Developing friendships with girls always felt natural to me because, as a fellow girl, their world and experiences were something I could readily understand and relate to. However, conversing with boys was a different story altogether. I often found myself grappling with nervousness and discomfort around them. People around me, quick to offer explanations, would often say, "That means you like him," presuming that my unease indicated romantic interest. Yet, I couldn't quite fathom why I never felt at ease around boys. "That means you want him to like you," they'd insist, attributing my discomfort to a desire for male approval. But I questioned the intensity of this yearning and why it seemed to haunt me so persistently. The unease I felt in the presence of boys was something I deeply despised. As time passed, a disheartening reality gradually unfolded before me: societal respect and validation often seemed to be tethered to the presence of a male companion. To conform to this societal expectation, I consciously sought out male affection, which brought about a noticeable change in how I was perceived by my classmates, especially other girls. This charade continued, but my true yearning wasn't for validation from a boy; it was, in fact, the validation of my female peers that held far more significance for me. To my heart and soul, no compliment from a man could ever rival the praise and acknowledgment bestowed upon me by my female friends. This realization was pivotal in explaining why I felt like a different person around men. It was during this time of self-reflection and soul-searching that I came to a profound understanding of my own identity—I liked girls. This newfound clarity about my sexual orientation and attraction to women was genuinely liberating. However, my journey didn't end there; it merely took a new direction. Simply liking women was not deemed sufficient by society's standards. The absence of a romantic interest in a man led to others perceiving me as somehow incomplete or inadequate, and this perspective was deeply ingrained in the judgments of those around me. I endured the unwarranted and objectifying gazes of entitled individuals, which seemed to taint every conversation and interaction I had with my peers. I couldn't openly discuss my relationships without them being reduced to mere sexual subjects of discussion. The notion that others had the power to perceive me that way, even within the confines of a classroom, deeply unsettled me. Earning genuine respect in predominantly heterosexual environments was a daunting task that required immense courage. However, throughout this journey, my sense of self remained unshaken. I vehemently resented being objectified and reduced to my sexual preferences, but I staunchly refused to compromise my identity for the comfort of others. It became evident that I would only be truly seen if I stopped accommodating myself to fit others' expectations. Regardless of the potential backlash, I came to a resolute understanding that there was absolutely nothing wrong with loving a woman, and I was determined to stand firm in my identity in all spaces, even within the confines of an educational institution.

The funding I would receive with this scholarship would be put towards obtaining my undergraduate degree in psychobiology. I plan on specializing in psychobiology to gain a more scientifically backed understanding of the brain. This specter of psychology focuses on how our mental health directly impacts our physical health. I hope to bring more awareness and provide an answer for those who are looking to understand themselves. I would then continue my education by studying psychology in my graduate years with an emphasis on forensics. Once I have finished my schooling I hope to work for the FBI and help the criminals that need the most psychiatric help. Working for the government I will advocate for the mental health of inmates who wish to change and fight for a change in the treatment of past felons. Current rates of incarceration are tremendously high, racial prejudice is present now more than ever, and the government does not do enough to keep past inmates out of the system. I hope to make people feel better about themselves, make them prideful in their story and truly be committed to growing as people. I hope to relieve inmates of self-hate that has been fostered within due to years of an oppressive system, and cultural values. I hope to bring mental care to all.

I began playing in fifth grade. Since then volleyball has consumed my life, it was all I did and it was the only thing I knew myself as. Now 17, I have had the privilege to experience the extremities to which this sport can push you. Skill can be successfully harnessed but consistency and execution lie within the hands of the player and their passion for the game. Passion grows from motivation, and motivation is fragile. It can be lost just as easily as it was gained. Above all motivation and passion more often than not come from teammates and coaches that believe in your ability to succeed. To truly be a good player you must be confident in your ability before all else. Volleyball has taught me the beauty in making mistakes, it has taught me the power of my actions. The beauty of this sport lies in its versatility, a good player is selfish but humble, and a good player is confident but not cocky. A good player is intelligent, this sport is highly competitive and calls for so much self-motivation, calls for courage, calls for strength in the eyes of your coaches when you just can't seem to do what they need you to. It calls for strength when you feel like you have let your team down, let yourself down and it seems like there is nothing else you can do. It’s difficult knowing that even when you have played your best, tried your best, and done everything in your power to contribute to the game, there will always be someone who did it better. Volleyball has taught me to appreciate my skill, my agility and my strength even when I am the only one who notices it. Volleyball has taught me to love myself. It has taught me the power of a smile, and a high five. Volleyball is a multi-dimensional sport, the game lives within me, and it teaches me the power of my voice and the power of communication. Pursuing my volleyball career in college, I will take this mindset with me, I will encourage mistakes, and I will encourage failure. Failure is what has made me a good volleyball player, and anyone passionate in this sport can say failure is the only way to improve as a player. Volleyball proves that love sometimes isn't enough, loyalty is all that matters in the end. I love this sport, but I would have quit years ago if I was not loyal, As mentally draining as this sport is, I love it and I am loyal to myself. I know that in college I will be loyal to myself and to what I want