This question inspires me to answer first with a song quote from the artist, Jewel. "My hands are small, I know, but they're not yours - they are my own. And I am never broken." The next thing that comes to mind is that I'm lucky. I've lived the first part of my life. I'm 40 years old and my "mid-life crisis" is going back to school to get my degree in Social Work so that I can pursue a career change as a counselor. I'm heavily involved in my local LGBTQIA+ community. I am a titleholder in the leather and bear communities, and I spent 3 years as a volunteer with The Trevor Project as a Crisis Counselor. My point being that I've already had the opportunity to start working on the answer to this essay question. Over the last 2.5 years I've spent quite a lot of time planning, coordinating, and hosting events for the LGBTQIA+ community. Many have been bar events that ranged from purely social events to charity fundraisers for one 501(c)3 or another. Others have included sober dances, history roundtables, and game nights. I've found through all this work, plus my experience noted above, that simply creating spaces for a minority community can be the difference between a healthy and unhealthy mindset. When the world becomes scary and unfair many minorities choose the "shelter in place" method of defense. Stay home, be alone, avoid contact. There's too much unknown out there. Too many unsafe and frightening places. After winning Mr. Cleveland Leather Bear and planning my first bar event I discovered: I can create a safe space. I can put together a reason and a place for people to come together where they can simply BE. This evolved over time and expanded as I competed for and won Mr. North American Bear. Suddenly I was able to reach audiences in other parts of the country as well. The mindset is always the same: give people a reason and a place that they can simply come out. As time has gone on I've narrowed the trajectory of certain events. Sober events for the community dealing with chemical dependency. Kink events for those looking to explore themselves. Gaming events for self-identifying "nerds" who may be socially awkward. I flatter myself to think that I've been successful in these endeavors being that I'm almost 3 years in and things are still going strong. Beyond this active community involved above, I can tell you on a personal level that something else I can do to make a positive impact: adjust my OWN trajectory. After a successful 22-year career in which I climbed the corporate ladder into Senior Management, it was my volunteer work for The Trevor Project that forever changed my life. I stepped out of management for the first time since I was 19 years old and began focusing on changing myself. I wanted to DO for my community, but how? I opted to go back to school for Social Work. I can continue to work for my community from a different angle. All while continuing my work as a planner and titleholder within the community. I'm only one person, sure. But the last 2.5 years have shown me what ONE person is capable of doing. I will continue to create safe spaces for people, give them the social exposure they need, and continue talking to my community to understand its needs. And I'd like to end with a song quote from Rachel Platten: "I might only have match. But I can make an explosion."

My name is Andy Curtiss and I am a 40-year-old gay professional. I grew up at a time when you could hear a million different stories about abuses that LGBT people were enduring at the hands of our society. It wasn't safe to be "out" - not safe for your career or even for your own health. Despite how frustrating today's world can be, I am grateful every day for the progress that we've made. Things are far from perfect. But we're making progress and that's what matters the most. Being gay in a conservative Italian household wasn't an easy feat. I hid it for as long as I could, having realized at an early age that I was "different" than the other boys. With the invention of the internet, I think that my generation of young LGBT folks had this massive untapped resource that previous generations didn't have in their development. However... what I failed I realize was that with this huge resource also came a trap: The history folder. I had no idea it existed until the day my father accosted me with its contents. While the finer details of that day are buried deep under layers of trauma, something that does stick out was him screaming at the top of his lungs, "Is this the shit you like?!" before angrily ripping a plaque off our living room wall and almost striking me with it. I endured the bullying, harassment, and abuse at the hands of my own "flesh and blood." And while I wouldn't wish that upon anyone, it's helped forge me into who I am today. It created a sense of justice and desire to fight for minorities. It's my experience with suicide (my attempt and that of those around me) that has put me in the position of returning to school to get a Social Work degree at 39 years old. Not very long after the above-mentioned episode, I had comforted myself with the idea that taking my own life would be the answer to all of the problems. Mom was in deep denial about me being gay and asking aloud, "What did I do wrong?" and my father wouldn't even speak to me. My younger sister, my only sibling, was young enough that she didn't get what was happening beyond that the family was upset. Me being removed from the picture would be the solution, right? Thankfully my attempt was unsuccessful and remains a secret from my family to this day. What DID happen was that years down the line I came to heavily respect the work of The Trevor Project. I'd had someone to turn to that night, with my father's gun in my hand. And I realized how lucky I was. I had friends online who'd lost boyfriends and siblings to suicide. So three years ago I finally applied to be a Trevor Project counselor. The application process was rigorous and the training was intense. But what I found on the other side was unmistakably rewarding. I'd had a 22-year, successful career with a successful business in a successful industry. But after 3 years of volunteering for The Trevor Project I'd realized that I'd found my real, actual calling. A degree in Social Work will allow me to pivot my career away from making a very rich man even richer to working for my community. The very first time a 13-year-old lesbian thanked me for convincing her to put down the pills and stay with us for another day saying, "I think you saved a life tonight" was moving beyond words.

My name is Andy Curtiss and I am a 40-year-old gay professional. I grew up at a time when you could hear a million different stories about abuses that LGBT people were enduring at the hands of our society. It wasn't safe to be "out" - not safe for your career or even for your own health. Despite how frustrating today's world can be, I am grateful every day for the progress that we've made. Things are far from perfect. But we're making progress and that's what matters the most. Being gay in a conservative Italian household wasn't an easy feat. I hid it for as long as I could, having realized at an early age that I was "different" than the other boys. With the invention of the internet, I think that my generation of young LGBT folks had this massive untapped resource that previous generations didn't have in their development. However... what I failed I realize was that with this huge resource also came a trap: The history folder. I had no idea it existed until the day my father accosted me with its contents. While the finer details of that day are buried deep under layers of trauma, something that does stick out was him screaming at the top of his lungs, "Is this the shit you like?!" before angrily ripping a plaque off our living room wall and almost striking me with it. I endured the bullying, harassment, and abuse at the hands of my own "flesh and blood." And while I wouldn't wish that upon anyone, it's helped forge me into who I am today. It created a sense of justice and desire to fight for minorities. It's my experience with suicide (my attempt and that of those around me) that has put me in the position of returning to school to get a Social Work degree at 39 years old. Not very long after the above-mentioned episode, I had comforted myself with the idea that taking my own life would be the answer to all of the problems. Mom was in deep denial about me being gay and asking aloud, "What did I do wrong?" and my father wouldn't even speak to me. My younger sister, my only sibling, was young enough that she didn't get what was happening beyond that the family was upset. Me being removed from the picture would be the solution, right? Thankfully my attempt was unsuccessful and remains a secret from my family to this day. What DID happen was that years down the line I came to heavily respect the work of The Trevor Project. I'd had someone to turn to that night, with my father's gun in my hand. And I realized how lucky I was. I had friends online who'd lost boyfriends and siblings to suicide. So three years ago I finally applied to be a Trevor Project counselor. The application process was rigorous and the training was intense. But what I found on the other side was unmistakably rewarding. I'd had a 22-year, successful career with a successful business in a successful industry. But after 3 years of volunteering for The Trevor Project I'd realized that I'd found my real, actual calling. A degree in Social Work will allow me to pivot my career away from making a very rich man even richer to working for my community. The very first time a 13-year-old lesbian thanked me for convincing her to put down the pills and stay with us for another day saying, "I think you saved a life tonight" was moving beyond words.

My name is Andy Curtiss and I am a 40-year-old gay professional. I grew up at a time when you could hear a million different stories about abuses that LGBT people were enduring at the hands of our society. It wasn't safe to be "out" - not safe for your career or even for your own health. Despite how frustrating today's world can be, I am grateful every day for the progress that we've made. Things are far from perfect. But we're making progress and that's what matters the most. Being gay in a conservative Italian household wasn't an easy feat. I hid it for as long as I could, having realized at an early age that I was "different" than the other boys. With the invention of the internet, I think that my generation of young LGBT folks had this massive untapped resource that previous generations didn't have in their development. However... what I failed I realize was that with this huge resource also came a trap: The history folder. I had no idea it existed until the day my father accosted me with its contents. While the finer details of that day are buried deep under layers of trauma, something that does stick out was him screaming at the top of his lungs, "Is this the shit you like?!" before angrily ripping a plaque off our living room wall and almost striking me with it. I endured the bullying, harassment, and abuse at the hands of my own "flesh and blood." And while I wouldn't wish that upon anyone, it's helped forge me into who I am today. It created a sense of justice and desire to fight for minorities. It's my experience with suicide (my attempt and that of those around me) that has put me in the position of returning to school to get a Social Work degree at 39 years old. Not very long after the above-mentioned episode, I had comforted myself with the idea that taking my own life would be the answer to all of the problems. Mom was in deep denial about me being gay and asking aloud, "What did I do wrong?" and my father wouldn't even speak to me. My younger sister, my only sibling, was young enough that she didn't get what was happening beyond that the family was upset. Me being removed from the picture would be the solution, right? Thankfully my attempt was unsuccessful and remains a secret from my family to this day. What DID happen was that years down the line I came to heavily respect the work of The Trevor Project. I'd had someone to turn to that night, with my father's gun in my hand. And I realized how lucky I was. I had friends online who'd lost boyfriends and siblings to suicide. So three years ago I finally applied to be a Trevor Project counselor. The application process was rigorous and the training was intense. But what I found on the other side was unmistakably rewarding. I'd had a 22-year, successful career with a successful business in a successful industry. But after 3 years of volunteering for The Trevor Project I'd realized that I'd found my real, actual calling. A degree in Social Work will allow me to pivot my career away from making a very rich man even richer to working for my community. The very first time a 13-year-old lesbian thanked me for convincing her to put down the pills and stay with us for another day saying, "I think you saved a life tonight" was moving beyond words.

My name is Andy Curtiss and I am a 40-year-old gay professional. I grew up at a time when you could hear a million different stories about abuses that LGBT people were enduring at the hands of our brothers and sisters across the world. It wasn't safe to be "out" - not safe for your career or even for your own health. Despite how frustrating today's world can be, I am grateful every day for the progress that we've made. Things are far from perfect. But we're making progress and that's what matters the most. Being gay in a conservative Italian household wasn't an easy feat. I hid it for as long as I could, having realized at an early age that I was "different" than the other boys. With the invention of the internet, I think that my generation of young LGBT folks had this massive untapped resource that previous generations didn't have in their development. However... what I failed I realize was that with this huge resource also came a trap: The history folder. I had no idea it existed until the day my father accosted me with its contents. While the finer details of that day are buried deep under layers of trauma, something that does stick out was him screaming at the top of his lungs, "Is this the shit you like?!" before angrily ripping a plaque off our living room wall and almost striking me with it. I endured the bullying, harassment, and abuse at the hands of my own "flesh and blood." And while I wouldn't wish that upon anyone, it's helped forge me into who I am today. It created a sense of justice and desire to fight for the underdogs and minorities. It's my experience with suicide (my attempt and that of those around me) that has put me in the position of returning to school to get a Social Work degree at 39 years old. Not very long after the above-mentioned episode, I had comforted myself with the idea that taking my own life would be the answer to all of the problems. Mom was in deep denial about me being gay and asking aloud, "What did I do wrong?" and my father wouldn't even speak to me. My younger sister, my only sibling, was young enough that she didn't get what was happening beyond that the family was upset. Me being removed from the picture would be the solution, right? Thankfully my attempt was unsuccessful and remains a secret from my family to this day. What DID happen, however, was that years down the line I came to heavily respect the work of The Trevor Project. I'd had someone to turn to that night, with my father's gun in my hand. And I realized how lucky I was. I had friends online (back in the days of mIRC chat rooms) who'd lost boyfriends and siblings to suicide. So three years ago I finally applied to be a Trevor Project counselor. The application process was rigorous and the training was intense. But what I found on the other side was unmistakably rewarding. I'd had a 22-year, successful career with a successful business in a successful industry. But after 3 years of volunteering for The Trevor Project I'd realized that I'd found my real, actual calling. A degree in Social Work will allow me to pivot my career away from making a very rich man even richer to working for my community. The very first time a 13-year-old lesbian thanked me for convincing her to put down the pills and stay with us for another day saying, "I think you saved a life tonight" was moving beyond words. I've found my place in my community. I'm happier than I've ever been. I'm home.

My name is Andy Curtiss and I am a 40-year-old gay professional. I grew up at a time where you could hear a million different stories about abuses that LGBT employees were enduring at the hands of employers across the world. It wasn't safe to be "out" at work - not safe for your career or even for your own health. Despite how frustrating today's world can be, I am grateful every day for the progress that we've made. Things are far from perfect. But we're making progress and that's what matters the most. Being gay in a conservative Italian household wasn't an easy feat. I hid it for as long as I could, having realized at an early age that I was "different" than the other boys. With the invention of the internet, I think that my generation of young LGBT folks had this massive untapped resource that previous generations didn't have in their development. However... what I failed I realize was that with this huge resource also came a trap: The history folder. I had no idea it existed until the day my father accosted me with its contents. While the finer details of that day are buried deep under layers of trauma, something that does stick out was him screaming at the top of his lungs, "Is this the shit you like?!" before angrily ripping a plaque off our living room wall and almost striking me with it. It's my experience with suicide (my attempt and that of those around me) that has put me in the position of returning to school to get a Social Work degree at 40 years old. Not very long after the above-mentioned episode, I had comforted myself with the idea that taking my own life would be the answer to all of the problems. Mom was in deep denial about me being gay and asking aloud, "What did I do wrong?" and my father wouldn't even speak to me. My younger sister, my only sibling, was young enough that she didn't get what was happening beyond that the family was upset. Me being removed from the picture would be the solution, right? Thankfully my attempt was unsuccessful and remains a secret from my family to this day. What DID happen, however, was that years down the line I came to heavily respect the work of The Trevor Project. I'd had someone to turn to that night, with my father's gun in my hand. And I realized how lucky I was. I had friends online (back in the days of mIRC chat rooms) who'd lost boyfriends and siblings to suicide. So three years ago I finally applied to be a Trevor Project counselor. The application process was rigorous (as you could imagine) and the training was intense. But what I found on the other side was unmistakably rewarding. I'd had a 22-year, successful career with a successful business in a successful industry. But after 3 years of volunteering for The Trevor Project I'd realized that I'd found my real, actual calling. A degree in Social Work will allow me to pivot my career away from making a very rich man even richer to working for my community. The very first time a 13-year-old lesbian thanked me for convincing her to put down the pills and stay with us for another day saying, "I think you saved a life tonight" was moving beyond words. My time with The Trevor Project, and working directly in the mental health arena was difficult, but it was also moving and inspirational. I took some of my own advice and got healthy - I lost 200lbs. I began getting more and more active within my local LGBTQIA+ community, winning both the Mr. Cleveland Leather Bear and then the Mr. North American Bear contests. I found myself a community - a chosen family. Today I am busier than I ever would have imagined, planning events, doing LOTS of volunteer work, working full time, going to school, and still finding time to date. To think that there was a time where I comforted myself with the thoughts, "It's okay... I just need to make it home to where dad hides the gun" is unreal to me now. I love my life. I found my place in my community. I'm happier than I've ever been. I'm home.

My name is Andy Curtiss and I am a 40-year-old gay professional. I grew up at a time when you could hear a million different stories about abuses that LGBT employees were enduring at the hands of employers across the world. It wasn't safe to be "out" at work - not safe for your career or even for your own health. Despite how frustrating today's world can be, I am grateful every day for the progress that we've made. Things are far from perfect. But we're making progress and that's what matters the most. Being gay in a conservative Italian household wasn't an easy feat. I hid it for as long as I could, having realized at an early age that I was "different" than the other boys. With the invention of the internet, I think that my generation of young LGBT folks had this massive untapped resource that previous generations didn't have in their development. However... what I failed I realize was that with this huge resource also came a trap: The history folder. I had no idea it existed until the day my father accosted me with its contents. While the finer details of that day are buried deep under layers of trauma, something that does stick out was him screaming at the top of his lungs, "Is this the shit you like?!" before angrily ripping a plaque with our family name off our living room wall and almost striking me with it. It's my experience with suicide (my attempt and that of those around me) that has put me in the position of returning to school to get a Social Work degree at 39 years old. Not very long after the above-mentioned episode, I had comforted myself with the idea that taking my own life would be the answer to all of the problems. Mom was in deep denial about me being gay and asking aloud, "What did I do wrong?" and my father wouldn't even speak to me. My younger sister, my only sibling, was young enough that she didn't get what was happening beyond that the family was upset. Me being removed from the picture would be the solution, right? Thankfully my attempt was unsuccessful and remains a secret from my family to this day. What DID happen, however, was that years down the line I came to heavily respect the work of The Trevor Project. I'd had someone to turn to that night, with my father's gun in my hand. And I realized how lucky I was. I had friends online (back in the days of mIRC chat rooms) who'd lost boyfriends and siblings to suicide. So three years ago I finally applied to be a Trevor Project counselor. The application process was rigorous and the training was intense. But what I found on the other side was unmistakeably rewarding. I'd had a 22-year, successful career with a successful business in a successful industry. But after 3 years of volunteering for The Trevor Project I'd realized that I'd found my real, actual calling. A degree in Social Work will allow me to pivot my career away from making a very rich man even richer to working for my community. The very first time a 13-year-old lesbian thanked me for convincing her to put down the pills and stay with us for another day saying, "I think you saved a life tonight" was moving beyond words. Success is moving the dial one tick closer toward inclusion and safety within my community. Success is one kid who feels better about themselves. Success is one LGBTQIA+ person who can go on when they didn't think they could before. Success is my community, locally and federally, being a better place than how I found it. I've found some success already. And with a degree and career change, I'll be that much closer to even more.

My name is Andy Curtiss and I am a 40-year-old gay professional. I grew up at a time when you could hear a million different stories about abuses that LGBT employees were enduring at the hands of employers across the world. It wasn't safe to be "out" at work - not safe for your career or even for your own health. Despite how frustrating today's world can be, I am grateful every day for the progress that we've made. Things are far from perfect. But we're making progress and that's what matters the most. Being gay in a conservative Italian household wasn't an easy feat. I hid it for as long as I could, having realized at an early age that I was "different" than the other boys. With the invention of the internet, I think that my generation of young LGBT folks had this massive untapped resource that previous generations didn't have in their development. However... what I failed I realize was that with this huge resource also came a trap: The history folder. I had no idea it existed until the day my father accosted me with its contents. While the finer details of that day are buried deep under layers of trauma, something that does stick out was him screaming at the top of his lungs, "Is this the shit you like?!" before angrily ripping a plaque off our living room wall and almost striking me with it. It's my experience with suicide (my attempt and that of those around me) that has put me in the position of returning to school to get a Social Work degree at 39 years old. Not very long after the above-mentioned episode, I had comforted myself with the idea that taking my own life would be the answer to all of the problems. Mom was in deep denial about me being gay and asking aloud, "What did I do wrong?" and my father wouldn't even speak to me. My younger sister, my only sibling, was young enough that she didn't get what was happening beyond that the family was upset. Me being removed from the picture would be the solution, right? Thankfully my attempt was unsuccessful and remains a secret from my family to this day. What DID happen, however, was that years down the line I came to heavily respect the work of The Trevor Project. I'd had someone to turn to that night, with my father's gun in my hand. And I realized how lucky I was. I had friends online (back in the days of mIRC chat rooms) who'd lost boyfriends and siblings to suicide. So three years ago I finally applied to be a Trevor Project counselor. The application process was rigorous and the training was intense. But what I found on the other side was unmistakeably rewarding. I'd had a 22-year, successful career with a successful business in a successful industry. But after 3 years of volunteering for The Trevor Project I'd realized that I'd found my real, actual calling. A degree in Social Work will allow me to pivot my career away from making a very rich man even richer to working for my community. The very first time a 13-year-old lesbian thanked me for convincing her to put down the pills and stay with us for another day saying, "I think you saved a life tonight" was moving beyond words. I've found my place in my community. I'm happier than I've ever been. I'm home.

My name is Andy Curtiss and I am a 40-year-old gay professional. I grew up at a time when you could hear a million different stories about abuses that LGBT employees were enduring at the hands of employers across the world. It wasn't safe to be "out" at work - not safe for your career or even for your own health. Despite how frustrating today's world can be, I am grateful every day for the progress that we've made. Things are far from perfect. But we're making progress and that's what matters the most. Being gay in a conservative Italian household wasn't an easy feat. I hid it for as long as I could, having realized at an early age that I was "different" than the other boys. With the invention of the internet, I think that my generation of young LGBT folks had this massive untapped resource that previous generations didn't have in their development. However... what I failed I realize was that with this huge resource also came a trap: The history folder. I had no idea it existed until the day my father accosted me with its contents. While the finer details of that day are buried deep under layers of trauma, something that does stick out was him screaming at the top of his lungs, "Is this the shit you like?!" before angrily ripping a plaque off our living room wall and almost striking me with it. It's my experience with suicide (my attempt and that of those around me) that has put me in the position of returning to school to get a Social Work degree at 39 years old. Not very long after the above-mentioned episode, I had comforted myself with the idea that taking my own life would be the answer to all of the problems. Mom was in deep denial about me being gay and asking aloud, "What did I do wrong?" and my father wouldn't even speak to me. My younger sister, my only sibling, was young enough that she didn't get what was happening beyond that the family was upset. Me being removed from the picture would be the solution, right? Thankfully my attempt was unsuccessful and remains a secret from my family to this day. What DID happen, however, was that years down the line I came to heavily respect the work of The Trevor Project. I'd had someone to turn to that night, with my father's gun in my hand. And I realized how lucky I was. I had friends online (back in the days of mIRC chat rooms) who'd lost boyfriends and siblings to suicide. So three years ago I finally applied to be a Trevor Project counselor. The application process was rigorous and the training was intense. But what I found on the other side was unmistakeably rewarding. I'd had a 22-year, successful career with a successful business in a successful industry. But after 3 years of volunteering for The Trevor Project I'd realized that I'd found my real, actual calling. A degree in Social Work will allow me to pivot my career away from making a very rich man even richer to working for my community. The very first time a 13-year-old lesbian thanked me for convincing her to put down the pills and stay with us for another day saying, "I think you saved a life tonight" was moving beyond words. I've found my place in my community. I'm happier than I've ever been. I'm home.

I have been reading tarot cards since I was 13 years old. Tarot has had a very special place in my life and my heart. I have a "travel deck" that I keep in my car - a Rider Waite deck that's easily understood and very basic. But in my bedroom, inside my headboard, I store my personal deck, a Hanson-Roberts deck based on Rider Waite, but more colorful - which is me. Colorful and wanting to be understood. I hope this doesn't disqualify me, but I can't choose just one. My favorite tarot cards are The Sun and The Moon - Il Sole e La Luna. I love the dichotomy between the sun and the moon. They're the perfect opposites and the ideal team members. And while I would never condescend to say that I am "the perfect" combination or representation of the sun and the moon, I like to think I embody them both pretty well. The moon is a beautiful mystery and feminine power. Magic... intuition... the world that's below the surface that some of us can only imagine and fantasize about. The flow of emotions and feelings that is as strong and potentially destructive as the tide. On the other side is the sun, health and prosperity. It's the masculine confidence that every man strives for. The sun is successful and blunt - it shines its light upon the truth of a situation and illuminates the happiness in our lives. Together, they are transformation. And THAT has been the last few years of my life. Losing 200lbs, going back to school for a new profession, finding myself in a polyamorous relationship that I wasn't looking for when I'd never even tried that in the past, a new position at work (after a 22 year career), and so forth. I am 40 years old and finally discovering who I am deep down. I've reclaimed my life and channeled that energy from the moon and that confidence from the sun. I was last year's Mr. Cleveland Leather Bear and the current Mr. North American Bear. In the spring I will stand on stage in front of a thousand people and run for International Mister Leather is 70 other men from around the world. I've used my titles to create events in my community, fundraisers for charity and people in need, and created a safe space for people to explore themselves sexually and otherwise. I've become someone in my community that can be approached and asked for help. One of my "bar kids" is currently renting a room from me because he found himself kicked out of his home. I've taken community members to doctor appointments, served as an emergency contact, and been called a father figure. A few months ago I had Il Sole and La Luna tattooed, in a simple black card form, on either of my shoulders. They serve as a reminder of the blessed life I lead and the need for BOTH to be present in my life to balance me out. It's also a reminder of the beauty in the world - the grace that's there if we choose to see it. It's a dichotomy that's meaningful and imporant and I simply adore it.

I'm going to be very upset with myself for this answer, but I'll give it anyway and explain. If I could have everyone in the world read just one book, it would be Harry Potter and Sorcerer's Stone by J.K. Rowling. This is problematic for me as a very proud member of the LGBTQIA+ community. Rowling's stance against trans people has caused me much consternation. I'd go so far as to say that it's caused a sense of hurt and betrayal. Like finding out that Luna Lovegood is a racist or Ron Weasley hates Jewish people. Rowling created a universe in which people who were different could take refuge within. So her speaking against a marginalized group who simply wishes to exist hurts my soul. However, that being said, the reason I wish everyone would read this book transcends the challenges I have with Rowling and her philosophy. The first Harry Potter book is a very deliberate choice. The language in which it is written is such that anyone who picks it up can understand it. It would be easy for me to answer Tolkien's The Hobbit instead. Or Huckleberry Finn by Twain. Those books also do what Harry Potter does - create a universe that you can escape into. But the problem is that they're written in such a way that some of our general population of "the world" may not really understand the finer details. And it's vitally important that whatever book we inspire people to pick up be understood easily. The simple truth is that we live in a world in which reading isn't treated as a priority. And for many in poverty situations, reading can be a luxury that they can't afford, assuming they even have the skill. That's what makes the plain language and simple fantasy mix of the first Harry Potter book perfect. The biggest reason for choosing this book though is the rich and palpable world that is created in the Harry Potter books. Magic is suddenly not only plausible but structured while still being fun and unpredictable. We have a cast of characters fleshed out so beautifully that you fantasize about what you'd say if you met them face to face. This easily digestible book, combined with the rich and vibrant fantasy world enables us to not only escape... but to engage our fantasies and expand our horizons. What could be better?

The night I came out to my parents, at 15 years old, was the first time I was ever truly afraid of my father. I'd known I was gay since I was 12 or 13. I'd even told some people at school at that point. But I knew my father wouldn't take the news well. And Mom has been emotionally beaten down by him for years... she wasn't going to stand up for me either. Dad had found some incriminating evidence on my browser history. And you'll need to understand that this was the late 90's... the internet was still in its infancy, and I had no idea that a thing called a "history folder" existed... live and learn, right? Dad got falling-down-drunk that night. He screamed and yelled in ways that I'd never seen before. He called me every slur he could think of - at the top of his lungs. He ripped a plaque off our living room wall. It had a poem on it about how you get your last name from your father and how you should honor it and so forth... there was a heinous moment I was sure he was going to hit me with it. It was not a good experience. Since then, my father and I don't communicate about my sexuality or the men I date. He's not a part of my life in any meaningful way. When I got married in 2015, he wouldn't come to the ceremony. He DID come to the reception but didn't speak to anyone, didn't dress up, and in every picture taken, he looks like he's sat on a tack. My mother and sister eventually came around though, thankfully, and have been my biggest supporters. Much to my father's consternation, I've gone on to own this part of me. I am a Trevor Project Suicide Prevention Counselor one or two nights a week. I was on the Board of Directors for LGBTQ+Allies Lake County. And I even assisted in planning our county's very first Pride celebration last June. And to cap that all off, I’ve been a part of the pageant circuit, winning both Mr. Cleveland Leather Bear 2022 and then going on to win Mr. North American Bear 2023. This thrust me into my community – and I *LOVE* it. I have a successful career with a large manufacturer in the garment decoration industry. It's been twenty-two years with this employer - and I'm the first openly LGBT person to be a part of senior management. But I can safely say that this isn't my final destination. My work with my community taught me that I have a bigger purpose. So, at 39 years old I returned to school to work towards my Bachelor in Social Work. The first stop is an Associate of Applied Science in Human Services. Then on to Youngstown State University for my Social Work degree. I want to serve my local LGBT community in Lake County, Ohio as a counselor. I have several ideas on specifically where I could end up, but first things first - education. I’ve overcome family trauma, abuse, a jarring divorce from the man who said “til death do us part,” and climbing the corporate ladder from the age of 19. I’ve done my time making a rich man richer. It’s time for me to shift trajectories and focus on my community full-time instead of it just being a weekend volunteer situation. I’ve lived through enough to know what I’m doing and what I want. And it’s NEVER too late.

The night I came out to my parents, at 15 years old, was the first time I was ever truly afraid of my father. I'd known I was gay since I was 12 or 13. I'd even told some people at school at that point. But I knew my father wouldn't take the news well. And Mom has been emotionally beaten down by him for years... she wasn't going to stand up for me either. Dad had found some incriminating evidence on my browser history. And you'll need to understand that this was the late 90's... the internet was still in its infancy, and I had no idea that a thing called a "history folder" existed... live and learn, right? Dad got falling-down-drunk that night. He screamed and yelled in ways that I'd never seen before. He called me every slur he could think of - at the top of his lungs. He ripped a plaque off our living room wall. It had a poem on it about how you get your last name from your father and how you should honor it and so forth... there was a heinous moment I was sure he was going to hit me with it. It was not a good experience. Since then, my father and I don't communicate about my sexuality or the men I date. He's not a part of my life in any meaningful way. When I got married in 2015, he wouldn't come to the ceremony. He DID come to the reception but didn't speak to anyone, didn't dress up, and in every picture taken, he looks like he's sat on a tack. My mother and sister eventually came around though, thankfully, and have been my biggest supporters. Much to my father's consternation, I've gone on to own this part of me. I am a Trevor Project Suicide Prevention Counselor one or two nights a week. I was on the Board of Directors for LGBTQ+Allies Lake County. And I even assisted in planning our county's very first Pride celebration last June. And to cap that all off, I’ve been a part of the pageant circuit, winning both Mr. Cleveland Leather Bear 2022 and then going on to win Mr. North American Bear 2023. This thrust me into my community – and I *LOVE* it. I have a successful career with a large manufacturer in the garment decoration industry. It's been twenty-two years with this employer - and I'm the first openly LGBT person to be a part of senior management. But I can safely say that this isn't my final destination. My work with my community taught me that I have a bigger purpose. So, at 39 years old I returned to school to work towards my Bachelor in Social Work. The first stop is an Associate of Applied Science in Human Services. Then on to Youngstown State University for my Social Work degree. I want to serve my local LGBT community in Lake County, Ohio as a counselor. I have several ideas on specifically where I could end up, but first things first - education. I’ve overcome family trauma, abuse, a jarring divorce from the man who said “til death do us part,” and climbing the corporate ladder from the age of 19. I’ve done my time making a rich man richer. It’s time for me to shift trajectories and focus on my community full-time instead of it just being a weekend volunteer situation. I’ve lived through enough to know what I’m doing and what I want. And it’s NEVER too late.

My story isn't that of your typical college student. I'm 40 years old and have had a successful career for the last 22 years with the same company. I've climbed the ladder from frontline employee to senior management. This was private-sector work in the garment decoration industry. I established myself as someone within our industry who was not only knowledgeable but able to teach as well. So I've spent many of the last 22 years educating employees, customers, the general public - anyone who will stop and listen about our product, services, and industry as a whole. After getting divorced I began looking for volunteer opportunities to absorb some of my extra time and I came across an organization called The Trevor Project. They specialize in crisis counseling to prevent suicide in the LGBT community. As a suicide survivor, this spoke to me. Suffice it to say, I live in a section of Ohio that isn't exactly the bible belt, but it's not exactly supportive of the LGBT community either. I applied and went through rigorous testing, background check, and certification process. After I graduated from their training program, I began working with youths through The Trevor Project's "TrevorText" and "TrevorChat" functions as a Crisis Counselor. Some youths are going through traumas at school, others at home. Some are being abused physically and/or emotionally. And others want to just talk about their challenges or even plan how to come out to Mom and Dad. Others have the gun in their hands and are looking for someone to give them a valid reason to not pull the trigger. I discovered quickly that the empathy that corporate America had always told me was misplaced and too strong was as valuable as gold. So many of these youths, even those ready to do themselves the greatest harm, simply needed someone to talk to them with a little bit of understanding, validation, and love. Suddenly it became more and more difficult for me to take the trials and tribulations of my corporate America job seriously. How can I be concerned about the future of screen-printed football jerseys when countless LGBT teens consider killing themselves each day? Thus I decided to make some drastic changes in my life. I accepted a position in our Learning & Development department, marking the first time in over 20 years I wasn't managing teams of people directly, in order to have the time and energy to go back to school for Social Work. My goal is to focus on mental health in the LGBT community. Over this last year, these changes in my life have facilitated more positives for me as I become more visible and active in my community, spreading The Trevor Project's message as well as encouraging our ally communities to embrace sexual positivity. I've found my home - I've found where I'm supposed to be. I'm unsure if I want to continue to focus on suicide prevention specifically. The LGBT community could certainly use more energy in the addiction counseling realm as well. Or simply family counseling as a whole. I find that the LGBT community has very unique challenges in terms of messo-level of society. As someone who dealt with those challenges myself, I feel like I'm a candidate to assist. Regardless, my goals are bigger than myself or my lifestyle. And I'm doing what needs to be done so that I can be a force of good within my community. This scholarship would allow me to continue on this new journey.

My name is Andy Curtiss and I am a 39-year-old gay professional. I grew up at a time when you could hear a million different stories about abuses that LGBT employees were enduring at the hands of employers across the world. It wasn't safe to be "out" at work - not safe for your career or even for your health. Despite how frustrating today's world can be, I am grateful every day for the progress that we've made. Things are far from perfect. But we're making progress and that's what matters the most. Being gay in a conservative Italian household wasn't an easy feat. I hid it for as long as I could, having realized at an early age that I was "different" than the other boys. With the invention of the internet, I think that my generation of young LGBT folks had this massive untapped resource that previous generations didn't have in their development. However... what I failed I realize was that with this huge resource also came a trap: The history folder. I had no idea it existed until the day my father accosted me with its contents. While the finer details of that day are buried deep under layers of trauma, something that does stick out was him screaming at the top of his lungs, "Is this the shit you like?!" before angrily ripping a plaque off our living room wall and almost striking me with it. Oddly enough, it's my experience with suicide (my attempt and that of those around me) that has put me in the position of returning to school to get a Social Work degree at 40 years old. Not very long after the above-mentioned episode, I had comforted myself with the idea that taking my own life would be the answer to all of my problems. Mom was in deep denial about me being gay and asking aloud, "What did I do wrong?" and my father wouldn't even speak to me. My younger sister, my only sibling, was young enough that she didn't get what was happening beyond that the family was upset. Me being removed from the picture would be the solution, right? Thankfully my attempt was unsuccessful and remains, mostly, a secret from my family to this day. What DID happen, however, was that years down the line I came to heavily respect the work of The Trevor Project. I'd had someone to turn to that night, with my father's gun in my hand. And I realized how lucky I was. I had friends online (back in the days of mIRC chat rooms) who'd lost boyfriends and siblings to suicide. So three years ago I finally applied to be a Trevor Project counselor. The application process was rigorous (as you could imagine) and the training was intense. But what I found on the other side was unmistakeably rewarding. I'd had a 22-year, successful career with a successful business in a successful industry. But after 3 years of volunteering for The Trevor Project I'd realized that I'd found my real, actual calling. A degree in Social Work will allow me to pivot my career away from making a very rich man even richer to working for my community. The very first time a 13-year-old lesbian thanked me for convincing her to put down the pills and stay with us for another day saying, "I think you saved a life tonight" was moving beyond words. Why is it important to help others? Everyone you meet is fighting a battle, inside, that you know nothing about. Be kind. Be helpful.

I have served on 3 different non-profit Boards of Directors: Leadership Lake County, The James A. Garfield Alliance, and LGBTQ+Allies Lake County. For Leadership Lake County, I participate in several community events, including working with high school students in career counseling, as well as participating in "The Poverty Simulator" - an activity meant to educate teachers about what generational poverty students experience and how it's different from other students. For the James A. Garfield Alliance, we raise up the mission of the James A. Garfield National Historic Site in my hometown of Mentor, Ohio. I served the National Park as a tour guide, guest speaker, staff photographer, and social media specialist, all in a volunteer, unpaid capacity - hence being invited to join the board of their non-profit "Friends Group". And for LGBTQ+Allies Lake County I have participated actively in MANY fundraisers from bar events to fancy dinners to acting in a murder/mystery play fundraiser. I also assisted in planning our county's VERY FIRST Pride event this past June. In addition, I'm also a Suicide Prevention Counselor for The Trevor Project, the LGBT community's largest suicide prevention service in the United States. I've been a counselor for 3 years and generally work 1 or 2 shifts per week, 3 to 4 hours per shift and they're generally late hours, after work. My efforts within the LGBT community of Lake County have led to me being asked to be involved in many other efforts as well. When our local health commissioner wanted a round table to understand LGBT health challenges in our community, I was one of the people he reached out to put the round table together. I've also approached the VP of HR for the company I work for to begin putting together an LGBT Employee Resource Group within our company. I've brought LGBT concerns within the workplace to our leadership several times over the 22 years I've worked for the company and am seeking to carve out a space to make LGBT folks feel safe at work. In response to this, I've worked towards a DEI Certification and have begun teaching DEI classes both to my own company as well as other companies in my community. Instead of asking for compensation for this training, I instead ask for a donation to be made to the Trevor Project instead of payment. Lastly, I recently won a contest that named me Mr. Cleveland Leather Bear 2022 and then another contest a year later that named me Mr. North American Bear 2023. This has made me even more visible in the LGBT community. Thus far for my title years, I've raised money for several LGBT charities, including the Stonewall Softball League, the LGBT Center of Cleveland, PFLAG, GLSEN, and The Trevor Project. I've done this by attending bar events and educating folks on these charities and then taking donations or by selling things like jello shots and 50/50 raffle tickets whose proceeds all go towards the charity in question. I've used my titles to secure a place as an event co-host at one of the local bars in particular and will be allowed to raise money on a regular monthly basis for a charity of my choosing, provided I plan and put together the event. This also reflects in my college education where I've chosen to take up the banner of sexual positivity. My singular goal has become how to better serve my community. And while 40 years old may be a little late in life to make drastic changes... better late than never. I've found my passion and purpose.

My name is Andy Curtiss and I am a 39-year-old gay professional. I grew up at a time where you could hear a million different stories about abuses that LGBT employees were enduring at the hands of employers across the world. It wasn't safe to be "out" at work - not safe for your career or even for your own health. Despite how frustrating today's world can be, I am grateful every day for the progress that we've made. Things are far from perfect. But we're making progress and that's what matters the most. Being gay in a conservative Italian household wasn't an easy feat. I hid it for as long as I could, having realized at an early age that I was "different" than the other boys. With the invention of the internet, I think that my generation of young LGBT folks had this massive untapped resource that previous generations didn't have in their development. However... what I failed I realize was that with this huge resource also came a trap: The history folder. I had no idea it existed until the day my father accosted me with its contents. While the finer details of that day are buried deep under layers of trauma, something that does stick out was him screaming at the top of his lungs, "Is this the shit you like?!" before angrily ripping a plaque off our living room wall and almost striking me with it. Oddly enough, it's my experience with suicide (my own attempt and that of those around me) that has put me in the position of returning to school to get a Social Work degree at 40 years old. Not very long after the above mentioned episode, I had comforted myself with the idea that taking my own life would be the answer to all of the problems. Mom was in deep denial about me being gay and asking aloud, "What did I do wrong?" and my father wouldn't actually even speak to me. My younger sister, my only sibling, was young enough that she didn't get what was happening beyond that the family was upset. Me being removed from the picture would be the solution, right? Thankfully my attempt was unsuccessful and remains, mostly, a secret from my family to this day. What DID happen, however, was that years down the line I came to heavily respect the work of The Trevor Project. I'd had someone to turn to that night, with my father's gun in my hand. And I realized how lucky I was. I had friends online (back in the days of mIRC chat rooms) who'd lost boyfriends and siblings to suicide. So three years ago I finally applied to be a Trevor Project counselor. The application process was rigorous (as you could imagine) and the training was intense. But what I found on the other side was unmistakeably rewarding. I'd had a 22-year, successful career with a successful business in a successful industry. But after 3 years of volunteering for The Trevor Project I'd realized that I'd found my real, actual calling. A degree in Social Work will allow me to pivot my career away from making a very rich man even richer to working for my community. The very first time a 13-year-old lesbian thanked me for convincing her to put down the pills and stay with us for another day saying, "I think you saved a life tonight" was moving beyond words. I've found my place in my community. I'm happier then I've ever been. I'm home.

My story isn't that of your typical college student. I'm 40 years old and have had a successful career for the last 22 years with the same company. I've climbed the ladder from frontline employee to senior management. This was private-sector work in the garment decoration industry. I established myself as someone within our industry who was not only knowledgeable but able to teach as well. So I've spent many of the last 22 years educating employees, customers, the general public - anyone who will stop and listen about our product, services, and industry as a whole. After getting divorced I began looking for volunteer opportunities to absorb some of my extra time and I came across an organization called The Trevor Project. They specialize in crisis counseling to prevent suicide in the LGBT community. As a suicide survivor, this spoke to me. Suffice it to say, I live in a section of Ohio that isn't exactly the bible belt, but it's not exactly supportive of the LGBT community either. I applied and went through rigorous testing, background check, and certification process. After I graduated from their training program, I began working with youths through The Trevor Project's "TrevorText" and "TrevorChat" functions as a Crisis Counselor. Some youths are going through traumas at school, others at home. Some are being abused physically and/or emotionally. And others want to just talk about their challenges or even plan how to come out to Mom and Dad. Others have the gun in their hands and are looking for someone to give them a valid reason to not pull the trigger. I discovered quickly that the empathy that corporate America had always told me was misplaced and too strong was as valuable as gold. So many of these youths, even those ready to do themselves the greatest harm, simply needed someone to talk to them with a little bit of understanding, validation, and love. Suddenly it became more and more difficult for me to take the trials and tribulations of my corporate America job seriously. How can I be concerned about the future of screen-printed football jerseys when countless LGBT teens consider killing themselves each day? Thus I decided to make some drastic changes in my life. I accepted a position in our Learning & Development department, marking the first time in over 20 years I wasn't managing teams of people directly, in order to have the time and energy to go back to school for Social Work. My goal is to focus on mental health in the LGBT community. Over this last year, these changes in my life have facilitated more positives for me as I become more visible and active in my community, spreading The Trevor Project's message as well as encouraging our ally communities to embrace sexual positivity. I've found my home - I've found where I'm supposed to be. I'm unsure if I want to continue to focus on suicide prevention specifically. The LGBT community could certainly use more energy in the addiction counseling realm as well. Or simply family counseling as a whole. I find that the LGBT community has very unique challenges in terms of messo-level of society. As someone who dealt with those challenges myself, I feel like I'm a candidate to assist. Regardless, my goals are bigger than myself or my lifestyle. And I'm doing what needs to be done so that I can be a force of good within my community. This scholarship would allow me to continue on this new journey.

My name is Andy Curtiss and I am a 39-year-old gay professional. I grew up at a time where you could hear a million different stories about abuses that LGBT employees were enduring at the hands of employers across the world. It wasn't safe to be "out" at work - not safe for your career or even for your own health. Despite how frustrating today's world can be, I am grateful every day for the progress that we've made. Things are far from perfect. But we're making progress and that's what matters the most. Being gay in a conservative Italian household wasn't an easy feat. I hid it for as long as I could, having realized at an early age that I was "different" than the other boys. With the invention of the internet, I think that my generation of young LGBT folks had this massive untapped resource that previous generations didn't have in their development. However... what I failed I realize was that with this huge resource also came a trap: The history folder. I had no idea it existed until the day my father accosted me with its contents. While the finer details of that day are buried deep under layers of trauma, something that does stick out was him screaming at the top of his lungs, "Is this the shit you like?!" before angrily ripping a plaque off our living room wall and almost striking me with it. Oddly enough, it's my experience with suicide (my own attempt and that of those around me) that has put me in the position of returning to school to get a Social Work degree at 40 years old. Not very long after the above mentioned episode, I had comforted myself with the idea that taking my own life would be the answer to all of the problems. Mom was in deep denial about me being gay and asking aloud, "What did I do wrong?" and my father wouldn't actually even speak to me. My younger sister, my only sibling, was young enough that she didn't get what was happening beyond that the family was upset. Me being removed from the picture would be the solution, right? Thankfully my attempt was unsuccessful and remains, mostly, a secret from my family to this day. What DID happen, however, was that years down the line I came to heavily respect the work of The Trevor Project. I'd had someone to turn to that night, with my father's gun in my hand. And I realized how lucky I was. I had friends online (back in the days of mIRC chat rooms) who'd lost boyfriends and siblings to suicide. So three years ago I finally applied to be a Trevor Project counselor. The application process was rigorous (as you could imagine) and the training was intense. But what I found on the other side was unmistakeably rewarding. I'd had a 22-year, successful career with a successful business in a successful industry. But after 3 years of volunteering for The Trevor Project I'd realized that I'd found my real, actual calling. A degree in Social Work will allow me to pivot my career away from making a very rich man even richer to working for my community. The very first time a 13-year-old lesbian thanked me for convincing her to put down the pills and stay with us for another day saying, "I think you saved a life tonight" was moving beyond words. I've found my place in my community. I'm happier then I've ever been. I'm home.

I have served on 3 different non-profit Boards of Directors: Leadership Lake County, The James A. Garfield Alliance, and LGBTQ+Allies Lake County. For Leadership Lake County, I participate in several community events, including working with high school students in career counseling, as well as participating in "The Poverty Simulator" - an activity meant to educate teachers about what generational poverty students experience and how it's different from other students. For the James A. Garfield Alliance, we raise up the mission of the James A. Garfield National Historic Site in my hometown of Mentor, Ohio. I served the National Park as a tour guide, guest speaker, staff photographer, and social media specialist, all in a volunteer, unpaid capacity - hence being invited to join the board of their non-profit "Friends Group". And for LGBTQ+Allies Lake County I have participated actively in MANY fundraisers from bar events to fancy dinners to acting in a murder/mystery play fundraiser. I also assisted in planning our county's VERY FIRST Pride event this past June. In addition, I'm also a Suicide Prevention Counselor for The Trevor Project, the LGBT community's largest suicide prevention service in the United States. I've been a counselor for 3 years and generally work 1 or 2 shifts per week, 3 to 4 hours per shift and they're generally late hours, after work. My efforts within the LGBT community of Lake County have led to me being asked to be involved in many other efforts as well. When our local health commissioner wanted a round table to understand LGBT health challenges in our community, I was one of the people he reached out to put the round table together. I've also approached the VP of HR for the company I work for to begin putting together an LGBT Employee Resource Group within our company. I've brought LGBT concerns within the workplace to our leadership several times over the 22 years I've worked for the company and am seeking to carve out a space to make LGBT folks feel safe at work. In response to this, I've worked towards a DEI Certification and have begun teaching DEI classes both to my own company as well as other companies in my community. Instead of asking for compensation for this training, I instead ask for a donation to be made to the Trevor Project instead of payment. Lastly, I recently won a contest that named me Mr. Cleveland Leather Bear 2022 and then another contest a year later that named me Mr. North American Bear 2023. This has made me even more visible in the LGBT community. Thus far for my title years, I've raised money for several LGBT charities, including the Stonewall Softball League, the LGBT Center of Cleveland, PFLAG, GLSEN, and The Trevor Project. I've done this by attending bar events and educating folks on these charities and then taking donations or by selling things like jello shots and 50/50 raffle tickets whose proceeds all go towards the charity in question. I've used my titles to secure a place as an event co-host at one of the local bars in particular and will be allowed to raise money on a regular monthly basis for a charity of my choosing, provided I plan and put together the event. This also reflects in my college education where I've chosen to take up the banner of sexual positivity. My singular goal has become how to better service my community. And while 40 years old may be a little late in life to make drastic changes... better late than never. I've found my passion and purpose.

My story isn't that of your typical college student. I'm 40 years old and have had a successful career for the last 22 years with the same company. I've climbed the ladder from frontline employee to senior management. This was private-sector work in the garment decoration industry. I established myself as someone within our industry who was not only knowledgeable but able to teach as well. So I've spent many of the last 22 years educating employees, customers, the general public - anyone who will stop and listen about our product, services, and industry as a whole. After getting divorced I began looking for volunteer opportunities to absorb some of my extra time and I came across an organization called The Trevor Project. They specialize in crisis counseling to prevent suicide in the LGBT community. As a suicide survivor, this spoke to me. Suffice it to say, I live in a section of Ohio that isn't exactly the bible belt, but it's not exactly supportive of the LGBT community either. I applied and went through rigorous testing, background check, and certification process. After I graduated from their training program, I began working with youths through The Trevor Project's "TrevorText" and "TrevorChat" functions as a Crisis Counselor. Some youths are going through traumas at school, others at home. Some are being abused physically and/or emotionally. And others want to just talk about their challenges or even plan how to come out to Mom and Dad. Others have the gun in their hands and are looking for someone to give them a valid reason to not pull the trigger. I discovered quickly that the empathy that corporate America had always told me was misplaced and too strong was as valuable as gold. So many of these youths, even those ready to do themselves the greatest harm, simply needed someone to talk to them with a little bit of understanding, validation, and love. Suddenly it became more and more difficult for me to take the trials and tribulations of my corporate America job seriously. How can I be concerned about the future of screen-printed football jerseys when countless LGBT teens consider killing themselves each day? Thus I decided to make some drastic changes in my life. I accepted a position in our Learning & Development department, marking the first time in over 20 years I wasn't managing teams of people directly, in order to have the time and energy to go back to school for Social Work. My goal is to focus on mental health in the LGBT community. Over this last year, these changes in my life have facilitated more positives for me as I become more visible and active in my community, spreading The Trevor Project's message as well as encouraging our ally communities to embrace sexual positivity. I've found my home - I've found where I'm supposed to be. I'm unsure if I want to continue to focus on suicide prevention specifically. The LGBT community could certainly use more energy in the addiction counseling realm as well. Or simply family counseling as a whole. I find that the LGBT community has very unique challenges in terms of messo-level of society. As someone who dealt with those challenges myself, I feel like I'm a candidate to assist. Regardless, my goals are bigger than myself or my lifestyle. And I'm doing what needs to be done so that I can be a force of good within my community. This scholarship would allow me to continue on this new journey.

How could I NOT be proud to be an American when the simple truth is that if I were born in one of 41 other countries on the planet, my very existence would be illegal? In some countries, people like me are still openly killed. Shot... thrown off roofs... beaten in the streets. My thanks for being an American goes beyond simply being proud. I'm downright thankful - more than that even. I'm delighted. Blissful even. I live in a country where I'm allowed to be part of the LGBTQIA+ community, openly, and not fear governmental persecution. But it's sort of a funny dichotomy, right? Because people from my community ARE still persecuted. There's an open war happening right now against the trans community. I may not be trans myself, but they are still my brothers, sisters, and others. And it breaks my heart to see the legislation being proposed against them. The efforts against drag queens too. The simple truth is that, statistically, your children are safer with a drag queen than your average catholic clergy. And I don't say this to be inflammatory but as a simple fact. I love my country for the reasons I stated above. But moreover, I love my state... my county... my city. I was born in East Cleveland, but moved to Mentor when I was 3 years old. I've since spent my whole life in Lake County. I work here, I live here, I date here. I'm even on the Board of Directors for both Leadership Lake County and The James A. Garfield Alliance - both local organizations serving the community. I've even gone out of my way to serve the LGBTQIA+ community locally. I served on the board of LGBTQ+Allies Lake County - our first LGBT center. I am on the Pride in the CLE Ambassador Council as well, helping to plan Cleveland Pride. It would have been easy to leave Ohio. Even easier to leave Lake County and the Mentor area. It's certainly not cheap to live here. And the community has the stereotype of being a little snooty. And while I wish that wasn't true, it can be at times. Another simple truth is that the LGBTQIA+ community is based out of Lakewood in Cuyahoga County. I have plenty of friends who have asked me to move out there with them. But in the end, this is home. Lake County is beautiful and rife with opportunity. We have history, parks, entertainment, and even good food! The brochure on Lake County practically writes itself. My only wish is that my community was more welcomed. Even now Ohio is considering several pieces of legislation that sends the message to my community that we are lesser. They tell us that we're second-class citizens with less rights than others. Propogated by fear and misplaced religious zealotry. And it breaks my heart every day. When talking to friends across the country I find myself continuously defending myself for staying in Ohio and Lake County specifically. I'm a lone spot of sparkly blue in a sea of staunch red. And I feel, in my heart, that it shouldn't have to be this way. So I continue my work. I host events for my community at bars, restaurants, and party rooms. Everything from fundraisers to game nights to dance parties. I give my community safe spaces to be themselves, explore themselves, and express themselves. Where we can openly be ourselves without harming anyone. And with every event, I hope more and more that the world sees that we're just like them. Just a little more sparkly.

My name is Andy Curtiss and I am a 39-year-old gay professional. I grew up at a time where you could hear a million different stories about abuses that LGBT employees were enduring at the hands of employers across the world. It wasn't safe to be "out" at work - not safe for your career or even for your own health. Despite how frustrating today's world can be, I am grateful every day for the progress that we've made. Things are far from perfect. But we're making progress and that's what matters the most. Being gay in a conservative Italian household wasn't an easy feat. I hid it for as long as I could, having realized at an early age that I was "different" than the other boys. With the invention of the internet, I think that my generation of young LGBT folks had this massive untapped resource that previous generations didn't have in their development. However... what I failed I realize was that with this huge resource also came a trap: The history folder. I had no idea it existed until the day my father accosted me with its contents. While the finer details of that day are buried deep under layers of trauma, something that does stick out was him screaming at the top of his lungs, "Is this the shit you like?!" before angrily ripping a plaque off our living room wall and almost striking me with it. It's my experience with suicide (my attempt and that of those around me) that has put me in the position of returning to school to get a Social Work degree at 39 years old. Not very long after the above-mentioned episode, I had comforted myself with the idea that taking my own life would be the answer to all of the problems. Mom was in deep denial about me being gay and asking aloud, "What did I do wrong?" and my father wouldn't even speak to me. My younger sister, my only sibling, was young enough that she didn't get what was happening beyond that the family was upset. Me being removed from the picture would be the solution, right? Thankfully my attempt was unsuccessful and remains a secret from my family to this day. What DID happen, however, was that years down the line I came to heavily respect the work of The Trevor Project. I'd had someone to turn to that night, with my father's gun in my hand. And I realized how lucky I was. I had friends online (back in the days of mIRC chat rooms) who'd lost boyfriends and siblings to suicide. So three years ago I finally applied to be a Trevor Project counselor. The application process was rigorous (as you could imagine) and the training was intense. But what I found on the other side was unmistakeably rewarding. I'd had a 22-year, successful career with a successful business in a successful industry. But after 3 years of volunteering for The Trevor Project I'd realized that I'd found my real, actual calling. A degree in Social Work will allow me to pivot my career away from making a very rich man even richer to working for my community. The very first time a 13-year-old lesbian thanked me for convincing her to put down the pills and stay with us for another day saying, "I think you saved a life tonight" was moving beyond words. I've found my place in my community. I'm happier than I've ever been. I'm home.

I serve on 3 different non-profit Boards of Directors: Leadership Lake County, The James A. Garfield Alliance, and LGBTQ+Allies Lake County. For Leadership Lake County, I have participated in several community events, including working with high school students in career counseling, as well as participating in "The Poverty Simulator" - an activity meant to educate teachers what generational poverty students experience and how it's different from other students. For the James A. Garfield Alliance, we raise up the mission of the James A. Garfield National Historic Site in my hometown of Mentor, Ohio. I served the National Park as tour guide, guest speaker, staff photographer, and social media specialist, all in a volunteer, unpaid capacity - hence being invited to join the board of their non-profit "Friends Group". And for LGBTQ+Allies Lake County I have participated actively in MANY fundraisers from bar events to fancy dinners to acting in a murder/mystery play fundraiser. I also assisted in planning our county's VERY FIRST Pride event this past June. In addition, I'm also a Suicide Prevention Counselor for The Trevor Project, the LGBT community's largest suicide prevention service in the United States. I've been a counselor for 3 years and generally work 1 or 2 shifts per week, 3 to 4 hours per shift and they're generally late hours, after work. My efforts within the LGBT community of Lake County have lead to me being asked to be involved in many other efforts as well. When our local health commissioner wanted a round table to understand LGBT health challenges in our community, I was one of the people he reached out to in order to put the round table together. I've also approached the VP of HR for the company I work for to begin putting together an LGBT Employee Resource Group within our company. I've brought LGBT concerns within the workplace to our leadership several times over the 22 years I've worked for the company and am seeking to carve out a space to make LGBT folks feel safe at work. In response to this I've worked towards a DEI Certification and have begun teaching DEI classes both to my own company as well as other companies in my community. Instead of asking for compensation for this training, I instead ask for a donation to made to the Trevor Project in lieu of payment. Lastly, I recently won a contest that named me Mr. Cleveland Leather Bear 2022 and then another contest a year later that named me Mr. North American Bear 2023. This has made me even more visible in the LGBT community. Thus far for my title years, I've raised money for several LGBT charities, including the Stonewall Softball League, the LGBT Center of Cleveland, PFLAG, GLSEN, and The Trevor Project. I've done this by attending bar events and educating folks on these charities and then taking donations or by selling things like jello shots and 50/50 raffle tickets whose proceeds all go towards the charity in question. I've used my titles to secure a place as an event co-host at one of the local bars in particular and will be allowed to raise money on a regular monthly basis for a charity of my choosing, provided I plan and put together the event. This also reflects in my college education where I've chosen to take up the banner of sexual positivity.

I'm probably not the student you're expecting to apply for this scholarship. I'll be 40 years old in May of 2023, and I've been with the same company for the last 22 years. And while this time in the private sector has been good for me - giving me the opportunity to manage 80+ employees, 6 different departments, and be a member of senior management of a company at the top of its industry, I had an awakening that called into question the last 20-some years of what I'd been doing. Many folks in the LGBTQIA+ community, like me, have heard of The Trevor Project. Especially those of who have lost loved ones to suicide. The Trevor Project offers 24/7 FREE crisis counselor support to any LGBTQIA+ youth in trouble. And three years ago I decided the time was right for me to apply to become a volunteer and finally give back to Trevor and to my community. After an extensive background check and several interviews, I was accepted as a volunteer in training. As you can imagine, the training was tough. Trevor prepares you to talk to youth who have very painful and extenuating circumstances. You have to be prepared to talk to kids who have the weapon in their hands and intend to use it. You have to be ready to help that young life find a reason to stick around when they think they're out of reasons. After completing my training and hitting the ground without training wheels, I found that I was pretty good at this task. After more than 20 years in corporate America, it turns out that certain skills that I'd had managers trying to beat out of me for years were actually a benefit. There were talents inside me that I was able to use for the first time in my life. Empathy... Compassion... Human focus... Combined with my composed and generally unflappable nature... this was a side of myself I'd utterly lost touch with. And, wonder of wonders, I was ALSO helping the youths on the other side of the line. So not only was this exercise doing something for me, but more importantly, it was doing something for the youths who needed help to begin with. That's when it happened. It clicked. Why in the world was I spending all this time and effort in my "professional" life to make rich men richer... when youths and my community needed me? I took a leap. There was an open position in our organization that was a few levels lower than my current position in Senior Management. But this new position would mean work/life balance for the first time in many, many years. No more 15-hour days, 7-day work weeks, or being "online" all hours of the night. I'd miss the money, but I'd have my life back. This allowed me to take more action. I became more heavily involved in our local LBGTQIA+ community. I had the privilege of helping to plan our county's very first Pride festival. I hosted, organized, staffed, and planned bar nights, fundraisers, and events. And then... I decided it was time to go back to school. If I obtained my Social Work degree, I could continue to improve my community in deeper ways than I already was. All while still volunteering for The Trevor Project. This degree will enable me to counsel and guide the voices of my community that are hurting and will educate me on how to do so. Please. Help me help the community I love.

My name is Andy Curtiss and I am a 39-year-old gay professional. I grew up at a time where you could hear a million different stories about abuses that LGBT employees were enduring at the hands of employers across the world. It wasn't safe to be "out" at work - not safe for your career or even for your own health. Despite how frustrating today's world can be, I am grateful every day for the progress that we've made. Things are far from perfect. But we're making progress and that's what matters the most. Being gay in a conservative Italian household wasn't an easy feat. I hid it for as long as I could, having realized at an early age that I was "different" than the other boys. With the invention of the internet, I think that my generation of young LGBT folks had this massive untapped resource that previous generations didn't have in their development. However... what I failed I realize was that with this huge resource also came a trap: The history folder. I had no idea it existed until the day my father accosted me with its contents. While the finer details of that day are buried deep under layers of trauma, something that does stick out was him screaming at the top of his lungs, "Is this the shit you like?!" before angrily ripping a plaque off our living room wall and almost striking me with it. Oddly enough, it's my experience with suicide (my own attempt and that of those around me) that has put me in the position of returning to school to get a Social Work degree at 39 years old. Not very long after the above mentioned episode, I had comforted myself with the idea that taking my own life would be the answer to all of the problems. Mom was in deep denial about me being gay and asking aloud, "What did I do wrong?" and my father wouldn't actually even speak to me. My younger sister, my only sibling, was young enough that she didn't get what was happening beyond that the family was upset. Me being removed from the picture would be the solution, right? Thankfully my attempt was unsuccessful and remains a secret from my family to this day. What DID happen, however, was that years down the line I came to heavily respect the work of The Trevor Project. I'd had someone to turn to that night, with my father's gun in my hand. And I realized how lucky I was. I had friends online (back in the days of mIRC chat rooms) who'd lost boyfriends and siblings to suicide. So three years ago I finally applied to be a Trevor Project counselor. The application process was rigorous (as you could imagine) and the training was intense. But what I found on the other side was unmistakeably rewarding. I'd had a 22-year, successful career with a successful business in a successful industry. But after 3 years of volunteering for The Trevor Project I'd realized that I'd found my real, actual calling. A degree in Social Work will allow me to pivot my career away from making a very rich man even richer to working for my community. The very first time a 13-year-old lesbian thanked me for convincing her to put down the pills and stay with us for another day saying, "I think you saved a life tonight" was moving beyond words. I've found my place in my community. I'm happier then I've ever been. I'm home.

I'm probably not the student you're expecting to apply for this scholarship. I'll be 40 years old in May of 2023, and I've been with the same company for the last 22 years. And while this time in the private sector has been good for me - giving me the opportunity to manage 80+ employees, 6 different departments, and be a member of senior management of a company at the top of its industry, I had an awakening that called into question the last 20-some years of what I'd been doing. Many folks in the LGBTQIA+ community, like me, have heard of The Trevor Project. Especially those of who have lost loved ones to suicide. The Trevor Project offers 24/7 FREE crisis counselor support to any LGBTQIA+ youth in trouble. And three years ago I decided the time was right for me to apply to become a volunteer and finally give back to Trevor and to my community. After and extensive background check and several interviews, I was accepted as a volunteer in training. As you can imagine, the training was tough. Trevor prepares you to talk to youth who have very painful and extenuating circumstances. You have to be prepared to talk to kids who have the weapon in their hands and intend to use it. You have to be ready to help that young life find a reason to stick around when they think they're out of reasons. After completing my training and hitting the ground without training wheels, I found that I was pretty good at this task. After more than 20 years in corporate America, it turns out that certain skills that I'd had managers trying to beat out of me for years were actually a benefit. There were talents inside me that I was able to use for the first time in my life. Empathy... Compassion... Human focus... Combined with my composed and generally unflappable nature... this was a side of myself I'd utterly lost touch with. And, wonder of wonders, I was ALSO helping the youths on the other side of the line. So not only was this exercise doing something for me, but more importantly, it was doing something for the youths who needed help to begin with. That's when it happened. It clicked. Why in the world was I spending all this time and effort in my "professional" life to make rich men richer... when youths and my community needed me? I took a leap. There was an open position in our organization that was a few levels lower than my current position in Senior Management. But this new position would mean work/life balance for the first time in many, many years. No more 15-hour days, 7-day work weeks, or being "online" all hours of the night. I'd miss the money, but I'd have my life back. This allowed me to take more action. I became more heavily involved in our local LBGTQIA+ community. I had the privilege of helping to plan our county's very first Pride festival. I hosted, organized, staffed, and planned bar nights, fundraisers, and events. And then... I decided it was time to go back to school. If I obtained my Social Work degree, I could continue to improve my community in deeper ways than I already was. All while still volunteering for The Trevor Project. This degree will enable me to counsel and guide the voices of my community that are hurting and will educate me on how to do so. Please. Help me help the community I love.

My name is Andy Curtiss and I am a 39-year-old gay professional. I grew up at a time where you could hear a million different stories about abuses that LGBT employees were enduring at the hands of employers across the world. It wasn't safe to be "out" at work - not safe for your career or even for your own health. Despite how frustrating today's world can be, I am grateful every day for the progress that we've made. Things are far from perfect. But we're making progress and that's what matters the most. Being gay in a conservative Italian household wasn't an easy feat. I hid it for as long as I could, having realized at an early age that I was "different" than the other boys. With the invention of the internet, I think that my generation of young LGBT folks had this massive untapped resource that previous generations didn't have in their development. However... what I failed I realize was that with this huge resource also came a trap: The history folder. I had no idea it existed until the day my father accosted me with its contents. While the finer details of that day are buried deep under layers of trauma, something that does stick out was him screaming at the top of his lungs, "Is this the shit you like?!" before angrily ripping a plaque off our living room wall and almost striking me with it. Oddly enough, it's my experience with suicide (my own attempt and that of those around me) that has put me in the position of returning to school to get a Social Work degree at 39 years old. Not very long after the above mentioned episode, I had comforted myself with the idea that taking my own life would be the answer to all of the problems. Mom was in deep denial about me being gay and asking aloud, "What did I do wrong?" and my father wouldn't actually even speak to me. My younger sister, my only sibling, was young enough that she didn't get what was happening beyond that the family was upset. Me being removed from the picture would be the solution, right? Thankfully my attempt was unsuccessful and remains a secret from my family to this day. What DID happen, however, was that years down the line I came to heavily respect the work of The Trevor Project. I'd had someone to turn to that night, with my father's gun in my hand. And I realized how lucky I was. I had friends online (back in the days of mIRC chat rooms) who'd lost boyfriends and siblings to suicide. So three years ago I finally applied to be a Trevor Project counselor. The application process was rigorous (as you could imagine) and the training was intense. But what I found on the other side was unmistakeably rewarding. I'd had a 22-year, successful career with a successful business in a successful industry. But after 3 years of volunteering for The Trevor Project I'd realized that I'd found my real, actual calling. A degree in Social Work will allow me to pivot my career away from making a very rich man even richer to working for my community. The very first time a 13-year-old lesbian thanked me for convincing her to put down the pills and stay with us for another day saying, "I think you saved a life tonight" was moving beyond words. I've found my place in my community. I'm happier then I've ever been. I'm home.

I'm probably not the student you're expecting to apply for this scholarship. I'll be 40 years old in May of 2023, and I've been with the same company for the last 22 years. And while this time in the private sector has been good for me - giving me the opportunity to manage 80+ employees, 6 different departments, and be a member of senior management of a company at the top of its industry, I had an awakening that called into question the last 20-some years of what I'd been doing. Many folks in the LGBTQIA+ community, like me, have heard of The Trevor Project. Especially those of who have lost loved ones to suicide. The Trevor Project offers 24/7 FREE crisis counselor support to any LGBTQIA+ youth in trouble. And three years ago I decided the time was right for me to apply to become a volunteer and finally give back to Trevor and to my community. After and extensive background check and several interviews, I was accepted as a volunteer in training. As you can imagine, the training was tough. Trevor prepares you to talk to youth who have very painful and extenuating circumstances. You have to be prepared to talk to kids who have the weapon in their hands and intend to use it. You have to be ready to help that young life find a reason to stick around when they think they're out of reasons. After completing my training and hitting the ground without training wheels, I found that I was pretty good at this task. After more than 20 years in corporate America, it turns out that certain skills that I'd had managers trying to beat out of me for years were actually a benefit. There were talents inside me that I was able to use for the first time in my life. Empathy... Compassion... Human focus... Combined with my composed and generally unflappable nature... this was a side of myself I'd utterly lost touch with. And, wonder of wonders, I was ALSO helping the youths on the other side of the line. So not only was this exercise doing something for me, but more importantly, it was doing something for the youths who needed help to begin with. That's when it happened. It clicked. Why in the world was I spending all this time and effort in my "professional" life to make rich men richer... when youths and my community needed me? I took a leap. There was an open position in our organization that was a few levels lower than my current position in Senior Management. But this new position would mean work/life balance for the first time in many, many years. No more 15-hour days, 7-day work weeks, or being "online" all hours of the night. I'd miss the money, but I'd have my life back. This allowed me to take more action. I became more heavily involved in our local LBGTQIA+ community. I had the privilege of helping to plan our county's very first Pride festival. I hosted, organized, staffed, and planned bar nights, fundraisers, and events. And then... I decided it was time to go back to school. If I obtained my Social Work degree, I could continue to improve my community in deeper ways than I already was. All while still volunteering for The Trevor Project. This degree will enable me to counsel and guide the voices of my community that are hurting and will educate me on how to do so. Please. Help me help the community I love.

400 lbs. At my heaviest point, I came in at 400 lbs. The only reason I knew that, though, was that I was able to get on a family friend's livestock scale. After all, I'd literally crushed 3 previous bathroom scales in the process of trying to get weighed. I was diabetic, suffered from fatty liver, and had recently had a bout of pancreatitis that landed me in the ER for several days. I was heading down a very frightening path and I was becoming increasingly sure that I wouldn't like the destination. Lord knows I wasn't enjoying the journey thus far. I hated my body. No... hate isn't a strong enough word. I loathed my body. An all-encompassing, seething and venomous loathing. I avoided mirrors at all costs. I rarely shopped for clothes and would often joke, "I have to buy shirts at Cleveland Tent and Awning anyway..." What's worse is that as a gay man in America, I was told on more than one occasion that my own community wanted nothing to do with me. The only place I could find comfort was inside a pizza box or at the bottom of a 2 liter of Coke (never Pepsi - I'm not a godless heathen). But when you find yourself having to be weighed on a livestock scale... that's when life comes into perspective. I couldn't keep doing things this way. Something had to drastically change. I wish I could tell you that I managed to lose a boatload of weight all on my own through sheer perseverance. But at 37 years old, that wasn't going to happen that way. I did apply myself though. I got a gym membership and began working my butt off. I started going to a dietician and a support group. I learned how to properly construct meals that would nourish my body and learned how to NOT turn to food for comfort and support. And I lost a good amount of weight, sure. But 340 lbs was still too much. That's when I decided to have gastric bypass surgery. I'd considered my options and spoken to other folks my age who had the same thought process. They all had the same exactly input: I wish I'd done it sooner. Let me tell you, the next person who says, "Oh, you did the easy way" is going to get the business end of my size 13 loafer. There was nothing easy about having my insides rearranged and rewired. But I'll tell you now, 2 years later, that I have ZERO regrets. My weight plummeted to 210 lbs. Sure, I was very limited in what I could eat, but I'd learned that food was fuel - NOT PLEASURE. More importantly, my medical problems were disappearing. My liver... healthy. My pancreas... healthy. Diabetes? Gone. Blood pressure? Normal. And as ridiculous as this will sound to many, the first time I set foot in our local mall's trendiest clothing store (The Buckle if you're curious), I found myself openly weeping in the changing room as I looked at myself in a size large. Not extra large. Not "4X" as I'd worn for years. But a large. And oh my God... I liked how I looked. It was one of the most moving experiences of my life. Today as I prep to have the excess skin removed, I can report that I enjoy running. RUNNING. I hadn't run since I was 11 years old. And I love myself - physically and emotionally. New day, new me, new life. No regrets.

The United States Constitution is what guarantees every citizen certain "unalienable rights." This is the foundation for every battle that every marginalized community wages. Without this foundation, there would be no platform upon which to stand. The fight waged by Black Lives Matter or the LGBTQ+ community would be more of a revolution than a struggle for equity. Indeed, there are countries still on this globe where these rights aren't protected, and these communities, and many more, are allowed to be treated poorly without any recompense on the horizon. I find myself in a unique position to really see the freedoms and challenges of this bigger picture. I'm a caucasian male born in the United States. The magic formula to ensure that most of the world's doors are open to me. I'm also a gay man, however. I'm lucky because the marginalized community I belong to can be hidden. I can "pass" for straight easily. What this means is that while I understand oppression from the position of the LGBTQ+ community and have experienced plenty of it, I can also clearly see my privilege as a white, male, in the United States. I've never been in a position where I've had to question if I should trust a police officer. I've never felt singled out by the loss control team of a retail establishment simply for the color of my skin. I've never felt talked down to because of my gender or nationality. But as a gay man, I've experienced what it's like to be afraid to walk from a bar to my car. I've experienced what it's like to be singled out and harassed in public. I've felt the sting of both verbal and physical strikes based solely upon who I love. What this means too is that I can understand how a cis-gendered, heterosexual Caucasian male can be utterly blind to his own privilege, truly allowing me empathy of everyone's position. Despite being 39 years old and having a very successful 22-year career in the private sector, I've opted to go back to school for Social Work. This journey began unwittingly 3 years ago when I began to volunteer for The Trevor Project - the LGBTQ+ community's largest suicide prevention agency. I trained and certified as a Crisis Intervention Counselor, specializing in suicide prevention. The feelings inside me started small and have grown over the years, revealing to me that there's a bigger purpose. It began to get very difficult to go to my private sector job in my well-known industry and find satisfaction in making a rich man much richer. There are people out there suffering who could use my help in some capacity. People right in my community locally and socially. That's when I decided I would go back to school to obtain my Human Services degree and then work towards a Bachelor of Social Work. In this capacity, I'll be able to work with my community (again in a local and social sense) to not only help them strengthen their self-determination and bolster their mental health, but I'll be able to work with them on a mezzo and macro level as an advocate. I can leverage not only my education at that point, but throw the weight of my 22-year career in private sector management and operations to point out the privileges and oppressions that occur and actively undermine our constitution.

My story isn't that of your typical college student. I'm 39 years old and have had a successful career for the last 22 years with the same company. I've climbed the ladder from frontline employee to senior management. This was private-sector work in the garment decoration industry. I established myself as someone within our industry who was not only knowledgable but able to teach as well. So I've spent many of the last 22 years educating employees, customers, the general public - anyone who will stop and listen about our product, services, and industry as a whole. After getting divorced I began looking for volunteer opportunities to absorb some of my extra time and I came across an organization called The Trevor Project. They specialize in crisis counseling to prevent suicide in the LGBT community. As a suicide survivor, this spoke to me. Suffice it to say, I live in a section of Ohio that isn't exactly the bible belt, but it's not exactly supportive of the LGBT community either. I applied and went through rigorous testing, background check, and certification process. After my graduation from their training program, I began working with youths through The Trevor Project's "TrevorText" and "TrevorChat" functions as a Crisis Counselor. Some youths are going through traumas at school, others at home. Some are being abused physically and/or emotionally. And others want to just talk about their challenges or even plan how to come out to mom and dad. Others have the gun in their hands and are looking for someone to give them a valid reason to not pull the trigger. I discovered quickly that the empathy that corporate America had always told me was misplaced and too strong was as valuable as gold. So many of these youths, even those ready to do themselves the greatest harm, simply needed someone to talk to them with a little bit of understanding, validation, and love. Suddenly it became more and more difficult for me to take the trials and tribulations of my corporate America job seriously. How can I be concerned about the future of screen-printed football jerseys when countless LGBT teens consider killing themselves each day? Thus I decided to make some drastic changes in my life. I accepted a position in our Learning & Development department, marking the first time in over 20 years I wasn't managing teams of people directly, in order to have the time and energy to go back to school for Social Work. My goal is to focus on mental health in the LGBT community. Over the course of this last year, these changes in my life have facilitated more positives for me as I become more visible and active in my community, spreading The Trevor Project's message as well as encouraging our ally communities to embrace sexual positivity. I've found my home - I've found where I'm supposed to be. I'm unsure if I want to continue to focus on suicide prevention specifically. The LGBT community could certainly use more energy in the addictions counseling realm as well. Or simply family counseling as a whole. I find that the LGBT community has very unique challenges in terms of messo-level of society. As someone who dealt with those challenges myself, I feel like I'm a candidate to assist. Regardless, my goals are bigger than myself or my lifestyle. And I'm doing what needs to be done so that I can be a force of good within my community.

It was Mahatma Gandhi who said, "If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him." He didn't actually bluntly say to be the change we wish to see in the world. But he certainly alluded to it. My mother also set this example for my by being involved in our school and church functions when I was young. My mother wasn't the type who was educated enough or well-spoken enough to teach a class or anything of that nature. But when the church needed a mom to help watch kids during a sermon or vacation bible school or if the school needed a mom to help keep kids in line during a field trip, my mother was always there to volunteer. She'd comment that she didn't have much to offer, but that she'd give what she could. Needless to see I always thought she undervalued herself. And as an adult, I've learned that she was indeed wrong. The most precious resource any of us has is time. And to give freely of one's time is the most loving gesture one can make in my mind. Unfortunately, as it happens with many members of the LGBTQIA+ community, a fundamental difference in beliefs separated me from the church I had attended for 18 years. This didn't stop my desire to have a positive impact on my community and to give freely of my precious time. I discovered an LGBT charitable organization called The Trevor Project. Inspired by an independent film, The Trevor Project was an operation dedicated to suicide prevention. A survivor of suicide myself, this appealed to me and my desire to assist my community pushed me to get involved. I went through many rounds of vetting and then hours upon hours of training and become a Crisis Counselor specializing in suicide prevention. This has been the most meaningful and impactful work in my life - causing me to go back to college to pursue a degree in Social Work. And it's all done voluntarily. Through my work with The Trevor Project I learned that I could continue to positively impact my community as a gay man, but also the community in which I live. And so last year I helped to co-produce our county's very first Pride celebration. What was very important, however, was to not only give the LGBT population a safe space but to show the rest of the community that we are no different than they are. So not only did we have vendors and a stage with performers of all kinds, but we also had a kids zone in which local affirming churches were invited as well as children's entertainment ranging from pony rides and clowns to a bubble-blowing party. I continue to do my work in suicide prevention while working towards my new college degree. All while maintaining my 22-year career in corporate Learning & Development where I've recently put my diversity skills to work by teaching corporate classes on Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion - creating a safe space for all employees regardless of race, sex, religion, and creed at work. Regardless of what happens and where my life takes me, my mother's lesson of giving freely of one's time in any way they can continues to speak to me. My LGBT identity, my local identity, my corporate identity - these are al communities I can positively affect and will continue to do so out of love.

There are a million illiterate comparisons that can be made when it comes to the magic of reading and what it does to enrich our lives, ignite our imaginations, and soothe our savaged souls. The world today can be a cruel place. And a good book not only removes us, just for a moment, from that cruel world but can inspire us to come up with solutions to our problems and can quench the flames that burn inside. Or conversely can start a raging fire of passion. Reading is truly a magical and freeing experience that all of us can enjoy if we're merely encouraged to try it. But herein lies the catch with the question you're asking. What book would I want everyone to read, and why? I pondered and pondered this because I wanted to choose a book that would not only impress you with the wisdom of my selection but then whose praises I could sing to the high heavens as well. And as silly as it sounds, my brain kicked around options ranging from the first Harry Potter book and just about any J.R.R. Tolkien masterpiece to "Of Mice and Men" and "To Kill a Mockingbird." I even pondered making a case for personal favorites like "Welcome to the World Baby Girl," an underrated and underestimated hit from Fannie Flagg. Or Stephen King's "The Stand" - a book I enjoy SO much that I re-read it once a year almost religiously. But then... what about Brene Brown's "Daring Greatly?" My head spun with all the options. I started and stopped this essay no less than six times. So where did I land, you ask yourself? Here's where I landed: I would want everyone to pick up and read whatever book sparks the light of interest inside them. I know... this isn't the answer you were looking for. But if I've learned anything in my time as a corporate Learning & Development Specialist it's that you can't force people to read something that doesn't spark something inside them. Even if YOU or someone else loves it for totally valid reasons. Reading must be inspired from within one's self for it to be truly transformative. What I wish is that everyone would be open to allowing a book to take root within their hearts and for them to follow it, love it, and embrace it.

I'm probably not the type of student you're expecting to apply for this scholarship. I'm 39 years old and have spent the last 22 years at a company, climbing the corporate ladder. I went from a frontline employee to a member of senior management. In that time I've managed, hired, trained, mentored, and terminated lots and lots of employees. However, at this point in my life I've discovered something profound. You see, three years ago I began volunteering for the country's largest LGBTQIA+ suicide prevention service, called The Trevor Project. It's through those volunteer hours of being a suicide prevention counselor that I discovered work that was more meaningful and impactful than anything I'd done in 20+ years in my career. It became harder and harder to go into a corporate environment and throw my whole self into those projects and tasks when they meant so much less. I found myself becoming more and more part of my community - the LGBTQIA+ community of Cleveland. I began helping to plan events and bar nights. I even helped co-plan our little conservative county's first pride celebration. And through all these efforts (plus my time with The Trevor Project) I'd begun to realize that a change needed to happen in my life. I couldn't stay in corporate America. I'd never realized it before... but it had been killing me slowly. The stress... the meaningless toil... the drama... and now here are these things that I'm doing that mean SO much more to me. And so I stepped out of senior management and took a smaller role in our company's Learning & Development Department. I have gone back to school to obtain my degree in Social Work (first an Associate of Applied Science of Human Services, then on to a 4-year Social Work degree). With this degree I can effectively make a big career change. I can choose to help my community in a professional capacity rather than just as a volunteer. I can professionally counsel the people in my community who need it. Or I can be an advocate for the people who can't advocate for themselves. Shockingly, I've even found an avenue in which I can use this new passion to even positively affect the company that I continue to work for - I've been asked to present "Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion" training to a very right-wing, conservative company. I cannot put into words what it means to be 39 years old and wake up and realize that I've been on the wrong track. But here it is - the right path. A meaningful path that I feel passionate about. I want to get up every day and find out how I'm going to be helping or contributing to my community today. In the past, I lived for work. Heck, there were literally weekends I lived AT work. But now I find myself living FOR my work. Whether I'm counseling the LGBTQIA+ community, advocating for them, planning events for them, or working with the LGBT center on how we can serve the community... I love what I'm doing. And being allowed to teach corporate America about my community has been a blessing as well. By obtaining first my associate's degree and then a bachelor's degree I'll have the education necessary to do even more good. And it's a gross understatement to say that I can't wait.

Mentor High School in Mentor, Ohio was Ohio's largest high school in terms of building size and population back in 1998. This isn't the case any longer. But at the time the sheer size and magnitude of the building and population had me considering alternatives. That's when I discovered the "Tech Prep" program as it was called back then. Having an aptitude for computers, I saw a program called "Computer Information Systems" in which you'd learn computer programming skills. The course was designed to get you a coding job straight out of high school, assuming you'd continue your education into college in some capacity. My Computer Concepts teacher, Mr. Mackey, was beyond thrilled to write me the necessary recommendation letter. Thus I was accepted. For my 11th and 12th grade years this meant I spent half about 2/3 of my day at Lakeland Community College in Kirtland, Ohio. I only came back to Mentor High School for 1 elective and then whatever required classes Lakeland couldn't accommodate. I discovered some very important things about myself during these two years. Foremost among them was that despite having a talent for coding... I loathed it. Straight A's in every assignment and project for two years plus going to national level coding contest for high schoolers looked good on paper. But I knew in my heart I couldn't do this for a living. I hated every moment of it. This didn't stop me from lettering in academics, however, and I graduated Mentor High School achieving my first 4.0 GPA in my senior year (being a 3.8 GPA average student generally). Upon graduation, I unknowingly started work at the company that would foster my 22 year career - Stahls' Transfer Express. After only 9 months of working in the company's call center, I was made a Team Lead. Over the next 21 years, I would hold several positions across leadership eventually becoming Department Manager of Customer Service then moving on to senior leadership where I would manage our full production facility, Shipping, Stock, Graphic Design, and more. I spent also spent two years managing our local Learning & Development department and assisting in Human Resources tasks. In the last year, our corporate parent company in Detroit has moved me up to their direct employ, as a Senior Learning & Development Specialist working specifically in leadership development and Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion strategies. However, in my spare time, I had begun to discover that I had another calling that was gradually becoming a bigger part of my life. I'd begun to work as a Suicide Prevention Counselor for The Trevor Project - the LGBTQIA community's largest suicide prevention service. Even though I only spent two nights a week doing this volunteer work I have discovered that it's more satisfying and meaningful than anything I'd done at Transfer Express over the last 22 years. And so I was inspired to go back to college for Social Work. By pursuing Social Work I can take any number of counseling paths that will lead me to opportunities in which I can actively do good for my community, which I love more and more each day. I realize that at 39 years old, I don't have as many years in me as a student of 18. But I choose to believe that my previous life experience gives me a perspective that other young counselors won't have. And it doesn't lessen my love and passion or the desire to genuinely do good for those around me.

I have chosen to go back to college and obtain a degree at 39 years old. I'm convinced that part of me really is crazy. Or perhaps I'm just a glutton for punishment. I've been with my employer for 22 years - since I was about 18 years old. I've climbed the corporate ladder from entry-level employee to senior management over the course of those 22 years. I sold my soul to the corporate entity and pursued this career as I felt like I was supposed to. That was until last year. A change within the company caused me to opt to leave senior management and reclaim my life. Since then I've found myself re-discovering what I want to do when I "grow up." This lead me to volunteer with The Trevor Project - the country's largest LGBTQ+ suicide and crisis prevention service. For 2.5 years I've been talking LGBTQ youth through their trauma and challenges and it's been the most impactful and meaningful work I've done in my life. For the first time in my life I've found work and a vocation that brings me fulfillment and happiness. Instead of selling my soul, I am giving freely of my strength and love and making a difference. This brings me back to the top... I've chosen to go back to school at 39 years old. And I'm pursuing Social Work. I've been a part of the LGBTQ community since I was 13 years old. Though, like most gay men, I could tell you that as early as 9 years old I knew I was different. I grew up in the age of The Rise of the Internet and the invention of the chat room. And online is where I found the LGBTQ community. Since then it's been my home. I love our community. I love the color, the love, the unabashed pride in who we are, and the fact that we're going to be us - like it or not. Our community is strong. We've been forced to be warriors. We are bullied and spoken down to and almost hunted from the day we accept ourselves. Under the rainbows, make-up, and bright smiles exists a layer of hurt... pain... rejection... loneliness. I know that I can make an impact in my community. And I can use Social Work to make that happen. My work with The Trevor Project has shown me that either through counseling or advocacy I can help to heal and bring my community back together. Whether through substance abuse counseling OR by choosing to be a school guidance counselor, I can help to bring fellowship, understanding, and a safe ear to my community. I am very sex-positive and kink-forward - I have spent a fair amount of the last 2.5 years helping people to understand who they and process what it means. Our community is so bright and colorful, but we relegate some of our feelings and actions to the shadow when they need not be. Let's bring these topics into the light and discuss them.

I am a busy guy. I waited until I was 39 years old to go back to college. So I'm working full time and have all my adult commitments on top of my school schedule. This includes being on 3 separate non-profit boards, being a Trevor Project Suicide Prevention Counselor, and representing the local LGBT community as Mr. Cleveland Leather Bear 2022 (which includes a lot of fundraising and charity work across northeast Ohio). I get to make an impact on leaders, young and old, in my community by being on the board for Leadership Lake County. I get to try and make Lake County a better place for my LGBT family by being on the board of LGBTQ+Allies Lake County. And I'm able to satisfy my love of history by being on the board of the James A. Garfield Alliance. And this is all in addition to all the other things that I do. Being this busy feels great to me - I'm happy with my life and the direction it is heading now after spending 20 years in the private sector. I'm pursuing my degree in Social Work so that I can make an even bigger positive impact upon my community. Having these goals and working towards them, as well as enjoying the opportunities afforded to me at this stage in my life, makes me genuinely happy for the first time in a long, long time. All of these things are the reasons why my mental health is important. Without a sound mental state, these goals could become hurdles instead. These things that I love that keep me busy could become frustrating and hinderances. Your emotional state can take your perspective and radically change it. Were I to allow myself to become stressed out and anxious, I could flake on commitments that are important to me and let down people who are counting on me. This is something I cannot allow to happen in my life. So to combat this I have several strategies. First, I have a therapist that I see regularly. I have believed, my entire adult life, that all people – even the most mentally healthy people – should go see a therapist. People don’t realize how valuable the viewpoint of an outside, unrelated party can be. She helps me to see my life through another lens and from another angle and ensures that I’m keeping things in perspective. In addition to the other things that I am, I am also occasionally co-dependent and prone to having a martyr complex. Therapy helps me keep those things in check. In addition to therapy, I also make sure to carve out time for myself during my hectic schedule. This can take the form of hiking through a park and doing some nature photography. A pursuit that allows me to focus on the quite beauty around me. Or it can take the form of antique hunting – I love carnival glass and am always hunting for something new and interesting. Antiques have stories to tell if we just listen for them. And I find that pursuit both relaxing and inspiring! Or lastly, “me time” can look like me inviting a friend or family member out to lunch or dinner to talk. I’m both ragingly extroverted and completely Italian. So food is meant to be a social exercise. And I love people. It’s taken me a lot of years to find this balance. But now that I have, and I’m mentally healthy, I’m finally happy with my life.

I serve on 3 different non-profit Boards of Directors: Leadership Lake County, The James A. Garfield Alliance, and LGBTQ+Allies Lake County. For Leadership Lake County, I have participated in several community events, including working with high school students in career counseling, as well as participating in "The Poverty Simulator" - an activity meant to educate teachers what generational poverty students experience and how it's different from other students. For the James A. Garfield Alliance, we raise up the mission of the James A. Garfield National Historic Site in my hometown of Mentor, Ohio. I served the National Park as tour guide, guest speaker, staff photographer, and social media specialist, all in a volunteer, unpaid capacity - hence being invited to join the board of their non-profit "Friends Group". And for LGBTQ+Allies Lake County I have participated actively in MANY fundraisers from bar events to fancy dinners to acting in a murder/mystery play fundraiser. I also assisted in planning our county's VERY FIRST Pride event this past June. In addition, I'm also a Suicide Prevention Counselor for The Trevor Project, the LGBT community's largest suicide prevention service in the United States. I've been a counselor for 2 years and generally work 1 or 2 shifts per week, 3 to 4 hours per shift and they're generally late hours, after work. My efforts within the LGBT community of Lake County have lead to me being asked to be involved in many other efforts as well. When our local health commissioner wanted a round table to understand LGBT health challenges in our community, I was one of the people he reached out to in order to put the round table together. I've also approached the VP of HR for the company I work for to begin putting together an LGBT Employee Resource Group within our company. I've brought LGBT concerns within the workplace to our leadership several times over the 21 years I've worked for the company and am seeking to carve out a space to make LGBT folks feel safe at work. Lastly, I recently won a contest that named me Mr. Cleveland Leather Bear 2022. This has made me even more visible in the Greater Cleveland LGBT community. Thus far for my title year I've raised money for several LGBT charities, include the Stonewall Softball League, the LGBT Center of Cleveland, PFLAG, GLSEN, and The Trevor Project. I've done this by attending bar events and educating folks on these charities and then taking donations or by selling things like jello shots and 50/50 raffle tickets whose proceeds all go towards the charity in question. I've used my title to secure a place as an event co-host at one of the local bars in particular and will be allowed to raise money on a regular monthly basis for a charity of my choosing, provided I plan and put together the event.

The night I came out to my parents, at 15 years old, was the first time I was ever truly afraid of my father. I'd known I was gay since I was 12 or 13. I'd even told some people at school at that point. But I knew my father wouldn't take the news well. And mom has been emotionally beaten down by him for years... she wasn't going to stand up for me either. The evening that I had admitted to being gay is one I'll never forget. Dad had found some incriminating evidence on my browser history. And you'll need to understand that this was the late 90's... the internet was still in its infancy, and I had no idea that a thing called a "history folder" existed... live and learn, right? Dad got falling-down-drunk that night. He screamed and yelled in ways that I'd never seen before. He called me every slur he could think of - at the top of his lungs. He ripped a plaque off our living room wall. It had a poem on it about how you get your last name from your father and how you should honor it and so forth... there was a heinous moment I was sure he was going to strike me with it. It was not a good experience. Since then, my father and I don't communicate about my sexuality or the men I date. He's not a part of my life in any meaningful way. When I got married in 2015, he wouldn't come to the ceremony. He DID come to the reception but didn't speak to anyone, didn't dress up, and in every picture taken he looks like he's sat on a tack. My mother and sister eventually came around though, thankfully, and have been my biggest supporters. Much to my father's consternation, I've gone on to own this part of me. I am a Trevor Project Suicide Prevention Counselor one or two nights a week. I am on the Board of Directors for LGBTQ+Allies Lake County. And I even assisted in planning our county's very first Pride celebration this June. And to cap that all off, I won the Mr. R&J Leather Bear Pride contest, thrusting me into the world of titleholders and charity fundraising... and I *LOVE* it. I have a successful career with a large manufacturer in the garment decoration industry. It's been twenty-one years with this employer - and I'm the first openly LGBT person to be a part of senior management. But I can safely say that this isn't my final destination. My work with my community taught me that I have a bigger purpose. So, at 39 years old I have returned to school to work towards my Bachelors in Social Work. The first stop is an Associates of Arts in General Studies. Then on to Youngstown State University for my Social Work degree. I want to serve my local LGBT community in Lake County, Ohio as a counselor. I have several ideas on specifically where I could end up, but first things first - education. The challenge to going back to school at my age is all the adult expenses that I already have. Car payment... mortgage... bills. As the kids say, the struggle is real. This is on top of the two other non profit boards I belong to and my weekly activities raising money for one LGBT charity or another due to my title. But I wouldn't change a thing. I'm finally starting the life I've always wanted.