At the age of twelve, I lost my grandmother six days before my birthday. It was one of the most devastating events to ever occur in my life because she was everything to me. Growing up she took care of me and my brother when my parents were busy with work. She made sure we were both fed, and spoiled us quite a lot. She was one of my closest friends because I could go to her about anything and she was also a mother to me more than my own mother because she provided the love and support I needed growing up. It was very hard to accept the fact that my grandmother was gone because she was a very important piece to my life and without her, it felt like something was missing. When my grandmother's funeral came about, I listened to everyone speak on her life and the impact she had on theirs. Some of the people there were complete strangers that I never seen, of course my grandma would talk to anyone and everyone we would come in contact with, but they would call her grandma as well because she was kind and took care of them like they were her own grandchildren. I even witnessed some of the acts of kindness my grandmother did growing up to a few strangers as well. She was always willing to drive complete strangers to their desired destination, had always made sure people were fed, and was always the first person to greet people when they came to church, and always wanted to let people know that they were loved. Hearing and witnessing people's experiences with my grandmother made me realize that her acts of love and kindness left the most impact in people's lives, they are what made her most memorable. Just as my grandmother meant so much to me, she meant so much to others the same way because she was the perfect example of love and we all need love. Even before I lost my grandmother, I always knew that I wanted to be like her because she was the perfect example of love. After she was gone, I wondered who was going to live out the example that she had in life? Then I realized that I could be the one to do so. Reflecting on my grandmother's life I realized that what everyone needed and wanted, was love. Love is what matters most to me in this life and I want to do what I can to give myself and others the same love that my grandmother had. At times, I admit loving myself and others is very hard to do. I have to fight with myself daily in order to become the person I want to be. Naturally, I am the opposite of my grandmother, I am very shy and reserved and she was very bold and open. I catch myself at times being judgmental while my grandmother didn't judge. It is not easy to put away selfishness, especially since as humans we are naturally selfish but continuing the fight to love is very rewarding in the end.

I am absolutely passionate about illustrating which includes painting, traditional, and digital drawing as well. Ever since I was a child I loved to draw, I did not think much of it at the time other than I loved to create art and that I wanted to draw beautiful illustrations like what I would see in the Media I would watch. Examples of media would be Disney, Cartoon Network, and children's books including illustrations. One of my favorite forms of media was and is still Japanese animation and manga that I would find certain time on the television or at my school library. I didn't get influenced by art work from the internet until later on and speaking of later on, I soon got inspired from video games shortly after. I did not have very many friends in school because of my shy nature so I would often turn to videogames in my free time for entertainment. During my time in gaming I would play The Legend of Zelda and Final Fantasy series which lead me to discover one of the most influential artists in my life, Tetsuya Nomura. I adore his art so much and the characters he designed that were brought to life in the games I played. My own art has some of the elements from his artwork. Finally I decided that I have a passion for Illustration after my short phase of creating fan-art for my favorite media. Everyday since then I wanted to improve my drawing skills in order to have the ability to create eye-catching artwork that people will hopefully be inspired by as well. Overall I create every illustration for my own love and passion towards it. It is satisfying to finish an illustration and the hard work pays out in the end.

My career goal for the future is to become a graphic designer and I plan to go to Fort Lewis in Durango, Colorado to obtain my Bachelor's degree for Communication Design. The reason I chose Fort Lewis is because it is a Native American-Serving Non-Tribal Institution. The other reason is that from what has been explained to me by one of the administers from the college is that it's hands on experience and that the teachers are able to work with you one-on-one. As someone who is very cautious about instructions I need someone to guide me in the assignments. I am one step ahead by being accepted into Fort Lewis, the only thing I need is to submit my enrollment confirmation fee. Other than the goals I have explained, I want to personally do commissions on the side for illustration. Art has always been a passion of mine since I was young and I always knew I wanted to pursue a career that allowed me to work in the creative field and I finally decided that my chosen major would be graphic design. Me and a dear friend of mine have talked about our dream of starting up a publishing company. He wants to major in entrepreneurship while also attending Fort Lewis, while I will do graphic design and we decided to team up to make this dream possible. I will mention that I will most likely be starting a website for it once things become official. I know that We will do the best we can to achieve our goals and that it is not playing around. I am very confident in my choices, career wise, and happy that I have been accepted into Fort Lewis College so that I will finally be able to achieve my goals.

Through tough times I have stayed optimistic by casting down the very negative thoughts that plague my mind and practice becoming my own cheerleader. It was not easy at all because from a young age I have always known myself to be pessimistic and look at the bad side of things due to being around a negative environment. I lived through tough times of childhood trauma, parents fighting and not getting along, being a lonely child in school because of my shy nature, struggling with math, and lastly battling through depression. Having to face these hardships with seemingly no rest or one thing after the other, made me extremely tired at my current age and bombarded with worry. Despite my many trials growing up, I have matured and gained understanding quite quickly through these experiences. I have learned patience, truth, healing, and what can or does heal someone. Overall I gained the understanding that though life is hard and often unfair, it does not give us a right to give up and it does get better. There is a time and place that will reward you with rest and what you deserve sooner or later for passing the many hardships. I have also learned that I was also hindering myself during hard times and allowing these negative thoughts to bother me and drag me down. I had to face the truth that unless I changed how I was living and perceiving things, I would never be able to accomplish my goals. Yes, I had gone through much pain, but I don't have to play the victim and lose the game. I know that as a senior in high school, college and adult life will hold much hardships in itself but I am willing to face them and not give up.

I want my legacy to be inspiring and encouraging towards not only artists but those who are going through a rough time in this life because I sympathize with our young generation along with those who suffer mental illness and trauma. I want people to be able to remember me in a positive manner, I may mess up at times in my life because I am human but I learn from them, repent, and get back up making sure I do better the next opportunity. Overall I want my art and life story to be a source of healing to others. With my art I want people to not only see a beautiful piece but I also want them to get some source of inspiration or empathy with it. The subjects I include in my art include personal experiences, venting, symbolism behind love, and values of what is personally important to me. I know personally by experience and observing others, we often gravitate towards artwork that has subjects that we can relate to in a deep or empathetic way. For my life's legacy, I want people to know me as a kind and understanding person, an advocate for the hurting. Someone who truly cares about not only her audience but to people in general. Someone who was a good representation for her Indigenous people as well. Not only do I want to make art that is a source of healing for others but is also an inspiration towards young or older Indigenous people. I also desire that with myself personally, that I will be looked upon knowing I not only achieved my goals but left behind a good example for her people. This is the legacy I want to leave behind, a life that truly was worth celebrating with purpose.

Giving is important to me because it not only makes me feel wonderful but it makes the person I am giving to feel the same way as well. You never know what a person may be going through and just giving in itself could be a small beam of hope or sign that someone does care for them. I understand this by experience because whenever I was going through a hard time or my mind was swirling with negative thoughts; someone was kind enough to give me some encouragement by a small deed like giving a piece of candy and it made me happy to even think someone would consider giving me something of all people. I had an experience recently at church when a young girl came up to me out of nowhere and gave me a piece of chewing gum. A little before that I was standing outside the service and reflecting on some things that upset me and just something as little as being given a piece of candy made those negative thoughts and feelings disappear. I sympathize with people who suffer from negative thoughts and in this harsh world I want to do what I can to spread more light and love to people in any way I am able. To cheer other people up and not feel left out or down, I do what I can to give back even something small. I give my attention, words of encouragement, advice if needed, my friendship, a hug, a hand in need, well thought out gifts with nothing expected back, and completing a task someone gives to me or I offer to do for them. I may not have all the money in the world but I do have what matters in giving and that is love.

I practice self care by giving myself the time that I need to rest my mental and emotional health. I also make sure to take care of my body by eating right when I can, drinking water, and practicing healthy skin care. I have already been an advocate for mental health since I have had my hardships with depression, OCD, and anxiety therefore it is very important to me to take care of one's self before any other thing. Recently though, I have become a supporter for physical health as well, since both have an effect on each other and problems can manifest from neglecting both. When I was much younger I didn't think or even know the risks of not taking care of myself as a whole and ended up going through awful depression and health problems. It started to open my eyes on how important taking care of yourself as a whole is. I already started practicing mental health care by taking breaks and separating myself from negative fuel, but recently I picked up skin and physical care. Due to both I have seen positive changes in my body and way of thinking. Many of my health problems subsided when I started eating healthier, drinking water, and exercising by taking walks or stretching for at least twenty to thirty minutes. My depression, stress, and mental burnouts disappeared once I rebuked the negative and worrisome thoughts, surrounded myself with things that personally make me happy, and took the time to give myself a break from daily tasks that are overwhelming to me unapologetically. I can say that I am in much better shape and although what I have experienced in the past was awful, I would have never appreciated self care and the importance of it as of now.

Growing up in the middle of nowhere and having much but little, I learned to enjoy the simple things in life as I grew older. Some may think of my interests to be boring but to me they fill me with content and happiness. A simple pleasure I have is watching the clouds and seeing the different patterns each day with the beautiful reds, oranges, yellows, blues, pinks, and purples of the sky, it makes the clouds stand out. I also recently developed a love of birdwatching when I go out on walks or for a drive and its interesting to me to see how they all follow one bird and make every move it makes. At night I love to watch the moths and catch lightning bugs whenever I do go outside. Night time is always fun despite how dark it can be and you never know what kind of interesting creature you will find among the air or ground. Bats are especially cool to see, when I was younger they were my favorite animal and I always wait to see if I can find any flying through the night sky. When I am not outside, I like to stay inside and paint or draw. As much as I love digital art, nothing beats the feeling of having the real materials and tools in your hands along with the smell of art mediums. Lately I have been drawing more due to less free time to make actual pieces, it relaxes me and makes me feel like the carefree child I once was. There are other examples I can give like foods, I appreciate the food I can get even if its a small snack because I was taught to be thankful for being fed and I savor every bite.

During my freshmen year of high school, I was diagnosed with small case of depression. Although it was a small diagnosis of the mental illness, it affected me greatly in not only my way of thinking and mental function but it also affected my physical function. When I wasn't doing school work, chores, or another task, I was sitting in my room meditating on personal fears and self-degrading thoughts which made me feel a sense of hopelessness. I no longer desired the things that made me happy for they could not fulfill that role and I didn't want to spend time doing my favorite hobby which is drawing because it felt wasteful to me. Despite having to live through depression, I overcame the feeling of being unmotivated by pushing myself to go on daily and complete whatever task life threw at me. It was certainly a challenge because of the lingering thoughts and feelings of constant tiredness. A few examples I can name are when I debated on giving up on drawing completely, I would watch motivational videos related to the subject and instead of pushing myself to draw very difficult things, I would do little-by-little at a time and slowly build up to something more challenging. I loved to listen to music and watch media that was uplifting so that I would have something more positive to meditate upon. Another thing I would do was force myself to exercise and eat healthier foods, it was definitely not an easy thing to accomplish but I managed. After a few years of practicing what I have stated, I soon found solace in God after taking the time during quarantine for a desperation of peace to my heart and mind. I am so grateful for that and the lessons I have learned.

What motivates me on a daily basis is God, my friends and loved one, as well as my dreams of becoming a successful manga artist. To go into detail, I am motivated by my love of God because this life he has given me is a gift along with the gifts and talents he has given me to use and share. The people he has allowed me to cross paths with or has put into my life have been a blessing to me which is most of my family, friends, acquaintances, even enemies. Every good and bad experience has been used to shape me and every new experience keeps me going. My friends motivate me because they are my biggest cheerleaders. They are so positive and supportive of me and my dreams, I love them dearly. My loved one is a huge motivation to me especially in the creative field. He himself is an artist in both writing and drawing and we both come up with new ideas every day and I look forward to seeing him every single day, especially at school. I have for a long time been motivated daily to improve in my art skills so I can become a manga artist. It helps me quite much that I find art to be fun and it is a great hobby to pass time although it does require a good amount of patience. Like what I have explained about every new experience that keeps me going, art is the same way. I don't know what to expect from it like how my art will change, what new techniques I will learn, how every piece may turn out, it gets me excited to think of the possibilities and keeps me desiring to improve in order to reach my goals.

A song that most inspires me is "Exist For Love" by AURORA. Although it is a song that came out recently in 2020, it inspired me so much through many hard times I have faced and gave me a sense of serenity and peace in the midst of the storms. During the time of staying at home during quarantine, I was on a search for love and peace in my life which I found in God, not church, but Christ himself. I was battling with depression and severe anxiety and it lead me to think that I could never get out of it. When I made the decision to seek comfort and better myself that's when I found Christ. I felt at peace in him and loved by him and whenever I came across the song "Exist For Love" It explains my love for him in it's purest form. He was the only thing that gave me peace and love that I had always wanted and couldn't find in anyone else. The song explains finding that special someone and falling in love with them in a very pure and heartfelt way. The singer explains how she felt whenever she united with the one she loves and feeling as if she has found everything she ever wanted in her lover. I love this about the song because it explains the sense of being with the one you love most and feeling as if you were made only to love them and it is a very, very beautiful thing. The arrangements in the song is at a perfect pace and gives a very romantic feeling. It reminds me of songs you would hear from the 1930's during romantic scenes and the music video fits so perfectly having symbols of love from mythology.

My favorite artist is Lizbeth R. Jimenez who is of Hispanic origin, a self-taught artist, publisher, and traditional manga artist. She inspires me because when I was going through a hard time in learning how to draw and life in general, I almost gave up on art but when I found her YouTube channel she encouraged me so much to continue and eventually I improved. What fascinates me about her personality is that she is always looking at things in a positive lens whether it be art related subjects or life itself. What I love about her artwork is that she takes much inspiration from folk-lore from around the world and incorporates dark sceneries into them while drawing in a manga art-style but she doesn't just draw manga, she is very skilled in hyper-realism, cartoons, and sculptures.

Patience is an important learned skill that definitely has helped me and am still learning to accomplish. It means so much to me because it helps me to endure trying times and not make hasty decisions I may regret. There have been moments in which I wish that I had patience because when I made decisions out of being hasty, it never ends well. When I do have patience, it rewards me well with good outcomes. Patience and perseverance is a blessing to me and I find that it is true that It rids of difficulties and obstacles. An example I can give is my current journey with learning how to draw. I know how many people often give up when it comes to learning how to draw because they realize it's not just simple steps but years of practice which comes with much patience and endurance. For me, it was just the same, except I took the time to be patient and endure the hard times I kept erasing and redrawing a simple head shape. It was hard and I felt like I was getting nowhere but over time of persevering I managed to see just how much I have accomplished. Having a goal in mind and reminding yourself of the positive outcome can fuel the strength to have patience during the trials and hard times. A driving passion is what personally helped me to have patience and a will to overpower my own feelings and thoughts of making hasty decisions which could have lead me down a dark road. Overall, Patience is a blessing and it takes time and a lot of will power to learn or accomplish. I am very thankful for patience and I will continue to do my best learning and gaining it every day.

What I want my dream life to look like is being surrounded by loyal life-long friends, art or creativity, and simplicity with a little bit of excitement. To extend my answer, I want to graduate college with a sustainable job as a freelance artist. I want to be able to sell my work at conventions and open up a online store, but my main purpose is not only to have good income doing what I love; I want people to adore my art and find value in it as well as be inspired. I don't just want to be another freelance artist though, I want to be a manga artist. I know that I am not the only one with this dream but it is something I have dreamt about since I was young when I first discovered manga. The art-style captivated me at an instant. I had always loved to draw but when I had that experience, I knew instantly that I wanted to draw like they do in manga. Since then, I have been working hard to improve my art fundamentals in order to perfect the art-style. Now the stories I want to base my manga on are folk-lore and legends from my Native American culture. I want to inspire the minority of Native Americans in media and in tribes to make an impact on the art world, letting them know that we are still here and we have much to share with them. I am personally still gathering knowledge of my Native Ancestry, customs, and stories passed down from generation-to-generation but I know that with time as I am more experienced with the world, I can do it. It will be worth it all in the end no matter the hard work I must put into it.

What friendship means to me is love. Why I chosen love is because from my own experiences with long lasting friendships; I found out that the foundation to having one is love. I could have chosen care, trust, or family as my chosen word but all these come from love. When you truly love someone, care, trust, and considering them family comes along with it. If you do not love someone, you will not have any of these follow nor would you care for the people you would call friends and that leads to bad friendships that will not last. Due to this, it is important to love your friends and treat them well and to also be sure to choose the friends you know will do the same. Personal examples I can give is when we would do simple things like whenever one of us would need something for class or forget something like a pencil, one of us would gladly let them borrow one. When it comes to big concerns like needing a shoulder to lean on during hard times or just needing to talk, one of us would always be there to console each other or give advice. Speaking of giving advice, I can give a personal example of a big favor one of my friends did for me out of the love from their heart. When I started a relationship with a guy at my old school, one of my friends warned me of him and it turns out they were right. I was very thankful that she warned me and cared enough to look out for me. In conclusion I would like to say that love lasts forever and keeps friendships together. I will forever be grateful for the friends I have made in life.

What I love about myself is that I am handcrafted to be unique by God. No other person is the same as me just as the next person. I personally understand the struggle with going through self hatred and it is painful and brought so much shame into my life. I hated the way I looked, I hated my voice, I hated my weight, I hated the choices that I made. It didn't help that I was constantly seeing a perfect image of how a girl should be on the TV, magazines, and internet growing up and I wondered to myself "why can I not look or be like her?" One day when I was home, I decided to take a good look in the mirror after watching a video about uniqueness and being created with care by God's own heart. After some time reflecting on the good things I could think of myself and meditating on the positive words that I heard in the video; I started to search through my mind of the positive things I could think of and see about myself. I saw my body as beautiful, my face, hair, voice, and personality. Whenever I looked at another girl, I saw the uniqueness about her rather than being envious of her because I saw that she was not like me and I was not like her. We have different features, traits, and life stories. This of course didn't happen overnight, it took a bit more time. Instead of meditating on the negative thoughts, I would just throw them down and switch to something positive despite my feelings. I know that I am not perfect and I have things I would like to change about myself but I am now able to see myself in love.

My best skill is the ability to draw and it is something I am very confident in. The journey to progressing the quality in my artwork with this skill was certainly not an easy journey but is indeed worth it. I have a few examples of what I study and how I practice to share. The first example I improve in this skill is by studying the fundamentals of art which includes anatomy, value, perspective, proportions, and composition. Understanding and studying the fundamentals of art is very helpful not only to me but to others because they will help you to piece together a beautiful piece of art. The second way I improve in this skill is by studying life from the smallest speck of dust to large landscapes and people. I do this in order to understand what it is that I am drawing and how to accurately portray the objects whether it's stylized or realistic. When it comes to studying or practicing the examples I share, I use the method of repetitive practice, warmups, personal copying, and gesture drawing. For repetitive practice I draw a certain thing over and over until I'm able to fully grasp what I am trying to draw. Warmups are for when I need to practice a particular part of anatomy, poses, or to get stable line work. Personal copying is for personal studies of other artist's work I admire, I use this when I find something that I want to add to my own artwork. Gesture drawing is when I want to practice movement, it is great for poses and fluidity in your art. These are all the examples I can give to you that explains my process in improving art. My journey as an artist is never done and I improve daily.

One thing I do to improve the lives of the elderly people in my community is talking to them or keeping them company. I find this very important because many of the elderly people I know and have witnessed do not have anyone who wants to keep them company, even their own family. The reasons may vary from being busy with their own families, jobs, or just not caring to take the time to talk with their elderly relatives and it's a sad situation to witness and hear about. So many of the elders I ended up conversing with are very sweet and friendly; they want love and attention just as much as we do. A simple conversation will brighten their day and make them feel loved and love brings healing to the heart. I want to make the elderly feel loved, cared, and included in society because they are just as important as any human being. They have so much wisdom, lessons, and information to share with us if we will only listen. One experience I have with keeping an elder company is at my local church. The elder I spoke with was a woman whom was a relative to someone my family knew but she was often seen being by herself. The first time I started talking to her it was at a youth group fundraiser we were having and one of her grandchildren was there. When I talked to her I was shy at first but I took the time to listen and ask questions about her daily life. We ended up becoming friends in the end and it turned out we had many things in common and similar values. It is an experience that I will not forget and will hold it dear to my heart.