Having spent nearly a decade engaging and leading faith-based domestic service opportunities and advocating for immigrant and refugee rights in Texas, my husband and I started our marriage by committing to serve as Catholic volunteers in Thailand with Maryknoll Lay Missioners. This time in Thailand expanded my world view and deepened my commitment to global solidarity and justice. Returning to Tucson after our time in Thailand was a natural choice for my husband, Daniel and I. After 12 years of marriage we were finally going to have a child and it was time to be where we had the community and support of family. For me, returning home after twenty years was a challenge. Nothing had changed and everything had changed! On top of that, the culture shock of settling back into life in the US had our heads spinning. But the reality of being new parents turned our life inside out as well as grounded us and gave us focus. Thankfully we had a number of years with my mom and dad playing the grandparent role to a tee. Regular dinners together, road trips to visit family out of town, babysitting (aka spoiling) and help with after school pick up. Although I was becoming more aware of the reality of my parents’ aging process, my dad’s health started to wane. My sister and I had just begun discussing the need to start going with him to doctors appointments to figure out what was going on with all his various ailments. A few appointments later, a cancer diagnosis was made and it did not look good. Even with aggressive treatment we would only be prolonging the inevitable. With the hope of offering comfort and a better quality of life for his remaining time, he began home hospice care. The sudden cancer diagnosis, his brief time on hospice and subsequent death rocked our world. In the span of three months, we, along with my sister and brother and their families, supported my mom and dad through this journey of his passing. And once he was gone, without too much thought or planning other than the reality that Daniel and I had the most freedom and flexibility, we became my mom’s primary caregiver. Legally blind and no longer driving, she could not live alone. Her desire to remain at home with family for as long as possible became our new act of service and solidarity. In what felt like the blink of an eye, our little threesome was changed forever. There are a lot of platitudes said about caring for an aging parent, but anyone who has gone through it knows just how hard it can be. We spent the next five years experiencing the joys and the challenges of caring for Nana. It’s almost two years now since she passed peacefully and at home. I’m still processing the highs and lows, the beauty and the pain, of a life well lived coming to an end. Were there things I wish we would have done differently? Definitely. Should my sister and I get medals for surviving the gauntlet of our broken medical system? Indeed! Are my husband and daughter saints for walking this journey with me and our extended family? I sure think so. Although sometimes I feel sad or frustrated that my plan to go back to school and my career was put on hold, I know this past decade of service to my family will only serve to enrich all the new experiences yet to come. And for this, I feel truly blessed.

Having spent nearly a decade engaging and leading faith-based domestic service opportunities and advocating for immigrant and refugee rights in Texas, my husband and I started our marriage by committing to serve as Catholic volunteers in Thailand with Maryknoll Lay Missioners. This time in Thailand expanded my world view and deepened my commitment to global solidarity and justice. Returning to Tucson after our time in Thailand was a natural choice for my husband, Daniel and I. After 12 years of marriage we were finally going to have a child and it was time to be where we had the community and support of family. For me, returning home after twenty years was a challenge. Nothing had changed and everything had changed! On top of that, the culture shock of settling back into life in the US had our heads spinning. But the reality of being new parents turned our life inside out as well as grounded us and gave us focus. Thankfully we had a number of years with my mom and dad playing the grandparent role to a tee. Regular dinners together, road trips to visit family out of town, babysitting (aka spoiling) and help with after school pick up. Although I was becoming more aware of the reality of my parents’ aging process, my dad’s health started to wane. My sister and I had just begun discussing the need to start going with him to doctors appointments to figure out what was going on with all his various ailments. A few appointments later, a cancer diagnosis was made and it did not look good. Even with aggressive treatment we would only be prolonging the inevitable. With the hope of offering comfort and a better quality of life for his remaining time, he began home hospice care. The sudden cancer diagnosis, his brief time on hospice and subsequent death rocked our world. In the span of three months, we, along with my sister and brother and their families, supported my mom and dad through this journey of his passing. And once he was gone, without too much thought or planning other than the reality that Daniel and I had the most freedom and flexibility, we became my mom’s primary caregiver. Legally blind and no longer driving, she could not live alone. Her desire to remain at home with family for as long as possible became our new act of service and solidarity. In what felt like the blink of an eye, our little threesome was changed forever. There are a lot of platitudes said about caring for an aging parent, but anyone who has gone through it knows just how hard it can be. We spent the next five years experiencing the joys and the challenges of caring for Nana. It’s almost two years now since she passed peacefully and at home. I’m still processing the highs and lows, the beauty and the pain, of a life well lived coming to an end. Were there things I wish we would have done differently? Definitely. Should my sister and I get medals for surviving the gauntlet of our broken medical system? Indeed! Are my husband and daughter saints for walking this journey with me and our extended family? I sure think so. Although sometimes I feel sad or frustrated that my plan to go back to school and my career was put on hold, I know this past decade of service to my family will only serve to enrich all the new experiences yet to come. And for this, I feel truly blessed.