As an undergraduate student at 31 years of age, I’ve not only had my fair share of personal mental health struggles, but I’ve seen how untreated mental health issues can ravage the life of a person and the closest people around them. The effects that come from trauma and turmoil sprout roots that continue to spread and crack foundations unless those very roots are treated and cared for. And though the solution seems easy, it’s very tough to recognize one’s own deteriorating mental health. Growing up without a father and yet still having to watch my mother deal with domestic violence. When my brother left to join the infantry, I never expected that he’d come back a different person, yet somehow still my brother. Moments such as when we arrived at the scene of a car crash and realized that my little sister had lost her father at the age of 5, yet she still managed to comfort my mom with hugs and by reassuring her that “we’ll be okay.” The death of a cousin at the hands of suicide. It’s moments like those from my own life and the people I love that help drive the passion I have for mental health awareness and advocacy. I see not only my family, but the faces of the people all around me that must have dealt with similar heartbreaks yet, just like most of us, silent on any issue concerning mental health out of fear of being ridiculed or even worse, blamed. As a nurse I plan to ensure not only the proper care of people dealing with mental health issues, but also that they are treated with the respect that every person deserves. As a nursing student who has done clinical, I’ve heard and seen hospital staff disrespect and disregard patients just because “they’re regulars and don’t want help.” In those moments I did what I could for the patient and spoke up when appropriate, and hope that by doing so people will begin to question their behaviors and biases towards people who have mental health struggles. On the streets, I try to smile at and converse with people I encounter on my way and those busking or asking for change. Sometimes it's talking, other times I provide food or blankets as possible. I realize that those people are often judged and avoided, though their circumstances could be ours in the blink of an eye. Not every person on the street was lead there by drugs and/or alcohol. A lot of them are there because they have not received the appropriate help for reasons that, in the moment, don’t make a difference. It doesn’t matter why the person is there, what matters is that we treat them as a person and if so moved, what we can when we can. Often times we can make a difference in someone’s life with conversation. It's the simple acknowledgment of one’s existence that has the power to elevate and alleviate.

Being a non-traditional college student shouldn't only be seen through the clouds of age. When I realized at the age of 29 that I wanted to return to school to pursue nursing, I was met with both negativity and deterrence from a few people around me (myself included), and positivity and encouragement. I knew that making such a drastic life change would be difficult, but it would be necessary in order to get to where I wanted to in life. At the time, I thought that it was the change that I feared, but instead it was the possibility of failure that kept me wide-eyed. Nonetheless, I made up my mind to take a chance on myself. As I began to place a plan into motion, the steps seemed to get shorter and the incline a bit less. I realized heading into this new chapter of my life that like a game of chess, it's a bit easier to succeed when aware of the possibilities. It is through chess that I learned that it is not only that one must remain constantly aware of their surroundings and of the possibilities that exist, but that premeditated action must be taken in order to increase the chances of success. For it is through these taken chances that we are given a greater and wider world view. To be a nurse, the world must be viewed through a lens of compassion and understanding. A lens with a strength to match the clear, up-close views that nurses get at humanities pains and triumphs. Growing up, I knew that helping people is what I wanted to do. When my grandma would get sick, I'd be up early to make sure she was okay. Though young, I would help with getting her cups of tea or coffee, food and medicine. Now, en-route to becoming a nurse practitioner and CRNA, I wish my grandma could see me. My goal is to help our community the way I wish I could've helped my grandma. A community that is beautiful and strongly cohered, yet has been riddled with poor health stemming from the inability to afford healthcare. As a nurse practitioner, I plan to offer free healthcare services to our border community to those who cannot afford to visit a doctor's office. I would also like to offer harm reduction services to members of our community who struggle with substance use disorder. In a country as great and prosperous as ours, not one person should go without having the ability to receive compassionate healthcare. Just as in a game of chess, I've taken a good look at who and what surrounds me. I've done all I can to plan ahead in order to ensure my survival on this path to becoming a healthcare worker. I've considered that what-ifs; what if i don't pass this class or what if my next move lands me in between a Rook and hard place? But also, what if I graduate top of my class or save a life? I've thought of as much as I could and have tried to prepare accordingly. But alas, we never truly know life's next move. When I look around and see all these different faces, all I could think is that we are all someone's child. Just kids who had to grow up and try to figure life out. I'll never pretend to have it figured out - life and all it encompasses, but I'm certain that my desire to help people will forever be a piece of the puzzle that makes me, me.

Like many people on this earth, I spent a lot of time doing work that I didn't enjoy simply as a means to put food on the table for my family. Now, 12 years post high school graduation, I find myself finally en route to living out what I would call my purpose - helping people live a healthier, more comfortable life. Though, to say that my only motive to become a nurse is to help people does not accurately describe my reasoning. There have been a few people in my life that either encouraged me to pursue my dreams or who could have benefited from my becoming a nurse practitioner. For years after high school, I worked and did well in what I set out to do. Work was fine, and sometimes fun, but often times I found myself unmotivated to wake up in the mornings. I just wasn't doing what made me feel good inside. From a young age, the inner joy that would fill me up was apparent any time I found myself able to help someone. The truth may be that my desire to help others is nothing more than a selfish act on my part simply because it feels so good. If acts of kindness and compassion go a long way in brightening someone's day, I imagine that providing healthcare with that same caring mentality would provide that much more for people. It excites me because by providing quality healthcare to people, you bring comfort and joy to not only those who must endure personally, but to their loved ones as well. The blanket of care that a nurse can provide comes in many shapes and sizes, with each having the opportunity to bring warmth to those who may be at their coldest. Though the desire to help others stems from within, the courage it takes to completely overhaul my life doesn't come without encouragement from those around me. From my mother and siblings to my daughter and RN wife, I have been cheered on and supported every step of the way. More intimately, I think of my grandma and what she went through when I need encouragement to continue onward. My grandma passed away due to complications from diabetes, though that is not the whole story. For years my grandma would see her doctor and complain about the same pain over and over again. I couldn't tell you if it was negligence or ignorance, but my grandma was repeatedly brushed off until it was too late. I understand that patients pile up and work becomes stressful, but this job we sign up to do shouldn't be done if one can no longer provide the best care possible. Every patient deserves to be heard and treated with compassion, just as one would expect their own loved ones to be treated. I aim to provide the type of care that my grandma should have had. Hard work, care, and compassion are all necessary traits to become a successful nurse. Often times, these motivations manifest from the desire to help others or from the anger and pain that arises when watching loved ones wither away and fall to this world’s ugliest diseases. As I look around at our current state of affairs in this world, I know this; as humanity continues to evolve and break new grounds, one thing is for certain; nurses will be needed more than ever.

Like many people on this earth, I spent a lot of time doing work that I didn't enjoy simply as a means to put food on the table for my family. Now, 12 years post high school graduation, I find myself finally en route to living out what I would call my purpose - helping people live a healthier, more comfortable life. Though, to say that my only motive to become a nurse is to help people does not accurately describe my reasoning. There have been a few people in my life that either encouraged me to pursue my dreams or who could have benefited from my becoming a nurse practitioner. For years after high school, I worked and did well in what I set out to do. Work was fine, and sometimes fun, but often times I found myself unmotivated to wake up in the mornings. I just wasn't doing what made me feel good inside. From a young age, the inner joy that would fill me up was apparent any time I found myself able to help someone. The truth may be that my desire to help others is nothing more than a selfish act on my part simply because it feels so good. If acts of kindness and compassion go a long way in brightening someone's day, I imagine that providing healthcare with that same caring mentality would provide that much more for people. It excites me because by providing quality healthcare to people, you bring comfort and joy to not only those who must endure personally, but to their loved ones as well. The blanket of care that a nurse can provide comes in many shapes and sizes, with each having the opportunity to bring warmth to those who may be at their coldest. Though the desire to help others stems from within, the courage it takes to completely overhaul my life doesn't come without encouragement from those around me. From my mother and siblings to my daughter and RN wife, I have been cheered on and supported every step of the way. More intimately, I think of my grandma and what she went through when I need encouragement to continue onward. My grandma passed away due to complications from diabetes, though that is not the whole story. For years my grandma would see her doctor and complain about the same pain over and over again. I couldn't tell you if it was negligence or ignorance, but my grandma was repeatedly brushed off until it was too late. I understand that patients pile up and work becomes stressful, but this job we sign up to do shouldn't be done if one can no longer provide the best care possible. Every patient deserves to be heard and treated with compassion, just as one would expect their own loved ones to be treated. I aim to provide the type of care that my grandma should have had. Hard work, care, and compassion are all necessary traits to become a successful nurse. Often times, these motivations manifest from the desire to help others or from the anger and pain that arises when watching loved ones wither away and fall to this world's ugliest diseases. As I look around at our current state of affairs in this world, I know this; as humanity continues to evolve and break new grounds, one thing is for certain; nurses will be needed more than ever.

Like many people on this earth, I spent a lot of time doing work that I didn't enjoy simply as a means to put food on the table for my family. Now, 12 years post high school graduation, I find myself finally en route to living out what I would call my purpose - helping people live a healthier, more comfortable life. As humanity continues to evolve and break new grounds, one thing is for certain; nurses will be needed more than ever. This is one of the reasons that I wish to pursue a degree in nursing. Healthcare will forever be a necessity for humanity, and by choosing to lend myself to this profession, I feel that I can bring light and hope to those who may be having a hard time finding it themselves. To enable myself to provide the best possible care to my community, I also plan on pursuing a graduate degree in nursing. During the pandemic and even now, years after, we have seen swaths of reports on how nurses are struggling with burnout and have or are strongly considering a career change. As a single body, it would be foolish to think that I alone could bring relief to the current state of affairs we find ourselves in. But, I ground myself in knowing and believing that others are out there who feel the same as I do and have or will decide to become a nurse. I've seen firsthand what lack of healthcare can do to people. I've known good people that died young because they couldn't afford to get the healthcare they needed. Even worse, people whom were neglected by their providers for reasons never stated and rarely understood. This is where I see myself stepping in to provide for my community. First, as a RN in a hospital's critical care unit, then as a nurse practitioner. With my goal being to acquire multiple certificates as a nurse practitioner (FNP, PNP, PMHNP) including becoming certified to administer anesthesia as a CRNA, I aim to give back to the community that has provided ample opportunity to me by providing care free of charge to those who need it most. With an aging population will come an increased need for nurses and healthcare works overall, and I hope to provide some relief to this dilemma. Likewise, as the years pass, life itself seems to become more fragile and significantly more expensive. These are issues that, with grace and knowledge, can be resolved one case at a time. By applying myself to my studies and taking an oath to provide people with the absolute best care I could possibly provide, I stare down the future not with fear, but with the hope and pride in knowing that I can and will make a difference.

Recently, I woke up one morning to the winds howling and the temperatures in the teens. I dreaded dragging myself out of bed, knowing that in a couple of short hours I'd be outside in the elements, working before the sun even gets a chance to rise. I couldn't believe how deflated I felt. Up to that point I had dedicated a lot of time to climb up the ladder in the construction industry. I went from being a laborer for what felt like a century, to becoming a heavy equipment operator and soon after a superintendent. I felt good for a couple of years but started feeling that hunger to better myself again. So earlier this year I decided to take a 7-week course to obtain my CDL. I managed to run through the course in 5 weeks and received my CDL on the first try. It felt great having set out to do something and then exceeding my expectations. I found employment soon after and my employer is putting every skill I have to work. Which is great, until I realized that meant using every year of experience I had under my belt using a shovel as well. Snap back into the present, and you could understand the confusion surrounding my current situation. The feeling of accomplishment hasn't lasted, and I believe that's mainly to do with the fact that I just don't like what I do for a living. As a child I had several interests, several things I envisioned myself doing as a grown-up. Construction was not one. One of my high school teachers once told me that I would make a great doctor, and every once in a while, I could hear her encouragement; though every year a little more faint. And now, with less than 12 months before turning 30, I've finally built up the courage to make a drastic change. I've always loved the feeling that helping another person brings. I'm naturally very caring for people and find myself wanting to extend a helping hand to anyone I can, whenever I can. My wife recently became a BSN RN and the growth and confidence I've seen build up in her throughout the process is very inspiring. Yes, she still comes home tired from work just like you and I do, but she never comes home feeling like what she does is unimportant, like her work has no meaning. I recently shared with her my desire to follow in her footsteps, and her words of encouragement were the final push I needed. I've decided that the trophy waiting for me at the finish line will be a nurse practitioner master's degree. I believe that as a family nurse practitioner I will have a greater ability to reach and help more people. With the right mindset and the dedication to gain the experience and knowledge needed, I see myself taking entrepreneurship head-on. Running a clinic would give me the ability to better care for patients, which is the ultimate goal. After all these years, I've come to realize and accept that nuturing is my nature, and nursing may very well be my calling.