Growing up my parents were extremely religious and forced it upon me. When I was a kid I had always felt wrong, I didn't know what it was at the time, I just felt inaccurate. People expected me to act and behave one way and I couldn't understand why. I got into trouble at school for doing things other kids did, I was an abomination to society. I was different, weird, and wrong. When I was in middle school I began to put my feelings into questions, questions that no one could answer. Questions about who I was and why I was feeling the way I did. Things that seemed like normal and natural questions to me, that others would be confused and taken aback by. I read many religious texts that never answered my questions and asked many of my religious leaders who would tell me to pray, something I did so much to figure out why I was so different. After joining the debate team I learned the importance of having multiple sources and looking at things from every angle. Due to this, I decided to branch out and see what else was out there and why I felt so wrong.
Years of researching later and not accepting the answer and myself, I finally realized that I was transgender. I suppressed this knowledge for years. This led to severe mental illness, isolation, and loss of who I was as a person. When I finally accepted who I am and wanted to tell others the reaction I had was harsh. Many could not see why I would “choose” this and refuse to acknowledge me, bully me, or simply cut me out of their lives. My mental health took a major toll and I was in one of the worst places mentally in my life thus far. My parents tried to fix me by sending me to therapy and forcing me to go to religious camps. My religious leaders prayed for me that this would go away and that my identity would disappear. I decided to abandon my religion and live a more agnostic way in light of how I was treated. I could never support a community that was so against me as a person. After the harsh reaction and rejection of those closest to me, I had I felt isolated and alone with no one to turn to, my own parents were disgusted with me, my friends had left, and even my therapist rejected me. After having everything I had known stripped away from me I began to find strength within myself and my identity, developing my being and who I wish to become.
Just when I thought I had things figured out my parents kicked me out weeks before my high school graduation. The tension of my existence was too much for my dad and told me that I needed to stop corrupting my younger siblings. My existence was too confusing and wrong for anyone to understand. I got in a huge fight with my dad when he told me to leave and after years of resentment and suffering, I decided enough was enough. I walked out of my house with the intent to end my life, not for the first time but hopefully the last. I called my best friend to leave a voicemail and tell him goodbye. He picked up the phone, I was not expecting him to be up so late and I broke down crying. He came and picked me up and got me through that night, then the next and the next. This has been a huge life event that has tested me in so many ways. Don't get me wrong this has been one of the hardest times of my life. However, through doing this I have developed more as a person than I ever thought I could. I have proven my resilience and developed my character.
This was the hardest thing I have ever done and probably ever will do but I am so glad I did it because even though I am rejected by friends and family, peers and teachers, and everyone in between I am happier than I have ever been in my entire life and am ecstatic to live on my own and find out more about who I am as a person. This is why I will never stop fighting for my right to exist, never back down from a challenge, will always stand up for what is right, and never expect people to conform to my beliefs or anyone else's. I don't know where I would be right now without those closest to me and who I would be without surviving my mental health challenges. Certainly not on the path to pursuing my dreams of becoming a veterinarian.
Animals have always been a huge part of my life and will always continue to be. I love animals and wish that all could live a full and healthy life. I wish to obtain my Doctorate in Veterinary Medicine. With it, I hope to be able to work with all types of animals. I especially want to work with aquatic and wild animals as well as dogs and cats. I desire to contribute to the conservation and preservation of all species of animals, particularly those that are on the verge of extinction. I hope to be that help, one more person in the fight against the extinction, of pandas, elephants, sharks, rhinoceros, whales, turtles, and many more species. On a community level, I would also like to help with dogs, cats, bunnies, and any other household pets or livestock animals. It is important to me to make a difference on both a local and global level, as I want to make an impact on both individuals and their families, as well as on the global ecosystem in the best way I can. I desire to help animals and our ecosystem, all through the practice of veterinary medicine.