To encourage those around me, I strive to be my authentic self at all times. I am open, vulnerable, and honest. I show others that who they are is defined by them, by earnestly defining myself. By opening up about my mental health challenges and accomplishments, I promote a non-judgmental environment of self-reflection and self-awareness. I laugh at my mistakes and am honest about my emotions. The world can be cold and disconnected, especially with social media flaunting people's "best" sides. Comparisons are inevitable in such an environment, so no matter who I am with, I try to show that it is okay to be your genuine, imperfect self. By setting this example and allowing for this sense of openness, people often feel more comfortable and accepted, which in turn augments their confidence. I have also witnessed far too much negativity that is detrimental to everyone involved. To counteract this negativity, I always praise my friends for their accomplishments, especially the smaller, unnoticed ones. I love to hype up my friends by reminding them of their unique traits and skills, the obstacles they have overcome, and the ways that they light up my life. I prioritize consistently reminding others of their value since it isn't always easy to remember or see it in yourself.

One of the hardest lessons I have learned recently is how to ask for help. I used to pride myself on simply not needing much help throughout my life. I thought that my fierce independence was a strength, as I failed to recognize the weakness that comes with doing everything for yourself and for others. Despite fluctuating mental health, I have always known one thing to be true - I am a genuinely good friend. I always prioritize my friends and family members, and would drop anything to help them if they are ever in need. I don’t ask for help - I am the helper. That is, until I was in a serious car accident that left me severely concussed and unable to take care of myself this past summer. The pain was so intolerable that I could not even feel guilt for asking for help - I needed it. I was so physically unwell that there was no possible way I could take care of myself without it. The hard part came later, as I was slowly recovering from the immense toll my body took that rainy summer day. I was so isolated by the concussion, which prevented me from leaving the house or engaging in social encounters, due to hypersensitivity to light and noise. Although I could finally take care of myself, I couldn’t go to classes, hang out with my friends, go to work, or do anything I genuinely enjoyed without intense pain. The trauma from the accident built upon my pre-existing depressive disorder and sent me into a deep depressive episode. The ease of asking for help the first time was gone, as people were expecting me to be “myself” again. It took weeks of breakdowns, panic attacks, and failing to eat, shower, or even brush my teeth for me to consider asking for help. It became even harder once I started; I reached out and discovered that help wasn’t really available. I made phone calls, scoured the internet, and begged my doctors, but no one could find me a therapist or any sort of mental health support. With COVID-19, therapists are in very high demand and the wait-lists are endless. Out of desperation, I conquered my newfound fear of driving and tried, unsuccessfully, to check myself into a mental hospital. Finally, I shifted my mindset to focus on the strength of recognizing my struggle and started to advocate for myself. It wasn’t until I was loud and clear, declaring that I NEEDED help, that I was finally able to get enrolled in an intensive outpatient therapy program and get it. I learned so much from the program about myself and my health, but most importantly, I had learned to ask for help, advocate for myself, and recognize that asking for help is not a sign of weakness. In fact, it is a strength to recognize when help is warranted. Asking for help requires humility and self-awareness, and it is illogical to perpetually avoid it when you could be so much better off with the support of those around you. This experience has contributed to my advocacy for mental health care and health care reformation, while also honing my self-awareness and humility. I have learned that I don't need to be the helper in every situation, and I am finally capable of asking for help or support in any environment without the shame I once carried.