I experienced my first anxiety attack at 3 years old. At the time, I did not know it was an anxiety attack; I thought everyone cried to the point of hyperventilating when their mom left them in the car to lock the front door. It would take 12 years for me to realize that it isn't normal for my nervous system to fight against me every day.
In my mind, our second-story apartment became a death trap in those two minutes my mom left to lock the door. Despite living higher, I still agonized over my family being robbed. I would hold my breath and listen for the sound of someone trying to break our windows. I did not live in a violent neighborhood; my elementary school was blue-ribbon awarded, my parents loved each other, yet I lived in a near-constant state of fear. My anxiety caused me to become very observant at a young age, and my observations brought hundreds of questions. My parents quelled many of my anxieties (and saved their sanity) by presenting me with books and a library card. By age eight, I was very confident that my mother would not be mugged in broad daylight by one of the neighbors we'd known for half a decade, and I learned the odds of being robbed in a second-story apartment were low. But with age and understanding came two new sources of anxiety: ostracization and insecurity.
Though literature did (and still does) bring me comfort, my awkward, theatrical demeanor made other kids wary of me. Everyday a new trait of mine seemed to disgust them. I made one or two friends, but I was always waiting for things to go wrong. By fifth grade, the only people I felt accepted by were my teachers, so I decided that I should put all my focus on academics. My new life goals were finish fifth grade with a perfect 4.0, get into a magnet middle school, earn a cumulative 4.0, get into a magnet high school, graduate early, and get a full academic scholarship to college. Fifth grade was also when I had my first panic attack. I won a competition and got to read my essay in front of the entire grade. This should've been a moment of jubilation and pride. Performing on stage was familiar, but now I had no character to hide behind. The more I read, the worse my writing sounded. I felt guilty for beating my friend; the entire auditorium was staring at me, and even my teachers were whispering. Then I couldn't see, I panicked, and read from memory. Then I couldn't breathe. I thought I was going to die on stage. Finally, I returned to my class, there were fewer eyes, and my heart unclenched. I could breathe again. My vision returned, but I felt like a ghost for the rest of the day.
Throughout middle school and high school, I continued to obsess over my academics. I made a few friends who were fellow anxious nerds, but they had access to therapy and healthcare. I did not. I did not question my need to check my grades every class period. I did not think it was odd to calculate my gpa and my prospective cumulative gpa at twelve. I had my second panic attack in 7th grade after staying up until 4 am trying to get a perfect score on a math assignment. I did not hesitate to deny myself sleep, food, and water. Caffeine became most of my diet. I ignored the daily anxiety attacks and random heart palpitations. Self-harm seemed like a natural consequence for any academic blunders. My only focuses were making my parents proud, impressing my teachers, and earning grades that would grant me an academic scholarship. As a result, I lost weight, took more sick days because I was sleep-deprived to the point of being too dizzy to stand, missed assignments, and was so sleep-deprived that I misread the fine print on the scholarship I did earn.
I briefly had access to therapy last year, and my therapist confirmed I had all of the symptoms of an anxiety disorder, but I have yet to be given an official diagnosis. My anxiety allowed school to consume me, caused me to alienate myself before others could ostracize and left me paralyzed with fear of the world without allowing myself to experience it. I've been clean of self-harm for a year and four months, but I still have anxiety attacks and panic attacks, monthly now instead of weekly. My hope is that in college, I will continue to perfect my coping strategies and allow my planning and foresight to become tools for my success and not instruments of my destruction.