Lewis Hollins Memorial Art Scholarship

I can still vividly remember soothing Sunday mornings, sitting in my room with a pen in my hand and a blank sheet of paper in front of me. The bombastic beats of Sean Paul's music filled the air, making my fingers tap along to the rhythm. As I doodled away, I could hear my mother sweeping the floors of our home. Despite the noise, I felt calm and content, lost in my little world of artistic expression. My mother immigrated as a teenager to the United States in the 1980s. Although she spent most of her life living in America, her Jamaican roots never disappeared. As such, I was able to form a connection to the culture by proxy. Unfortunately, my relationship with Jamaican culture is fractured because I never had the chance to authentically experience the Caribbean. I understand patois, but I can't speak it. I love sorrel and chicken foot soup, but I have no clue how to make it. I've become some sort of a hybrid; Jamaican enough to be othered in school but too American to be considered a “yardee” at home. In a Caribbean family, being an artist is not considered a respectable career, at least not enough to honor my mother’s struggle when she came to this country. My desire to have an art career was seen as childish and a byproduct of my privileged American upbringing. I had to fight for the artistic opportunities I have now. I am a self-taught artist. I began teaching myself near the end of middle school, but my new “hobby” was ignored by my family, and referred to as a waste of time. I relied on verbal affirmations for my art, with no response. This experience taught me to scrutinize my work, identify areas for improvement, and learn from my mistakes. I had no other artistic guidance, so I had to become my own counsel. As I got older, and, in turn, more comfortable with my creations, I came to appreciate how rare it was for there to be eyes on my art; it gave me the freedom to move away from needing each piece to be perfect. Eventually, I began exploring the deeper meaning of my creations, aiming to convey a story rather than just an appealing aesthetic. Through my art, I was also able to learn more about myself and how my point of view differs from the people around me. Being a "hybrid" means my perspective differs from that of my peers as well as my mother. My decisions, likes, and interests are all a by-product of my unique interpretation of the world around me, and, as such, when I'm creating something that reflects my experiences, I feel most creative.