Ever since I could remember, I have always been interested in the arts. I was raised in a low-income household with loving and supportive parents who always encouraged me to pursue my passions. Because my parents struggled financially, I was never able to receive lessons or attend after-school programs until I received scholarships to fund them during my high school years. Coming from a disadvantaged background, being able to earn these experiences very much deepened my appreciation for the arts. Through this stepping stone, I was able to find passion and meaning in my life, and it was only through art that I discovered how to turn my weaknesses into strengths. Venturing through the realm of extracurriculars, I found myself drawn closer to music-related activities. Recognizing that music was such a flexible and unique form of expression, I started to become more aware of the relationships between music and other disciplines. With a growing passion, I got more involved with performances which awoke a new world in my eyes. I fell in love with the invisible connection between myself, the performers, and the audience, as we were all engaged with one another through the phenomenon of rhythm. With such weight and fragility, I became fixated on the construction of music and decided to pursue music composition. Attending a music conservatory to earn a music degree was never received well by my friends and relatives. The low demand and pay in many jobs pertaining to the arts speak for themselves. Despite this fact, I continue forward, well aware of what I want in my life. Having a career in the arts is important to me personally because of how impactful it has been throughout my life. In moments of desperation, depression, and discouragement, music has empowered me to rejuvenate the lives around me through the love I give that goes beyond my passion for art. It is a transparent string that connects individuals and births harmony amongst those who initially had no bond. Art is also a message that reaches the hearts of those across different disciplines, interests, and languages. The arts hold such a special place in everyone’s life. For many, it is expression or release, but for me, it was a transformation in attitude, a change in perspective. During one of the darkest moments in my life, I contemplated suicide, and all it took was one man to bend my view on negative emotions, revealing their beauty instead. In 2016, a remarkable Japanese ice skater by the name of Yuzuru Hanyu gave a performance over a graceful piano composition. Captivated by every move, I could see through his choice of expression that such a heartfelt piece had been interpreted in a personal way. His distinct translation into ice skating felt so raw and inspired me to pursue music in hopes that I can uplift and inspire others in their own unique way as Hanyu did for me. The deep impact of art, which I believe is a healing medium that connects us as humans, can uplift and bring us inner peace. Having experienced such a significant resolution, I am pursuing art for the sake of making a unique difference in the lives of others.

Tick tock. Click clack. Plip plop. Tsk tsk. The clock ticked slowly but loudly as I averted my attention away from the lecture in class. I listened intently to the thump of my heart that too click clacked or plip plopped as the clock on the wall did. In contrast to the free flicks of time passing by, my chest felt distressingly blue. Holding onto every light I could scavenge in times of misery, it would soon fail to sustain my emptiness if it had not been for my childhood friend who gave me a reason to be the light I needed. Her golden locks flowed through the wind like her contagious confidence that naturally spilled into any room she walked into. She always saw the doom and gloom as an unnecessary projection and influenced me to believe the same. After all, what good comes out of  being negative? Tick Tock. Click clack. Plip plop. Tsk tsk. Tears escaped her eyes and fell onto her desk as she silently stared into the abyss of the white wall across the room. Each drop thumped like the roar of thunder. Shack shack. I quickly turned to face her. Crash crash. I didn’t need to know why she was in such a state. Splash splash. But what I did know was that she needed a hand. Prick prick. A match to light that fire that once flourished, the blazing phoenix.  Adding positivity and happiness into one’s life takes willpower and persistence with the reward of selfless purpose. Throughout my life, I have learned that one simple compliment can make a person’s day. Lifting the spirits of others has never failed to bring me happiness in return, and sharing positivity has been my secret to healthy optimistic thinking.

My first visit to the art museum was filled with fear, curiosity, and attachment towards this strangely realistic sculpture. He was a real man. A calm soul who leaned against the wall for support. With a monotone expression that lay across his face, the man dragged victims into gazing his way. I stared at his towering figure and became captivated by his lingering charm at first sight. As a victim, I have firsthand knowledge of this sorcery, and I implore you to fall headfirst into what he has in store for you. Every year, each class takes a field trip to the Milwaukee Public Art Museum to admire and become inspired by artwork upon inspection. There were all sorts of notable paintings, sculptures, and even poems. However, none would ever compare to Duane Hanson’s sculpture of a janitor simply titled Janitor (1973). This fiberglass figure depends on a wall or harness to stay upright, and despite the aging and restoration, the Janitor still maintains a fascinating specimen. This work of art is my favorite simply because of the connection I built over the years of my visits to the art museum. Whichever room this sculpture resided in, the eyes of every visitor would lock on even as they walked away. The Janitor truly leaves everyone baffled by the unexpected amount of detail on a man with a profession that is rarely noticed. As of today, the Janitor has been moved out of the Milwaukee Public Museum, where I first laid eyes on his natural form. With a strong bond throughout my years of gazing, this compelling sculpture maintains its place as my favorite piece of art.

Transitioning from a predominantly white middle school to an arts high school that was predominantly black has got to be the strangest shift in my life. Despite my middle school having a relatively decent diversity rate, nothing compared to my high school where whites became the minority. Race alone was not the only drastic difference that I noticed when comparing both environments. The attitudes and spirit that the students carried were high and bold. In contrast to that, most students at my Middle School were quite passive and safe. You could say it was a culture shock. I never realized just how real these types of students were. Amazing dancers of different body shapes, sizes, and colors. Artists with interesting personalities and stylistic interests. Musicians who can play five instruments or even perform with top artists. Writers and actors that could break the crowd into silence and tears. This salad of students opened my eyes to a whole new world of people who positively added to my own person. Hearing about different types of people is not the same as being amongst them and my four years at this high school taught me to never judge a book by its cover. You never know what great things come from someone who looks different from you.

Listening to Slipknot’s song Psychosocial every single day was not a great influence on my mental health as a growing student. I became that child who despised every single person on Earth just from a couple of dreadful interactions and the influence of the world hating song. Who knew that the negative energy I carried would end up creating positive intentions right during my first ever piano performance in 7th grade? Indulging my time with this instrument and taking the first step to share my gift birthed the beginning of my musical journey. The stage lights outlined my figure, my back hunched over the keyboard, and the sound of a note bouncing into the audience. A pulsating tempo in my chest. This strange flow of energy and the tingling sensation in my body. I could feel it all. The noteworthy experience of a pleasurable high at that moment. It was like the audience and I were one. After my fingers stopped and I exited the stage, my peers walked up to me crying and the teachers faced me with a face of astonishment. My young love for show and tell blossomed and I had found meaning in music through such a phenomenal awakening. I did not want to spread the hatred of Psychosocial, but instead I wanted to embrace the art of feeling and the bittersweet experiences we will all find love in. The hatred I once felt vanished like dust and the desire to share only grew. Showing those in desperation that they were not alone through the art of music became the constant burning desire in my heart. When performing on stage, even if my initial intention was not to make students cry, my execution had enough impact to generate tears. Although Slipknot had created a negative change in me, they also created a positive change that I began to pursue. I take this experience with me, hoping to grow through college and beyond. This once newfound meaning is taken in the right direction where it will flourish. Being a musician who strives to become a composer, artistically, I have desired to bring connection and understanding among people through my craft. My personal goal, which has greatly stemmed from being a musician, aims to overall bring awareness to accepting and embracing the constant change in our lives through the art of communicative listening. Everyone is going through something and only by listening to one another will we get from one place to another. As a universal language, music knows no bounds. Through the cultural differences, customs, and language barriers, music brings us together.