Adoptee Scholarship

I was adopted at eight years old from a Ukrainian orphanage. I still remember the first day I met the people that were going to adopt me, it was scary because I didn’t know a single word in English and they didn’t know a single word in Ukrainian, but they had nice smiles and bought me a doll so I was excited about that. Shortly after this first meeting, I was told I would be adopted. I then got on a plane with total strangers that I could not talk to nor understand and traveled halfway across the world leaving everything familiar behind. This journey has not gone without challenges, there was a lot of playing charades with my new family trying to communicate while I learned the new language. I was also adopted with another girl who became my sister. She has a disability and required/s a lot of my new parent’s attention and time. I struggled to find where I belonged and someone who wanted me, craving this attention from years in the orphanage and lack of attention from my new parents I found a person who gave me attention. This person was my grandfather, he took me to get donuts and let me go pet the neighbor’s dog, and told me I was special, I craved this, I needed someone to see me, and he did. Unfortunately, this was not all my grandfather did, in the midst of the attention he gave, he also sexually molested me for years. Under his excuse of telling me I wasn’t real family, I am just adopted. He went to prison for molesting multiple children when I was 15. It has taken me years to overcome these traumas and though I have not nor will overcome them, I can endure and improve my own life and the life of others who have faced similar challenges. In my healing, I embarked on the journey of finding myself which let me to find my biological family in Ukraine. I found my mama and learned I had four siblings I didn’t know about. I learned that my mama was also a product of the Ukrainian orphanage system and therefore struggled to raise children and had alcohol problems, which is why I ended up at an orphanage. Yet she never forgot about her children and even stayed living in the same place for all these years so that her children could find her one day. It has been a beautiful reunion with daily communication, until, Russia invaded Ukraine this past February. This has limited our contact as she does not always have service and is often stuck in a bomb shelter. My heart aches for her safety and fear that my one connection to help me be me might get stolen away with this war. Since these challenges, I have started school to become a social worker; to work in the adoption field and help educate new adoptive families, and be a support for the adoptee. I currently work at a residential facility serving adolescent males who have struggled in their family life, many of whom are adopted. I plan to continue working in the adoption field and help other adoptees obtain what I struggled to find, caring adults that tell them they are worthy. Thank you for listening to my story.