Growing up I didn't have the support needed to combat my mental health disorders. As for many with a mental disorder it was difficult for me to trust those around me, believing that they did not have the best interest for me and only trusting those that were feeding into what I wanted. I began to fall into illegal activities and the 'friends' I was making were leading me to what I now see as further darkness. These were days that my mental health were most days at it's lowest and I was losing those that truly wanted to help me. To be frank, I did not think I was going to make it far enough to make it out of high school, let alone have a career. My faith in anything and everything was poor, so my belief in myself was shattered. Once I did get to that age I tried to push through and find a way just to feel like my mom was proud of me. But everyday I was drowning at an increasingly scary rate with no-one to lean on or help pull me through. Eventually it became so unbearable I was placed into a facility and was forced to take a break from school. Through this time I was able to become more grounded and find my true self. Where I once struggled with knowing what I wanted, trusting others, wanting to continue another day, I was excited to know what was to come next in my life, gained relationships that help build me and gained many strategies to handle my episodes. My personal faith in Jesus has grown, which has helped me to fight day in and day out. I still struggle with my mental disorder but I have learned to accept it and view it as just a part of me not a disability. With the skills I have gained I now want to use that to help the students that I will one day encounter. I never thought that there would come a day where I was excited to choose a career, study for a career, and just for life activities. The hard days are still very hard, and though I still experience my episodes I am now aware that they are not the end of me. It is just a harder day for me than for most, and I may experience it more than many, but if I am easier on myself on those days than the good days will feel great and not just a lucky chance that I don't feel the negative darkness on those days and should be. I now look at good things that happen to me that they ARE meant for me and the days that my mind begins to fight against me I now have a support system that is aware of my warning signs and are more than willing to be there for me in these times or hardships. Mental health disorders are best friends with no one, but I strive to be the support for those that need it just like I do.

To truly consider me for this scholarship, it's important to understand how it will assist me and the impact it will have on my journey. Receiving this scholarship will allow me to pursue a higher education, achieve financial maturity and establish consistency needed for my success. First and foremost, securing funding for higher education is essential for my academic and career aspirations. Attending the necessary courses will not only enhance my knowledge but also open the door to higher-paying job opportunities. A solid educational foundation will bring me closer to my desired career path, allowing me to focus on my future goals and responsibilities as I advance in life. Following this, gaining financial maturity is of high importance for me and my journey. Financial maturity to me means to reach a deep understanding of how to manage and control my money. With living paycheck to paycheck, as many do, the ability to gain financial maturity seems unattainable, especially with the added burden of funding higher education and trying not to accrue student loan debt. I am not one to buy herself nice things or go to nice places, I go to the thrift stores and coupon for my groceries, which still leaves little room for emergency funds. This scholarship would alleviate the financial strain of tuition, enabling me to focus on budgeting and saving, and potentially even investing. By building a stronger financial foundation, I can create a more secure future for myself and my family. In conclusion, consistency is the key to my success, and receiving this scholarship will support me in the ability to gain that consistency in both my education and my journey to financial maturity. Due to not having the means to fund school, I have had to take multiple breaks to try and save during my time off and explore alternative routes to cover the cost upon my return. This will enable me to maintain a steady academic path which leads to progress toward my career goals while allowing me to build my finances without unnecessary setbacks. This support will help me thrive in academics and financial management. It is disheartening realizing finances prevent many individuals from not attaining the education they need to achieve their goals. In conclusion, this scholarship would make a big difference in my journey by easing some of the financial stress I face. With this support, I can focus more on my studies and work towards my goals with more confidence. Thank you for considering my application.

Special education, a stigma that many students they have been branded with. Once given to them they suddenly begin to start looking down on themselves and thinking that their disability is stopping them form who and what they want to be. I want every child that I encounter to understand that their disability is not a limit on what they can do, it only means that they may need to do certain things differently than others, take different routes, and take more time in certain areas in life. This is what I believe Professor Harold Bloom was trying to describe in his quote. Their disability is not who they are. They are their own being defined by what they do and what they want to do, not the label of 'sped'. I hope to be able to guide my students into this understanding of themselves but giving them the tools that they need to begin to stand out in the light rather than feel they stand out because they are special in a negative context. Learning is not a narrow and straight path, there are different ways to understand and learn material but I believe the school system fails the children that don't grasp material in the way that majority do. One major key that I hope to help my students understand is that there is no shame in using the accommodations given to them, it is to help them succeed. Something they may not know is they may not be very different from successful people. There are many successful people that have came out and said they have learning disabilities, if all these people can do it, than they can do it too. We just need to meet our kids where they're at. Once upon a time there was a girl, named Aliyah, that lived in the land of dreams. She grew up knowing that all she wanted to do was to help kids. She wasn't sure how or in what way to get there, all she knew was that this is what she was made to do. So growing up all the work she would do always included working with the children and kids younger than her, learning the different behaviors and the tools needed to handle the behaviors and redirect the child. Well, as Aliyah was gaining more and more skills and insight on all the ways she would one day be able to help her future students, there was something dark happening in the back end and she had no clue. In the hidden valleys in the land of dreams, there was a hidden darkness that was lurking and trying to connive its way into the children's minds and make them to believe that they would amount to nothing. This darkness would creep in through videos, people, messages, anything and everything that can influence a child is how the darkness would fall through and reach its target. Then one night, in Aliyah's dreams the darkness tried to sneak it's way into her thoughts. Tried to convince her that she didn't have what it took to make the difference in the world and definitely not for the children that should would encounter and when she woke she thought nothing of it, until it began to present itself in so many areas of her life. That's when she knew she couldn't let this darkness win. When the school year began it was time for Aliyah to find this darkness head on, and she knew, if it's coming after me, it's coming after my students. First day of school and Aliyah knew for her kids to trust her she needed to be open, and she also needed to be lovingly stern. So, she made that who she was. She began by asking the students if any of them felt that they had a difficult time in school, then she asked if they felt like they had any support in or out of school, and then she began to tell them her journey during school and what she hopes to do for them. She told them how being in school she suffered from mental health issues and how it effected her schooling, she spoke about how much longer it would take her to understand material that her classmates would understand first time explained, how she would spend extra time on new ways to understand ideas and take extra time to practice while she was at home. She told them how she never felt like she would amount to much because school didn't come easily for her so how could anything else, and her students listened, they no longer saw an adult that was 'better than them' or 'trying to make them fail', they saw a teacher that understood them and wanted to help them get to where she was and more. Aliyah explained how before she got to her position that her students saw her in today that she took her time studying in trying to find different way for not just her to understand but the students she knows she will one day be teaching and guiding. The students began to have comfort in coming to Aliyah in times of need and crisis, whether it was school related or something more and the beautiful part about it was, other teachers were beginning to get more involved as well. Staff began to ask Aliyah what tools and insight she had for them that they can take into their own classrooms and how to have a rapport with not just some of the students but all of the students. Students began to feel more empowered with who they were and being more engaged with what their skills were even if it wasn't an academic subject. Having all the support and ability to understand themselves, their disability, not being pushed down and instead being lifted up, caused the darkness to go far from the land of dreams and never come back again and Aliyah was known as the hero who saved children's views of themselves.

Billie bosa nova, TV and six feet under. I was in a 6 year relationship that started when I was 15 years old and ended when I was 22. I grew with this person from my teenage years into early adult hood, and when the relationship was over when there was no particular reason as to why, it broke me. Billie bosa nova gives me the feeling of that exciting, beginning excitement of the relationship, the tempo and beat of the song make me feel nice and warm inside. It also makes me think of a time after my relationship when I was just trying to fool around with others in hopes that it would help me forget everything from my heart break. TV is a perfect depiction of how I felt towards the end of our relationship. I began to notice a shift but couldn't figure out what was happening, his need to be outside more and take his time alone and even when together not truly be together. I felt him slipping and there wasn't anything I can do to stop it from happening. Six feet under is the one that hurts the most because I don't only think of my lost romantic relationship, I think about the relationship I lost with my father too. With the romance I went through a time hoping that we'd find our way back to one another but also wondered if we were to if it would be worth it.. Would it be the same, or maybe even better? Or would it be worse since now we have this baggage and fear of it repeating. For my dad, it's the hope that one day he can be my father again, will I be able to be his little girl again? But there's no efforts coming from there, so should I be putting my efforts in? Or let it stay six feet under..?

I've known what I wanted to be since I was young, which was to be a teacher, but, my mom always wanted me to strive for something more. My grandmother on the other hand was always supportive of my decision even when I changed my mind time and time again, in trying to keep my mother happy, she was always right by my side. What I appreciate most about my grandmother during this time is, that even with every change she would always just ask me if it was what my heart yearned to do, and I believe she did it because she knew unless it was teaching the answer was no. She took her time to understand me why I felt I couldn't just stick to being a teacher and why I needed to experience other career options first. She would help me to realize that if I start something just because of someone else, even if I were to enjoy it, I would never be truly as happy if I had found it myself on my terms. Which is true. I began to notice with every major I began studying for, although I would be interested in some, I always had in the back of my mind what my experience would be studying to be a teacher and what if I disliked my current major just to end up a teacher. I even tried to have my major be in a different subject and just become a teacher using that but it just wasn't feeling right. Seeing how much stress it was causing me my grandma would speak to my mom from time to time and try to have her okay with me choosing my future and her having to just trust my desires and what God has for me. God is another reason why I am finally pursuing my studies in education. The encouragement and coincidences He put around me as I was starting to break out of the mold finally my mom wanted me to be in and to where He was leading me was relieving. Many people all my life, those I know and those I don't, would speak to me about how they would think I'd be a lovely teacher and thrive in the field. Now moving to a new state God has put me in an environment where I am surrounded by others who have a similar interest and are already in the path of where I see my future and where I hope it will one day be. Without God's encouragement and pushing to where I know both my mind and heart were truly at, I don't think I would be where I am today.