began appreciating the sharp wit I've enjoyed in interviews and videos for years. It was incredible to see her hard work pay off and to witness her experience the success she has always deserved. Then, I was over the moon when I found out that not only is her hard work finally paying off, but she also got to go on tour with her idol Taylor Swift! Seeing everything in Sabrina’s work go well after so many months in the dark was the best experience a fan can have. Her journey has taught me the importance of perseverance and resilience, and I feel grateful to have had her as a role model throughout my life. Sabrina Carpenter has impacted my life in so many ways. From her strong characters to her inspiring music, she has shown me that it is okay to be myself and that I can overcome any challenge. I will always cherish the memories I have created while being a fan of hers, and I can’t wait to see where her career takes her next.

Reading has been my favorite pastime for as long as I can remember. Whenever I faced hardship or adversity, I turned to books for comfort and escape. As soon as I could read, I was fascinated by the countless stories available at my fingertips. When I was about seven, I asked the librarian at my elementary school if I could help arrange books, and to my surprise, she said yes! My love for literature never waned, and I was a library aide until my last year of high school. My real love for books came from the I Survived series by Lauren Tarshis. I was captivated by the characters' resilience and bravery, which resonated with me even at that young age. My next phase began, of course, with Harry Potter. In sixth grade, I devoted the months from January to April to finishing it. My friends thought I was crazy for carrying those hefty chapter books around, but I was insatiable; I needed to read! Plus, it made me feel like Hermione Granger! Since then, I have mostly read Fantasy, Young Adult, and Dystopian genres, with authors like Rick Riordan and Sarah J. Maas becoming my biggest inspirations. Their characters are incredibly vivid and their humor made them seem almost real at times. During the darkest period in my life—when my dad promptly left and our lives were turned upside down—I found comfort in these books. Characters like Reyna and Annabeth from the "Percy Jackson" series, Aelin from "Throne of Glass," and Nesta from "A Court of Thorns and Roses" became my guiding lights. Their strength and determination made me think, "If they can do it, so can I." During this challenging period, I realized I wanted to take my trauma and lessons learned and pay it forward. I aspire to be a pediatric psychiatrist, where I can create a safe space where people can let down their walls, breathe, and feel safe away from the cause of their pain. But if the cause turns out to be their own mind, that’s okay too. I want to help children and adolescents navigate their struggles, just as the characters in my favorite books helped me. While I found solace in stories, I often wished for a professional to talk to, especially one who was not prone to gossip like many in my town. When I struggled to find inspiration in real life, I drew strength from my favorite characters. I admired the young revolutionaries who seek to change the world, but I was also drawn to leaders—the ones everyone looks to for wisdom and guidance. Someday, I hope to be that comforting presence. While it is amazing to read about characters my age, I am a planner at heart, and I know someday I want to be helping others navigate their struggles and helping them heal. The books I’ve read have profoundly shaped my goals and aspirations. They have taught me about resilience, empathy, and the importance of creating safe spaces for others. They provided comfort during difficult times and inspired me to pursue a career dedicated to helping others. I am grateful for the lessons learned from my favorite characters and look forward to using those lessons to make a positive impact in the lives of those I will serve. I always love meeting fellow readers because there is a quiet understanding between those who appreciate books as art—art that is delightful, emotionally captivating, and a conduit for escapism in a troubled world. So, I love the idea behind this scholarship and thank you for considering my application.

I have chosen to pursue a medical degree to become a pediatric psychiatrist. This field is currently lacking in patient care, effectiveness, and humanity. Many are quick to prescribe simply because they were taught to treat symptoms, but psychiatry is more complex than this. One must listen to the person and treat them holistically because mental health is not a simple subject with simple solutions. It is a moving target, drifting through seasons of one’s life and is constantly affected by home life, relationships with others, stressors, diet, lifestyle, and so much more. These implications become much more severe and precious when working with pediatric patients. I will not regard my patients as though they are simply items on a to-do list. I vow to be a psychiatrist who listens rather than prescribes to move along in the day. I am currently a sophomore at Louisiana State University, majoring in Psychology concentrated in Cognitive Neuroscience. My studies have deepened my understanding of mental health and its complexities. Through my coursework and research, I have learned that effective mental health care goes beyond just treating symptoms. It involves understanding the whole person and their unique experiences. This knowledge has reinforced my desire to become a pediatric psychiatrist who provides compassionate and comprehensive care. As a woman in the healthcare field, I hope to bring empathy, patience, and a listening ear to my practice. I believe that these qualities are essential for building trust and rapport with patients, especially children. Pediatric patients are often vulnerable and may not fully understand what they are going through. It is crucial to create a safe and supportive environment where they feel heard and understood. I also hope to advocate for better mental health care for children. Mental health issues in children are often overlooked or misunderstood. By raising awareness and promoting education, I can help break down the stigma surrounding mental health and encourage early intervention. Early intervention is key to preventing long-term mental health issues and promoting healthy development. Furthermore, I am committed to continuous learning and professional development. The field of psychiatry is constantly evolving, and it is important to stay updated with the latest research and best practices. By keeping my finger on the pulse of medical literature, I can provide the best possible care to my patients and make a meaningful impact in their lives. In conclusion, I have chosen to pursue a degree in healthcare to become a pediatric psychiatrist because I believe that every child deserves compassionate and effective mental health care. As a woman in the healthcare field, I hope to bring empathy, advocacy, and continuous learning to my practice. By doing so, I can make a positive impact on the lives of my patients and contribute to the overall improvement of mental health care for children.

I discovered Taylor Swift when I was five years old with her third album, 'Speak Now.' I loved it so much that I remember playing it repeatedly on my mom’s iPod Touch. Every ‘Swiftie’ has a story just like this—knowing the exact album that started everything for them. The reason becoming a Swiftie is such a core memory is because she is unlike any other artist; rather than making a hit single every few years, she creates hit albums that each cover a wide range of emotions and subjects (with '1989' arguably being her best one). Some fans gravitate towards her upbeat tracks, some like the ballads, and some fall into the middle, like myself. My favorite song from '1989' is “Clean” because of Swift’s brilliant approach to singing about mental health and how she uses the song to connect with her fans. Throughout her career, Taylor Swift has proven herself to be a very intentional, methodical person, and this rings true in the artistic details of “Clean.” She incorporates figurative language, namely imagery and metaphors, to portray feelings of desperation, relief, and reflection. She first uses imagery when setting the scene of a house experiencing a drought. When a storm approaches, the narrator punches a hole in the roof, lets the rain pour in, and after the flood leaves, they finally feel clean; all of which is a metaphor for hardship. She also uses juxtaposition in the lines “And the sky turned black like a perfect storm” and “When I was drowning that’s when I could finally breathe” to convey mental health's complex and multifaceted nature. I also love how Swift accurately displays mental health by acknowledging that the journey is never really over in the lines “You’re still all over me like a wine-stained dress I can’t wear anymore” and “Just because you’re clean don’t mean you don’t miss it.” In the production, she uses a mbira and a vibraphone to imitate the sound of water droplets in the melody to pay tribute to the role water plays in the story. Such clever, artistic details in addition to the figurative language used in the lyrics are part of why “Clean” is my favorite. This metaphor for welcoming pain and hardship into your life as a way to overcome it speaks to me in my mental health journey, as it has with countless others. Another reason “Clean” is my favorite is because Swift recognized the impact it had on her fans and honors that whenever she performs it. On the first night of the 1989 World Tour, she introduced “Clean” by delivering a heartfelt speech, assuring everyone they have the strength to overcome anything. On her Reputation Tour in Tampa, Florida, she gave a different speech when she recalled her experience with sexual assault and expressed how her heart goes out to those whose own trauma was dismissed or ignored before singing the song. I think the safe space “Clean” established for a community of strangers to acknowledge their mental health is truly wonderful. This relationship between artist and fan has always made Taylor Swift stand out. One doesn't have to be a Swiftie to know of her achievements and writing capabilities, both of which are prevalent in '1989,' but those who appreciate the artistry, deeper meanings, and creative genius of her music will inevitably find themselves touched. The final aspect I love about "Clean" is its hidden beauty; it didn't need to be a chart-topper or drastically change pop music, as it is remarkable in its own right if assessed with the same carefulness it was created with.